Leave A Scar
by SpeakWhenItRains
Summary: AU. After the defeat of Father, Ed and Al fail to get their bodies restored. They're still searching, but with a sudden strange power, and a bounty on Edward's head, things aren't going to be easy. And despite what they say, I'm not doing them any favors, either.
1. Reunited

It was raining when I first saw them.

I was focusing on the map in my hands, hand drawn lines smudged and unreadable due to the sky's water. Great. I folded the paper, tucking it back into my bag. I could probably repair the drawing with Alchemy once this storm clears up. I just hoped I remembered exactly how everything looked...

My train schedule was in better shape, but as luck would have it the current train times were the only ones blurred away. I looked up from the piece of paper, spotting someone standing by the train station I was supposed to be waiting on. The girl was rather short, but what interested me more was the giant suit of armor standing next to her. Weird. Anxiety balled into my stomach. This was why I didn't travel too much.

But the suit of armor was holding an umbrella for both himself and the girl. I guess he couldn't be too bad.

I stepped forward, coming up from behind them, my hand extending towards the suit.

"Um, excuse me."

I touched the arm of the cold metal, immediately feeling the suit's body rise up, a shout quivering from it. I pulled away, immediately apologizing.

A hollow breath sounded against the inside of the suit's helmet, the light that made up its eyes reduced to thin slits.

Wait

Lights? Making up its eyes?

"There something we can help you with?" A smooth voice; one that I didn't immediately place the location of.

I looked towards the voice's direction, to the other person standing there. The person I thought was a girl, but upon seeing the masculine face framed by golden hair all those thoughts were shoved out the window. I calmed myself, the anxiety and slight jump of fear from before withdrawing as I straightened my posture.

"I'm wondering how to get to Central. My train schedule got a little wet." I held up the piece of paper for them to see. By now, the schedule was completely drenched, just like the rest of me.

"Well here," Those golden eyes glanced up, taking in the sight of the umbrella beneath him and the suit of armor as he stepped back a little bit, "There's room for you too. No use getting even more wet."

"Thank you." I stepped in the umbrella's shadow, briefly seeing the guy in the armor shift his hand my direction, making sure I was covered. Warmth touched my chest despite the cold water soaking me. These people sure were nice.

"If you're heading to Central," The Suit said, the voice of a kid ringing out underneath the metal. "You're in luck! We're headed there now."

"Well, as soon as this train gets here." The other guy added. "Takes forever sometimes."

"I don't mind." I said with a little smile. A hand rose to the back of my head, and I felt myself blush a little. "I'm so sorry; I completely forgot to introduce myself."

I told them my name; a word the shorter one politely repeated before extending his hand.

"Call me Ed."

I took his hand, the warmth radiating underneath his glove. "It's nice to meet you, Ed."

I met his smiling eyes before a sudden memory flashed. A child... No, it couldn't be him.

"And I'm Alphonse!" The Suit pointed to himself. "We're brothers!"

I looked to them both, my head shifting to compensate the massive height difference. "Ed... Al... Brothers?"

A grin overtook my bewildered expression. "You two wouldn't happen to be from Resembool, would you?"

"Yeah, we grew up there—" Ed suddenly pointed to me, eyes widening and voice rising. "Wait a minute"—he said my name again, my heart skipping a beat at the hilarity of it all—"From _Resembool_?"

I held a hand to my mouth, quieting a laugh bubbling against my lips. "The very same."

Al turned, looking down at Ed. "Do we know this person, Brother?"

Putting one hand on his hip, Ed leaned to the side, lightly regarding me with a soft smile. "Yeah, she lived nearby when we were little, Al. Only for a year or so."

"And then I moved away." I finished, a blush running along my face. "Parent's decision. Not mine."

Al was quiet, his eyes cast down to the ground beside him.

"I'm sorry. I don't remember you."

"That's alright, Al!" I told him, leaning forward a bit to try and catch his gaze. "It was so long ago. And we all look so different!" I laughed a little, a bit embarrassed when neither of them joined in. If anything, that comment seemed to kill the mood.

Ed raised a hand to the back of his hair, keeping his stare downward. "You're telling me..."

"Look, the train!"

I turned to where Al was pointing, seeing the train's light shining through the heavy curtain of rain.

"Good," Ed stepped forward, lightly swinging the suitcase in front of him. "We can finally get moving again."

He was close by me; close enough to notice that I was still soaking wet from the rain. A smile came to him as he set the suitcase down in front of himself.

"Here." He straightened, still not coming to match my height, and clapped his hands together. He placed both of them on my coat's shoulder, blue light emitting from beneath the gloves. I was warmed instantly, the water evaporating, but I was much more interested in how that happened.

I looked to his closed eyes as he bent down, picking up the suitcase again. "You don't need a transmutation circle?"

"No." he replied. A grin came to him, a thumb hooking back to point at himself as he winked. "Guess I'm just that talented, huh?"

Al, who had watched the whole thing, spoke, voice deflated. "Teacher can do it, too, Ed."

"Will you stop messing up my cool?!"

I laughed lightly, the train slowing to a stop behind me. The brakes sounded, the cars all shifting forward before the door closest to us opened, revealing a worker. His expression remained blank, waiting for our tickets with one outstretched hand.

I dug around in my bag, wondering aloud if he'd take the right amount of money for a ticket. Ed stepped up beside me, suddenly handing the worker enough to cover my fair. More than enough, actually.

I turned to him. "Don't pay for me!"

Ed just grinned, continuing to dismiss every attempt I made to pay him back.

* * *

"You've definitely grown since I've seen you last, Alphonse."

Al shifted his head, looking up enough for those lights to meet my eyes from across the train's seats. An odd feeling met me as I looked into those eyes; something I shied away from examining.

Ed laughed, banging on his brother's arm with a fist. "Well, what can I say? The kid's got an appetite, that's for sure!"

I smiled, looking to Al as the younger brother laughed. Light and bubbly. Almost sounding... Nervous?

"Yep," He patted his stomach with both hands, "Just can't get enough of that food!"

I turned to Ed again. "You've grown a lot, too."

Shifting his finger across the base of his nose in embarrassment, Ed looked away, grinning. "Yeah, you think so? I mean, I have gotten taller since you've seen me last."

"I sure hope so!" I replied, laughing. "We were just kids then."

"How old were we?" Al asked us.

Ed and I exchanged glances; ones without much emotion, only a sharing of information. Ed looked to the middle of our section, in the center of the booth. He remained slumped down with his legs crossed; one ankle resting on his knee.

"You were about three, Al. It makes sense you don't remember, since you were so young, that is."

I nodded, continuing on with his explanation. "Making Ed four and myself five."

"Yeah, that's right." Ed pushed himself up a little straighter, a little taller. "You were a year older than I was." Thought came in between his golden brows. "That would make you..."

"Eighteen now." I answered for him. A smile came to my face. "I'm a full-fledged adult."

A sound of awe came out of Al's armor as Ed gave a brief cheer. I bowed a little, embarrassment reddening my face. Once again, I looked to the suit of armor sitting directly across from me. The wheels of the train below us bumped, moving along with the track's slight grooves.

"Speaking of growing up, I've been wondering about that armor, Al." I began, grinning. "Why don't you take your helmet off? I would love to see what you look like now."

"Uh." Al's head retracted back, eyes shrinking a bit.

"He's shy." Ed replied, taking a bite of a bread roll. I looked beside him, noticing a food cart waiting in the aisle. Ed motioned to it. "You want anything?"

My stomach answered for me. I had been so preoccupied before, I didn't even go back to eat breakfast. I leaned forward towards the cart, then moved back to retrieve my bag. "Yeah, lemme just check—"

"Don't worry about the cost." Ed waved his hand in front of himself. "Just pick out what you want. It's on me."

"Well," I replied, giving him a coy smile as I shifted over one seat, "Someone's _definitely_ changed since childhood."

Ed's eyes closed, hand resting over his mouth in a sophisticated pose. As if that could distract me from the blush touching his face.

I picked out the food I wanted—still of course being wary of the prices—and leaned back into my seat holding two rolls with butter between them. Ed gave a sigh, looking up to the woman in charge of the food cart.

"Give me your most expensive item."

"Ed!" I shouted, but he only smiled as the woman nodded, moving below to the bottom of the cart.

Ed looked to me, that hand still poised in front of his mouth.

"It's not every day you run into a childhood friend."

"But you don't have to celebrate like this!" I protested, squirming in my seat. "Whatever she's getting probably costs hundreds, at least!"

"You worry too much."

"Here you are, sir."

We looked as a champagne bottle was presented in front of him. "Would you like me to uncork it for you?"

Ed trained his eyes on mine, still not letting up that act. "You're legal, right? You drink?"

"Not... Not regularly." I replied quietly, shaking my head. "Not like this..."

"Great! We'll take it!"

"Very well, sir."

"ED!"

A grin finally broke out onto his face. The cork popped out of the bottle, bubbles rising towards the surface without spilling over.

I looked at the glass as it was handed to me with a polite "here you are, ma'am." I thanked the waitress, looking up from the golden liquid swirling in my glass to see Ed snap open his wallet. The total price was recited to him, and I forced myself from screaming again. Ed met my eyes, holding my stare as he gave a smile. His hand withdrew from his wallet, fanning bills away from each other like a hand of cards. More money than I would have expected—more money than everything COSTED.

"What..." Words failed me; how did he have that kind of cash?

He placed the small stack in the employee's palm, telling her to keep the change. In other words, giving a tip that probably more than tripled the original price.

I nearly fell out of my seat, dumbfounded. The employee wheeled into the next car, more than overjoyed.

"One of the few perks of being a State Alchemist." Ed explained, clicking his wallet shut.

"State Alchemist?" I repeated, briefly looking to Al for some sort of clarification. "Since when did this happen?"

Once again, something I said triggered a change in mood. Ed's eyes lowered, a thought I couldn't read hanging in the air between us. If I could just reach out and grab it...

Another thought occurred to me, making me turn behind my seat and look through the car doors in search of the food cart. "Al, you didn't get anything. You want something to eat?"

I looked back to see Ed giving me that small smile again. He shook his head, answering for his brother.

"He ate a lot on the way over here. Almost seems like the guy never stops eating, so it's a relief when he finally does!"

I laughed behind my hand. "I'll believe that!"

"So what brings you to Central City?" Al asked me, keeping his hands in his lap.

"Oh, that's right." I opened my bag, digging around for a moment. "You're a State Alchemist, Ed, you'll probably be able to help me with this."

I sensed Ed's interest grow, and when I turned back, he was leaning forward. I revealed the silver pocket watch, watching interest overtake his face.

"I found it nearby my house." I explained, shifting the watch slightly, hearing the beginning of the chain sound against the metal body. "I was hoping to return it to Central; it'd be pretty bad if this ended up in the wrong hands."

Ed looked up, meeting my eyes. "Have you opened it?"

I shook my head, and at his soft request, I handed the watch over. As my fingers uncurled from the watch, they brushed over Ed's palm. But the feeling of his skin was purely flat. Hard, even beneath the glove.

I returned my hand to my lap, silently regarding his hand before looking back to the watch. He had popped the accessory open, diligently studying the inside.

"Nope." The watch flipped closed with a flick of the wrist. "No engraving. I can't tell who this belongs to."

"I didn't know it was standard practice to engrave it." I said, and as Ed moved to give the watch back, I held up my hands. "It might be better if you hold onto it, Ed. I'll probably be seen as some sort of imposter if I keep it with me."

"Oh," Ed moved, putting the watch in the pocket of his red cloak, "Right. Nice thinking."

I smiled, and for the next few moments, a silence came between the three of us. I looked down, noticing the champagne still in my hand. A blush ran across my face.

"Thank you very much for the champagne."

Ed gave me that same smile. Sincere. That's a good word for it.

"You're welcome." he said my name again, and I felt my heart swell, growing a bit more.

I smiled, my gaze dropping before catching sight of the chain clipped to his pants. The color contrast made it visible, and again I brought up the topic.

"So, a State Alchemist?"

Ed nodded, reaching into his pocket to hold the watch in his hand. The familiar emblem reflected off the sun's light, displayed proudly.

"I hope you won't get the watches confused." I commented.

"Don't worry about it." Ed replied, shaking his head. "I've got mine engraved, so I'll be able to tell even if it gets unclipped."

This caught my interest. "What's engraved in it?"

"A little bit of motivation." Light flickered off his eyes, my stomach flipping.

"It's been about five years since you've past the State Alchemy exam, hasn't it, Brother?" Al asked, the question forcing my stare to him.

"Yeah." Ed pocketed the watch again. "And it'll be six in just a few months."

"Wow," I said, unable to help myself, "You made it in so young..."

"Yeah." he repeated softly. His face was turned to the side, one arm on the chair's rest, side of his hand hovering in front of his mouth. There was something about that position, the way the grey sky was visible in the windows behind him, that made me want to put that sight down on paper. But I wouldn't be able to get the lines right; the curves of his face, the lines lightly etching in between his thin brows. My art would pale in comparison to the real thing.

He caught me staring and I looked away, trying to hide the bit of dignity I had left.

"So what have you been up to all these years?" he asked me.

"I just opened up my own school." I answered. "So I've been pretty busy with that."

"What do you teach?" Al asked me.

I told him, seeing a mischievous grin come to Ed's face. He playfully elbowed his brother's arm. "We know some martial arts ourselves, don't we, Al?"

"Yeah, Teacher taught us."

"That's so cool!" I said. "What style do you do?"

Ed and Al shared a look; then Ed put his hands up, defeated. "We actually never asked before. There wasn't a lot of time before she started throwing punches."

I laughed a little, listening as he continued. "As long as we can get away, that's really all that matters."

"I agree." I said, nodding. I took a sip of my champagne, the taste bringing me back. I forced away the memories. "This teacher of yours sounds pretty great."

"She is." Al said. "We've been her students for a while now."

I nodded in response, not wanting to pry. I had done that more than I needed to today, something I now felt guilty for.

"Hey, you alright?"

I looked up to see Ed leaning towards me, one hand extended out towards my knee but not touching it. I nodded, blushing a little.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I was just keeping quiet. I've asked you both enough questions!"

"Nonsense." Ed leaned back, smiling again. This time, my stomach fluttered a bit. "But we have been talking a lot about ourselves, you're right about that. Are you still drawing? How're your parents?"

"They're... They're good." I replied, looking down at my champagne. I took a small sip before saying, "We don't talk very much, but they're good."

"And your art?" Al asked. "I think I remember some chalk drawings outside our house."

I smiled. "Yeah, I always drew transmutation circles. Sometimes inside more artistic drawings, like bellies of dragons."

"You'd always try to invent new circles." Ed added, grinning a little as he looked at me.

"Yeah. I still play around with them sometimes. Doodling on documents I probably shouldn't."

We laughed a bit at that, all three of us. I sipped my drink again, a little more relaxed.

"So how's your mom doing?" I asked, the question slipping from me.

The response was like stepping into a graveyard. I saw Ed's face, saw Al's eyes lower, and immediately pulled my statement back.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't know—"

"She died." Ed began, his voice rougher than usual. "She passed away when we were around ten."

No words came to me. I felt tears well up behind my eyes, my memories of Trisha now incredibly, bitter sweetly agonizing.

"I'm so sorry."

The pain was released a little, and I bent forward as a sob escaped me. She was gone... She'd been gone for so long, and I didn't even know.

What... What had I been doing when she died? What useless thing had I been wasting my time doing when she slipped away from this world?

"Don't..." Ed's voice, but words escaped from him as well.

I kept my hand over my mouth, tears free-falling to the floor. I was sobbing, the pain racking my body as I heard Ed call my name.

He dropped to his knees, his hands coming to my shoulders. I opened my eyes, lifting my head up enough to meet his stare. Those golden eyes were hurting just as much as I was. No. More. Even more. I saw the tears breaking from his eyes as another sob wracked through my body.

 _I'm so sorry._ I couldn't speak the thought. It repeated over and over, and I hoped Ed could hear it. I hope they both could hear it.

"I am, too." Ed whispered. He still kept my gaze, and slowly, I began focusing more on the eyes in front of me. They were solid, real. Alive.

My breathing began stabilizing, heaviness coming back to my once feather-weight lungs. I looked down as I brought my hand away from my mouth, memories of Trisha still burned into my mind's eye. How could I have not known? How could I be finding out just now?

"We didn't tell you." Ed began. His hands were still on my shoulders, and I focused on the warm one. The one on my right shoulder; his left. "We were too ashamed, trying to fix what we'd done."

My focus snapped to his other hand. The _metal_ hand. Hard, cold. Completely unlike his other.

I couldn't get the words out. I couldn't ask what they had done. A large, large part of me was still fighting to be in the dark.

"We..." I wanted to scream, stop Ed's lips from moving again. _Don't say it‼  
_

His eyes closed, shutting tight.

"We tried to bring her back." His hands gripped my shoulders as pain overtook his face. As if he could no longer block out whatever image his mind was forcing him to watch.

"We tried to get her back again—and we failed."


	2. Central City

I stepped off the train, taking in the busy air that could only be Central City.

"This is amazing!"

"You've been here for about a minute." Ed commented, stepping beside me, suitcase swinging in one hand. "How can you tell this place is so great?"

"Just look at it!" I spun around, arms opening wide. "There's so many people here!"

"Well it _is_ Central for a reason." Ed grinned, Al stepping off the train behind him.

"We should get to headquarters extra fast." Al told his brother.

"Ah, yeah, you're right." Ed looked to me. "We gotta return that watch you found."

I nodded. We began walking away from the train, making our way through the thin crowd of people. I occupied myself by looking at as many faces as possible. Some crying, some refusing to let the tears break as they said their goodbyes. And there were many happy expressions, too. Laughter that accompanied hugs, embraces between lovers. I blushed at this, looking away in fear of intruding and ruining a special moment.

Suddenly, a large man stepped into our path. He was dressed in a blue uniform, decorated with a few badges on his collar and stripes running along the tops of his shoulders. I hardly noticed these details. My focus was taken by how _muscular_ he was.

His hands were on his hips, eyes shut and pink sparkles dancing around his face.

"Elric Brothers!" he said, mustache bouncing with every majestic word. "My heart warms at the sight of seeing you in Central again. I've longed for the day and now I can't believe it's finally here!"

Edward stepped up beside me, a smile on his face that almost looked nervous. "Yeah, it's nice to see you too, Major." He turned towards me, then lifted a palm out as he spoke to the muscular man again.

His introduction was quick, just saying my name and how I was new to Central. I felt a flash of annoyance. I mean, it was mostly _true_ —I'd only been to Central once, when I was little—but how the heck did he KNOW?!

The man's eyebrows rose, the curling swirl that made up his hair bouncing at his surprise.

"New to Central? Then allow me to show you—" His shirt suddenly gave way to rippling muscles, allowing his body to strike an equally flattering pose. My mouth dropped open. "—The physique that's been passed down the Armstrong line for generations! A true sight to behold, wouldn't you agree?"

I forced my mouth closed and blushed a little, listening as Ed turned away, voice annoyed.

"We're really not in the mood for a muscle show, Major!"

Armstrong's bicep was suddenly in Ed's face, muscle bulging rhythmically. "Nonsense! Look at the form! The structure! You can't see art like this in museums, Edward Elric!"

"Get that thing away from me!"

When I turned, Ed had both hands on the Major's arm, trying to push it away.

"See? It's magnetic! You can't resist the beauty!"

"Will you shut up?!"

I laughed behind my hand. Ed's face relaxed, eyes looking at me. I barely saw something of a blush creep up before Armstrong stood, towering over all of us.

"Well this was very memorable, but I must get back to my duties." His pec muscles tightened, chest flexing as if it was a wave goodbye. "I bid you all farewell!"

We said our goodbyes, and after picking up the tattered remains of his shirt, Armstrong left. I watched Ed sigh, posture hunching.

"That guy is a handful sometimes."

"Especially when you're gripping his arm like that!" I teased.

We all started walking away as Ed scoffed, that annoyance coming back to his face. "Yeah, right. You probably enjoyed that, didn't you?"

"Enjoyed you being embarrassed or how muscular that guy was?"

Ed looked away from me, hands in his pockets as something of an irritated groan came from him. I laughed again, Alphonse joining me this time.

"Major Armstrong does get a little bit excited sometimes, but he is really nice..."

Ed glanced towards his younger brother. "Yeah, I guess." he replied, looking ahead again. "This place wouldn't be the same without him."

Al nodded. I briefly retraced the strange conversation we had with Armstrong, a thought occurring to me. As we exited the train station and entered a sunny strip of shops, I looked behind myself towards Al, making sure to regard both of them as I spoke.

"So how's Winry doing? Is she still in touch with you guys?"

"Uh, yeah," Ed answered, glancing at me from the corner of his eye, "We only go back for mechanic work but she's alright. In a relationship with some guy from Dublith, which is interesting." I couldn't read the tone of his voice; a roughness was touching his words... I listened, looking down at the path ahead as he continued. "Last I heard, they were making plans to marry."

I suddenly caught on, the tone clicking. "But Winry's still young, isn't she? There's always time for things to change."

Ed looked at me, seeming surprised. He smiled, a bit embarrassed as he put his hands up in defense. "Oh, no, I'm not talking about myself. Al had a little thing for her, so it was kind of a bummer when we found out, that's all."

"Thanks, _Brother._ " The teen in the metal suit looked absolutely devastated, stopping in his tracks.

We stopped walking and Ed turned to his younger sibling, a grin on his face. "Hey, what kind of brother would I be if I didn't tell everyone about your crushes?"

Al began walking again, our pace continuing as he said, "You had a thing for her, _too_ , you know."

"Yeah, when I was like seven." Ed hurried in front of us, pointing to a shop on the corner. "Is that a bakery up there? It's been years since I had something."

He dashed off, leaving me to watch Al's head move in a half-circle, a sigh sounding against the helmet of his suit. The equivalent of rolling his eyes in such heavy armor, I suppose. Either way, I laughed against my hand, my amusement mainly directed at Edward.

By the time we entered the shop, Ed was already buying something. I stepped up beside him, watching as he was handed a hot croissant from over the display counter.

"Don't you have some important Alchemist business to attend to?" I asked.

Ed scoffed, handing over more money than necessary and holding his hand up to the cashier trying to figure out how to give him change. Her face was dumbstruck, but Ed ignored it, replying to me.

"Please. That can wait; we're in no hurry to put the leashes back on."

He ripped off a piece of the croissant with his mouth and immediately dropped it, his mouth burning.

"HOT HOT HOT!"

Al giggled, the sound funny in itself, considering the suit it was coming from. "You're just avoiding another lecture from Mustang, aren't you, Brother?"

Ed stopped the frantic waving of his arms, tongue hanging out for a second before he recovered, straightening to his full (still not too tall) height.

"Of course not, Al." he was saying. "Trust me, I could take that hot head any day of the week." He turned to me, giving that soft smile again. "We just have a guest, that's all."

I put both my hands up, flustered at the attention. "Oh no, please, let me know if I'm being a burden."

"Nonsense." Ed walked up to me, hooking an arm around my shoulders and swinging us both around to face the counter again. "I'm buying again. What would you like?"

" _Brother..._ " Al sighed, "You can't avoid him forever..."

Ed turned to look over his shoulder, about to protest. I took the opportunity to slip out from underneath his arm, diligently putting it back to his side. The look on his face was almost something of disappointment.

"It really seems like you guys are busy." I began again. "And you already have the watch I found, Ed, so I guess my work here is done!"

The State Alchemist shook his head. "They'll probably want to question you, get some idea of what you saw." I opened my mouth, but he shut down the words before they even escaped. "Even if you didn't see anything. If I turn this in, they'll be questioning me to no end. And I wouldn't know what to say 'cause I didn't find the thing."

"Yeah, you're right." I turned around, looking past the shop's windows and into the strip. "We should get this over with. Where do I need to go again?"

"We're heading in the same direction." Ed replied, leading us out of the shop. "Leave it us."

"Yeah!" Al exclaimed, putting both hands in the air. "We'll be your escorts!"

I laughed lightly, taking his huge arm in both of mine. "Yeah, in a dangerous town like Central? Al, you're such a kid!"

"I'm not a kid!" We all stopped walking, watching Al put his other fist against his hip. His eyes closed, head tilting upwards proudly. "I'm almost seventeen!"

"Point made." Ed grinned, laughing along with me. He turned to me, suddenly serious. "But what you said about Central. Don't underestimate this place. There's been some really bad stuff going on lately."

I let go of Al's arm, listening as the teen in the suit spoke. "Yeah..."

"What's been going on lately?" I asked, walking with them again.

I saw Ed shake his head, dismissing my question. "Nothing to worry yourself with. Military business. Top secret stuff." He looked upwards, towards the roofs of the buildings.

"Central Headquarters is a few minutes away." he said. "We should be there soon."

* * *

"So? What'dya think?"

I turned away from Ed's grin, looking around the hallway we were walking down.

"Well it's not what I expected." I told him. "I guess I've always imagined Headquarters to be... A little darker..."

"Huh."

I didn't know what to make of Ed's response, hearing him turn away from me to look at the many windows shining bright afternoon light inside.

"Yeah, guess you're right." he responded finally. "After everything the military's done..."

His words trailed off, leaving only our footsteps to echo down the hallway. Alphonse was following behind, the steps of his suit much louder than our own. I wondered how he manages to stay in that thing for so long.

The hall we were walking along ended, leading to a room with a few tables and chairs. I caught a glimpse of a few books lying around before spotting a man walking by.

"Hey, Hughes!"

The man turned at Edward's voice, glasses flickering off light. He grinned, widely waving to us as we all met in the center of the room.

"Hey there!" he called. "Seems like it's been a long time since I've seen you two back in Central. That kidnapping case took a lot out of you, huh?"

Ed sighed. "Yeah, it was a tough one."

Hughes turned to me, putting a hand to his chin. "This wouldn't happen to be the girl that was missing, would it?"

I quickly shook my head, saying I was just a long-time friend of Ed and Al's. Hughes grinned, and the next moment my hand was being shaken like there was no tomorrow.

"Well my name is Maes Hughes, it's very nice to meet you!" My hand was suddenly released, and I watched Hughes reach into his pocket. Beside me, Edward braced, a nervous look coming to him as Hughes spoke.

"And really what would an introduction be without—" A photo was suddenly in my face. "—My darling daughter, Elicia!"

I leaned back, getting far enough away to examine the photo and see a girl. Her light brown hair in twin pigtails, one finger at the edge of her smiling mouth.

"Elicia just turned five the other day! Five! Can you _believe it?!_ " His voice curled up into a higher pitch at the end, and despite feeling a little weirded out I gave my best response.

"Five?" I repeated. "No... No way..."

"Hughes!" A voice I considered my savior barked. "Don't you have something else to do?"

I turned, seeing a man walk forward and stop near the east entrance of the room. A blonde haired woman was trailing behind him, a clipboard held against her chest.

The picture of Elicia was brought away from me. Hughes straightened, speaking to the other man.

"Oh, hey, Brigadier." he said. "Well, to be honest, I was just on my way to get some coffee. Been working pretty hard on this Boiler Room case lately."

"Boiler Room?" Ed asked, shifting his weight to one side. "You guys are still working on that?"

Hughes nodded, suddenly serious. "It's a tricky situation, Ed. Don't underestimate it. There's a lot of factors involved that we just can't piece together quite yet."

"Huh."

I sensed Ed spin around, and before he could finish saying "well, see ya later then!" I grabbed his waving arm.

"Isn't this your job?" I asked, concerned.

Ed sent me a harsh stare, and instantly I felt like I was out of line for asking. I heard Hughes hum in thought, and when I turned around, he was speaking directly to Ed.

"You know, having an extra pair of eyes on this case wouldn't be such a bad idea. What'dya say, Ed? You mind sticking around for a few minutes to read over the files?"

"Uh…" Ed blinked a few times; thoughts probably leaving him. He gave a weak grin. "Well, I just saw Mustang pass by and—"

"Ah, c'mon." Hughes waved a hand. "That guy's not goin' anywhere. It'll just take a few minutes, promise!"

Ed sent me that same face again, and I could almost hear his thoughts. _Look at what you did‼_

I was ashamed to say the least, masking the failure with a dumbstruck smile. I let go of his arm as he lowered it back down, turning to his superior in defeat.

"Yeah, sure, I'll look over the files."

"Great! And while you're doing that, I'll entertain your friend here with more photos of my daughter, Elicia!"

Ed gave me a cynical smile, and I couldn't help but bow my head. I stifled a sigh. If karma existed, this was definitely it.

* * *

"Now which photo do you like more?"

I scanned over the three he was holding out. All of them looked pretty much the same; just different shots of different outfits with different cutesy props. I suddenly grew nervous, seeing his intense eyes watch me from above the photos.

"I... I don't know!" I said, faking the enthusiasm again. "They're all so cute. I couldn't pick just one of them!"

" _Right?_ " Hughes gushed, even going so far as to put his hands up to his face. "I couldn't pick either; it's absolutely _impossible!_ "

Walking footsteps came to my left. My head turned towards the noise, heart leaping at the chance for a distraction. Ed walked past us, hand outstretched above the table.

"The owner of the pet shop did it." The folder fell on the table between us, slapping down and fluttering some photos in the air.

"Wha—" Hughes opened the files again, immediately pouring over them. "How do you know?!"

Ed rolled his shoulders, and briefly I heard metal clicking together. "His testimony doesn't make any sense. The marks on his door were done with a knife, not cat claws. He staged the alibi, plain and simple."

Hughes gave a hum of agreement as he nodded. Then he closed the thick folder, flapping it at me as he spoke. "See, that's what happens when you're too close to something. You can't see the bigger picture and miss out on what you were searching for in the first place!"

"Yeah." Ed replied, clearly not caring as he picked up the suitcase he had set on the floor near me. "We should probably get going—" He suddenly looked around, mouth dropping into a wide frown. "Where the heck did Al go?!"

"Oh, he left for the library." I replied. My stare went to the wall on my left, checking the time. "I told him to come back at a quarter-after, so he should be here any minute…"

Ed sighed, scuffing his boot against the floor as he slumped over to me and Hughes.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

Edward sat down in the chair besides mine, one hand supporting his jaw as he leaned over the table. "Oh, nothing. I just get worried about that big lug being alone sometimes!"

I laughed, giggling behind my hand. "He's in a giant suit of armor! Who's going to try and do anything?"

"You'd be surprised..."

I caught Hughes staring at me, giving a look I couldn't read. Almost... Surprise?

"Is there something wrong?" I asked quietly.

The State Alchemist shook his head, wiping the expression from his face. "No, nothing." His hand moved, lifting the folder in a small gesture. "Thanks for your help on this case, Ed. It's appreciated." He stood up before noticing all of the photos still on the table.

A grin overtook his face. "But before I go, let's finish up all these pictures of Elicia!"

A collective groan met this statement, but I quickly turned mine into a laugh.

"I—can't wait!" I said, forcing a smile.

"Great!" Hughes gushed, reaching into his pockets to pull out more photos. They spilled from his hands and onto the table, littering the folder he had set down.

"Can't we do something else?!" Ed groaned.

Hughes put his hands on his hips. "Y'know you're probably going to want kids some day, too, Ed. Might as well learn to like other people's."

"I... I do like Elicia!" Ed put his hands up nervously. "She's a doll, honest!"

" _Isn't she?!_ "

I looked past Hughes' gushing face, noticing that that same guy walking around again, the blonde lady with him. He was holding something up and looking to her, almost in question if he should use it or not. She just shook her head, patience never faltering.

"Hey. Mustang. Wait up." Ed stood, grabbing my arm along with him.

I turned to Hughes and said my goodbyes as Ed pulled me away, walking a little too quickly to still be polite. In the next moment, we were stopped in front of the guy I assumed to Mustang.

"What is it, Fullmetal?" he asked.

I turned to Ed, hoping for clarification on the name. He only dug around in his pocket, revealing the watch I gave him earlier. "Here, before you start getting on me about that case in North City."

When Mustang didn't respond, I looked up from the watch, nearly jumping when I saw him staring at me.

"Who's your friend?" Mustang asked Ed.

Ed's shoulder motioned to me as he told him how I was "an old friend of his and Al's." A better intro than before...

Mustang glanced back to me, deep eyes meeting mine before he gave a curt nod. I couldn't help the smile that came to my face as I nodded back, a little flustered at being included like this.

Mustang turned back, finally acknowledging the watch in Ed's hand. "It's a pocket watch. What about it?"

"It's not _mine._ "

Mustang's interest perked, and he looked towards me. I stepped forward a bit, looking to the watch in Ed's palm and reciting the memory.

"I found this outside my house. I live in Lautoxan, so it's a little rare to see something like this lying around."

I watched Mustang nod, surprise on his face as he took the watch from Ed's hand. He raised it up to the light, and a moment later, he grunted, as if noticing something.

"What?" Ed asked.

A crack suddenly split down the middle of the watch. Surprise and shock came from Ed and I, Ed's voice rising.

"W-What'd you do that for?!"

Mustang remained calm.

"This watch is a fake." he said. "Someone's been impersonating a dog of the military."

"Someone would do that?" I asked, regarding the now broken watch. "Why go to all the trouble?"

"I dunno." He tossed the watch back to Ed, who quickly caught it with both hands. "But Ed, I want you to find out. Don't screw this up like that last case you did."

I could practically see steam rising from Edward as he yelled at the back of Mustang's head. An arm raised in response, waving to both of us as he walked away.

"I gotta go do some really important Brigadier duties." he said, almost yawning the words.

"Yeah right! Why don't you turn something in early for once?!"

Ed gave a quiet sigh, relaxing. I had both my hands by my face, a little scared at the outburst. After staring at the watch in his hands for another moment, he looked to the Brigadier again.

"Wait a minute," Ed called. "How'd you know this was a fake?"

Mustang looked over his shoulder, taking one hand out of his pocket to give a half-shrug.

"Whoever made this was short on steel and infused what little they had with pewter, making it easier to break under some weight." he explained, turning back. "Some basic Alchemy, Fullmetal."

I looked back to Ed, again wondering about the strange name. But Edward was almost steaming again, gritting his teeth as he pushed up one of his sleeves.

"I'll show you some basic Alchemy, you flame retardant piece of—"

"Brother!" Footsteps were banging against the ground, and I looked to see Al waving as he ran up to us.

"Oh, hey, Al." Ed replied. He was perfectly calm, showing no signs of the worry he expressed earlier. "Heard you were at the library. You find anything good?"

Al shook his head. "Just some stuff on transmuting food."

Ed sighed. "Some more cooking alchemy?"

"You'll never know when we'll need it, Brother!"

Ed turned to me. "You can cook, right?"

A deep pain flashed inside my chest—memories of that same question being asked by a different voice. I blinked, recovering much quicker than I expected to, saying the first thing that came to mind.

"Why? You can't?"

The comment struck a nerve. Ed's face went red. "I-I can, too!"

Al giggled, the sound reverberating within his armor. "Burning fish doesn't count, Brother!"

"Hey, we got a lot better at making those by the time Teacher showed up again."

"Oh!" Al looked down, suddenly noticing something. He pointed to it. "The watch in your hands... It broke."

Ed followed his stare to his own hand. "Oh yeah."

He tossed the item upwards, catching it again. "Someone's been disguising themselves as a State Alchemist, and we gotta find out who. So looks like we're catching the next train back to Lautoxan."

I barely hid my burst of fear. "Why my town?" I asked.

Ed looked to me. "Well I figure it's best to go back to the scene of the crime. Your house _is_ back in Lautoxan, right?"

Memories flashed, pelting equally dark feelings against my heart. I took Ed's arm, trying to laugh the pain away from reaching my face. "Why head back now? This is my first time seeing Central, isn't it?"

"Yeah but there's not much else to see. You already walked down most of the best shops and you've been as far as you can go inside Headquarters... And besides, this case just got opened, so we shouldn't wait to start investigating."

I silently cursed myself, stifling a sigh. Ed didn't move to take his arm out from my hold, and noticing this, I quickly broke our contact. "Sorry!"

Ed just shrugged one shoulder, looking at me with a face I couldn't read. Then he rolled his neck, facing forward again.

"Guess we're on the next train back."

They both walked forward, heading towards the exit. I waited for a few moments, willing myself to step forward and join them. I forced myself to move, knowing I had to.

I just didn't think I'd be returning home so soon...

* * *

 **A/N:** Wow; honestly never thought I would be posting this chapter. I wrote about 100 pages of this fic in one single week, and it improved my writing style so much it was crazy. I figured that was the reason it came to me, but after finally finishing Brotherhood (fell in love with the original anime around nine years ago, when I was eleven), I just wanted to see where I could take this story. So, hope you enjoy! I'll be posting chapter three next week, unless there's people who would like to read it sooner :)


	3. Coming Home

"Well, here we are!"

I couldn't bring myself to act like I was happy about Ed's announcement. I stayed standing by the opening of the white picket fence, barely on my own property. I guess it _was_ my house, after what happened, but right now I was feeling like this building was the one owning _me_. I couldn't move. Couldn't reply to Ed's comment, couldn't look up to meet their stares. My eyes closed instead, trying to hide away in that darkness. I didn't want to be here again...

"You said the watch was outside?"

I looked up as Al turned towards me. A hint of surprise sounded from him, making me realize how obvious my emotions were. I swallowed, trying to distract myself by looking at Edward. But he was standing still, too, his face expressing the light concern that Al's couldn't.

In response to the younger Elric's question, I nodded, keeping my knuckles against my mouth. Realizing I had to speak, I carefully tilted my hand away, pointing a little with one finger. "Near the porch. To the left side."

Al went to look in the spot I directed him to, and I raised a hand to my hair, shielding my eyes away from Ed's. Doing all that I could to avoid his stare. Eventually, finally, his feet moved, bringing him and his curiosity away from me.

 _I deserve it._ This thought nearly broke me. Being near this house... Being here again... Everything was too much.

"No, I'm not seeing anything." Ed's voice was the foreground to the sound of bushes rustling.

I saw him turn away, starting back towards me with both hands in the pockets of his coat, head held a bit high. "Guess there's nothing here, Al. We should look some other place."

I guess Al caught on to what his brother was actually saying, because the teen in the suit just nodded once. Not protesting about how they had just started looking, or how hadn't even checked around the back of the house. Or inside...

My lungs contracted at the thought of stepping into those dark rooms again. I suddenly felt a gentle tug against the shoulder of my sweater, seeing Ed pass by me. His fingers slipped away from my clothes, pressure leaving as softly as it had come. I obeyed the motion, turning around and stepping through the entrance of the white picket fence again, feeling a little bit like I could breathe.

I walked a few steps behind Ed, hearing Al's footsteps echo behind ours.

"Do you think someone would remember seeing a State Alchemist here?" Alphonse asked.

Ed nodded, keeping his hands behind his head. "That's what I'm thinking. Figure if that pocket watch was used at all, someone around here would remember it."

We passed by the corner of the fence, and after a few more steps, we were officially off the property.

I looked towards the home of my next door neighbor as we started by. Someone who had greeted me the day we both moved in. I shut out the memory, the sight of his face... Of the note...

"Should we ask them?" Al's voice, talking about the neighboring home.

"Doesn't look like they're home." his elder brother responded. "We'll try again later."

I knew what he was doing before I looked in the window as we passed by. Faint shadows moved behind the curtains. One of them sitting on an armchair, the other moving around.

We stepped up on the porch of the second house. Hearing Al's footsteps stop, I looked a little bit behind me, seeing him stand near the front lawn. I turned back as Ed approached the door, knocking with his left hand.

An old woman answered, and I recognized her instantly. Mrs. Silva.

"Yes? Can I help you, young man?"

"Hi," Ed began, a light smile in his voice, "I'm a State Alchemist, and I'm conducting an investigation about a crime that happened nearby. I was wondering if you had any time to answer a few questions."

"State Alchemist?" she repeated. "Oh, it's been a long time since I've seen one of those."

I sensed Ed and Al's interest perk. Ed moved his coat, and I hear the chain of his watch sound as he withdrew it from his pocket.

"Do one of these look familiar to you? Have you seen one lately?"

The woman shifted her glasses, the lens catching light as she focused.

"Not in a long while. My husband was a State Alchemist, but he passed away three years ago."

"He was in the military." Ed paraphrased, a softness in his voice. He returned the watch to his pocket. "I'm sorry."

The widow shook her head. "I'm sorry I couldn't be of more help to you, young man."

"It's alright." Ed slid a foot back, preparing to step away. "Well, thanks for your time, then."

The old lady nodded softly. She began to turn away, head bowing slightly before perking back up. Behind her glasses, I saw her squint at me. And then, she did what I was silently pleading for her not to: she recognized me.

She spoke my name, the word like a bullet to my chest. The flash of pain came a second time before she continued on. "Is that you? It's been ages since I've seen you, dear. I figured you and that nice gentlemen moved out!"

I felt tears sting my eyes and forced them down. I was _not_ letting them break. I ignored the fact that Ed had turned around when she called my name. I ignored his stare, keeping my focus on my friendly neighbor as much as possible.

"I'm still here!" I said, faking the enthusiasm horribly. "I've just been busy, that's all."

"Hm." Her glasses shifted as she adjusted them. "Well, don't be a stranger anymore, dear! It's been a long time, and Lord knows I'm not getting any younger, that's for sure."

I hooked a grin onto my face. "Of course. I'll come by and visit soon."

She smiled, and after exchanging goodbyes with the alchemist in front of me, closed the door.

Ed spun himself around, and I was surprised he didn't question any part of that conversation. He only passed by me again, voice depressingly quiet.

"Let's keep going..."

I watched him stride over the small series of steps on the porch, my own feet soon following after. I took the steps one at a time, moving on the balls of my feet as if the steps would somehow break with enough pressure. I heard Al's voice ask how we did.

"Nothing yet." Ed responded. "But we got a lot of houses to go. Someone's gotta remember seeing something." He turned to me. "You don't have to stick around..."

I shook my head. "No, it's okay." It was something to focus on, something to distract myself with. What else would I be doing, anyway?

I shut out the memories trying to drag me back, focusing on Ed as he nodded at my response. That look was back on his face; the one that felt like he was trying to figure me out.

Finally, he turned away, starting around the fence and down the sidewalk again. "Well, okay... If you say so..."

We kept going door to door with similar, unyielding results. There were very few people who recognized me, though; my breath kept catching in my throat whenever the door would open, my heart seeming to stop as the neighbor's eyes glanced over all of us. Most of the time, no one recognized me, and this allowed me to breathe until heads were shaken and the door shut again.

It wasn't until the fifth house that our luck began to change. Ed began to go through the same routine as before, but he was interrupted at the mention of being a State Alchemist.

The guy he was trying to interview threw his head back. "UGH. Another one!"

Everyone's interest grew at that statement.

"What do you mean 'another one?'" Ed asked.

The man shook his head, stepping back a little. "Look, I already gave one of your military buddies all of the peanuts I had."

Ed and I blinked, completely lost.

" _Peanuts?_ " Ed repeated.

The door began to close, but Edward stepped forward, forcing it open with a foot. "Wait! This guy you're talking about. Do you remember what he looked like or why he needed the… uh, peanuts?"

The door opened again with a growl. The man had one hand against his hair, thinking hard.

"I don't know. Brown hair. Wearing a pretty thick coat. I just remember he wouldn't shut up about needing all this stuff."

"What else did he take?"

"Just kinda basic household items. He left with my bleach, too."

"Do you remember where he went?"

The man leaned forward, suddenly angry. "I dunno; why don't you go ask the next house instead!"

Ed snatched his foot back just as the door slammed shut.

The alchemist spun around. "Well, we finally got our lead!"

"I hope the next person we ask is a little more friendly..." Al said as Ed and I approached him.

"Doesn't matter!" Ed tossed the broken pocket watch upwards and caught it again. "We've got a good idea of who we're looking for now, so from here on out it's a total cake walk!"

But hours later, we'd gone through so many houses. Ed was on the ground, exhausted, and I had to lean against Al in order to stand up.

Ed put his hands on his hair, squirming in anger. "WHY THE HECK CAN'T WE FIND THIS GUY?!"

"Well, we did get a lot of information on him." I opened up the notebook in my bag, thumbing past drawings and sketches.

Al noticed these, finger pointing and stopping the pages from moving. "Hey! You're drawing transmutation circles again!"

I grinned up at him, hiding the fear away. "Y-yeah. I still do that from time to time."

Ed sat up, turning to looking behind himself and stare at me. "You were gonna say something?"

I remembered, nodding and continuing to turn to the right page. Not too quick, not too eager. I wanted to make sure I looked like these drawings were normal to me. Completely nothing.

I found the right page, stopping on it and scanning down the list of ingredients. Words I heard the townspeople mention. I read everything off, including the rough unit of measurement. Ounce of this, a small amount of that.

When I was done, neither of them said anything. I began to wonder what was wrong when Ed snapped his fingers from his place on the ground, as if suddenly remembering something.

"Aster flowers." he recalled, pointing one finger towards me. "Plants have a pretty high concentration of magnesium in them."

"Oh." I quickly wrote that one down, adding it to the bottom of the list. I suddenly remembered where that ingredient came from. A house with a girl around my own age; she'd been flirting with Ed constantly, and I had to make small talk with Al in order to avoid it.

I shook the memory away, looking over the list again. My eyes stopped on the second ingredient.

"But why the need for bleach?" I asked, pen in between my teeth.

"Dunno." Ed responded. "Maybe to try and throw off whoever was wanting to follow him."

"Or maybe he needed his kitchen clean." Alphonse chimed in. Ed just stared at his younger brother and I couldn't help but laugh.

"Yeah," Ed responded, a smile in his voice, "I'm sure that was it, Al."

He got up from the ground, looking to the side as he stood up. I followed his stare, noticing the sun was setting.

"We should probably call it quits for now." he said, putting his hands in his pockets.

My heart momentarily stopped beating. This was it—they were going to ask to stay the night. I couldn't go back into that house. Not after being out again—

"There's some kind of inn around here, right?" Ed asked me.

I looked to him, feeling more appreciation than I could remember having. I don't know how he was this perceptive, but I was so thankful for it.

"Yeah." I replied. "I've never been to it, but it's fairly close to the station."

"Works for me." Ed walked away, starting down the sidewalk again. He left as Al bowed to me, low enough to show respects for both of them.

"Thanks for everything." Alphonse said. "It was nice to meet you—again!"

Hearing footsteps stop, I looked away from a nervous Al to see Edward turning to stare at me from over his shoulder. One golden eyebrow raised.

"You're staying with us, aren't you?" Ed asked. "In case you remember anything about the watch."

I've never felt so indebted to someone. The relief on my face was obvious, a soft grin arriving on my lips as I placed a hand to my chest. "Yes, of course."

Al straightened. He briefly shifted his head in the direction of my house, and I sensed something click in that brain of his. I was thankful once again. I couldn't explain even if I wanted to.

No; I could explain... I just didn't want to.

I tried to hold back the weight that set into my heart. I looked up, hearing Ed call my name.

"You comin'?"

"Y-Yes." I replied. I hurried over, smoothing out my knee-length skirt. My strides matched theirs, following behind Ed and placing me next to Al.

"So," Al began, turning his head towards me, "Do you draw anything else besides transmutation circles?"

"Uh." I saw Ed look towards me, watching from behind his shoulder, staring from the corner of his eye. "Y-yeah. I really don't sketch anymore, though. It's kind of a thing of the past." I tried to laugh this off, sure my casual tone was completely transparent.

"Yeah, that makes sense." Edward said, turning back. "We all have things we grow out of."

I sensed there was something more to that statement; like he was talking to himself in some way. My thoughts left me as Al spoke again.

"You're probably very busy with that martial art school you run, huh?"

"Al," Ed cut in, "Let's not bug her with so many questions, yeah?"

"N-No, it's fine!" I held one hand up. I had to seem like I was completely comfortable with this... "It makes sense; I mean, we haven't seen each other in so long, after all."

Ed looked at me again for a moment before turning back. He stayed quiet, allowing me to turn and answer Alphonse.

"I guess I am a little busy." I told him. "It's definitely hard work, with so many students and all."

"I bet!" Al put his hands in the air, like a little kid. "That's so awesome! They must be really lucky to have a teacher like you!"

I just smiled, trying to calm the feeling of my stomach dying. My expression fell as Al relaxed his arms, asking another question.

"But do you have to go back to teach soon?"

I understood his question; it hadn't even dawned on me.

"I... I don't know..." I told him, looking away. Part of my mind focused on the Flamel insignia on Ed's back, how smooth it looked over his slumped posture. "I guess maybe soon... Or I could always call, have someone else cover..."

I saw Ed glance back, his posture straightening a little, wrinkling the design again. Al replied, happier than ever.

"Great!" he said. "Maybe you could teach me how to draw—I've always wanted to learn!"

 _Please don't make me._ I looked to him, faking the best grin I could. "Yeah, that would be fun!"

I heard Ed grin, laughing a little. "Maybe you'll stop drawing cats as stick figures, Al!"

"Hey! I sometimes draw them with legs!"

"Yeah," Ed held up a hand, creating the smallest amount of space in between his thumb and forefinger, "Legs that are this thin. They're completely malnourished!"

"It's not like your art is any better, Brother!"

"I never said mine was!"

"Well... At least I don't draw faces that look like puppets!"

"Puppets? Oh, you're talkin' about my drawing of Envy?" He laughed again. I was curious about the name but kept my thoughts to myself. I didn't want to ruin this moment with things that didn't concern me.

"That was years back." Ed continued, waving a hand away. "I'm sure I've gotten better since then!"

"Oh, yeah?" There was a challenge in Al's voice.

Ed stopped and turned around, a grin on his face. "Yeah." he returned.

Al stopped walking, and I halted beside him. The teen in the suit spoke again, voice directed at me.

"Can I see your sketchbook, please?" he asked.

"Uh, yeah. Of course." I ignored the feeling of complete doom as I got the book out of my bag again, feeling the dark weight leave my hand as Al took it along with a pen.

He offered both to Ed. "Prove it."

Ed just shifted his weight to one hip, grin becoming a little sharper as he took the utensils. "Prepare to eat your words, Al."

I felt more than a little nervous as he flipped open my sketchbook, his thumb releasing pages and speeding past hundreds of drawings. I didn't even realize how much I had drawn... Before…

My memories fled as Ed stopped at a blank page near the end. His pen was positioned at it, steady as the air around us grew a little tenser.

"What's a matter?" Al jeered, suddenly behind him and peering over his shoulder. Ed turned, trying to hide the sketchbook. "Afraid you're not really that good?"

"S-Shut up! I'm trying to figure out what to draw!"

"Hmmm..." Al looked around. "Well, I don't see any malnourished cats around..." He suddenly looked to me and pointed. My heart fell.

"Draw her?" Ed repeated, pen teetering in between his teeth. I failed to fight back a blush, remembering how it was in _my_ mouth as well.

Ed turned away and looked towards the sky, irritated. "Nah, I wouldn't be able to!" he said. He suddenly looked at me again, embarrassed as he reached to take the pen out of his mouth. His expression turned worried. "Not-Not that you wouldn't be a good subject of course!" he told me. "I just... Wouldn't be able to capture you, is all."

A blush came to his face as he realized his own words. Al leaned forward and Ed drew his face away from his brother.

"You mean you really _couldn't_ draw her?" Al asked, challenging him again.

"I... I didn't say that!" Ed yelled back.

"Then do it!" Al said, crossing his arms. "Prove me wrong!"

Ed sighed. "Fine..." To my surprise, he turned himself around with an exaggerated swing of the foot. "But after we get to the hotel. If I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna do it right."

I failed to keep the heat rising from my face again, watching Al walk behind his brother with a snicker. I smiled, falling into step behind them.

Maybe this wouldn't be so bad...


	4. Capturing It

I kept my face turned to the side, staring at the same spot as before. The corner of the window, where the frame met the beginning of the curtains.

"Is this good?" I asked, my eyes looking in Ed's direction.

"Yeah, good enough, I guess." The alchemist grumbled. I smiled, and instantly heard his voice again. "Yeah, stay like that!"

I held my confusion away from my face, continuing to keep the same smile. I hoped this wouldn't take him very long. I could hear his pen making small strokes against the paper. The sound was almost comforting...

Al giggled a little from his spot on the kitchen's bar stool. To my surprise, Ed ignored him, continuing to focus. I wish I could see his face, or respond to Al... I could only keep staring at this one side of the room, this corner of the window... The darkness visible from the window wasn't really helping. Memories started flashing, a tightness slowly constricting my chest. I tried to breathe, and soon enough the smile dropped from my face.

The movements of Ed's pen stopped.

"Something wrong?" he asked me softly.

I did the worst thing a model could do; I broke my position, looking down. "Um, yeah." I tried to smile at him. "Can we take a break for a few minutes? My neck is getting a little sore."

Ed nodded. "Sure."

I tried to smile again in response, the expression faltering almost immediately. "Sorry." I raised a hand to the back of my head, smiling at my own foolishness this time.

"Don't worry about it." Ed told me. He looked away, stare going to the coffee table between us. We were separated between the table lengthwise; him sitting on an arm chair and myself taking up a small part of the loveseat.

"There's a menu for room service." Ed continued, bringing my stare to the piece of paper on the table. "If you're hungry."

"Oh, no." The words were automatic, conflicting the ache in my stomach. "I couldn't intrude like that!" My stomach, however, had to speak for itself; it growled loudly, the sound spiraling down and leaving me embarrassed.

Ed just grinned. "Dinner's on me then!"

* * *

I looked up from my bowl of noodles, stare traveling to Al, who was still sitting by the kitchen.

"Aren't you going to have something to eat, Al?" I asked him. "There's so much food here..."

"Oh, no!" Al held up one of the hands that was in his lap. "I can't eat, actually! I'm doing some very intense Alchemy training. Fasting's part of it!"

I vaguely caught the alarm in Ed's face drop away. He turned back to the chicken thigh in his hand, ripping a part of it into his mouth. I looked back down to my ramen, pushing the noodles around with my chopsticks. I laughed for a moment, pinching the sticks together and apart. "These things sure are strange! I read this is a dish that came from Xing."

"Yeah," Ed replied, leaning back, "Somewhere from the East side."

"I've always been fascinated with that country." My sticks picked up a few noodles, holding them away from the broth they were in. "Always wanted to go."

I looked up from my bowl, noticing Ed giving me that smile again. The small one I couldn't read... He looked down, eyes closing for a moment as he tossed the now meatless chicken wing. The bone landed on top of all the other ones he had stripped bare.

"Let me know when you're done eating." he said, putting his head back and keeping his feet on the coffee table. He relaxed a bit deeper into the chair, getting comfortable. "I'll finish that drawing..."

I smiled, wanting to tell him that we didn't have to keep going. But the sketch was important to him, for whatever competitive reasons he had. I turned back to my noodles, guiding them through my lips as quietly as I could.

* * *

"Al? Adjust her hair, would you?"

"Right." Al stepped forward, guiding a strand until it fell over my shoulder, draping past my chest and curling in front of my stomach. My hair was mostly straight, until the very tips. Then they looped in nearly full circles. It used to drive me nuts, the look of it... I'd prefer to have my hair completely straight if I could; more manageable, less noticeable...

"Perfect." Ed responded, focusing on his drawing again. I felt my fatigue reach beneath my eyes. What time was it?

I forced the question away, keeping my eyes wide. Ed kept sketching, the strokes of his pen becoming a little bit longer. Drawing my hair now, probably. I was glad the pen was more or less the right color, if not a little midnight blue. My hair was more obsidian, but I guess I couldn't change the ink Ed was using now.

I smiled a little more to myself. When was the last time I had been this interested in art?

 _Before he left._ The thought wiped the smile off my face. Ed noticed again. He called my name softly, a wave of concern inside that single word.

I picked my lips up again, moving them into that same smile. I was fine; no need to worry, Ed.

I felt his stare on me before his eyes dropped away. He kept sketching, and once again I fell into the comfort of the sound. I didn't focus much on the act of drawing itself, but more so of the fact that he was doing it. Drawing with his human hand; his left one. I couldn't help but think of his automail. Wondering how hard that must be for him. To lose a body part like that...

I kept myself inside my own head until I noticed the sound of the pen had stopped. I resisted the urge to turn and look, instead waiting until Ed's tired voice reached my ears.

"I think it's done..."

I moved my head, feeling the muscles in my neck protest. "You're finished?"

He nodded, still focusing on the sketchbook in his lap. He held the pen between two fingers near his face, expression focused. I recognized it well; he wasn't sure what to make of his own work.

Al got up from his spot near me, quickly walking over to look behind his brother's shoulder. The teen in the suit bent down, and I couldn't help but notice their differences in size and width. I mean, Ed wasn't exactly very short, but Al was just BIG. How could a younger brother be so much bigger?

"Wow..." Al's voice echoed from inside his suit. "Brother, it's..."

Ed placed the pen in between his teeth, scowling at the drawing. "Still not good enough!" he finished.

Al retracted his head back, surprised. "What're you saying? It's amazing!"

Ed shook his head, hand going towards the page as if he was going to rip it out. "I didn't capture her right—"

Al caught his wrist, his reply flustered. "No! It's perfect, what are you talking about?"

"What are YOU talking about?" Ed echoed back, irritated as he looked to his brother. "I totally got her face wrong!"

"It looks fine!" Al turned to me, calling my name. "This drawing looks great, right?"

I stood up, feeling my knees ache a little. My left one, especially, since it had been supporting the other leg crossed on top of it. Ed saw the light flash of discomfort in my face, a tinge of guilt reaching his mouth. Curving it down.

"I'm alright." I assured him with a smile. He didn't smile back, instead turning down to the drawing as I came to stand beside him.

Cautiously, his hand tilted, shifting enough so I could see his work. I stared, not even blinking. This surpassed even some of my best sketches when I was at my peak. The details, the shading, the proportions... He'd captured everything just right!

The portrait was suddenly turned away from me. Ed's hand had grabbed the base of the paper, and terror shrieked through me as he began tearing the page out. "Still not good enough."

"No, Ed!" I caught his hand with both of mine, feeling his body tense. "It's perfect! I couldn't even draw something this good."

Ed didn't respond. I looked behind myself, seeing him stare at the drawing. The focus that was in his eyes; that determination. Something in my stomach turned, an excited chill fluttering through.

His golden eyes flicked up, meeting my dark ones. His stare came back to the drawing every now and then, comparing real life to his art. After a few minutes, he shook his head.

"I still didn't capture it right."

Al and I both sighed. I shifted, sitting on the front edge of the arm chair. My legs remained crossed as I stretched them out, extending the muscles I had kept in pose for so long. My hands were still holding Ed's, and even though this made me a little embarrassed I kept them there. Anything to keep him from tearing up that drawing he had slaved over. That wasn't even a work of art; it was a work of pure _talent_.

"What were you looking to capture?" I asked him, but he just shook his head.

I squeezed his hand, gently making my hold a little firmer. "Please don't rip it up." I told him. "No artist likes their own art, trust me."

"Yeah." he tsked quietly, and I could sense the extra words in his head. Things he wasn't saying.

"You... You can keep trying..." I told him. "Until this whole thing is done. If you want to."

"I'm... Not sure I could capture it..." He looked back down at the drawing again, the pointer finger of his left hand between two previous pages.

"It wouldn't hurt to try again." I said, looking at him. "Just promise me you won't tear it up."

He nodded, the determination in his face again. "Promise." he replied quietly.

"Alright, good." I released my hands from his, the warmth leaving me. I stepped away from the armchair, legs still a little stiff as I walked away. My arms stretched as I spoke through my small yawn. "I'm gonna go get some sleep, okay?

"Yeah." Ed responded.

I turned to him, giving a smile he wasn't looking up to see.

"Ed."

Almost like he was forcing himself to, he looked away from the drawing, eyes meeting mine. I smiled a little more, heat tinging my cheeks.

"That drawing's incredible. Don't doubt yourself."

I saw a similar shade of pink touch his own face. He didn't respond right away, blinking once before looking back to my sketchbook.

"Thanks." he got out, stuttering a little. "You're, um, you're a pretty good model."

I raised a hand to the back of my head and tried to evade the compliment with a smile. "Well with so many breaks, it was a surprise you finished at all!"

This time, Ed turned to me, a small smile on his face.

"Don't doubt yourself." he told me.

It was my turn to smile, the blush on my face deepening in color.


	5. Blind

I padded out of the hotel's bedroom, noticing my sketchbook was on the kitchen table. I turned to Ed as he approached me, hands in the pockets of his coat.

"I figured you'd want it back." he told me with a smile.

I gave him a softer one as I replied. "Just until you'd like to draw again."

He just grinned, and I found something about the expression made my heart beat a little quicker. I smiled a bit more, a soft blush rising to my face.

Al's footsteps brought my focus away. I looked towards the noise as the teen in the suit stopped walking, standing on the other side of the kitchen tile, near the front door. He lifted a hand to me in a wave.

"Hey! Good morning!"

"Good morning!" I returned cheerily. "I didn't know you two were such early risers!"

Al hesitated, allowing Ed to fill the silence.

"Not sure if you'd count 9:30 as 'early', but—"

"It's already 9:30?!" My hands found my lips, horror reaching my eyes. "I'm so sorry; why didn't you two wake me up?!"

Ed just shrugged, avoiding my gaze. "You seemed tired after last night so we let you sleep in. No big deal; most people wouldn't like strangers bangin' on their doors this hour anyway."

I relaxed, realizing he had a point. "Well," I began, "I would still like to be awake; we won't be able to spend every single day together."

Ed looked at me, realizing what I said. Part of my mind realized what I just said, too, confirming how temporary this case was. How temporary our interactions were... Our friendships.

 _Will I go back?_ I asked myself. _After this is over?_

My heart plunged at the idea, and soon I saw a piece of paper being offered to me. One gloved hand holding it at the top.

"Here." he said. "Order some breakfast."

Realizing the challenge, I hitched a smirk onto my face, placing my hand on his and lowering the paper a little. "I'm not letting you pay for anything I have."

He grinned. "Let's just see who gets the bill first."

My hand slipped away from his, turning to Al. "Let's go out to eat! There's some restaurants around here, right?"

"That's a great idea!" Al told me. "There's a lot of places here!"

"Great!" My smile suddenly fell. "But... Are you still doing that alchemy fast?"

Al's eyes shrunk. "Uh." He suddenly grew nervous. "Y-yeah. But that doesn't mean I can't watch you guys eat!"

"O-okay." I mean, that was a little weird, and I felt really bad, but...

"It's alright!" Ed chimed in. "I'll eat enough for the both of us, Al!" He shot me a grin. "I'll pay for the bill, too!"

"WILL YOU STOP?!"

* * *

"Did you sleep alright?"

The thought left my mouth as soon as I had it, bringing my stare to Edward. He looked back, then nodded before taking another bite of his breakfast.

"Yeah, sure. Why wouldn't I?"

I blushed, looking down to my food. "Well, you were on the couch, after all." I turned to Alphonse, who sat across from me. "And you were against the _wall_ , Alphonse. That couldn't have been very comfortable…"

Ed waved a hand, dismissing it. "We've slept in worse places." he told me. "Couches and walls are a luxury, trust me."

I laughed a little bit, seeing that slight smile come to his face again. No more than a few minutes had passed by before I suddenly stopped eating, the utensil halfway to my mouth. My eyes locked onto Edward's, watching him stare at me with his hands folded in front of his mouth.

"What?" I asked, lowering my fork a bit. I suddenly recognized the look on his face and dropped my eating utensil. The metal clattered against the rim of the plate. "D-do you want to draw me _now?!_ "

Ed looked down at his empty plate, the expression disappearing. "No; there wouldn't be enough..."

I didn't understand what he was talking about; enough _what?_

I sighed. Al suddenly leaned forward from his place across the circular table, speaking to us both in a whisper.

"Hey, guys... Doesn't the person we're looking for have brown hair and a thick coat?"

"Yeah, that would match the description." Ed replied, leaning back a little to follow his brother's stare. His face suddenly grew alarmed. "T-That's him‼"

I looked behind myself, seeing someone at the counter of the shop. Brown hair, a thick coat with a collar raised enough to cover his mouth. Glasses, too. My stare went down, seeing light reflect off the pocket watch he was flashing to the employee.

"HEY!" Ed stood up, pointing to him. "STOP RIGHT THERE!"

The man turned, sunglasses darkening the sight of his eyes. His eyebrows rose in alarm, and quickly he dashed off. Ed ran after him, Alphonse following. I stopped myself from going as well, remembering the bill on the table. I quickly dug into my bag and pulled out enough money. I slapped it on the table, briefly feeling accomplished before my attention went back to the direction Al and Ed ran off in.

I moved the string of beads acting as the door as I walked through. I stopped, looking around. Nobody was stopping to stare at anything, no signs of a fight anywhere.

Then, I heard an explosion. The ground shook for a second, and my only thought was how I hoped neither Ed nor Al was injured.

I quickly bent down, digging my pen out of my bag and drawing a transmutation circle on the ground. One that sent a small part of the sidewalk I stood on upwards, giving me enough height to see the tops of the smallest buildings.

Another explosion went off, not even a block across from me. It didn't hit anything, though, seeming to have ignited in mid-air.

Ed was transmuting parts of the restaurant's flat rooftop, raising it as platforms for him to land on. He skidded back, the force of the explosion pushing him back and blowing the end of his coat out. The platforms extended with him, breaking off as soon as he passed by. He was grinning, of course, and I felt relieved when I didn't see a single scratch on him.

Al's voice caught my focus, and I saw him below us.

"Watch out!" he told Ed. "Make sure the people below are safe before you do that!"

"Like I would do that before checking!" Ed replied, smug. He looked down to Al, telling him to go make sure I was alright.

I blinked, and as if that was all Ed needed, he turned around, seeing me there. I tried to grin as he yelled at me.

"What the heck are you doing here?! Get down—"

A small bomb was suddenly in front of his face. His eyes went wide, and a massive flash of white covered my vision. The small platform below me crumbled, sweeping away every piece of stability. Distantly, I heard the sound of someone clapping once. A roar of electricity came towards me, solid ground meeting my back and stopping the fall. But the impact came much too early for it to be the actual ground.

I heard Ed calling my name. My vision was still flashing white, colors dancing in between and spotting the vision of my surroundings. I was looking up at the sky, and suddenly Ed came into view. Through my own impaired vision, I saw his eyes were shut tight. His hand was on my face, too, gently tapping and feeling the side of it.

"Are you alright?" he asked me.

I moved my head away a little bit, eyes shutting. "Are YOU alright?"

I heard him grit his teeth, a growl slipping out of him. "I asked you first‼ I can't SEE anything so how am I supposed to know?!"

My vision coming back to me, I sat up and looked to Ed again. His eyes were still closed, and judging from the tension on his face, he was in pain.

"Brother?" Al's voice, shouting at us from below.

"Al?" Ed returned. "That you?"

"Y-Yeah!" The younger Elric brother spoke to me next. "Is he alright?"

I looked back to Ed. His hand was still on my face, and I didn't blame him for wanting to get some kind of reference as to where he was. My hand covered his, holding it tightly.

"Hold on, Ed," I told him, "We'll get you down."

Al made a ramp that led up to Ed's platform, allowing us to guide him down to ground level despite his grumbling protests. He kept his hand in mine as we stepped onto the road again, walking over to the sidewalk as Al deconstructed the platforms.

"How're you feeling?" I asked Ed.

The alchemist just scowled. "That was a flash bomb that went off in my face, wasn't it?"

I thought back, feeling a little guilty as I nodded. I should've stopped it, somehow... I shouldn't have even been there in the first place...

I felt Ed's hold on my hand soften a little and looked up to see his eyes were opening. His expression still clenched, in pain, but I could see those golden irises slowly being revealed again. A half-smile hooked his lips.

"Can't draw you if I can't see anything..." he said.

I almost smiled, too concerned to try and go with the mood he was attempting to lighten.

" _Can_ you see anything?" I asked him quietly, watching his eyes open halfway.

"A little bit." he said. "Shadows, mostly. Everything looks dark."

I muted a sigh against the back of my throat. My stare turned away, and again I felt the guilt resurface.

"Sorry." I said. "If I hadn't been there..."

Ed squeezed my hand a little tighter, silencing me. I looked back, seeing his eyes completely open. But they looked unfocused, like they still weren't seeing anything...

Al jogged up to us, and I watched Ed's head perk up before I turned towards the younger Elric myself. I couldn't see Al's face, but I knew it was one of worry.

"Is it any better?" he asked.

I turned to Edward, waiting for his answer.

He grinned again, the same small one as before. "Nothin' I can't handle! I'll be back in no time, Al, just you wait!"

Al wasn't buying the optimism. "So... You still can't see?"

Ed's smile dropped. I felt his hold on my hand tighten. "Um... Well... Not—not really. Not yet, anyway."

I wanted to say something, tell him how it should be coming back any time now. But I wasn't sure; I had no idea. The bomb had been _right_ in front of him...

The tiniest of raindrops landed against my hair. I glanced up, enough to see the grey clouds above us, as Ed looked up as well. But I knew his sight was much different than mine.

I heard a quiet grin stretch his mouth.

"This just isn't my day, is it?"

Before either Al or I could respond, Ed turned, carefully walking along the sidewalk. He pulled me with him, not letting go of my hand as he spoke.

"C'mon, Al. We should get you out of the rain before you rust."

Al nodded quickly. "Uh-right!"

I heard his footsteps behind us, the canopies from the shops we passed by serving as temporary umbrellas. One of these sun visors must have gotten too full with the quickly pouring rain, because as soon as we reached the edge, a massive slush of rain fell, dumping onto Ed. He just sighed, doing nothing to dry himself off.

"Guess we're heading back to the hotel." he said. "Not much we can do in this weather, I guess."

 _Not much we can do without your sight._ I wanted to say.

I looked to him again, now drenched _and_ blind. I reached my other hand out, the one that wasn't holding his, and playfully shuffled my fingers through the front of his hair.

"I wish I knew how to warm you up! You only had to clap your hands to get the water off me!"

Ed grinned a little. "It's not too hard to do! Just converting the water molecules into steam—pretty simple stuff, actually."

"I think there was a fireplace in our room." Al said. "That's always an option."

"Huh? Oh yeah." Ed grinned a bit wider, and I noticed the blush running along his face. "That'd work."

I smiled, almost fascinated with his optimism. He wasn't letting himself get down about what happened...

 _Or he's just not showing it._

"There's something we can do for your sight, right?" I asked, trying to match his go-lucky attitude.

When both Ed and Al went quiet, my mood fell once again.

"Maybe." Ed replied softly. "Let's just hope it takes some time for my eyes to heal again, yeah?"

"Yeah." I answered with a nod.

I wasn't sure how vision impairment and flash bombs worked, but I was pretty sure the effects from that close... No; what was I saying? There had to be a way. His sight would be restored, in time.

Ed's hand held mine a little tighter, a softness in the gesture despite it being his metal hand. I smiled even though he couldn't see it. I hoped one day soon, he'd be able to...

"At least my automail's not broken!" Ed exclaimed. "Winry would kill me!"

Al gave something close to a chuckle, I just stared at Ed.

"She gets really angry when you break it?"

Ed nodded. His other hand rose to the back of his head, as if feeling a wound I couldn't see. "You wouldn't believe how many wrenches I've been hit with over the years. She throws them like javelins sometimes; always hits the mark, too, no matter how far away I am!"

I smiled a little bit, ignoring the feeling I got in my gut. He was still trying to keep the mood light, even after all this... I had to admire that strength.

"Sounds like you go there a lot." I told him.

He turned to me, eyebrows raised in surprise. His eyes didn't glance exactly at me, instead staring somewhere off to the side before he shrugged, turning ahead of himself again.

"It's actually been a while. Haven't really been doing much fighting lately."

I wanted to ask what they _had_ been doing, but my attention was taken as I saw we were approaching the hotel. I held Ed's hand a little tighter.

"Let's get you warmed up."

* * *

"It's getting better."

I looked over my shoulder at Edward, momentarily stopping my tending of the fire. I smiled, wondering if his sight really was improving as my focus went back to the fireplace.

"That's good." I said.

"I can see the red of the fire." Ed continued from his place on the couch. "But everything else is still pretty dark."

I nodded. Putting the poker down, I got to my feet again, watching Ed's head turn at the sound of my footsteps as I made my way towards him. I sat down beside him, resisting the urge to hold his hand again. I kept my hands together in my lap, looking down at them as I spoke.

"I'm glad it's getting better." I said. A weak smile played upon my lips. "I was getting so worried."

I heard a grin hook onto Ed's mouth before feeling his arms drape around the back of the couch. Near the edge. He crossed his legs also, one ankle on top of his knee.

"You never have to worry about me. I'm pretty much indestructible!"

A small, irritated groan came from behind us. I looked over my shoulder, seeing Al sitting at the table with narrowed eyes. Ed showed a bit of surprise, grin wavering.

"Oh, hey, Al. Sorry, didn't know you were there. I'm so used to seeing you all the time!"

A joke. He was making _jokes_. I nearly sighed, wondering how long this was going to take, for him to actually show something else. But maybe he couldn't; maybe because Al was here...

 _Do I want to even see it?_ Memories shot back into me, opening a wound that began bleeding in an emotion I hadn't felt in a long time.

Ed called my name. I snapped out of my own thoughts, turning to look into his unfocused eyes.

"You okay?" he asked me.

 _How did he KNOW?_

"Y-yeah!" I squeaked. "Perfectly alright. What made you think otherwise?"

He shrugged. "I dunno. I just felt like there was something wrong."

"Other senses improve when another is lost." Al said. "Maybe you're just getting better at..." His words trailed off, the exact phrase for what it was leaving him.

Ed caught on, nodding a little bit. "Yeah, maybe." His expression grew worried. "I'd still really like to see normally, if I could..."

I held my hands a little tighter, my own worry consuming me. If only I hadn't distracted him...

"Hey, Al." Interested perked Ed's expression. "We paid for that breakfast, right?"

"Uh..." Al began nervously, his eyes shrinking. "Well..."

"I covered it." I told them. "It's alright."

Ed groaned between his clenched teeth, hand automatically finding the wallet in his coat pocket. With clumsy motions, he dug through it, fingers slipping every now and then. Despite my protests, he held more than enough money out. I wasn't about to take it.

"You told me whoever gets the bill first!" I said. "Your words!"

He blinked, and then seemingly out of habit his stare dropped towards the money in his hand. A sheepish grin came to him.

"Shot myself in the foot on that one." he muttered, putting the money back and pocketing the wallet again. "I'll cover it next time."

I huffed an agreement, silently hoping that he'd be able to see by then.

We all sat in silence for a few moments before I noticed Ed's face. His eyes were still open, a growing irritation rising between his brows. His hands clenched, and a moment later he was shouting, squirming a little beside me.

"WHY WON'T MY SIGHT COME BACK?! WE CAN'T SIT AROUND LIKE THIS! THAT GUY WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF US!"

I kept my hand by my mouth, somewhat scared at the outburst but mostly trying to think of what to say. Al and I couldn't go after him on our own, probably because Ed wouldn't let us. And we also couldn't risk anyone getting even more hurt...

"We did get our suspect, though." Al said. "Now it's just a matter of time before we catch him."

"Yeah but he could be cities away by the time we do that." One foot landed against the coffee table, the other one crossing on top of it. "Especially at this pace..."

When neither of us answered, Ed sighed. His voice was soft as he spoke again.

"Sorry, Al... I'm slowing us down again..."

I looked to his younger brother, watching his head lower to the floor.

"It's alright." Al's voice was just as quiet, even with the suit's echoing.

 _Slowing down what?_ I wanted to ask. But I felt as if it was something that didn't concern me. Or perhaps it was just this case... Yeah that was probably it.

The longer I sat on the couch in this silence, the more I started to think. But my mind just kept going back to the memory of seeing Ed with the flash bomb in front of his face. Seeing his face in pain as he tried to find out if _I_ was alright... I forced myself away from the thoughts.

"Do you two want any tea?" I asked, standing up.

Ed's eyebrow lifted in my direction, his hand remaining across his stomach.

"Yeah, sure." His voice sounded dull and the sound of it moved the smile away from my lips.

I forced myself away from sulking, smiling again as I turned to Al.

"Al? What about you?"

The younger Elric looked up. He hesitated for a moment before nodding. I noticed Ed turn in his direction, surprised, as I went towards the kitchen, still trying to keep the mood light.

"Two teas, coming right up!"

I kept my thoughts to myself while I boiled the kettle of water, still trying to figure out a cure for Ed's blindness. But his sight _did_ seem to be coming back; outside, he couldn't see very much, and now he could see the light of the fire. So that counted for something... Didn't it?

I could only hope I was right…

* * *

 **A/N:** Ahh! The plot's about to shift a little bit! I'm so excited for you guys to read the next chapter; I think you'll like it a lot! I'm making a point to update every Tuesday, but 'til then please lemme know what you think with a review!


	6. Red Light

I woke up to the sound of Al gasping.

"Brother!"

There was a glimpse of red light; transmutation-like. Then it faded.

Ed's voice came through the darkness. "What? What is it, Al?"

I stood up, padding to the living room light lamp and flicking it on. "What's going on?"

I looked around the lit room, seeing nothing besides Ed sitting up on the couch. I couldn't see much of his face, only that his eyes were wide and Al was staring at him from his seat against the wall.

"I..." Ed blinked. "I can..." A grin overtook his face and he threw his arms up, falling back onto the couch. "I CAN SEE AGAIN!"

An immense amount of happiness came to me, and I felt tears rise to the edge of my eyes. He could actually see...? I held the edge of the doorframe, watching him put his hands in his hair, laughing from the sheer relief of it all. Al was laughing a little too, and I'm sure if I could see his face, he'd be crying like I was.

Ed breathed out as he sat up, that grin never leaving him. He said my name as he turned to me.

"Let's go celebrate!"

I looked at him, surprised. "What should we do?" I asked. "It's the middle of the night."

"I don't know, let's just do something!" He even threw his arms out to the side like a little kid when he said that. He sighed again, looking at my face. "I gotta say"—he turned, meeting Al's smiling gaze—"It's really great to see you guys again."

Bashfully, his hand went to the back of his head as he grinned at me. "I was getting pretty worried there for a sec'."

"Yeah..." I agreed, suddenly solemn as I leaned against the doorframe. "I was, too." I thought back, wondering what that light was. My stare shifted to Al, thinking if he saw it, too.

"Al..." I began, watching his head turn towards me. "Did you see that light?"

"Yeah," Al nodded, "I did."

Ed blinked at us. "What light? What're you talking about?"

"There was a red light," Al said, "Before you woke up. Like a transmutation."

"Transmutation?" Ed repeated. "That doesn't make any sense... How could I have transmuted..." His expression twisted in confusion. "Transmuted my eyesight back?!"

"What..." His hands were on his hair again as he looked around himself in quick shifts. "How... That doesn't..."  
He sighed, sitting back down again. "I have no clue about any of that. And you said the light was red?"

Al nodded. "Yeah."

"Huh."

Ed got up, rolling off the couch and to his feet in one smooth motion. He popped the front of his coat out, looking at me from over his shoulder.

"So are we celebrating or what?" he asked.

I smiled, feeling a little bit of heat touch my face. "Give me a few minutes to get ready, okay?"

He nodded, one hand in his pocket. He was standing taller now, no longer the beaten defeated posture he'd had before. That strength was back, more than ever. I turned away, heading into my room again with a smile.

* * *

"Here you are, miss."

"Thank you..." I took the glass of champagne, watching as she set down the tray with more glasses and the bottle.

After asking if we needed anything else with our food, the waitress left. I watched her go, feeling a little guilty keeping the restaurant open like this. We came by just as the doors were closing, but one flash of Ed's wallet and they opened again.

I looked down at the champagne in my glass, my mind on the State Alchemist sitting across from me.

"It isn't much of a celebration if you can't drink this..." I told him.

"Hey, give it a few more months." He grinned at me. A sly expression came to him, his stare off to one side. "Of course, it really wouldn't be that fun if we didn't break some rules."

He took one of the glasses that had been placed upside down and turned it right side up. With that same massive grin still on his face, he poured his own drink. From his place beside me, Al just gave a sigh. I looked away from him to see Ed's glass held out to me.

"Cheers." he said. "To a bright future."

I tapped my glass against his, matching his enthusiasm. "Cheers!"

We laughed, and I heard Al join in a little bit too. I was debating on offering him some, considering he was nearly 17 and his older brother was already drinking illegally... But before I could, Alphonse spoke.

"Brother..."

Ed tilted the glass away from his lips, looking to Al. He waited, watching his brother look away.

"Don't you think it's strange?" Al continued. "If there was a transmutation... Then there isn't any sign of equivalent exchange..."

Ed grew solemn, considering what his brother had said. He set his glass back on the table, fist resting against the side of his face.

"I'm not sure, Al..." he answered. "You both say you saw that light, and I don't doubt your experiences..." His brows knotted together, and I sensed the frustration behind them. "I just don't know. Maybe something else caused that light. A transmutation doesn't make any sense."

He looked down, further away from me. "Especially not one without equivalent exchange."

There was something going between them, Ed and Al. Some idea floating around. Al lifted his head, speaking quietly.

"Do you think...?"

"It still doesn't make any sense!" Ed's voice rose, causing a few stares to move our way.

"Maybe..." Al's eyes went wide, his focus going in front of him. "Maybe it's something to do with The Truth..."

Ed raised one eyebrow, again listening as Al continued, stare turning to him. "You can make transmutations without a circle, so why can't your body also know what to do to heal severe injuries?"

"That's kind of a leap." Ed commented, raising the glass to his mouth as if he was prepared to take another sip. "I don't remember seeing anything about that, and besides, why would it only work now?"

Al thought hard.

"There... Was something..." he began. "I know there was something about medical alchemy..."

"You mean when you saw it?"

Al nodded. I shook my head, trying to get rid the headache that was now throbbing.

"Can somebody fill me in, please?"

Ed looked to me, surprise catching his expression before he grinned an apology. "It's a long story, I guess." he told me. "It's really nothing to concern yourself with. Probably just a bunch of dead ends, anyway."

Something of an irritated growl came from Alphonse, causing Ed to look back. They exchanged looks, but when Ed turned back, the glare on his face disappeared. He tipped his glass back, swallowing the last bit of champagne.

"Ah, wow, this stuff is good!" he said. "Now I see why it's so dang expensive!"

As he laughed at his own joke, my mind was elsewhere, still trying to figure out how his sight was restored. Al had a good point; something like that happening was really strange, especially when it happened without taking anything in return...

I looked back to Ed, voicing the idea as it began to form in my brain.

"You were sleeping, weren't you?" I asked. "Before it happened?"

Ed nodded, taking another sip of champagne from his second glass.

"What were you dreaming about?"

He nearly choked, leaning forward and suppressing a gag. His face was bright red.

"W-why's that matter?" he asked, avoiding my stare. "I was just sleeping. Completely normal dream! Nothing special about it!" He glanced to me, and for some reason that seemed to set him into even more of a frenzy. "Nobody HERE was in it, that's for sure!"

I blinked. "Um. Okay."

Al was smiling, his eyes perfectly curved in pure amusement. I looked between them again, and my idea suddenly fell away. Maybe there was a connection between thoughts and... Whatever that was. Apparently not.

Ed downed the last of his drink and returned his glass to the table. He blinked a little bit, shaking his head to probably rid the buzz that had set in. "Whatever it was, I think we should just accept it and move on. No use going around in circles now, especially when we got so much on our plate."

"That's right." Al said. "Now that you have your sight back, we can catch that imposter."

"Granted he's not in another continent by now." Ed added with a sigh. "We were so close, too..."

"At least we know what he looks like now!" I said, smiling as best as I could.

Ed's golden stare glanced to me. His posture straightened, mood picking up slightly.

"Yeah, I guess so... Just wish he..." His words suddenly faded. His eyes widened, an expression twisting on his face. An alarm settled in, enough to raise his hair up as he grabbed it.

"PEANUTS!" he said. "THAT'S WHY HE NEEDED THE PEANUTS!"

I jumped a little bit as both of Ed's fists slammed against the table. He was yelling now, but I knew he wasn't yelling directly at me.

"I should've seen it before! Bombs! Nitroglycerin is in PEANUTS!"

I heard Al gasp and my mind clicked together what he was saying.

"This idiot is making a BOMB!" Ed dashed out of his seat before suddenly stumbling to a stop, wallet flashing out.

He spun around and slammed more than enough money on the table, shooting me a mischievous grin. I sighed.

"Is this really a good time—"

"Right!" Ed was out the door leading to the inside of the second floor. "No time! We gotta go!"

I stood up as well, wanting to follow him out before noticing that Al hadn't moved. He continued to sit at his place beside me, his eyes becoming slits as he sighed.

"I wonder how long it'll take for him to realize the trains don't run this late at night."

Hearing footsteps below us, I looked over the balcony, watching Ed run out of the restaurant and down the sidewalk.

"C'mon!" he yelled back at us. "What're you guys doing?! Just hurry up‼"

When neither of us responded, he finally turned around, almost bumping into someone as he skidded back on one foot. His angry expression suddenly fled upon seeing my disheartened one. I watched something of an idea dawn onto his face. He flipped his pocket watch open. His jaw dropped, and his hands rose to his hair as he stomped around.

"Damn it‼"

I heard Al giggle behind me.

"It's a good thing you're here!" he told me. "He might've been all the way to the station before he realized the time."

I smiled a little. But that still didn't change the situation we were in. How were we going to stop this?

I kept myself in thought as I moved passed the table, trying to ignore the stack of money next to the bottle of champagne. I heard Al walk behind me as we made our way through the double doors, seeing a few people stop eating from the corner of my eye. I looked up, noticing their stare was on the person behind me.

I smiled, turning to look at Al from behind my shoulder.

"You probably get these a lot, don't you?"

His eyes curved in another smile, a tiny laugh coming to him. "A bit..."

I expected him to expand on that statement, but he remained quiet until we were back downstairs and walking through the entrance again. Ed was waiting for us close by, glowering to himself.

I wanted to get that expression off his face; it just reminded me of when he was blind...

Stepping forward, I spoke, catching his attention.

"So what do we do?"

Ed sighed, hand stretching one eyelid downward. "I don't even know." he replied. "Who the hell knows where this guy is, and I doubt contacting a specific branch about some guy in a thick jacket with brown hair and sunglasses is really going to help."

I looked down, trying to think of something. But he was right... What do we do?

A loud, ground-shaking explosion answered me.


	7. Revealed, Part I

**A/N** : Hi there! Please note the rating change! This is the first rated M chapter, but for now the rating is just to be safe for some blood/violence/gore.

Without further ado, here's the seventh chapter!

* * *

I was running with them, but I still felt like every cell in my body was trying to pull me _back_ in the opposite direction. Nobody was saying anything about me still being here—I wasn't even sure if I should hang back or not. But Ed's sight would probably be restored, even if he was blinded again...

I stopped running just as we approached our destination. _Dammit!_

I looked up, seeing the flames roaring above us. The building had been blown up... A church, of all things...

A silhouette caught my focus; a shadowed figure beside the burning rooftop, someone quickly jumping away!

Ed was bounding off after them, shouting back at us to take care of the fire. We nodded our agreement before I heard the sound of clapping behind me.

I turned around, looking to see a giant water hose—something that kind of looked like a cannon—beside the street's fire extinguisher. Al stood up, aiming the water as it shot out.

The fire began to sizzle in response, the sound background noise as Al spoke to me.

"I'm going to go see if there anyone stuck inside! Can you take care of the fire?"

I nodded, switching places with him as he ran off and disappeared inside the building, ignoring the shouts the crowd gave for him to stop.

I grabbed the handles Al was using to aim this massive thing, immediately feeling the weight hoist me up. My legs kicked in the air, and I felt someone help pull me down.

"Thank you." I smiled nervously, watching the man just nod.

"I can take care of this!" he told me.

Feeling absolutely useless, I let go of the handles and stepped to the side, watching this stranger take over the only job I was assigned. People cheered as the flames started to weaken, overpowered by the massive amount of water.

Another bomb went off, not even a block away. My heart dropped; that's the same direction Ed ran off to!

I didn't even think as I started running towards the cloud of smoke visible from one of the windows... Nothing seemed to be blown out; no windows or doors.

Again, my thoughts went to the instincts trying to force me back. Just wait, it was telling me. Just don't get in the way...

 _Another_ bomb went off, and this time I felt the shocks ripple the ground below my feet. I stumbled, not falling. The earth settled back to normal, and I burst through the already open door.

An empty living room greeted me. But I heard the sounds of a rough scuffle downstairs; like someone was being dragged along a table, knocking off glass and breaking it on the floor.

I soon found the stairs to the basement, and by then Ed's voice came to my ears. Talking to whoever he was fighting. He didn't sound hurt; in fact, he sounded completely cocky.

"What're you gonna do now?" he taunted. "I can escape your stupid little bombs all night, pal. No sweat."

Oh, no... Please don't provoke him, Ed...

The stairs ended, bringing me down to a dimly lit basement. A slick voice rang out as I stopped running, the last of my steps echoing against the concrete.

"Well, it seems we have another visitor."

I saw the shorter of the two figures turn towards me, a familiar voice saying my name.

Ed suddenly leaned back, dodging a bomb as it was thrown at him. I hid my eyes with the inside of my jacket, seeing Ed turn away as a blinding white light came.

"Oh, no." Ed's voice again, the grin clear. "No way in hell I'm falling for that one again."

Before my own sight had even adjusted back, Ed was in front of the bomber, jumping high and spinning. The back of his heel connected with the bomber's head, earning a groan and a harsh stumble.

"Damn midget..."

"WHO YOU CALLIN'—"

Al's footsteps came thundering down the stairs behind me. "Brother!"

I stepped off to the side, watching the teen in the armor stop at the base of the stairs.

The bomber was on his knees, one of Ed's hands clutching his hair while his metal hand was transmuted into what looked like a giant fist.

Ed blinked. "Oh, hey, Al."

The bomber took the opportunity to break Ed's grip with a quick strike against his forearm. They broke apart, jumping a good distance away from each other. Ed clapped his hands, bringing his human one against the back of his transmuted fist. The length of his arm returned, the material finding its original place. He clenched his hand a few times, grin returning. He opened his mouth to say something, but quickly the smile fell from his face. The bomber's voice rang out again.

"And now four makes a party!" Bombs were suddenly in his hands, lit with the fuse disappearing fast. "Can I interest anyone in some candles?"

Ed and Al clapped, putting their hands to the floor. The ceiling above us split down the middle, curving upwards and creating a wide open space. Al's transmutation light sped along the ground, a block shooting out from the floor and knocking the bombs high into the air.

They exploded, the burst of wind whipping against us, the flames bright enough for our eyes to be shielded again.

When everything cleared, the street lamps above were bright enough to shine down, illuminating the basement. I stared at Ed, seeing the left leg of his pants had been torn away. His leg... It was completely metal...

He wore a frown, continuing to stare at the bomber.

"Y'know, I really hate it when people try and blow up friends and family. Kinda puts a downer on everything."

"I had a feeling it was you!" the bomber laughed, pointing at Ed. "I didn't think I could _really_ be fighting the famed Fullmetal Alchemist—but here you are! Golden features and all!" He laughed again, and the sound was horribly insane. "Tell me, Fullmetal, how is it that you two can perform alchemy with needing circles?! Is it as simple as making one with your hands?"

Ed grinned, the expression mischievous. "Nah. The truth is a lot more complex than that, bud."

His leg slid back into a low fighting stance, automail catching the street light again. His hands rose, the metal one extended in front of him while his human hand rested in defense by his jaw. "C'mon. Let's finish this."

The man just smiled, barring his teeth as he raised one arm out. For a moment, it looked as if his nails were growing, but with the amount of blood coming out of his fingers, I knew I was wrong.

"He's..." I could hardly speak through my own shock. "He's transmuting his BONES?!"

The man swiped his hand across himself, the long bones that were once his fingers acting like massive claws.

Ed just gave a cocky grin, suddenly standing normal with his hand on his hip. "Yeah," he scoffed, "Not gonna size up to my past fights, trust me."

The bomber gave another huge grin. "You really want to talk about 'sizing up'?"

"THAT'S IT!" Ed was charging forward, transmuting a blade onto his metal arm. "THAT'S THE LAST JOKE YOU'RE GONNA MAKE!"

The bomber just grinned, running forward as well. His hand swiped out and Ed jumped, the end of his coat getting ripped up by the makeshift claws. He stepped on the guy's face, and I heard the crack of a nose breaking.

The bomber fell onto his back as Ed landed in front of him. The alchemist turned around, one hand in his pocket as he looked down.

"I thought that was almost gonna be hard for a second."

A grin hooked onto the bomber's mouth. He suddenly flipped onto his feet, acrobatically landing a good distance away from Ed. Without moving his hands, the criminal set his nose back into place. Transmuted the bones into the right areas again.

I felt the hair on my head stand straight up as Ed's face dropped into an expression of disgust.

 _"Ew!_ " he drawled, closing his eyes. "Stop doing that!"

"No way." The claws rose in front of him again, the blood still on his bones flinging off and landing on the floor. "I've worked way too hard to get this transmutation right. Seals up my skin just enough so I won't lose any blood."

"It'll still wreck your body..." Ed began, but the bomber just grinned.

"Like you have the right to say that, _Fullmetal_?"

"Shut your mouth!" Ed was charging forward again, incredibly ticked.

When Ed got close enough, something narrow and thin sped out of the bomber's torso. A rib. I saw his upper body drop a bit to the left, compensating for the bone length he was using. Ed blocked the makeshift spear to his stomach, using the blade on his arm as a shield.

The rib shot back just as quickly as it had come. Ed slashed, but the attack was dodged with a quick bend backwards. The bomber's palms came into view, and I saw the complex series of alchemy circles tattooed into his skin. My stomach squeezed itself; the circles were enough to continually transmute his bones...

The front of the bomber's shoes were ripped open, toes attempting to stab Ed. It was meant to be a quick attack; something fierce as the bomber transferred his weight onto his hands in a backbend, supporting himself as the bones in his leg got shorter.

Ed put his arm and knee up, again using the metal to deflect the long toes.

"You wanna give me a hand here, Al?"

"Right!"

Al clapped his hands, transmuting part of the ground into a reaching hand. The bomber flipped away from the structure, jumping onto and away from the wall as he landed against it.

As he landed onto the floor again, Al and Ed stared in disbelief.

"What is this guy, in the circus?" Ed asked.

In the next moment, claws made of bone were slashing at Al. The teen in the suit stepped back, hands up and blocking but not attacking. It was only a moment after he had circled around, allowing me to see the back of the bomber and the front of Al, that the bomber's other hand had transformed into claws as well. He slashed twice; a fake to Al's legs and a direct hit against his head.

Al's helmet flew off, and I felt something of a relief that he was wearing one. That could've been really bad…

The helmet bounced to the floor, but didn't reveal the head of the younger Elric. I waited, expecting Al's head to pop out, maybe have his hands holding onto the edge. Just some kid inside a giant suit of armor. But nothing came out, and I suppressed making any sound as the suit leaned forward, pointing to the inside of his body.

A blood red insignia. I recognized the rune instantly, but still my brain couldn't register the significance... There was no way...

"You'll have to try harder than _that_." Al's voice rang out, filling the empty suit.

My stomach lurched, my perception of the younger Elric completely being re-written. He'd been empty. He'd been empty this whole time…

Now at a safe distance away from Al, who was twisting his head back on, the bomber was yelling.

"You fools actually tried to do it! I can't believe there's people out there SO STUPID!" Laughter rang out from him—true, genuine amusement. "It's taboo for a reason! How evolved we've become! How very—"

Ed's foot slammed against his face, cutting off his speech. The Elric didn't stop there; he landed low on the ground, pivoting and ramming the side of his leg against the bomber's knee. The limb broke at the brute force of the metal, and I grew nauseous for the second time as I saw the upper half of his leg shift away from his lower. Ed stood up, grabbing the guy's head as he yelled.

"I'm really not feeling like a lecture today, _pal!_ " His metal knee punctuated his words, slamming hard against the side of the villain's head.

"Brother!" A concerned warning from Al.

As the bomber skidded against the ground face-first, Ed looked in the direction of his brother.

The older Elric waved a hand. "Ah, he's fine. He's transmuting his bones after all. Probably lessened the impact of my leg."

I looked back to the villain. He still wasn't moving. At this point, I saw fear in Edward's face. Alphonse ran up to the body, about to crouch down when Edward's mind came back to him. The realization triggered for me as well.

Ed reached forward, as if that could stop his brother's movements.

"AL, NO!"

"Al, don't do it!"

The sharp bone of a finger pierced through the front plate of Al's suit. I stopped breathing, hand half-raised in a pathetic attempt to reach him.

"Al..." Ed fell to his knees, hitting the ground hard. I've never seen his eyes that helpless. That empty.

The figure on the floor moved its head, picking himself up a little bit. I could _feel_ the grin on his face; a ghost imprint against my sick stomach.

Al was gone. And I couldn't even take a step to save him.

The familiar shifting of metal sounded. I looked up, breath leaving my lungs for the second time. With a grin coming to my face, I watched Al move his arm, hand gripping the bone still impaling him.

"I can't believe you _missed!_ " Al's voice, ringing clear out of his suit. "How could you _miss_ when I'm this close to you?!"

Before a response could be heard, Al tilted his hand upwards, snapping the bone in two.

The alchemist on the floor screamed, and my mind quickly came back to me. I tapped the back of my heel onto the floor, sliding open the compartment beneath my shoe. I pressed the transmutation circled engraved there to the floor, watching the carbon in the concrete below the bomber give way. A hole was formed, some of it moving over to bury the alchemist, covering everything except for his eyes and lips. I gave him enough room to breathe, but he wouldn't be able to pierce through such thick flooring.

"Hey, nice work!" Ed complimented me, sending a grin my way as he walked over to the bomber.

I smiled back, a little embarrassed. It'd been a long time since I'd used alchemy, especially in a way that was used for offense. I was surprised I could still conduct something like that…

Ed crouched down, hands hanging from his knees as he looked at the bomber. He stared from the corner of his eyes, mouth in a frown.

"Alright, let's get this over with. What's up with impersonating a dog of the military? Why'd you bomb that church?"

A single, barking laugh answered him. "Like I would tell YOU!" The man spit upwards, trying to hit Ed but missing. Still, Ed leaned away with a slight grimace.

"Well, you better start talkin'." Ed replied. "You really wanna be cooped up in there until the cops come?"

"Ha!"

Ed frowned and kept trying to get more info. "Is there anyone else working with you?"

"Now THERE'S a real laugh!" The bomber cackled madly, wiggling around in the limited room I had given him. "Do you really think I'm the type to work with someone? If I was, there would definitely be more of those churches on fire around the world!"

"Gosh, you're insane..." Al muttered.

Wide eyes went in the direction of the younger Elric. "Oh, don't act like you don't understand! You're an alchemist, after all! In fact, everyone in this ROOM is one! We're free-thinkers, followers of science and common sense! Tell me; honestly, truthfully tell me that you've never thought of destroying one of those blasted God-spewing CORPORATIONS!"

We were all stunned into silence. Al was right, but personally I didn't think that "insane" really covered it right now. Ed was the first to recover, tsking as he turned away.

"Yeah, believe me, I've heard that all before. But just because you believe someone else is wrong doesn't mean you should try to blow them up!"

"Try?! I did much more than _try_ , Fullmetal Alchemist!"

Ed slammed his hand against the ground, near the bomber's face. "ALRIGHT, that's enough! I'm tired of this! Tell me what I need to know!"

A wide grin filled the space I had left for the bomber's mouth.

"No..."

The smile fled as Ed pressed the tip of his automail blade in between the bomber's eyes.

"You've heard about me, _right?_ " There was an edge to Edward's voice; a lowness I didn't recognize.

The bomber tried to wiggle around, keeping his eyes frantically wide. "Y-yes! I've heard you've slain many many people!"

I saw Alphonse give a sound of disbelief; embarrassment almost. I realized this guy must have his information wrong. Ed kept his cut throat attitude, giving one nod with that horrible look in his eyes.

"That's right." The blade pressed a bit more, and I saw a drop of blood form, slipping down into the corner of the bomber's eye. A whimper came as he closed his eyes, preventing the blood from getting inside. "You wanna be my next victim?"

I heard a slight whimper come from Al, who had his hands in front of him, toying with his fingers a little bit. The bomber just kept breathing in that same fast way, and his eyes suddenly shot open.

"OKAY! OKAY, I'LL TELL YOU EVERYTHING!"

"Lautoxan police!"

I looked up, seeing shadows surrounding the upper floor above us. Guns were drawn. That characteristically big grin came to Ed as he stood up and stepped away.

"What's with that look?" he asked me, clapping his hands and putting one of them on his blade, reverting his metal hand back to normal... But there was something off about the transmutation. "You really didn't think I was gonna kill the guy, did you?"

I didn't answer; had I actually seen that right? The transmutation light looked... A little red.

"Ed..." I began as the police came thundering down the staircase behind me. I stepped off to the side with a quick glance, moving out of their way.

They started towards the bomber, who was still in the ground.

"Oh, sorry." I activated the transmutation circle on the bottom of my shoe, releasing the ground on top of the criminal. The police captured the guy instantly, roughly hoisting him up by the arms.

"Hey watch it!"

He was carried off, and I watched one police officer step towards Edward, asking him something. The State Alchemist shook his head, hand retrieving his silver watch as he explained the situation. The officer accepted the story pretty easily, and after a few brief questions to me and Alphonse, he left. The three of us were alone.

"Al!" Ed had his hands in the air, arms swinging angrily. "What'd you do that for? Waiting so long to grab the bone? WE THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD!"

Al's eyes retracted, growing smaller. "I was surprised by it too! I didn't think he could have possibly missed like that, honest!"

Ed sighed, bowing from the force of his relief. He straightened, stretching out his lower back. "Well, whatever. It's nice to have you alive still."

I heard Alphonse call my name. I looked over, seeing him bow a little towards me.

"We're sorry we didn't tell you." he began, that small voice ringing out from his empty suit. "We thought it would be best, to hide the consequences of what we'd done."

I looked away, thinking back. Memories came, and I allowed them to speak for me. "I found out about Ed's arm when we were on the train to Central," My eyes glanced up, seeing his light surprise before watching him nod a bit to himself, understanding, "And... When I found out about..." I wanted to continue; Trisha's face was just too painful to remember now. I wanted to tell them how much it hurt, seeing them like this. Like they were now.

Tears escaped my eyes and I roughly wiped them away on my palms, forcing myself to continue. "I had no idea you had lost so much. A full body, and half of another one." My fingers threaded into my hair, and through another wave of tears, I finally looked at them both. "How is that equivalent?"

Ed shifted his weight, the soft click of his leg ringing into the silence. He kept his stare down, kept his hands in his pockets, and finally began to speak.

"I sacrificed my leg in the process of the transmutation." he began. "And I gave my arm to get Al into that suit of armor." With closed eyes, he shook his head. "I don't know if you'd still call that equivalent, but maybe it's just our punishment for trying to play God."

He looked up, stare meeting mine. "Either way, this is our burden to bear. We've chosen this path, and we can't turn back from it."

There was something underneath those words. I wanted to ask...

"If you ever go back to Resembool," he began, raising his hand to the back of his hair, "You'll see the remains of our house. We burned it down a long while back. A symbol of our resolve to never look into the past again."

Memories came to me like rainfall. They'd burned down their house? Everything?!

I knew I really couldn't be angry... If I had that courage... I'd burn down mine, too... But I couldn't. I wouldn't be able to. I was miles away from that place, and even now it was still trapping me.

 _I'm such a coward..._

Ed called my name and I looked up. He was staring at me, a softness in his dirtied face.

"We're sorry." he said, repeating his brother's words. "I don't think we can say that enough, with all the ways we've hid you in the dark like this."

"I know why you did it." I responded. "I know why..." _I just wish you hadn't._

He suppressed a sigh, his shoulders lowering a little bit more. His weight shifted, balancing equally again as he looked up. I followed his stare, seeing the night sky; the aftereffects of the bomb being forced into the air and blowing up most of the house. The street lights were casting a yellow glow onto everything. My mind went back to Alphonse, and I found everything began to make sense. All that strange behavior from before...

Ed looked ahead of himself again, towards me, and I saw that soft smile on his face.

"Don't look so worried." he told me, eyes nearly laughing in happiness. "It's alright. We've been livin' like this for a while now; it's second nature sometimes."

I realized my knuckles had come to rest against my mouth, but I didn't move them away. I _kept_ worrying, even though that happiness on his face was constantly telling me not to.

Eventually, Ed's mouth dropped into a pointy frown. Then he relaxed, sighing.

He shrugged one shoulder; his metal one. "I don't know what to say," he told me, "I wish I could tell you we have a way to get our bodies back... Some—" He laughed, the sound brief and harsh, "— _goal_ we've been searching for. But right now, we really don't."

"What're you talking about?" I asked softly.

Ed seemed to be thinking, but then he shook his head. "It'd take too long to explain." he replied. A soft, nearly ironic smile hooked his mouth. "Just another recap of more failures from yours truly."

Al didn't seem to mind him not telling me, even though they had just been apologizing for keeping me in the dark... I didn't press, though... I didn't want to, if it was something bad enough to keep them so quiet.

Ed walked forward, still standing tall as he started passed me.

"Well, guess there's nothing left to do but head to Central in the morning and file a report..."

"Hey."

We looked up, seeing an office peer down from the first floor. He kept talking.

"If you're lookin' to head to Central, there's an express train runnin' every quarter hour. Fairly new system they're tryin' out; just got opened a few days ago!"

"That's perfect!" Al exclaimed. "Thank you!"

The officer nodded. "You mind fixin' up this floor in exchange?"

"Uh, yeah. Sure." Ed bent down, clapping his hands again and putting them to the floor. He looked up, grinning to the officer as the floor began to seal again. "Sorry 'bout that!"

The officer just waved, the sight of his hand soon shut out by the basement's ceiling. When the ceiling was connected, that dim light came on, barely illuminating the basement once again. I watched Ed's figure rise up from the ground, hearing the click of his leg as he stood.

He suddenly turned, and I heard the grin come to his face, seeing it a little even with the low lighting.

"We should probably fix up that hole in you, Al."

"Huh?" I heard Al look down at his chest. "Oh, yeah. That'd probably be a good idea!"

Ed laughed a bit, walking over to his brother and stopping in front of him. He clapped his hands. "Here."

His transmutation light was red, the lightning cracking and skittering around the hole in Al's body. Quickly, it faded to the standard light blue, but it was definitely enough to make us all lose our breath.

Ed took his hands away, looking at them. "What the heck just happened?" He looked at his brother. "Al, are you alright?!"

Al nodded, just as worried. "Y-yeah! Are you okay, though?"

I watched Ed clench his hands over and over again, like he was testing out the muscles in his fingers.

"Yeah..." he said. "I feel just fine..."

He grinned at me, embarrassed. "I guess you two weren't kidding when you were talking about that transmutation light being red earlier!"

Al sighed, his body hunching forward. "That's _really_ weird..."

"No kidding." Ed replied, his voice still a bit distant. He raised one hand to his mouth, thought coming into the space between his brows, the creases in his skin visible even in the low lighting. "I wonder..."

He bent down, clapping his hands and putting them on the ground. Blue transmutation light illuminated the room, and through squinted vision I watched his hand rise up, crafting a spear out of the ground. Throughout the entire transmutation, the light remained perfectly normal.

"What the heck?" Ed wined, holding the spear in both hands. "Why didn't it turn red again?!"

We all stared at the spear for a moment, like that would somehow tell us the answer to Ed's question. It didn't, and Al filled the silence with the creaking of his helmet as his head shook.

"I guess whatever it was is gone now..." he began. His stare went down, noticing how half of Ed's left pant leg was gone.

"We should get you fixed up, too, Brother."

It was Ed's turn to look down at himself. "Oh, yeah. Guess I can't really go out walking around like this, can I? Not even if it's this late out."

I could practically feel the grin silently laughing at his own joke as he shifted the spear and rested it against the inside of his arm. He clapped his hands, placing them on the weapon and allowing it to deconstruct back into the floor.

"And now to get me looking normal again..."

He bent down, clapping his hands again and placing them on the floor, bringing more light into the room's only bulb. This brightened our surroundings enough for him and Al to start picking up the torn pieces of Ed's clothing. Most of them had been ripped away in large chunks due to the early explosions before I got there, so it didn't take very long.

I wanted to move and help them. But I only stayed standing by the doorway, only thinking of how much they had lost...

With his clothes fully repaired, Ed was walking towards me again. I looked to him as he passed by, the light from the stairway bright enough for me to catch the glimpse of a smile before he left my line of vision. His hand rose, fingers softly tugging on the shoulder of my jacket before falling away. His words came again, the memory of what he had said just a few minutes ago playing again.

 _"Don't look so worried."_

* * *

 **A/N:** For reference's sake, Ed's around 5'3-5'4" in this fic c:


	8. Ice Cream

**A/N:** Hi everyone!

Just a quick note for those who read the last chapter before the date **8/20/2015** : I've made some changes to that seventh chapter, mainly the bone-transmutation fight scene (added more of an explanation) and an important scene between our three main characters towards the very end, when Al and Ed start to repair each other.

If you haven't done so yet, reading that last scene is _highly recommended._

That's all; enjoy the chapter, and thanks for reading/reviewing!

* * *

To say today had been a long day would definitely be an understatement. The train ride back to Central was short—or at least it felt fairly short. I woke up to the tilted sight of Al smiling at me, hand gently nudging my knee from his seat across from mine. Ed was looking over his shoulder, suitcase in hand as he stood in the aisle, smiling as well.

Definitely long, but I was glad it was almost over.

The Brigadier's office was as big as I expected it to be, but I really didn't think for it to have couches. I was thankful though, trying hard not to fall asleep as I sat down. Al quietly took the armchair as Ed flopped down beside me, arms fanning out to rest along the back.

"Alright," he was saying, "Let's get this stupid lecture over with, Mustang."

I focused, turning to see Mustang raise an eyebrow from his place at his desk. "I'm not scolding you, Fullmetal. You're old enough to know what you did wrong." He moved a paper from the top of a pile, sliding it in front of himself with two fingers. "Which, in this case, wasn't a lot of things."

Ed shot him an irritated look. Mustang just smirked, continuing to speak.

"So tell me about this case." he said. "After you all left for Luxotan, what happened?"

"Well, we started going door-to-door," Ed began, looking to the ceiling, "Seeing if anyone remembered a State Alchemist being there."

Mustang nodded, like he agreed with the action.

"We got a little bit of a lead from that; someone told us what the guy looked like and what he took from their house."

Mustang's thin eyebrows rose. "What he took?" he repeated.

Ed nodded, allowing Al to fill in his reply.

"He was going to every house he could and getting different items from them."

"Using the watch as leverage." Mustang mused. "Okay, go on."

"And then..." Ed suddenly stopped talking, and he looked down, a slight blush coming to him as he scratched the side of his nose. "Uh..."

I realized what he was thinking of; the drawing he did when we stayed at the hotel. I grinned through my own embarrassment, seeing Mustang's gaze lift to me, welcoming an addition.

"And then the next morning, when we were eating breakfast, we saw him."

"The imposter?" Mustang asked.

I nodded, seeing Ed recover and continue on. He leaned forward, arms hanging past his knees.

"And when he ran off, Al and I chased after the bastard." A hand passed along his mouth, an irritation coming to him. "Figured out he was using bombs, too."

My lips shut a little tighter, noticing he was going to skip over the restoration of his sight completely. I only nodded a little bit, hearing him turn to Mustang and keep talking.

"But by the time we had really pieced everything together, he'd already struck an attack on a church."

My hands curled, grabbing handfuls of my skirt. I was glad nobody got hurt, but just seeing that building up in flames like that...

"Nobody was injured," Al chimed in, "But our imposter fled the scene soon after we got there."

"You trailed him, right?" Mustang asked.

"Obviously." Ed replied, kicking his weight back against the couch. "We got some information out of the bastard and the rest is up to the authorities he was handed to."

Mustang nodded. "Was he working with anyone?" he asked. "Any signs of an accomplice?"

Ed shook his head. "No. Basically spat in my face like he was insulted I'd even ask."

Al suddenly turned to me, remembering something.

"Your sketchbook." he said. "You wrote everything down in that, right?"

"Oh." I pulled it out of my bag, holding it in front of me. "Yeah, you're right." I looked to Mustang. "When we went door to door, I wrote down everything that was taken."

Mustang looked down to my sketchbook. His hands dropped from their place in front of his mouth, arms stretching behind his head as he stood up.

"We'll need to keep that for a few days." he yawned. "Crucial evidence."

"Yes, of course." I stood up as well, scooting past Ed as he needlessly pulled his legs in for me.

I approached Mustang as he stood to the side of his desk, waiting for me to hand the book to him. The weight of the sketchbook left my hand again, though unlike the time I handed it to Al, the feeling was... Lighter. Not as dark as it was before.

A blush touched my face as I realized Ed's drawing was still in there. Mustang must have seen something in both Ed and I's faces because his stare was shifting between us.

"Is there something wrong?" he asked.

Suddenly beside me, the alchemist cleared his throat with a fist, smiling as he tried to act casual. "No, nothing!" I saw a bead of sweat on his temple as he continued on. "There's just a little doodle I made in there. Nothing really worth mentioning!" He gave a horribly weak laugh as Al came up behind him, connecting his fist with the top of his older brother's head.

"How many times do I have to say it, brother?" Al scolded, putting his hands on his hips. "That drawing is SO not a doodle!"

My heart leaped as Mustang gave Ed a suspicious look, flipping open my sketchbook.

He was thumbing past all my alchemy circles, eyes speeding over all of them as they zoomed past.

"That can't be right." Mustang was saying. "Your drawings are always terrible."

Ed gritted his teeth, one fist raised in front of him. I saw a blood vessel bulging against his skin.

The sketchbook's pages suddenly stopped, an expression of surprise coming to Mustang. He studied the page for a few moments before glancing up at me.

"A simple doodle doesn't cover it." he mused, looking back down to Ed's art. "You could probably sell this drawing."

"Um... I... Uh..." Ed blinked, obviously at a loss for what to say.

"Hmph." Mustang quickly drew his fingers together and shut the book, straightening as his other hand found the pocket of his uniform. "Maybe I should've reconsidered your State title." An open hand passed in front of him, a rare expression of a full smile with shining eyes. "'Just Short' Alchemist!"

That expression was closed off, reduced to nothing but a smirk as Ed yelled at him.

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLIN' SO SHORT YOU GOTTA LIE DOWN ON THE GROUND WITH A MAGNIFYING GLASS AND SQUINT REAL HARD TO TRY AND SEE THEM?!"

Mustang made a talking motion with his hand as he walked back to his desk, sketchbook tucked under one arm. "We get it; you don't like being called short. Write some new material for the next time we see each other, alright?"

This was just answered with more shouts as Al and I dragged Ed away.

Mustang suddenly stopped walking, surprise coming to him.

"Oh." he began. "And Fullmetal?"

We all stopped, turning back to the Brigadier as he continued.

"You'll be happy to know there's rumors of a Philosopher's Stone in Dublith."

Despite the fact that I was holding his metal arm, I could feel the rest of Ed's body tense. Al spoke, bringing Mustang's attention to the teen bound to the armored suit.

"What's a Philosopher's Stone doing in a place like Dublith?"

"I dunno." My sketchbook was placed on Mustang's desk, on top of that paper he was looking at before. "But I'd think it's something you two would be interested in."

"Well, yeah, of course!" Al responded.

Ed swung himself up and out of our grip, both hands finding the pockets of his coat.

"What're they sayin' about the stone?" he asked.

Mustang shrugged. "People've just reported an influx of strange happenings around. Said there's people claiming to be selling stones."

Ed and Al's expression both flatlined into disbelief.

"Selling... Stones?" Ed repeated, one eyebrow twitching.

Mustang fell back into his chair, putting his feet up on his desk. "Yeah, that's what they're sayin'. Mind checking it out for me?"

With a large sigh, Ed spun himself around, walking past Al and I.

"Yeah, sure, whatever."

Before he stepped out the door, Ed stopped, glancing back over his shoulder. I waited beside him, tilting my head in question.

"What's wrong?"

Ed continued to stare at his superior. He stepped through the door, fingers slipping away from the frame as he passed through.

"He didn't give me a lecture..." Ed said softly.

Al and I walked beside him as we moved down the brightly lit hallway, retracing the path we had come.

"Well, he did mention you being old enough not to get one..." I remembered.

"Yeah, but still..." Ed's back was hunched, and his boot scuffed against the floor in a light kick as he kept walking. "That's something he's always done."

Why was he so down about that? Shouldn't it be a good thing Mustang was treating him like an adult? I was about to ask this second question when Al spoke.

"He did make a few comments." Al was smiling with his eyes; he was trying to make Ed feel better. His hands were hovering by his brother, as if he wanted to reach out and hug him.

Ed just made a light ticking sound with his teeth. He was still depressed, and I hated seeing him like this.

Without thinking, I took his arm with both of mine, smiling as I spoke.

"You wanna to go get something to eat? I'm sure there's an ice cream shop open somewhere." I grinned a little more, my conscious screaming at me as I added, "I'll even let you pay!"

Ed just looked at me, and I was relieved to see the frown on his face gone. I was even more relieved to see his mouth spread into a grin. He straightened, hurrying up as his arm hooked inwards a little, securing my hold.

"You're damn right I'm paying!"

I laughed, moving one hand away from him to muffle the sound against my lips. I heard Al laugh with me, relieved his brother was back to normal.

It seemed that all the lights in Central City were on, and it looked even more amazing than it did in the daytime. I watched the street lamps pass by as we made our down the sidewalk, feeling a child-like excitement that I hadn't experienced in a long time. Much too long, actually.

I smiled to myself, but as time went on, my thoughts eventually led me down a path I'd always been dreading. This case was DONE. It was basically over with. So why was I still here with them?

 _Where else would I be?_ I asked myself.

Ed called my name. I looked to him, noticing we were at the entrance of an ice cream parlor before noticing the light concern on his face. I had already relaxed the expression of worry that had crept up onto my face by the time Ed spoke again.

"You okay?"

I smiled brightly. "Yes, of course! Why wouldn't I be?"

He shrugged one shoulder; the arm I wasn't holding onto.

"Your hold just kinda got a little tense." he commented, glancing down to his arm. "That's all."

"O-oh." I immediately let go. "Sorry."

"No," Ed replied, "It's alright—"

The door to the ice cream shop opened up, a worker in a colorfully striped uniform ringing a bell as he shouted, "Ice cream, ice cream, get your half-priced dairy dessert right here! That's right, half-priced, but only for a limited time!"

Distantly, through an open apartment window, another voice rang out. " _Shut. Up!_ I'm trying to _sleep!_ "

The guy just hooked an arm past himself in gesture, yelling again. "Well, you might sleep better with some wonderful frozen milk in your stomach!"

Ed grimaced. "Eck. I forgot ice cream has milk in it..."

I stared at him. "You... You have to be joking..."

He looked to me, that frown still on his face. "What? I've always hated the stuff."

Al crossed his arms. "You'll never get taller if you don't have milk, Brother."

Ed just stuck his tongue out, giving a brief raspberry. I sighed, putting a hand to my face.

"You really haven't changed at all, Ed..."

I didn't mean for the comment to come off as anything close to a challenge, but the next thing I knew, Ed was looking to me again. His hands were back in his coat pockets, golden eyes narrowed at me as he tilted his head upwards.

"You really think I haven't changed, eh?"

I blinked, caught a bit off guard by the sudden shift in his demeanor. After a quick grimace, he suddenly pointed to the ice cream guy still standing outside the door.

"ALRIGHT, SCREAMING ICE CREAM GUY!" he shouted. "GIVE ME EVERY FLAVOR YOU HAVE; I'LL EAT 'EM ALL!"

The guy blinked at him for a moment, allowing the silence to be filled by the apartment shouter again.

"Oh, my god! _Trying. To. Sleep_ here!"

The employee finally grinned, overjoyed as he swept one foot in the air behind him, pushing the door open wide.

"Yes, yes, come in!" he was gushing. "Remember, all flavors are half-price!"

Ed just shot me a mischievous grin. I looked away, failing to suppress my own smile.

"You _are_ paying for this, after all."

After eating all 23 flavors of Mr. Melvin's Marvelous ice cream, Edward Elric—renowned alchemist, certified genius—got a stomach ache.

He let out a groan from his place on the couch, holding his engorged stomach.

"Why'd you talk me into doing that?!" he asked me.

I kept my jaw in my palm, other arm resting on the back of the couch as I rolled my eyes. "You were the one who started it."

Ed rolled onto his side, curling into a ball. His mouth was in that frown again, expression tense. He whimpered, and for a few moments I felt sorry. I was about to reach my hand out to his hair before a sharp grin shot onto his mouth.

"I did it, though." he said. One eye opened, looking at me with that grin still on his face. "You thought I hadn't changed."

Surprised, I leaned back, hands falling away from the couch as he followed me up. He rested one elbow on the couch's back, still grinning as I replied, flustered.

"I-I..." My fingers stopped pushing against each other, a grin of defeat on my face. "Well, I guess I did say that."

Ed laid back down on the couch, hands comfortably folding across his stomach. "So what do I win?"

I looked at him, one eyebrow raised. "It wasn't a bet, Ed..."

He just grinned, laughing a little. "I proved you wrong. That has to count for some kind of reward, right?"

I briefly raised my eyebrows like a shrug as I turned away. "I'll pay for the next meal, how's that?"

I stopped walking, looking behind me as Ed suddenly sat up. He pointed at me, shouting a little as if that could distract me from the shade of pink tinting his cheeks.

"Next time we pass by an ice cream shop!" he told me. "We'll have some, just the two of us!"

A blush of my own came to me. I opened my mouth, then closed it again, my knuckles coming to rest against my lips. Was he implying what I think he was?

My hand moved itself away from my mouth, allowing me to reply.

"But..." I tried to keep myself from talking, but the words wouldn't stop. "What about Al?"

Hearing his name, Al poked his head out from one of the rooms.

"Your tea's almost done, brother!" he called with a wave. "You should have your stomach feeling better in no time!"

Ed kept his head down, hand behind his hair. This position made it so his arm hid most of his face from me, and I only saw part of his lips move in an absentminded reply.

"Yeah, thanks, Al."

My foot shifted back. "I'll go see if Al needs any help with anything."

Ed didn't reply. He just dropped his hand away, arm landing heavily against his lap. The impact went straight to my heart, and I felt nothing but guilt. What was I doing?! I needed to say something; yes, I would love to go for ice cream with you, Ed‼

But the words wouldn't come. My feet turned me around and kept moving me further away; before I knew it, I was stepping out of the hallway and into the room Al was in.

He looked at me, the bed sheet parachuting down from his whipping gesture.

"What're you doing, Al?" I asked.

He smiled. "You never know how dirty these sheets really are!" he told me. "I was just putting on a fresh set for you!"

I smiled back, raising my hand to the back of my hair. "Oh, Al, that's so sweet of you! You didn't have to do that!"

"It's alright." He was smoothing out the middle of it and quickly tucking the corners underneath the mattress. "I know how great it is to sleep in fresh sheets."

I smiled, feeling that sad weight settle in my heart again. My hands came up to hold my arms, watching as he bundled up the old sheets that were on the floor.

"Thank you." I said.

He just smiled at me again, nodding.

"Of course!" he replied, carrying an armful of white sheets. I stepped to the side, allowing him to pass by me and walk into the hallway.

"I think your tea's done, brother." Al was saying.

I leaned against the wall, keeping my stare low to avoid looking out into the living room. I heard Ed reply, his voice quiet and defeated as he told Al to give it to me; I'd probably like it.

"What?" Al asked. "Why? I thought your stomach was hurting!"

"Doesn't hurt anymore."

I looked down even more, bowing my head. I had to say something... What was I doing, leaving him to dwell like this? What kind of friend was I?

 _A horrible one._ I answered.

He doesn't need this... He doesn't need to be dealing with _me_ on top of everything else.

"Ed..." I stepped out of the room, out into the hallway again.

The couch was empty. I looked around, only seeing Al stare at me from behind his shoulder, pouring tea into a mug.

"He went out for a walk." the younger Elric told me.

I felt like punching the wall. I stifled my sigh, allowing the weight to move my shoulders down a bit more.

"A-alright..." I responded quietly. "I'll wait up for him, I guess..."

But by the time Ed had gotten back, fatigue had gotten the best of me and I'd fallen asleep on the couch.


	9. Dublith

I woke up with a blanket over my body. Soft, thick, and a deep red—it was incredibly nice, but I didn't remember even cuddling up with it before I fell asleep. I sat up, looking down at the blanket. Come to think of it, I don't even remember noticing any blankets around the hotel room...

My attention was drawn to the kitchen area, where Al was humming in front of the stove. His back was to me, but I could see the tall chef hat on top of his helmet, the ties of a white apron across his back.

"Good morning, Al!" I chirped.

The younger Elric looked behind his shoulder and smiled at me. He echoed my greeting just as happily. The silence left me to look around, wondering aloud where Ed was.

The alchemist in question stepped out of the bedroom, bright eyes blinking at me.

"You called?"

The events of last night shot into my consciousness, the pain forcing me to look down. I listened as Ed approached the kitchen, stopping at the bar counter to say something to his brother.

He was completely happy... Like nothing between us had even happened. I watched him continue to lean on the counter, grinning at Al as the teen in the suit continued cooking... Whatever he was making.

"You've been reading all those recipes at the library, huh, Al?"

Al turned to look at him, making me notice how his chef hat was a little crooked. The front of his white apron was stained with pancake batter, too. He smiled at Ed with his eyes, giggling a little.

"I sure have!" Al replied. "There's so many books on cooking I haven't read yet! I'll need you guys to be my taste testers so I know which recipes to save for when I get my body back!"

Ed just grinned a little more. "Sure thing!"

I only smiled, and a few moments later, a small stack of piping hot pancakes were being offered to me.

"Bon appétit."

I looked up at Al, seeing his smile. I wanted to reach up and adjust that crooked hat, but something about the skewedness just seemed to fit...

"Thank you!" I took the plate, giving a small laugh as I picked up the fork he had in between two of his fingers.

"Hey, not bad, Al." Ed commented through the side of his mouth. He was leaning against the counter, one arm resting on the granite slab.

"Really?" Al said.

Ed nodded a few times, taking another bite. "Needs some syrup, though."

"Oh‼" Al sped off to the stove again. "I made some right here! I just forgot to put it on!"

Ed and I both grinned as Al darted between us, pouring enough syrup on my small stack and Ed's massive pile. I blinked at how many pancakes he had; how did he eat that much?!

"Thanks, Al." Ed grinned as his brother tilted the syrup container upright.

Al smiled. "You're welcome, brother! I'm glad you like the pancakes!"

I smiled, watching with one arm on the couch, one hand supporting the side of my face. Ed just nodded at his brother's reply, cutting off another piece of three pancake layers.

He slipped the fork in between his lips, the utensil turned upside down.

"Hey, so I bumped into Hawkeye on the way back from Central library." he said suddenly.

I wasn't sure who Hawkeye was, but Al seemed ecstatic.

"Really? How's she doing?"

Ed just nodded along, taking another bite in that weird way of his. "She's doing well. Nothing much going on. She told me a little bit about that Philosopher's Stone in Dublith, though."

"She did?" I asked. "What'd she say?"

Ed's stare flickered to me, and just meeting his eyes caused a flash of pain to my chest. He resumed eating.

"Said something about a friend of a friend of a friend buying one. They're trying to trace that one all on their own, but Hawkeye said the stone costed a _hoot_ load of money."

I raised my eyebrow at his censored language as Al started thinking.

"This doesn't make any sense, brother." he said. "There's no way..."

"Yeah," There was something in Ed's voice; a frustration, a pain, as he set his empty plate on the counter. "Which means we're just going to Dublith to bust some fakers."

"So it's a lost cause..." Al's voice echoed in the suit more than usual, the sound of hopelessness ringing clear.

Ed remained quiet, picking up the mug of coffee Al had set down with his breakfast. He took a sip as I looked down, wanting to say something and get the mood light again. I noticed the blanket again and leaned to the side, setting my partially-eaten breakfast down on the coffee table.

"Where did this blanket come from?"

I held the item in question away from me as I spoke, noticing a familiar Flamel insignia decorated through the blanket's faux fur. I turned to Ed, watching his eyes curve into a smile over the rim of his cup. Heat rose to my face as I looked down, resting the blanket on my lap again in wrinkled folds. I had to say something; I felt awful for last night...

And he was nice enough to do this after everything...

Why was I such a terrible friend?

* * *

I got to thinking again, as we were walking back to the station. I figured they were going to part ways with me at the train station, where they would aboard the next train to Dublith, and... I would take the next one back home...

My stomach felt like it was about to reject Al's breakfast when I heard Ed's voice. Both he and Al stopped walking.

"You okay?" he asked me.

I stopped walking as well. I looked to him, still pained by the sight of the concern on his face. I nodded, turning away from his gaze.

"Yeah. Just... Wondering about getting home, is all."

Al tilted his head. "What do you mean?" he asked.

I blinked at him, momentarily at a loss for a reply. "We're... Parting ways at the station, aren't we?"

Ed seemed just as shocked as I was. He shook it off, giving a light scoff as he buried his hands in his pockets.

"Like we'd leave each other like that." he said, the slightest of pink in his face. "We're already waitin' to hear back from that last case, so you might as well tag along. If anyone needs to contact you, they can just find us. Makes everything easier."

I felt incredibly relieved, but I only let it spread into a smile. My face heated up a little bit. "Yes, that's right! I guess I wasn't really thinking!" I tried to laugh a little bit, seeing that slight smile come back to Ed again.

I guess things were back to normal between us.

We all started walking, and I found I had my hands behind my back. There was a happiness fluttering around me, too, and I was even smiling without realizing it. Without forcing it.

The butterflies increased, tickling the inside of my stomach. I felt like a little kid again. But my mind had to go elsewhere, falling back into that abyss.

"I just hope I can help you out on this case!" I said, echoing my thoughts.

I heard a quick grin shoot onto Ed's mouth. I turned just in time to see him finish looking away from me. I followed his gaze, seeing we were approaching the train station's platform. The train to Dublith was already waiting.

"You don't have anything to worry about." he told me softly.

* * *

"Rush Valley... Next stop, Rush Valley..."

I glanced away from the ceiling, hearing the conductor's voice fade into the train's light background noise.

We'd been on this train for hours... I needed to get up and stretch. But I noticed something about the two alchemists sitting across from me had changed.

"Are you two alright?"

Al looked up, Ed just gave me a small glance, continuing to rest his palm in his jaw. Continuing to look out the window as his younger brother replied.

"Y-Yeah!" he said. "It's... Just been a while since we've been here!"

"Really?" I asked. "How long has it been?"

Al tapped his chin, looking away from me. "Ummm..."

"Three years." Ed's voice sounded horrible; incredibly weak.

I looked to him for a long moment, seeing his head had moved down enough to hide his bangs over his eyes. Covering his expression from me.

"Y-yeah." Al nodded quickly. "Almost three years, that's right! It's been a while..."

I wondered what in the heck was going on... I looked down at the aisle, wondering what I should say. What I _could_ say... My mind was pulling me in another direction, away from this conversation.

"What do we do," I began, "When we get to Dublith?"

If anything, this comment just seemed to make Ed even _quieter_. I saw his shoulders slump a bit further, part of my mind listening as Al spoke.

"We'll probably just ask around, like we did before."

I nodded absentmindedly, still wondering what was going on... First Rush Valley, then something with Dublith?

I didn't understand.

My hand curled into a fist, bunching up my skirt a little bit.

"Ed..."

He looked towards me, bangs swinging and covering half of one eye. His hand lifted, finger sweeping his hair away. Those golden eyes looked perfectly normal, everything I had seen before... All that strange heaviness... Gone.

"Yeah?" he asked, and returned my name back to me.

I looked to him for another moment, trying to find something more in his perfectly innocent stare. A blush moved to his cheeks, and I quickly held up a hand with a smile.

"Nothing!" I replied, waving a hand a little bit. "I forgot what I was going to say!"

"Um," He sat up a bit, confusion clenching the space between his brows, "Okay. Lemme know when you remember it."

I nodded, fighting back the embarrassment on my face. "Of course. I will."

I didn't, of course...

* * *

It was nice to get to Dublith, but almost as soon as I started to enjoy the feeling of walking again and stretching out my legs, I noticed Ed slump into that space again. He kept walking alongside me, and even though Al was following behind, he didn't seem to comment about his brother's shift in mood.

Al suddenly stopped walking. I turned around, hearing the pivot of Ed's boot as he did the same.

"Should we go door-to-door again, brother?" Al asked.

Ed straightened his posture, leaning his head back with a slight groan. "Yeah, maybe. We might wanna just see what we pick up walking around town, though. This place has to be buzzing with activity, if they're really selling these things."

I nodded, and a minute or two later, Ed was leading us into a restaurant. He spun around and pushed the doors open with his back, giving me a mischievous grin.

I smiled, turning away. "If you really wanna pay..." I honestly didn't _want_ him too, but he seemed to really enjoy spending money like that. Whatever I had to do to get him out of that funk.

Ed just grinned even more and gave a light cackle, stepping back and holding the door open as I entered the restaurant. I blushed a little bit, keeping my hands behind me as I walked past him.

"You really don't have to." I said quietly.

Ed just had the side of his finger against the base of his nose, a blush on his face as well. "Well... Y'know..."

His attention snapped to the outside as Al spoke.

"I'll go look around town."

Ed nodded, seeming just as pleased with the suggestion. "We'll check in here, Al!"

"Alright!" With a quick wave, Al started along the sidewalk again.

I turned back, about to tease and ask him just how much we were going to work on this case. But Ed was already getting us a table, waving at me from the center of the room.

I smiled back, striding over and fighting back the butterflies in my gut. This wasn't our ice cream date, but I had to give him a hand for setting this up so smoothly.

Conversation was strained at first, nothing but us staring down at the menus we'd been given. Despite the fact that I hadn't eaten anything since breakfast (and denied Ed's offer to buy something on the train), I didn't feel very hungry.

I looked up, watching Ed continue to stare at my side of the table. He looked focused, hands folded in front of his lips. I realized what he was doing; the background noise of the restaurant became a little sharper, the voices gradually becoming separate from each other.

The restaurant looked fairly high-end, and I put together another piece of Ed's complex plan. He mentioned the stone was expensive, so if anyone would be talking about it...

"Can I get you two anything to drink?"

My attention snapped back, seeing a waiter beam down at me. I frantically opened my menu, searching for the drink section.

"Is your chardonnay any good?" Ed was asking the waiter.

The man nodded solemnly. "Very smooth this afternoon, sir."

"Ed," my voice turned the Alchemist's attention towards me, "It's one in the afternoon... And you're working, aren't you?"

This last point seemed to be the one to change his mind. He frown a little. "Ah, yeah. I guess you're right."

His hand began waving the waiter away. "Give us a minute, will ya?" Ed suddenly stopped, eyes widening as they stared at me from the rim of the menu. His hand moved into a fist. "No, wait."

The waiter stopped walking away, and instantly he was back to our table. "Yes, sir?"

I suppressed a sigh. I wondered if this guy actually thought we had any money at all...

"Uh," Ed's eyes were frantically searching the menu, wide with nervousness. He looked to me again, asking what I wanted to drink.

I smiled to the waiter. "Just some water, please."

Irritation spiked into Ed's expression, and I grinned. Water was so cheap that it was free to drink. I was keeping my side of the bill as low as possible, especially in a place like this.

"Make it some really nice water..." Ed murmured, setting his menu down as he closed it.

"Yes, sir."

The waiter didn't move to write our order down, probably just thinking about how cheap we were. Wondering if he should lock the doors, in case we decided to dine and dash...

He just blinked, continuing on. "And to eat?"

I quickly focused back to my menu, listening as Ed rambled on and ordered at least half the menu for himself. How can someone eat this much?!

I suddenly found something on the menu that looked appealing. But my eyes swept to the price, and I shoved the idea of having lobster out my brain.

Ed's voice suddenly cut off. He seemed to be following my stare, turning to the next page and looking at the same side I was.

"No, Ed—"

"And we'll split your lobster, too."

My face found the table. I sighed against the white fabric, wishing I could somehow get rid of his attention for detail.

"What?" Ed returned as the waiter nodded and walked away with a long list of food. "We're splitting it."

I picked my head up, supporting my jaw with one hand. I reminded myself not to comment; this was getting him away from whatever mood he had been in before. The sounds of the restaurant drifted into my focus again.

"Have you heard anything?" I asked him quietly.

Ed swept his eyes to the people behind me, stare searching. "No. Not yet. We should probably keep talking, though. Make it look like we're just, um..." His stare dropped, mouth becoming a grin as his cheeks went a bit red. "Like we're just a couple of friends out for lunch."

"And ordering half of the kitchen." I muttered, returning his grin.

He just nodded, eyes moving down and away from me. He picked his arm up, bringing it around to the back of his head. I recognized the tinge of pink coming to his face; the same shade it had been last night, when he half-yelled at me for us to go have ice cream together.

"Ed..." I began. "About last night..."

The Alchemist instantly shook his head, dismissing my soon-to-be apology. His eyes swept the space off to my left, still focusing.

"Don't worry about it." he said quietly. "I understand."

I hated hearing that. He'd been crushed when I was STUPID enough to reject him, and now he's probably even more hurt. He must have seen the emotions in my face because he looked back to me. Ed gave a smile that didn't reach his eyes.

"I said don't worry about it!" he told me. "We're having something now, aren't we?"

"Y-yeah." I straightened, avoiding his gaze. My fingers moved along the table, nails gently scraping against the white fabric. "I'm..."

"Your waters." The announcement was spoken with a slight bite to it, and I picked my hands up off the table as a glass of ice water was placed in front of me.

I beamed at the waiter, who met my expression with a incredibly polite smile. "Thank you!"

He simply nodded. "Your food will be out in just a moment."

I returned his nod, and heard Ed give a word of thanks as the man walked away from us a little too quickly. I sighed and Ed instantly asked what was wrong.

"That guy probably thinks we're broke..." I said, shaking my head.

The Alchemist just grinned. "Wait til he sees his tip, then."

"The military pays well." I added a question to my voice; one he answered with a nod.

"I've been taking more cases lately," he replied, and I noticed a bit of sadness in his voice, a bit of roughness, "So that's where the influx of cash is coming from."

I nodded, wanting to find out more but deciding to keep the topic at bay. There was something he didn't want to talk about, and I wasn't about to make him.

Ed motioned to me with his water, almost like a toast. "So tell me about that martial art school you run."

Memories ransacked my brain.

Alphonse's voice, asking me if I had to go home and teach soon. And I told him I might call and have someone cover—I COMPLETELY FORGOT!

My panic was written on my face as a complete expression of hopelessness. Ed looked alarmed. "Is everything okay?!"

I snapped out, realizing I could cover my tracks. "Y-yes! Everything's fine! I just remembered I forgot to call and have someone cover, that's all!"

"Oh." He relaxed, the hair that had stood up falling back into place. "Okay. What're you going to do?"

"I could probably stop by a phone after we're finished." I mused, looking out to the entrance. "Classes don't start until tomorrow, but I'm sure everyone's wondering why they haven't seen me around!"

"Yeah," Ed leaned back, still seeming a tad shaken from seeing me so stressed, "I'd be worried, too."

I sent him a smile, one he looked up to catch and send right back. The arms of the waiter suddenly came into my sight, hands placing a massive, steaming lobster between us.

Ed was already drooling, fork and knife in hand. "Ah, wow, that looks great!"

He looked around as more food was placed in front of him by multiple people, quickly covering his side of the table. He grinned with pure glee. I just smiled, reaching to pull off a claw from the lobster.

* * *

The dial felt heavy against my finger as I rotated it. Dialing the number like I was phoning a ghost.

I held the phone to my ear, hearing the dull tone disappear and reappear as my call was connected.

And kept trying to connect.

I cleared my throat, looking out beyond the glass beside me. Meeting Ed and Al's smiling eyes as they waited close by.

"Hi," I said into the phone, "You're still here, right?"

No one spoke; the tone repeated again.

I made a sound of agreement in the back of my throat, nodding a little bit. "I'm glad to hear that!" I forced a smile onto my face, turning to the dial in front of me. The numbers stared back. Just as empty as the non-existent person I was talking to.

"See, I was calling about that, actually..." I began. "I was hoping..." I couldn't even say the words. I pretended to agree again, beaming a smile. "Yes, that's right! I don't think it'll be for too long, but you'll be able to handle it, right?"

The dial tone just buzzed.

"I'll let you know when I'm about to come back. Shouldn't be for more than a few days!"

I felt my chest begin to crack. I _couldn't_ go back. I couldn't even bare the thought...

I pretended to laugh, hoping Ed and Al couldn't hear me through the glass. The sound was horrible.

"Okay. I'll talk to you soon... Yes... Okay."

The phone was replaced, and I kept my hand on it. I resisted the urge to hang my head, realizing I had to step out of the phone booth now. I could hear Ed and Al talking about something, the tone of their conversation light. It made it easier to slip out of that glass box, the door falling shut behind me.

I stepped around, meeting them again with a smile.

"Hi!"

Ed turned, giving a grin as Al greeted me.

"Did you get everything squared away?" the younger Elric asked.

I nodded, fighting back the feeling of my insides drying up. "Yes, everything's perfectly settled."

"Great! We can keep looking now." Al turned, head moving across the opposite side of the street. "I was just telling brother I got wind of a shop on the opposite side of town. Downtown, actually."

"Really?" I asked. "That's wonderful! Is it close by?"

Al nodded. "It's only a few minutes walk from here."

Ed just put a hand on his brother's arm. "Just lead the way, Al!"

"Right!" Al nodded.

Ed and I trailed behind as Al led us down the sidewalk again. Within a few minutes of silence, however, I noticed Ed's posture slumping again. I suppressed a sigh, making note of how his head was bowed so low, bangs hiding his eyes from me again.

My mind suddenly, finally, started working again. A memory came; I'd asked about Winry, and Ed's soft reply accompanied the sight of the sidewalk.

 _"...In a relationship with some guy from Dublith, which is interesting."_

I looked to Ed, seeing his stare stay so low to the ground.

 _"Last I heard, they were making plans to marry."_

Before I could think otherwise, I reached out, taking his hand in mine. He looked up, seeming to snap out of whatever thoughts he was having. A blush touched his cheeks, and for a moment, he did nothing but stare at me.

I smiled, trying not to feel morbidly embarrassed for what I was doing. Suddenly, the suit of armor in front of us shifted, and before Al had even turned around half-way, both of Ed's hands were in his pockets. His eyes were closed, a light scowl replacing whatever he had been feeling before. I withdrew my hand, trying not to feel hurt as I listened to what Al had stopped to tell us.

"The Devil's Nest, right?"

I heard a sound of interest come from Ed, his calm voice accompanying it a moment later.

"Yeah, if that's the place you say it is." A grin came to him. "What a trip, huh?"

A much different voice came from Al's suit and it rang out clear. Like someone wasn't speaking from a suit.

"You don't know the half of it, you little runt!"

I watched as a red light surrounded Al, parting from the middle and revealing another body. Long hair flowed down, wildly framing a wicked grin. Purple eyes narrowed.

"Hey there, pipsqueak." The thing that was ONCE Al said. "See you've grown about half a centimeter since I saw you last."

Ed's eyes were wide. Fearful. His boot slid back, about to take a full step as a single word came from his mouth.

"Envy..."

The... Person in front of us just grinned a bit bigger, laughing through his wide smile. "Uh, yeah. Been a little while, hasn't it?"

"W-Wh..." Ed was struggling for words, still trying to regain his composure. His face was pale, ghost-like. "What'd you do with Al, you bastard?" His words were broken, the curse nothing but a sound cracking out of his throat.

Envy grinned again before his hands left his hips, raising out in a bored shrug. "Ah, he's probably having a nice talk with some fellow Homunculi of mine. Seems fitting that our mutual hatred for you two brought us together."

"Fellow Homunculi?" I repeated quietly. I flinched a little bit as Envy spoke to me, lips puckered as he teased.

"Nice hand-holding there, girlie. If I'd known you and the pipsqueak were so close, I would've kidnapped you instead."

This seemed to kick Ed back into his normal self. I heard a growl before seeing him in front of Envy, holding the Homunculus up by the shirt. Ed jerked his hands forward, roughly giving a shake as he spoke. His voice was low, and I felt my insides turn cold at the sound of it.

"Tell me where Al is or I'll kill you again."

Envy just smirked. "Like I wouldn't just come back." His eyes closed, one hand on Ed's human wrist. "Well..." The hand clenched, the strength seeming painful. "Instead of just telling you..."

Before I knew what was going on, Ed had been thrown through the double doors, barreling down the staircase. "LET ME SHOW YOU!"

I hit the back of my heel against the ground, revealing the compartment ready to tie this THING up with the ground.

"Oh, no." Envy was suddenly behind me, and I felt his leg sweep mine. My arm came up just in time for the side of my forearm to scrape against the ground, cushioning the impact and saving what could have been a possible broken neck.

I continued on with the momentum, pushing against the ground with my other hand and rolling to my feet. My balance was almost off-set by the ground rumbling, like there was an earthquake. My hand found the side of the building's broken entrance as Ed's voice yelled at me from the base of the stairs, telling me to get out of the way.

I watched as the ground beneath Envy shot upwards in sections, the ends becoming narrow and tapered to points as they pierced through him. My eyes shut as I saw the blood began to spray out of his body like miniature fountains. And when the rumbling had stopped, I willed my eyes to open again. They did, and with my vision a little skewed from how heavily I was leaning against the doorframe, I saw what happened to Envy.

Spikes had been embedded into him. A lot of them. The sharp points of the ground lurched upwards, and as soon as they had fully slammed through their target—whether it was through an arm or a leg or all the way from the groin to the forehead—more spikes shot out from the sides like thorns.

I stared in horror. There was so much blood...

Ed's ragged breath brought my focus to the staircase as he finished climbing up. With his body bent over, he looked at me, making sure I wasn't hurt before his eyes turned to Envy. Envy met his stare, mouth open in shock—or perhaps because a spike was holding his chin downwards.

"That should hold him until I get Al back." Edward told me. "You need to get out of here."

"But—"

"No." He held up a hand, and I only had to remember the first time I had tried to help them.

I stepped back. I wasn't going to risk losing Ed's sight again because of my stupid mistakes.

"Alright." I looked to Envy, who gave the best glare he could given the spikes in his forehead. "Where should I go? What if he finds me?"

"Fuck."

I turned back to Ed, incredibly surprised to hear him curse like that. His hand was in his hair, expression narrowed in frustrated thought.

"Dammit." he cursed again. I could tell his mind was at a crossroad. Soon, he picked a path. He looked to me.

"How well can you transmute carbon?"

I popped the lid beneath my right shoe open. "I got a transmutation circle engraved right here."

I heard Envy sneer with the upper portion of his mouth, the annoyed sound turning into pain. I guess doing facial expressions hurt him, too. I noticed Ed glance to him, and briefly I followed his gaze, seeing the Homunculus' skin try and regrow. Regenerate around the spikes. But there were a lot of spikes for him to work around; like Ed had told me, it would take a while for him to recover.

"Let's go." Ed took off down the stairs and I followed behind.

He didn't seem hurt from the concrete steps he'd fallen on, or if he was then he wasn't showing it. Maybe the metal parts of his body absorbed most of the impact, or maybe he just healed himself again...

We were headed down a long hallway and seemed to be approaching the door at the very end. As Ed began to turn his shoulder to the door, he clapped his hands, placing his left one on his right wrist. The transmutation light was nearly blinding, the color a roaring mixture of blue and red.

"ALRIGHT, LET'S GET THIS OVER WITH!"

The entrance broke open under his force, slamming down onto the floor as Ed followed through with the momentum. He landed ahead of the broken door, and despite the cloud of dust from the wood, I could see the massive blade he had transmuted part of his arm into. The tip dragged against the ground as he rose from his hunched position, the blade barely touching the floor as he straightened to his full height.

"Which one of you disgusting Homunculi am I killing first?"

What was happening?! I'd never seen Ed like this, but I was also so confused about Homunculi. Artificial people were nothing but hypotheses... But maybe not; not after I had seen Envy...

I braced my fear, surveying the room. Al was there, bound to the wall in thick chains that also captured his hands and feet together. They had gone a bit overboard, but the positions of his hands and feet together like that did prevent him from using alchemy. I shook the thought away, scanning the other two in the room.

One of them a blonde haired lady, who seemed incredibly bored with the situation. The other, a man who was much more fat than he was tall.

"Thanks for the quiet entrance." the woman drawled. "You ruined our door, too..."

"What a pain, right?" Ed replied, seeming to be quoting something. "Now who the hell are you?"

The woman just smirked. "I don't feel like giving an introduction." She shrugged one shoulder, hand flourishing away from her face and staying palm-up. "Just let me be the one who collects the bounty on your head, Fullmetal Alchemist."

Ed stared at her. "What? What bounty?"

Her purple eyes narrowed, smile turning coy. "Let's cut the chit-chat, shall we? I've got more work to do after this."

"I couldn't agree more." He charged forward, and Al suddenly grabbed both of our focus.

"Brother! She's not like Greed!"

I heard the slightest sound of surprise from Edward before seeing the blood shoot out of his arm. Pieces of his coat fluttered to the ground as I saw something _else_ swing down. Something long and narrow; stringy. Oh, God—was that a tendon?!

I tried to scream for him but the sound of his voice drowned out mine.

He fought to stay standing, the muscle dragging against the floor. He groaned through gritted teeth, watching as the tall Homunculus slowly walked forward, heels clicking against the floor.

"See," she began, "The thing about Homunculi is that we have these powers." Her hand went towards Ed's face, and he cried out again, like she was ripping the muscles in his face from the inside. "But I'm sure you know all about that."

My mind came back to me. I hit my shoe against the floor, transmuting the ground and attempting to grab her. She slipped out of my concrete grasp with a single jump upwards, the makeshift hand crumbling as she stood on it. _Searing_ pain came to my leg, and through squinted eyes I looked down to see my muscles outside of my skin. Disconnected and spread out against the floor.

I cursed loudly, the word ripping out of me as I heard Ed yell out my name. The sound of clapping came and I saw nothing but bright red. Another scream wailed out, but this was from a voice I didn't recognize.

When the flash died down and the dots crowding my vision cleared enough, I saw the room was mostly filled with spikes. Coming out from every direction, every side of the room. And in the center, the blonde Homunculus, now coated in pink-red blood, twitching in silent agony.

Ed walked forward, hand about to clutch his left arm before thinking better of it. He stopped in front of the Homunculus, the purple eye that didn't have a spike driven through it looking to him.

"Who sent you?" he snapped. "What's this about a bounty on my head?"

The Homunculus twitched one side of her lip. Ed blinked.

"Oh... Right..."

He clapped again, placing his usable hand on a few of the spikes through her mouth and neck. They retracted, her wounds healing over in bright-red currents of electricity as she smiled.

"Foolish boy."

Multiple muscles in his right leg ripped out, the longer ones splaying onto the ground as he fell forward, holding himself up against a spike with a forearm. He screamed through his agony, and I adjusted some of my weight onto my right leg; the one with the muscles ripped out of it. I stifled a scream, voice lurching against my mouth as tears ran beneath my vision. But soon, the marking on the bottom of my shoe was completely against the floor.

I transmuted one of the spikes, driving a longer one through her head. Pink blood shot out, splattering the bases of the spikes and the floor. The tips of Edward's leg muscles, too. I took a prolonged blink, holding back my nausea.

"Why won't you die?" I asked her.

"Oh, it seems we have a novice!" she said, her voice sounding odd; like she was speaking while holding one side of her mouth wide open. My eyes shot open again. I looked up, realizing I had driven the spike through the side of her mouth and beyond. She could still talk, so she could still transmute.

I was ready to drive another spike into her when Ed called my name.

"Don't." he said. "I need to get information out of this bitch."

The part of me that was still worried about trivial things once again became stunned by the language. I looked to him, watching the arm he used to support himself drop away, weight leaning into his metal leg.

"Will you tell me what I need to know," he asked, "Or do I have to be holding your stone in order to get you to talk?"

"Stupid boy." Her eyes narrowed, but something about her voice just sounded so funny. I'm sure I would've grinned, if the situation wasn't dangerous and my leg didn't feel like it was numb...

"Pretty impressive Alchemy you got there." A hand suddenly grabbed my hair.

Ed turned, his eyes widening at the person behind me. I tried to get away, hearing a smooth voice speak near my ear.

"Now, now, hold on. Let's take it easy for a second, alright?"

My body suddenly went limp, all hope of struggling gone. I could only meet Ed's fearful gaze with my own, hoping he could hear my pleading thoughts.

"Greed..." he whispered.

"Mm, yeah, that'd be me." My body rose, being pulled up by my hair. I couldn't even scream; I was that disabled.

"How... You're still alive... You, and Envy... And Gluttony..."

The fatter Homunculus, who had been in the corner sucking on his entire hand, suddenly started jumping around. He clapped his oversized hands together above his head.

"New me! New me!"

"New...?" Ed repeated.

Gluttony trained his stare on Edward, a large open-mouthed grin coming to him, strings of drool separating between his large teeth.

"Food…" he said. "I've been hungry. There hasn't been anything to _eat_ down here!"

"Here," Ed clapped his hands again, leaning back and placing his metal one on the spike behind him. I watched another spike shoot forward, spreading out into three pitch fork-like tongs that embedded into the Homunculus' arms and mouth. His tongue had risen upwards, the middle spike piercing through the large tattoo before stabbing into his face. "Chew on this."

The tip of Gluttony's tongue wiggled around, a soft moan coming to him.

Behind me, Greed gave a smirking laugh. "Damn, you really don't know what's going on, do you, kid?"

He moved the hand holding me up, waving me around like I was a doll. "So are you gonna come with us peacefully or do I have to make your girlie friend here really scream?"

Anger finally came to Edward's face. I could see he was still in pain from his injuries. The glossiness of his eyes told me that much.

"What are you doing here?" he asked. His metal hand pointed to Gluttony, who was hopelessly trying to wiggle his body out of the spikes, just resulting in more pink-blood sloshing out onto the floor. "Why is he back alive?!"

Greed just sighed. "God, you really don't listen do you, shorty?" He ignored the flash of pure annoyance in Ed's expression. He moved me around again, and this time I was able to cry out. "Come with us." he said, sounding out everything as if he were scolding a child. "We'll let your—"

"That's it." Ed clapped his metal hand against his disabled one. "I'm done asking questions."

Red lightning roared towards me.

* * *

 **A/N** : Oh, wow this chapter (ending scene especially) was _a lot_ of fun for me to write—I'm definitely a sucker for anything so violent it makes you cringe just a little bit haha. It's just a writer trait, I swear...

Anyway, just a quick announcement that I'm now opening up the companion piece to this story, _Moments In Time_. You can check that out on my profile if you're interested.

Also, I'm aware that the grammatically correct presentation of the word "homunculus/homunculi" would in fact be lowercase. Our main character likes to see certain things as being "bigger" than she is; more powerful, in a way. You might've noticed I've done this with the word "alchemist" during certain scenes in the story (either referring to Ed as someone with more "status" than her (Alchemist) or her equal (alchemist)). I figure I should mentioned that since I haven't done so yet.

Anyway, hope you enjoyed the chapter! Because this is so lengthy, and I'd like to give everyone time to read it, I'll probably skip a week and post chapter 10 around **9/15**. In the mean time, please check out the companion fic; I'm very excited to start posting those chapters!


	10. Stopping and Stalling

**A/N:** This story broke 1,000 views! Thank you guys so much!

* * *

I woke up in a hospital bed. Ed was sitting in chair close by, the daytime light from the window catching onto the metal of his automail. His coat was off, set onto the back of the empty chair beside him. I was transfixed by the prosthetic arm for another moment before memories came back to me. My eyes scanned over his human arm, fully revealed by the tank top. There was no wound... It was perfectly healed.

But that didn't make any sense; his _muscle_ had been torn out.

My thoughts had naturally made my head turn downward, and soon enough I caught sight of the splint tightly capturing my right leg. That's right—the memory, and the pain, of my own muscles shooting out of my body came back. I shuddered the feeling away before hearing someone gently smack their lips together—like they were waking up from a long sleep.

When I looked back, Ed was raising his head up a bit more, giving me view of the lines beneath his half-lidded eyes. He looked exhausted.

"Ed..." I called to him, bringing his golden stare to me.

He perked up, his eyes seeming much more alive. Normal, even.

He grinned at me. "Oh, hey." he greeted. "I'm glad to see you're up! How're you feeling?"

"I..." Memories came back again, and I shook my head in pure confusion. "How are _you_ feeling? Your body..."

"Perfectly normal." He moved his arm so I could see the side of his forearm. Just like I suspected, there was no sign of any injury. Not even a scar. "Well, as normal as my body _could_ be, of course."

I didn't echo his self-deprecating laugh, continuing to think. Again, I gave up trying to figure everything out and just asked him.

He leaned back in his chair, putting one arm on the back of the seat beside him and crossing his legs.

"Well..." he began, "After Greed grabbed you and I told him to shut up, my transmutation light went red again." His brows came closer together in thought. "I was able to drive a spike through him; he has this shield that's _supposedly_ the best thing ever and can block _anything_ but really it's just made of carbon." He waved a hand, dismissing his ramble. "Anyway, some of my spikes went through, like the material was adapting as it pierced into him."

"That's..." I let the stunned expression on my face speak for itself.

"I know; it's impossible."

I looked down, thinking for a moment before asking, "Okay, then what happened? How are you healed like this?"

Ed shrugged, bringing his human arm in front of himself to look at it again. "After I took care of Greed—"

"Took care of him?!"

He looked to me. "Well, yeah, I wasn't about to let the guy just walk out of there—"

"What..." Words failed me, and part of my brain felt horrible for interrupting him like this. But... He couldn't have killed that guy, right? Not Ed; he wouldn't have...

A memory of Ed's voice came back, the sight of him holding Envy up by the shirt.

 _"Tell me where Al is or I'll kill you again."_

I looked up at the sound of my name. Ed spoke it softly, his eyes turned away.

"They're... Not really people..." he told me. He shook his head. "A few years back, I would've completely agreed with never taking their lives... No way. But now... If they're going to fight me like this, especially like they did before, I can't risk leaving them alive."

"What do you mean 'before?'" My voice was a whisper. "This happened _before?_ "

Ed raised a shoulder, metal clicking at the action. "Well, yeah. Sort of. Maybe Al can help me fill everything in when he gets back."

"Where'd he go?" A better reply came to me. "YOU LET HIM GO OUT ALONE?"

Ed waved away my yell. "He left a few minutes ago. He's filling in a report on what happened for me. No big deal; he's probably surrounded by military officials we've known for years!"

I blinked. "They'd let him do that?"

"Yeah, I mean, he was an eyewitness to everything, even if he was bound to the wall the whole time." His expression soured, narrowed eyes sweeping to the doorway. "They'll probably ask me to give reference when he gets back... I hate doing this kind of stuff..."

I allowed myself to laugh, the sound muted by my knuckles against my mouth. I saw Ed look back to me, a soft smile curving his lips.

He sank deeper into the chair, still smiling as he asked, "How're you feeling?"

"Wait, you never answered my question." I remembered. "How are you healed like that?"

"Oh yeah." A characteristically large grin came to him. His hand went to the back of his hair. "Sorry. Um, so after I told Greed to put a cork in it—" His eyes curved in a light smile as I tried to stifle my laughter again "—and those spikes went through him, sorta, I started healing, too."

His metal hand reached around to his human arm, as if he were gathering the muscles and sweeping them back in again. "All my muscles came back and reattached like it was some kind of transmutation."

"And you're perfectly fine?"

He nodded. "Yeah, I feel great." He smiled again. "You didn't answer my question, though."

"Oh." I grinned, feeling foolish we were bouncing around topics like this. "Sorry." As he shook his head to dismiss my apology, I looked down at my leg. "I don't really feel much of anything. Not in my leg, anyway."

I moved my toes, relieved to find that at least those were functioning perfectly. I couldn't shift my foot around, though; doing so caused a light spike of pain.

With a soft concern, Ed looked over at the door again. "Doctor was telling me around an hour ago that the recovery time shouldn't take too long." he said.

I nodded, trying to smile through my guilt. "I wouldn't want to slow you two down, though."

"Um..." Ed turned away, avoiding my stare. "That's kinda what we need to talk to you about, actually..." He added my name, and there was a sadness in there that told me what he wasn't saying aloud.

"You're..." I couldn't even say the words. I swallowed, forcing myself to blurt it out and watch Ed turn further away from me. "You're leaving me here?!"

"It's not because you're slowing us down." he responded quickly, looking back. "We just don't want you to get any more hurt."

 _There's no way..._ I wanted to say this, but the words stopped themselves inside my mouth, dying from my own anger. I could feel myself breaking, the walls and all those layers I thought made up my personality quickly slipping.

I _couldn't_ go back there...

I turned away from Ed. "I can't believe you would just kick me out like this!"

 _Kick me out?_ I repeated in my head. _They'd never agreed to permanently take me anywhere!_

Luckily, Ed fell for the guilt trip. I could hear the small sound that came from the back of his throat as his mouth dropped into a frown, eyes going wide as he kept his hands in front of himself.

"Uh... Well..." He tried to smile. "Maybe Al can explain it better when he gets back..."

"Explain my rejection notice?!" I retorted. "How could you do this?"

"Listen." Ed leaned forward, one arm on his knee. "This is for a long-term good. We're trying to help you."

He added my name, and I relaxed; something about him still saying it that softly when he seemed completely ticked calmed me down. I looked back to my leg, moving my toes again.

"I'll recover really soon." I said. "I'll make—"

Ed called me again as he leaned back. He sighed. "This isn't a negotiation." he told me. "As much as you want it to be. We _can't_ let you stay."

I growled, hand clenching the bedsheets as I made a fist. Ed seemed surprised, focusing on my hand before he looked back to my face. I held his stare for a long time, seeing nothing but subtle interest in those golden eyes.

He looked away.

"I'll talk to Al when he gets back."

Yes!

I grinned for a few solid moments, noticing Ed look over and give that small smile. I hadn't seen that one in a while, come to think of it.

Al opened the door to our hospital room, the motion cautious and quiet. His head perked up, surprised to see I was awake.

"You're up!" he exclaimed.

I nodded, a bit shy as I grinned a little. "Yeah, I'm feeling pretty much all better!"

"Can't really move your leg..." Ed muttered, ignoring my flash of irritation.

As he stepped further into the room, Al looked down to the splinted limb. "You can't?" he repeated. He turned to his brother. "Well, the recovery couldn't take too long, right?"

Ed nodded. "Yeah, probably only a few weeks."

"A few weeks?!" I repeated, swaying a little in worry. "That's horrible!"

Ed opened his mouth to respond when Al suddenly spoke, both hands on his hips.

"That's okay!" he said. "I know you can do it! We'll be back on the road again in no time!"

"Al..." Ed growled.

Al's eyes shrunk, realization hitting him. "Oh. Right. Sorry, force of habit, I suppose."

"Ed!" I brought his focus back to me and watched realization dawn on him as well.

"Oh, yeah." His hand reached to the back of his hair again. "Change of plans, Al."

"Huh?" Al asked.

"Um..." Ed scratched his face with his metal hand, looking away as a light blush came to him. "So..."

Suddenly he was pushing Al out the door. "Can I talk to you for a sec'? Just take a moment." With his back forcing a confused Al out into the hallway, Ed sent me a grin and gave a small wave. "We'll see you in a bit!"

His laughter was incredibly weak and nervous, leaving me to stare at the door as it slammed shut.

I looked back down to my leg, straining to hear their voices from the other side of the wall. But I could only make out clips of sound; broken pieces amidst the buzz of the hospital staff.

Al's voice, however, was the clearest.

"What?" he asked, shocked. "I thought we had to let her go! You were the one that told me that!"

"I... I know... But..." The rest of Ed's voice was overtaken by an intercom speaker. Some announcement I had to strain to try and hear through. I couldn't, and by the time the voice faded away, Ed's had as well.

Silence from both brothers. Then, Al sighed, his breath echoing out from his suit.

"I don't even know what to say..." he said. "What about—"

The heavy sound of wheels cut through his voice, and I heard the shouts of medical staff. People yelling at them about how they couldn't just stand in the hallway.

The door to my room opened, a familiar metal hand holding the knob. "Oh, right." Ed's voice, much clearer now as the hospital bed rolled down the hallway, staff running beside it. "Sorry."

A woman who looked to be around my age gave them a look as she walked past, an air of authority about her. Ed sighed as he stepped back into my room, both hands finding his pockets.

Al followed behind, guiding the door and making sure it closed as quietly as possible. I looked back to Ed, surprised to see a grin on his face.

"So, good news!" he said. "Hurry your butt up and get better, because we're heading out with you as soon as you recover!"

I was ecstatic, bowing forward instantly. "Thank you! I'll get better as soon as I can!"

Ed just smiled at me, and Al suddenly spoke.

"You're feeling better?" he questioned before a sudden embarrassment came to him. "I'm sorry I didn't ask you that before."

I dismissed his apology with a shake of the head, saying how I was feeling alright. Much better than before!

Al nodded, seeming pleased with the answer. "And your hair?"

I remembered suddenly, recalling how Greed was holding me. My hand rose, unconsciously finding the roots he had suspended my body from, and my voice fell in a quiet whisper.

"Yeah, it's fine. Maybe I should cut my hair... So that doesn't happen again..."

"Well..." Ed's voice was a little different; like his lips were pinched together. "It _is_ a lot to cut off..."

I looked up, seeing his stare turned away. Al just smiled at me, eyes perfectly curved. My sight swept back down to my leg again.

"I should be walking around soon..." I mused, and a moment later an idea came to me. "But maybe I should try walking now."

Ed and Al both looked alarmed. "Uh, maybe that's not a good idea..."

I had already shifted out of bed, my toes grazing the floor before I tried to stand, leaning most of my weight on the leg that wasn't hurt. Sounds of panic came from the other side of the room, my name occasionally spoken in fear.

I put more weight on my leg, again having to silence a scream against my lips. It almost felt as bad as when I was trying to activate the transmutation circle on my shoe. Hands were suddenly on each of my shoulders.

"Just relax, alright?"

I looked up, watching Ed guide me back into bed. He pulled away before I was totally settled in, hands finding his pockets again. The worry on his face didn't let up, and I could only grin sheepishly from below.

"Sorry." I said.

He just shook his head and took a step back, thumb hooking out to point behind him.

"I was going to grab some dinner. You want anything?"

I nodded. "Yeah, just take some money out of my bag—" At his snort, I shouted. "DON'T PAY FOR ME WHILE I'M IN THE HOSPITAL!"

"All the more reason I should!" Ed replied cheerily. He shifted around, heading towards the door. "I'll stop by some nice restaurant and pickup their most expensive item. Something classy to go with the hospital food here."

Before I could do more than growl at him, he finished his wave goodbye and closed the door. Immediately, I heard wheels run by again, someone telling him once more to get out of the way.

"Sorry! Geez..."

* * *

A few minutes after Ed got back, the doctor showed up. The odd man held open the door as he poked his bald head through, repeating my full name in question.

It was more than a shock, to hear everything like that. I felt like my insides were glass.

I pulled myself back together, answering with a silent nod and smile. The doctor smiled back, giving a quick introduction as he walked up to the foot of my bed. Upon stopping, he turned to the right, looking to Edward.

"May I borrow that chair beside you?" he asked the alchemist.

I glanced towards the seat in question, my heart leaping in fear. Ed's jacket had been resting on it a moment ago along with the bags of food he had brought in. And now... They were nowhere to be seen.

I watched Ed sweep the chair to the doctor with a polite reply. The man thanked him, pulling up the chair and seating himself at the foot of my bed.

"Well, let's see how you're doing!"

He started inspecting my leg, talking about this and that. Things related to the surgery they had done in order to re-attach the muscles. I listened closely, trying to match what I was hearing with my limited medical knowledge. Eventually, I gave up trying to compare, which was right around the time Ed started peering over the doctor's shoulder. A smile twitched onto my face as I watched his head continue to poke over; first the left shoulder, then the right. The doctor remained oblivious, now continuing to inspect my leg in silence.

I watched Ed's golden eyes narrow in playful suspicion, stare turning to the bearded man as he spoke again.

"Well, it seems that recovery is coming along just fine! You should be out in no time!"

"That's so good to hear!" I replied. "Thank you!"

The doctor nodded. "The muscles need a few days or so to heal, but after that we can begin rehabilitation."

My smile fell. "How long will that take?"

"Hmm..." His hand made a gun-like shape as it rested below his chin in thought. The bright smile returned to his face as he spoke, and I saw a similar one on Ed's as well. "Shouldn't take too long! No more than a week, especially with the medication we'll be giving you!"

That sounded a little odd. "What kind of medicine is it?" I asked.

The doctor was standing up when I said this, his movements stopping and a look of surprise coming to him at my question. He lifted a hand in defense. "Oh, no. Just some new developments in pain relievers. Only the good stuff, don't you worry!"

I smiled, relieved as he laughed loudly. Ed stepped away, grinning a little as well as the doctor passed by. Before he had taken no more than a few steps, the doctor looked to my friends.

"Oh, that reminds me. Visiting hours are almost over."

Ed reacted like he had seen this coming. The watch was withdrawn from his pocket, our nation's symbol reflecting off the window's light.

I stared, completely stunned in a mixture of shock and horror as Ed started talking. Saying how I was involved in some _criminal activity_ and I needed to be held for questioning.

The doctor nodded. "Well, alright then. Take all the time you need."

He started away again, and as soon as he turned his back to Ed, the alchemist winked at me. I got the message, my irritation fading: I suppose I _was_ involved in some criminal activity. Even if I wasn't the cause of it.

The doctor suddenly stopped again, and I noticed Ed's face drop into one of pure irritation.

"My, whatever that place down the street is cooking just smells delicious!" The doctor smiled at us. "I just might have to go get something to eat when my break starts."

Ed gave a few horribly fake laughs, waving to him as he followed the door shut. "Yeah, goodbye…"

The alchemist set his back against the door, letting out a sigh. Then his stare trained on me, a mischievous grin on his face. I blinked at him, watching him stride over to Al.

"What're you up to, Ed?"

He just grinned as Al opened the lid of his front plate, revealing the bags of takeout and Ed's jacket. His coat, however, was reduced to a bundle, as if something was being wrapped around it.

My attention was taken as Al smiled, Ed putting his fists on his hips.

"Ha! And that guy thought he was smelling food from outside! Nice response time, Al!"

They slapped each other five, their hands sliding back before fist bumping. Al handed his older brother the food in his body, and I had to look away, feeling my appetite leave me at the sight of Al's hollow insides.

A thought occurred to me. "I don't have to go in for questioning, do I?"

Ed glanced to me as he walked over to my bed, mostly focused on digging the right takeout box out of the bag he was carrying. He shook his head at my question.

"They wouldn't take your testimony." he said, picking one box up and turning it over to see the writing scrawled on it. The carton was returned. "Past relations with those involved."

I heard Al give a low, short giggle and looked over to see his eyes curved in a smile. Like he was laughing to himself… Why would he be laughing?

Ed was blushing a little bit, scowling at the ground as he stopped beside my bed, extending a small white box with chopsticks balancing on top of them.

"Thank you." I took the food with a smile, watching him softly return the expression as he stepped back.

I looked down to the box, picking up the unbroken sticks in between two fingers before opening the food. The smell wafted to me in a burst of pure goodness.

"Ah, thank you so much, Ed!" I was practically drooling.

"Yeah, no problem." Ed fell back into the chair he was sitting in before, popping open his own box.

"Ooh, it looks delicious!" Al swooned beside him.

Ed nodded, agreeing as he pulled noodles into his mouth. "Tastes really good, too."

I suddenly heard the click of a pen and watched Al flip open a small notebook. One filled with a seemingly endless list.

"I'll put it down in my list!" Al was saying.

He had Ed recite the name of the restaurant before turning to me. He showed me the list, seeming proud of himself.

"This is a list of all the things I'm gonna eat when I get my body back!"

My heart almost broke but I smiled through. "That's wonderful, Al! What's on the top of your list?"

"Hmmm..." Pages of the notebook were turned over, his eyes scanning over for a moment before looking up to the ceiling. A finger was tapping his chin, too, and I couldn't help but laugh lightly at how cute he was being.

"Well," he began, oblivious to me, "I guess it'd have to be Winry's apple pie."

The smile on Ed's face flat-lined. He shoveled more food into his mouth, tipping the carton back. I turned back to Al, not wanting to question Ed's behavior.

"It's that good, huh?" I asked the younger Elric.

"Yeah!" Al nodded. "She says she'll have one waiting for us when we get our bodies back!"

His eyes descended downwards, a sadness coming to them before those lights perked up again.

"Oh, and Mrs. Hughes' quiche." His eyes widened, a hunger in them. "I'd really like to try that. The dish is really significant, too; that's the first time Mrs. Hughes' invited us over and the first time we met her and Elicia."

"Oh, yeah." Ed recalled. He was digging around the bottom of his carton with the chopsticks, seeming calmer now. "I forgot about that dish. We had that years ago."

Al nodded. "We should go back and say hi to the Hughes family when we're in Central again."

Ed returned his nod. He tossed his empty carton back into the plastic bag, and I suddenly had a thought.

"You guys found some kind of hotel to stay at, right?" I asked, concerned. Especially about them even being outside the hospital...

"Uh... Well..." Ed was avoiding my gaze again, searching the floor for a moment. "It wouldn't really hurt to stay here; spend the night together and all." He suddenly grew alarmed, and I'm sure my face was just as hot as his was. "NOT LIKE THAT! I mean, y'know, security purposes and all. Make sure everyone's accounted for and safe."

I nodded a little, understanding. I thought back to what had happened in Dublith, tried to shake all the confusion and horror away. I wanted to ask what had happened; Ed did say he could explain when Al got back...

But the elder alchemist was busying himself with testing out his bed for the night. He had moved the chair beside him, propping his feet up and slumping down to create a makeshift mattress.

"Yeah, this would work." he murmured. He suddenly caught my stare, and his expression grew nervous, hands still lifting his body half-way up in mid-test. "I mean, assuming you'd even want us to stay in the same room."

I blinked. "Of course." I returned, a little lost. "Why wouldn't I?" Especially after what happened... I was nervous just having Ed go out to get something for us to _eat_...

The alchemist in front of me was already embarrassed by his own statement, raising a hand to the back of his hair again, grinning as pink dusted his cheeks.

"Yeah, sure! Right!" He busied himself with sweeping the other half of his bed, the other chair, back to its normal position beside him. "Guess I just wasn't thinking!"

I shook my head a little bit, dismissing the apology he didn't need to voice. Ed cleared his throat against his metal fist, stare going to the jacket he had set on the other chair. He'd bundled his coat around something when he came in with the food, and come to think of it, he didn't mention anything about the alcohol he alluded to getting.

It dawned on me just as he unwrapped his coat from the bottle. I was such an idiot! Why didn't I notice before?!

"Ed!" I hissed, my voice a whisper. "This is a HOSPITAL! You can't bring that stuff in here!"

Ed just grinned. His thumb flicked out, uncorking the champagne.

"Ah, c'mon, this stuff is great!" He pulled out a few pricey looking glasses from the bags, pausing to wipe away a spec of food that had jumped out from his carton. "And besides, it's to celebrate you still being with us."

I couldn't fight the deep blush that swept up to my cheeks. He didn't seem to notice, focusing on pouring the two glasses he held in one hand. I held my breath, worried one of the cups would slip and break. Then they _definitely_ wouldn't be allowed here...

Luckily, he kept them both balanced and soon he was leaning forward, handing me a tall glass with bubbling alcohol. I held a sigh down; I'd never been much of a drinker before, but I'd had more with Ed in the past few days than I had... Well, in my entire life. Considering the frequency alone. It hadn't even been more than a few days since we bumped into each other at the station, and already this was my third drink and my second with him. I was a little worried about what it'd be like when he was finally legal…

My focus came back as he finished setting the bottle down beside him and leaned forward, his glass extending out to me. His grin became a bit wider.

"Cheers."

I tapped the edge of his cup with mine, the light clink ringing as I finished the toast.

"To a quick recovery!"


	11. Revealed, Part II

**A/N: I've posted a few new additions to** _Moments In Time_ **, one for the last chapter and** **one for the chapter before that (another for chapter nine), so check those out if you're interested!**

 **This chapter also includes a _MIT_ that was fairly fun to write, but I'll wait to ****post that on Thursday so I won't bombard you guys with updates :-)**

 **Also, quick reminder that I have guest reviews on. So even if you don't have an account, you're more than welcome to let me know your thoughts on the fic!**

 **Enjoy!**

* * *

Rehabilitation started almost a week after I first arrived. I felt awful about still keeping them here, but Ed and Al kept dismissing my apologizes. Eventually, they just stopped responding to them, continuing to sit on the floor or in the chairs with their noses in a bunch of books.

Al and I talked a lot, discussing nearly everything from cuisine dishes to which cat breed was the softest/cutest. Ed didn't add in much on that second conversation, but he chimed in a few times whenever we were talking about food. This always led to a conversation about the Hughes family again, and soon Ed and Al were lost in a cloud of memories with grins in their eyes and faces.

When the doctor announced we could try for me walking, I was nervous. I carefully got out of bed, seeing Al watch me from his spot against the wall. Ed had stood up, taking quiet steps towards me with his hands in his pockets.

The doctor was holding my arm, making sure I didn't fall as I began moving the smallest amount of weight onto my leg.

"Now, now, be careful... Don't wanna go too fast, now do we?"

I made a brief sound of agreement in my mouth, stare dropping to my legs. I'd been confined to this sack of a hospital gown for so long, and I missed my normal clothes... I suppressed a sigh, focusing on gradually putting more of my body weight onto my right leg. The muscles felt a little odd, but it made sense; I hadn't used them in a while.

"Looks good so far."

I watched the doctor begin to step away, keeping his hand under my forearm as he called Edward's attention to him.

"Can you keep her steady and have her walk?" he asked the alchemist. "I'd like to take a look and see if her muscles are responding correctly."

Ed just nodded, his fingers replacing the doctor's light ones as soon as the pressure had left. He smiled at me, but I could tell he was just as worried as I was. I kept pushing a light amount of weight on and off of my right foot, trying to balance myself and keep the pressure off of Ed.

From his place crouched beside me, the doctor spoke.

"Now, don't be shy, dear. Unless your leg is hurting, that is!"

"No," I replied quickly. "Not yet, anyway."

I saw a frown move to Ed's lips, guilt coming to my stomach. I set more weight onto my foot, feeling little to no pain.

I grinned, looking down at my own leg. "Hey, it doesn't really hurt!"

"That's good!" the doctor replied. "Now how about we try walking? Mr. Elric, could you do the honors?"

I grinned at him, the formality of his name seeming a little strange. Ed just returned my smile as he stepped in front of me, his other hand carefully supporting my arm as the one that had been holding me came in front of himself. It was a strange way to transfer positions, but then again Ed was kind of a strange guy. A wonderful person, but also a bit strange.

His golden eyes looked up to meet mine as his hand trailed down my outstretched arm. I failed to suppress a few shivers, and soon, his fingers slipped through the spaces of mine, gently holding my hand with his. I could tell from the hardness between my fingers that he was using his automail hand, even if the limb was covered with his usual coat and glove.

He squeezed a little, pressing our palms together with a grin. I noticed the pink tinting his face, and I was sure there was more color than usual in mine as well.

"Alright," the doctor was saying. "Now let's see if you can walk."

Ed held out his other hand, and realizing what he was doing, I took it, our fingers slipping between each other again. It was almost like we were dancing in a way, especially when he gently stepped one foot back; a motion for me to try and follow.

But I didn't move. Was... Was I really seeing that right?

I blinked. I _was_. Ed was definitely taller than me now, at least by a few inches. What... What had happened?! I'd only been here for a week!

He raised one eyebrow at me. "What's wrong? Is your leg hurting?"

I was still a little too lost to really reply. That didn't make any sense. I mean, obviously he's supposed to get taller eventually just given his age, but to grow so much in such a small amount of time?

The doctor called my name, the sound of it shattering my thoughts. I gripped Ed's hands a little harder than I should have, feeling his fingers lightly stretch out away from mine, a shout stifled against his mouth.

"Sorry." I mumbled before looking down at the doctor.

The bald man smiled, his glasses catching the light.

"Let's see if we can take that first step!"

I stuttered out a small reply, looking down at Ed and my feet. I tried to regain myself and ignore the strangeness of Ed's height increase. I felt the alchemist in question squeeze my hands just a little bit more.

Heat rose to my face and I looked up, seeing a soft blush on his as well. Ed glanced away from me, staring down at my right leg.

"C'mon." he coaxed, and a small smile came to him. A grin broke through, but I could tell he was just as worried as I was. "First step. Let's see if we can do it, okay?"

I nodded, smiling a little as well before turning back down. I stimulated my leg, feeling the light tension spread down until it reached my knee and then further passed. I picked my foot up, the muscles underneath and to the side of my shin tensing more than they usually would. Like they were straining, almost.

"Good, good..." the doctor murmured. "A little further, if we can. Let's try and take that first step!"

My eyes were on Edward as I placed the ball of my foot down onto the floor again, a little further than it was before. He looked up, grinning wide again. His hand squeezed mine, echoing his brother's verbal cheer.

* * *

A few days later, I was finally released. It felt great to be back in regular clothes, and even better to be out of my hospital room. Even if I was currently standing in the hallway with Al.

"Ed's not here?" I asked.

"He actually stepped out to go to the rooftop a few minutes ago!" Al said. "We actually didn't think you'd be released today!"

"That's alright!" I responded, dismissing the apology he wasn't saying. My arms came behind my back, hands interlocking as I bent forward, giving myself a light stretch. "Ah, it feels _so_ good to be standing again!"

Al smiled at me. "We can meet Brother on the rooftop, if you want."

I nodded, looking around for the overhead signs to tell me where the staircases were. Al seemed to know what I was thinking of, because he took a step to the left, blocking me from reading the nearest sign. He kept his hands behind him as he spoke.

"Didn't the doctor say to take it easy?"

I blinked, and then gave him a grin. "Oh, right!"

The elevator ride was filled with quiet small talk, a peacefulness that I had grown to feel whenever being around Al. He told me about how one time when he and Ed were traveling, he kept a cat inside his armor. He didn't realize it was pregnant; he just thought it was fat until there was suddenly a litter of kittens crying inside his body. I laughed at this, having a hard time keeping my amusement behind my hand as the elevator stopped and its doors opened.

The early evening light greeted us, the flat rooftop allowing a perfect view of the valley of clouds. As we stepped out of the elevator, I took in a deep breath, gently letting it out. I was glad this was my first real view of the outside in over a week and a half; everything looked beautiful.

Ed turned around as we approached him, shooting me a grin before his hands left the black balcony rail. He jogged over to us, grinning still.

"Hey! I didn't know you were being released now! Sorry I wasn't there."

I smiled back at him. "No, don't worry about it! I can see why you stayed up here; it's beautiful."

I looked at the sky beside us again, seeing Ed take a moment before turning to follow my stare. A soft breeze touched my hair, and I smiled at the feeling. I'd forgotten how much I liked the wind.

I noticed Ed turn back, his focus dropping to my leg.

"So you're walking alright?"

I nodded, picking up my foot and pointing my shoe-covered toes at him. "Good as new!"

"Great!" He laughed a little through his grin. "I'm glad to hear it!"

Silence fell between us again, and naturally my thoughts went back to what I'd been dreading since the date of my release was announced.

I briefly realized I was so deep in thought that I'd been holding myself, my knuckles lightly against my lips.

"What's wrong?"

I looked up, moving my hand away and meeting Ed's concerned stare. Almost instantly, I avoided his gaze, my own dropping back to the ground beside me.

"There's... Something I need to tell both of you." My feet were carrying me away, towards the balcony off to the side. I didn't WANT to walk away like this; I had really planned to tell them like it was a normal, casual thing. But I just kept moving, using my newly healed leg to face away from them, walk until I had my arms resting against the rooftop's railing.

I was such a coward.

I had to face them; I at least had to turn and look at them when I did this. The least I could do is see their expressions when they found out what a liar I was. I forced myself around, holding onto the cool metal bars behind me. My grip tensed when I saw them both standing there, even more worried than before.

"Al..." I began. "When we first spoke on the train, back when we all bumped into each other—" I was stalling; they didn't need this recap. "—I lied to you. I'm not actually a teacher."

I couldn't even say the full position title. How useless, how _weak_ was I?

Al titled his head to the side; I could almost see the question mark above his head.

"Huh?" he asked. "You don't actually teach martial arts?"

I shook my head. Memories began to re-open in my consciousness like a wound beginning to tear apart again. I thought these had healed...

I kept my eyes closed, trying to find a slight comfort in focusing on the side of my finger against my lips.

"No." I replied finally. "I... I quit being a student a few years ago. They..." This was so hard to say... His silhouette kept coming to my mind, and I couldn't stop the tears from falling. "They wanted to make me a higher rank, and I wanted to; I just couldn't do the training they were asking. Emotional work, they called it. Physical, I could handle. Tell me to do this, have me do that; didn't matter what it was. But tell me to look at who I was when no one was around, and I'll run."

I tried to laugh; tried to give a real one. But the sound was broken and cracked, only resulting something of a sob.

I pulled in a breath before continuing on, looking up to them this time. If I was going to clean my slate, I was going to clean it completely.

"I do still draw, Al." I said. "You asked me that on the train the first time we saw each other. I draw for a living, illustrating Alchemy books and sometimes other novels. That school I said I owned doesn't exist."

Al stepped forward, hands crossing below him as he motioned out to me. "But why? Why lie?"

I shrugged and looked away, faking what I could of a smile. I knew exactly why, and it was a reason I didn't want to admit to myself. Revealing everything like this was bad enough. Exposed the real me more than I wanted to—or at least, what I thought was my true self.

 _I lied because I hate myself._ The words perched themselves on my tongue, nearly slipping out. _Because I felt like I had to make myself seem better than I really was._

Tears were pouring from me now, painting the concrete beneath my feet with these small little dots. I ran my palms below my eyes, wiping the tears away.

I cry too much. This thought made me sob harder, and once again I felt how weak I truly was. I'd lost track of how many times I've made that realization, how many different ways I've made that discovery. It came all the time, especially when I was living alone. After he left. I would sit at the desk in front of that window, trying to draw those circles with my pencils constantly snapping from the pressure. My tears screwing up the drawings I tried to perfect. Blurring the lines again.

I hated it. I hated myself. Why wouldn't those memories go away? How long did I have to wait?

I had crumbled to my knees by now, and I didn't even notice Ed had fallen to his knees in front of me. I didn't even notice his hands on my shoulder until he clenched one of them a little harder. The cold metal brought me back to reality and I forced myself to pull in a breath. The air caught somewhere along my throat, my mouth open and producing no sound. Just hanging there, in the balance between isolation and foolishness.

He wasn't saying anything. He wasn't even looking at me. My memories of being on the train flashed, both of us in a similar position. Trisha's face came to me, and the emotional wound reopened, guilt bursting out instead of blood.

Ed pulled me into a hug, the motion rough. I knew he was trying hard, trying really hard to get me to shut up. I didn't blame him. These walls were built high, years in the making. It would take a while for all of them to collapse.


	12. Absence & Presence

He left almost two years ago.

It was an October morning when I came home from a light jog, setting my house key down on the kitchen counter. There was something off about the air—the emptiness that comes when a constantly occupied home becomes vacant.

The note was left on the counter, waiting for me when I got back. And I knew why it was there. I knew even before my shaking hand had picked it up, paper folded once in a perfect rectangle. The letter was short. Not even addressing me by name. Just telling me he couldn't do it anymore. Couldn't live with me. That even if I found out where he was, I shouldn't try to contact him, because we were both better off living our lives apart. In just a few sentences and a signature, he had condemned me to that small property with painfully big rooms.

I stayed out my prison sentence, knowing I deserved each second. I had done so many things wrong. I didn't treat him right; and it was best that he left. Better for himself, because he deserved someone so much better. Whoever he ran off with was someone who would treat him with the love I couldn't give.

I loved myself, before this happened. I loved my work, too. I didn't feel this **constant** weight gravitating me towards every floor, every surface. Holding me down until I eventually accepted it as a part of myself. I knew I deserved it, like everything else in my life. I knew I only had myself to blame. I'd hold that knife against myself for the rest of my life.

I wanted to tell them this. I wanted to say all of it. But I couldn't get the words out. I was too weak, completely unable to say anything. Not like any of it mattered. Not like anything I said was really worth the air space.

I had long since collapsed into Ed's embrace. I had no concept of time, no clue how long it had been. I just let that heaviness pour out of me. In tears, in gasps, in sobs with my open mouth against his shoulder. I could tell he hurt when I did this; his arms pulling me against him a little bit more. That just slammed a new wave against me, and eventually I could no longer cry. Just give these weak, pathetic moans against him.

He held me tighter, the side of his head shifting to move against mine. He called my name, softly. It hurt to hear it again, even if it was spoken that gently. Even if it was from Ed and not left out of that note. When I flinched at the sound of it, I could feel Ed's embrace get a tiny bit firmer, his mouth muttering an apology near my ear.

He shifted his head again, and I let myself focus on his presence as a quiet sob skittered through me, shaking out of my throat. I focused on the warmth of his body, the slow deep rhythm of his breathing. Gradually, very gradually, the feeling of him returned me to reality again.

My sobs stopped in my throat, cut down into whimpers as my eyes opened in a squint. My lids stung, the inner skin raw. I could barely make out the darkness around us.

Night time, the rooftop partially brightened by all the lights of the buildings surrounding us. I had cried until the sun had set. Completely wasting their time. A small hiss cracked out of me, a sob racking my body.

"Sorry." I practically mouthed the word, my voice reduced to that of a mouse's. "I'm so sorry..."

Neither of them said anything. Ed just held me a little tighter. I could tell most of his weight had shifted, leaning a good portion onto his left leg. His metal one. I sniffed, moving consciously for the first time in a while and feeling the stiffness in my joints. I drew away from him, slowly putting distance between us. He resisted at first, keeping his arms around me before gently slipping them away, sliding his hands down to rest near my elbows. His eyes rose to meet mine.

A flinch of pain came to my chest as I looked into his eyes. He looked like he was in pain, and I could only figure it was because of how my eyes looked. Probably so red, so inflamed. Like some kind of monster.

He broke eye contact, taking a moment to study what I knew to be all the different lines on my face. I could feel them. Every one. Lines from tears, lines from pressing my face into the folds of his clothes. I blinked, still feeling my eyelids burn as I looked away.

My gaze rose, noticing a large figure in the darkness close behind us. Alphonse was on his knees, and I knew why. I knew why both of them were so broken at my outburst. There was so much pain in the world, and they were powerless against it.

Ed didn't ask about my breakdown. I expected him to at least say something, but he only watched as I brought my hands to my lap. He was still holding my arms, his gentle grip staying still as I clenched my skirt into my fists.

"I just got out of the hospital..." I tried to smile. "And I'm already slowing you down when I promised I wouldn't."

"You're not slowing us down." Ed's voice was incredibly quiet; broken. He looked away, clearing his throat. "If we aren't able to at least help one friend..."

He shook his head, filling the silence his words couldn't. Alphonse softly walked up to us, and sat on his knees beside Ed and I. He kept his stare down, hands in his lap.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I'm not sure what happened, but I'm sorry it did."

He moved one huge hand, and I realized the offer he wasn't saying aloud. I forced my lungs to hold in a breath, keeping myself from breaking down as I reached out to his hand.

My hand really only wrapped around one of his fingers and most of another. I squeezed, mostly out of habit. Partially out of the idea that he could actually feel it. I watched those big lights curve into a smile.

"We're here for you," Alphonse said, and I felt my heart painfully expand. "I want you to remember that, okay?"

I forced myself to nod, glancing away from his face enough to see the soft smile on Ed's. That one he was always giving me.

I couldn't bring myself to reach up and take his hand in my own, but soon enough I saw his automail hand slide down my arm, fingertips hovering against my wrist. A silent offer. With my heart feeling like it was about to break from all this kindness, I slid my hand back, allowing him to cover the back of my hand with his. The metal fingers wrapped around my palm, still incredibly gentle. I watched, felt, his thumb move along the backs of my fingers and the start of my knuckles in a soft, delicate stroke. Loving.

I felt myself break, nearly cracking half of the wall I was rebuilding again. I forced myself to think about something else, and my mind went back to finding out what had happened to them. How they got the way they were.

"How can you two do this?" I asked, and my voice just sounded so shot. Like my throat had been burned. "How can you still go on?"

Ed took a moment, and when he spoke again, his voice was quite. He spoke with the same gentleness he'd put into moving his thumb across my hand.

"There's people that make the journey a little less hard."

I looked up, seeing his eyes still on me. Still giving that same smile. I felt like breaking down all over again, but for a different reason this time. I didn't know how to thank them. I didn't have to words to. I could only watch Ed force his expression to be a little bit brighter as I sobbed again. I could only focus on the feeling of his hand gently squeezing mine. A reminder not to worry.

* * *

 **A/N:** Quick comment that the line **"** Even if it was from Ed and not left out of that note" is _not_ a typo; our main character is breaking, and she's just desperately trying to deny reality.

Next chapter _probably_ won't be up for a while... I'm honestly very unsure if I'll continue this story. I know there's people reading it but I have no clue whether or not it's good, y'know? .-. So click the little button down there; give more me some feedback?

 **Update; 10/3/15 - Continuing on with this fic :-) However, the second part of the last author's note still stands; next chapter probably won't be up for a while. Our summary plot is about to kick in, and I want to make sure the next chapter is solid because it's super important. So yeah. I'll have it up by Halloween (end of October) at the latest! Thanks for the support - it really does help to hear people are enjoying this fic.**

 **In the meantime, I've started another small FMA piece. First modern AU I've ever done, and I'm really excited to flesh it out. On my profile if you're interested!**


	13. Down This Same Road Again

**_A/N:_** You guys know this story is a _pretty_ big AU, right? Okay; just makin' sure. I'd also like to take the opportunity to thank everyone for the favorites/follows/reviews; they really do mean a lot!

Quick note: while I do my best to make the dialogue of this fic grammatically correct, I should probably mention that any and all grammatical description errors, awkward word choices, and generally funky descriptions are all the result of _the main character's ability to write_. Not mine ;) (Or if you prefer to not read this fic as a "journal entry" type story, then the funkiness is her muddled thoughts/perceptions/interpretations)

So that's why the writing of this fic is so... Plain at times, haha. It's all planned and very psychological, I swear!

Anyway, here's chapter thirteen!

* * *

We had gravitated towards the middle of the rooftop, where there was a bit more light from the surrounding buildings. Maybe they thought I'd jump off the roof, if I was too close to the railing. I wouldn't, of course. I was much too weak to do something so strong.

My legs were shaking, but the more I walked the more my mind came back to me. Enough to realize why we were walking in the first place.

Al still held my right hand, guiding me as he took his gentle, giant steps backwards. Ed had both hands on me; one still clasping my hand, the other supporting the middle of my back. The thoughts that came to me were ones that rang out in their voice, some collective mixture of both.

 _"Keep moving forward. You're never alone."_

I nearly crumbled all over again. I stopped when their steps slowed, allowing Al to gradually sit down and move me with him. After a small, tiny squeeze, Al's hand found his lap again. Halfway down to a sitting position, Ed's hands left me too, but almost immediately, a coat was draped over my shoulders.

Warm. I felt the fabric curl against my arms as my knees came to the ground again, much gentler than before. But the joints and the muscles hurt, returning to the same position they'd been in for so long. So I shifted, folding my legs and crossing my shins and feet underneath each other. More relaxed. I felt Ed's coat respond, shaping to the form of my legs and knees. I didn't even realize his hands were still pinching the fabric by my shoulders, still trying to make sure it was on me as much as possible.

I knew I'd never be able to repay this kindness. Nothing could compare to that... Incredible sense of loyalty. I was a horrible friend; I didn't deserve anything they were giving me.

Ed was sitting in front of me again, fixing up the front of the coat and making sure it was completely covering me. His eyes didn't meet mine, and when I looked to them, his stare just moved further away, hands continuing to adjust, slipping down and making sure my ankles and feet were covered as much as they could be.

There was... Something different about the way he was acting. Something about his stare; there was a distance in those eyes, maybe a memory in his brain taking his focus. I wasn't sure how I could decipher that much. Maybe I knew from experience; the hollow feeling that came with thinking about something you didn't want to think of in the first place.

I pulled the jacket around me a bit more, and something about me moving seemed to snap him back to reality.

His eyes swept up to meet mine, and despite how much I wanted to, I couldn't smile. I looked away, focusing on his jacket; the warmth, the slight earthy smell to it. It reminded me of a forest, and I closed my eyes, trying to think of trees surrounding me instead of the desolate emptiness of the rooftop. I tried to imagine them with me as well, but that only forced the pain back in. Inviting it like a very old friend.

My eyes shot open, a sound balancing in between my tongue and the outside air. What exactly, I didn't know. A sob, a wince, a cry. Not that making any more noise would do anything. No _sound_ could take this away.

I almost started to really analyze what _this_ was, my thoughts dripping back into self-hatred and memories of dark rooms void of mirrors. Then Ed leaned forward just a little bit, just enough for me to notice he was there. His hands were on my shoulders again, gently resting and holding my arms. Once more, he looked to be in pain; I could see it underneath the concern.

"Sorry." I tried to speak the word, just mouthing it instead.

He searched my face again, like there would be some answer to solving every problem I thought I had written on my skin. I watched him pull away from me, sitting down beside Al as his hands came to support him from behind. His legs stretched out, probably to stretch the limbs that he'd been supporting both of us with for so long.

Ed broke eye contact again, stare searching around his coat, near my stomach, near the folds around my legs.

"I was five when Mom died," he began. "Al was four. We came in one day, wanting to show her something we'd transmuted, and she was on the floor. A basket had fallen when she collapsed, and... I remember how red the apples were. Like they were showing the blood that hadn't been spilled."

He paused, eyes shutting for a moment. I wondered why he was telling me this. But then I realized, figured it must be something of equivalent exchange. I'd opened up to them, so he was doing the same for me.

Or maybe they wanted to keep my thoughts away from myself. Make me realize how well off I really was.

"After her funeral," Ed's voice shook for a moment, and it hurt. It hurt me to see him like this. "We decided to try and bring her back. We studied, buried our faces in every single book we could find about Alchemy. Poured over every word, and eventually we developed..." His hand, his human one, dragged itself into a fist, and I could tell from the pressure that he was scraping his skin against the concrete. "Something that we thought would bring her back. Actually..." He paused once more, bringing a bit of air into his mouth as if it was suddenly dry. "Get her back, so we could see her smile again."

I didn't want to see him like this. But I still couldn't speak. I held the coat, bringing it around me a bit tighter. This caught Ed's focus again, and I watched his face relax. Like somehow realizing I was with him, whether it was a few feet away or just wrapped inside his coat, brought him to reality again. He looked away, and I listened to him speak. I didn't look to the ground like he was, opting to continue and watch his face. I focused on him, because I felt like I might break all over again if I focused on that darkness around us.

"After... The transmutation, after I bound Al's soul to the armor, we were visited by Mustang." Something of a smile curved onto his face, but I knew it was so forced. "Gave me my first lecture. Told me I couldn't just keep sitting on my ass, that I had to find a way to get our bodies back because if I didn't, everything would be absolutely wasted. So"—He moved a shoulder, his metal one, and the topic clicked—"And one year later, I was a State Alchemist. We had access to a lot of information about alchemy, stuff we wouldn't have been able to get our hands on before."

He paused, eyes moving to Al and letting his younger brother talk. There seemed to be some kind of telepathy going on, with how smooth the transition was between speakers.

"Our main goal was the Philosopher's Stone," Al began, and there was a sadness in his voice. Crushing the normally happy, lighthearted spirit his words always carried. "We searched around in libraries for some time in between Brother doing jobs for the military."

"Eventually," Ed continued, carrying my focus to him again, "We caught wind of some 'savior' in Liore. People were saying he was some kind of miracle worker, but that just ended up being a bust."

I waited for him to continue on, but he let Al take the lead again. Those bright eyes made of light looked to me, and from the corner of my eye I watched his hands move, giving subtle gestures while still not straying too far from the knees tucked to his chest.

"We figured out that he was using a Philosopher's Stone, but it was really just a fake. The town eventually got back onto its feet again, and a few years ago we heard it was doing pretty well!"

I smiled, holding back my praise of "that's good!" I allowed Ed to speak again, my stare turning back to him. I watched him lean back on his hands again, stare going to his outstretched legs.

"So we ran around in circles for a while, eventually breaking into one of Central's laboratories. The one that's been inactive for a long time." He glanced at me, expecting some sort of agreement. But then he grinned. "Oh, wait; that's right. You wouldn't really know about Central City, huh?"

I shot him a look of irritation, seeing that playful grin come to his face. I liked the look of it, especially because I knew how hard it must be for them to re-live everything like this.

I swallowed down my guilt, focusing on Ed as he continued on, voice solemn and soft.

"So we went into the fifth lab, and that's where we found some suits of armor guarding the place."

Panic raised bumps onto my skin, but I held my tongue. Literally, held my tongue in between my teeth. I saw Al's head shift downwards a little bit, a sadness seeming to come to him.

"They... Said some things that weren't true..." Al began, his hand clenching into a fist. "At least, the person I was fighting did." He looked up, looking to me. "He really tried to mess with my head, and I let him. I... Let myself be manipulated like that."

I couldn't respond. An apology was at the edge of my lips, but I turned, just seeing Edward move his upper body forward, sitting up and pulling his legs in toward himself.

"But you eventually snapped out of it, right, Al?" he grinned.

Al nodded, still a bit solemn. A smile curved his eyes as he met his brother's grin. "Yeah," he replied, "I did."

Ed's smile grew a bit softer, turning back to me. "While Al was outside dealing with that idiot"—I didn't miss the way Al's eyes curved a bit more in a silent laugh—"I was inside, kind of getting kicked around by another guard."

Maybe it was the memory of when he was blind; maybe it was just some pathetic attempt to try and go back and change that, rid myself of the guilt, but something about the statement—something about hearing him get hurt again—forced words out of me.

"What happened?! Were you alright?"

Ed nodded a little bit, eyes closing and head tilting to the side. "Yeah, I mean, I didn't get scuffed up too bad. Really it was just..."

His words stopped there, and I saw a distant look in his eyes.

"Ed?"

His stare snapped back to me, and I saw a bead of sweat run along the edge of his eyebrow.

"Uh..." He blinked, and then reality caught up with him. He turned back towards the ground, continuing on. "Right, so my... Uh..." His hand curled, metal fingers gripping the loose fabric of his pants. I noticed the hold become a tad bit tighter—angrier, almost. "My automail slipped up. Got jammed and stopped responding. I ... It really didn't make things easier, but I got out of there alive, so there's that."

I watched him, watching how he kept his eyes constantly away from me. Watching how his hand was shaking. His metal one.

Ed closed his eyes, seeming to really be focusing this time. He stabilized himself, both his hand and his voice.

"While I was there, I came across some Homunculi." His head rose, finally meeting my stare. I hoped he could see how worried I was. "The same one you saw, actually. Envy."

I tried to conceal my surprise, knowing how shocked Ed was at seeing that _thing_ again in Dublith. Everything he said was enough to make me realize they'd been enemies or rivals or at least acquaintances in the past. But I didn't know everything went back _this_ far...

"He told me about some 'project' that was happening. Mentioned me being a sacrifice." He shook his head. "That was the first time I heard myself be referred as one."

"A... Sacrifice?" I repeated.

"Yeah..." He glanced to Al. "We'd be jumping too far ahead if we explained it right now, but the lab got blown up and next thing I knew, I was in a hospital." He grew quiet again, the same type of silence that came when he talked about his automail being broken.

"A few military officials came in and asked us some questions," Al chimed in.

Ed grinned, and I saw the little kid in him. "That's when I did that drawing of Envy!"

I smiled, relieved to finally have context for that. "What happened after?" I asked, a bit more relaxed.

Ed's smile dropped, and I could tell his mind had gone back to whatever had been bothering him before. He looked away from me, pretending to clear his throat with the crook of his metal elbow as Al replied.

"After we told a few people about the guards in the fifth lab, Winry showed up and Brother got his arm repaired."

I didn't miss the way Ed's face clenched in the slightest amount of pain, or the clicks his hand made as it came into another small fist. I didn't know what was happening, but I wanted to see that grin on his face again. I wanted to get that relaxed mood back...

"So how did everyone react," I began, trying to keep myself cheerful, "When you told them about the guards?"

Ed took the bait I had set out, a grin hooking his mouth. "They were pretty freaked, that's for sure! I figured they'd run out of the room screaming, but they stuck around until I was done talking about the Homunculi."

"Homunculi?" I repeated, emphasizing the plural tense.

Ed nodded, a shy grin coming to him. "Uh, yeah. Sorry; there was another one with Envy, but they were both equally freaky." He waved a hand, shooing the topic away. "Anyway, as soon as we were out of the hospital, we kept searching."

"The lab was kind of a dead end?" I asked.

Ed dropped his gaze from me, arms unwrapping from his legs, hands supporting himself from behind again. He focused on his feet as his legs stretched out, his voice painfully quiet.

"We... Figured out how the Stone is made," he said, "Before we broke into the lab. The whole reason we went in there was because we wanted some kind of answer..." His metal hand curled again, scratching against the rooftop's concrete. "Sometimes... I dunno... I..."

He didn't continue. I had an idea of what he wanted to say though. I could hear the guilt, the regret in his voice. I'd be lying if I said I didn't understand the feelings. They were friends to me, almost. Painful, close friends.

But I also knew I couldn't change the mood this time. The air was too thick, too heavy. I could only ask them how the Stone was made.

Ed didn't respond for a long moment, and I saw Al's head raise. His eyes met mine again, but before he could speak, Ed replied. The elder Alchemist brought his head back, eyes shutting to the star-filled night sky. Clenching tight, and he spoke with his voice still a bit broken.

"Stones are created through human sacrifice," he told me. "It just takes enough lives; it's as simple and as terrifying as that."

I searched the ground near my legs for a long moment. I dwelled in the shock, the alarm and the fear of it all. I didn't even think the stone actually _existed_. It had been a legend for so long, and now to hear that fairytale actually become truth. To hear that dream shift into a _nightmare_...

Words failed me. Once again, I didn't know what to say.

So I said nothing. As simple, and as useless, as that was.

I listened, hearing Al talk again. I tried to focus on his words, but I just heard that voice of a child. I felt my heart crack, breaking a little bit more for him. For both of them.

How could they still go on like this?

A memory of something Ed had told me came back, when we were in the street lamp-lit basement after the bomber was taken away.  
 _  
"It'd take too long to explain... Just another recap of more failures from yours truly!"_

How was it even possible for them to continue surviving? For them to even keep _smiling?_

Ed called my name. I looked up, seeing a soft concern on his face.

"We can stop," he said, "If you want to..."

I quickly shook my head, wiping away the tears that had started to spill from my eyes. But I knew they had already seen that I was crying, realized I was this upset about their lives. I didn't know how else to express any of this hurt I felt for them. I didn't know how to take their pain away...

"It's alright," I said, and tried to smile. The corners of my lips quivered, and Ed frowned. "I'm fine. What was it you were saying, Al?"

The teen bound to the metal suit glanced between us, a tiny sound of surprise coming to him. A realization that he was going to continue, I suppose.

"R-right..." Al looked back down, gathering his thoughts again. "So um, after the hospital, we just kept searching. We decided to not look for the Stone anymore, and tried to find some other way to get our bodies back. We were also a little unnerved about the Homunculi, too, so we went and visited Teacher."

"You two mentioned her before..." I said, casting my glance to both of them.

Al nodded. "It was nice to see her again; we hadn't been in contact since Brother became a State Alchemist." His eyes shrunk, a nervousness shaking his suit. "But before we got there... Honestly, we were pretty scared."

Ed quickly flapped his lips, dismissing Al's comment as untrue. "Yeah, maybe you were, Al. I was totally fine! Not a single moment of fear in my mind!"

"Then who was hiding behind me when she came out of her house?" Al returned, a tease in his voice.

Ed's face went red. He looked away again. "Okay, whatever. So we trained with Teacher again, and got a bit stronger."

Al paused, seeming like he wanted to add something. But then he nodded, allowing Ed to continue on.

"And then..." the older alchemist paused for a moment, long enough to swallow down something he wasn't saying. His head turned, hand behind his hair. "While we were still in Dublith, Al kind of got kidnapped."

Al was instantly flustered, bringing his fingertips together as he shrank away a little, eyes wide. "Why do you have to say it so honestly like that?!"

Ed looked to his brother, shoulders giving a casual shrug. "What, it's what happened, isn't it?" A grin broke onto his face. "What do you want me to say instead? You went off on a field trip?"

Al looked away, giving a tiny whine with one hand against his face. I grinned, laughing a little behind my hand. I guess old walls were building again.

"So I tracked him down"—Ed looked at me, interest overtaking his features—"Back to the Devil's Nest, actually."

I had no idea everything was this connected. I resisted the urge to shake my head and start mapping this all out on paper, opting to give a nod and continue listening to Ed.

He looked away, stare moving back down to his feet. Solemn, once more. "And we saw Greed for the first time, too."

I remembered that name. "That was..."

Ed nodded. "Yeah. The bastard that was holding you by the hair." He was quiet, seemingly overtaken by some memory. Probably killing the Homunculus again. I didn't want to know the details of it.

Before I could get him to continue on, Ed shook his head, snapping out of the trance. When he spoke again, his voice was heavy; rough, with a pain that seemed too familiar to me.

"Tried to bargain with us. He actually wanted to trade us the secret of immortality for the 'secret'"—the word hissed out of his mouth—"of human transmutation. Like it was some kind of _cook book_ he couldn't find."

He softly cleared his throat, eyes closing and a deep breath moving through him. Something to calm himself down, I think. When he was better, his eyes opened again, and he kept speaking.

"We didn't take it, of course. Refused to, actually. A ... Uh... A few more things happened"—His stare was shifting to Al nervously, and suddenly he tried to grin at his younger brother—"How much of this does she really need to know?"

Al's eyes grew wide. "You started this!" he said, hands waving in front of him. "Don't make _me_ tell her all the really bad stuff!"

"I... I just don't want to screw up her view of the world! Everything gets _seriously_ messed up from here on out!"

"What...?" I said, completely lost yet again.

Ed sighed, relaxing and his hair falling back into place. He looked to me again, and quickly looked away. "Our government's not what you think it is," he began. His stare quickly shifted upwards, half of one eye clenching in thought. "Er— _wasn't_ what you thought it was. It's better now, 'specially since Mustang's almost to power." He relaxed and waved a hand, then suddenly looked to me again. "Don't tell him I said that."

I nodded, smiling a little. I held up two crossed fingers. "Secret's safe with me."

Ed returned the soft expression, nodding before continuing on. "So..." He grew solemn again, arms dangling from his crossed legs, metal knuckle of one finger scratching at the pavement. The rhythm stopped, and he looked up.

"King Bradley wasn't human," he began, but stopped instantly upon seeing how my hair stood up from the shock, how my hands rose to cover my mouth.

"Y-you're not saying he was...?" I couldn't even _voice_ the word.

With one hand covering his mouth, Ed swept his half-lidded stare over to Al. I could almost see his thoughts as words next to him: _I tried..._

Al tried to smile; he tried to laugh a little, too. "Well, technically he was _born_ human, but he was selected to become a Homunculus and rise to power as our fuhrer."

"One of the ways Homunculi are created is through injections of Philosopher's Stones," Edward said, bringing my focus over to him again. "He was bred for the task, and that's how he got to where he was."

I paused, not wanting to voice my thoughts. I... I didn't even want to know... But something inside me took over my tongue.

"What..." I shifted my stare between them both, "What happened to him?" I asked. "Why..." I forced myself to keep speaking, but maybe I was just stalling. I shook my head. "I knew he passed away, or at least that's what they said on the news..."

"Not sure you'd put it as peacefully as that, but I guess technically he did," Ed replied, a little thoughtful. His head was tilted, stare on the ground between us. He grinned, the expression bashful. "You mind waiting a little bit? If we told you now, this whole thing would just get even more confusing."

I nodded, unable to ease the knots in my gut. I knew someone else had taken power after the fuhrer... left... but I had no clue—I never would've even guessed he was tied into all this mess...

"So Greed ran off," Ed continued, "And Bradley cut him up pretty bad. Killed him, actually..."

I turned my stare over to Al when he spoke, noticing how low the lights of his eyes were. Even though he couldn't express very much, I... thought that... maybe...

The depression I thought had I felt suddenly fled, another emotion taking its place and lifting Al's eyes back up.

"Brother ended up in the hospital again."

Ed jumped a little bit, hair sticking up from the shock. "Why you gotta say it like that?!"

"Why were you in the hospital?!" I asked, hands in my hair. "What did you _do?!_ "

"I..." Ed tried to defend himself, one hand held out to me. Then his expression changed; a dumbstruck grin knocking onto his face. "Yeah, I got dinged up pretty bad by Greed, but don't worry about it!" He gathered his legs in his arms again as he said this, waving a hand to me before interlocking his fingers around his wrist. He noticed my expression then; how the alarm had given way to a type of sadness. He sighed, stare drifting away to one side. "I'm fine now, aren't I?"

"Yeah..." I sighed. I stared at the space between us, wondering why he couldn't heal before. What had changed...?

My stare went up, noticing the scars on his human arm. I'd seen glimpses of them when they had hung around the hospital room and he'd had his coat off, but I never stared long enough to really study any of them. Right now, the small lines were a little more visible, given the streetlights and Ed's proximity to where the light was shining. There were a lot, mainly on his shoulder and upper arm. Mostly just cuts of varying depths, but I noticed some that looked like burn marks as well. I... Recognized those, actually.

Ed looked to his shoulder, twisting a little; enough to try and follow my stare. I just kept thinking... Trying to figure this all out...

"What're you lookin' at?" he asked me quietly, and my name... Seemed so out of place in his mouth.

I tried to shove away the feelings that word brought me, closing my eyes for a moment before opening them again. Studying his shoulder and all those scars along his skin.

"Why did the scars heal," I began, "The ones you got when..." I couldn't finish my sentence. I didn't want to think about those muscles being ripped out of him again.

Ed seemed to know where I was going. He relaxed, hand returning to support him from behind as he looked down to his outstretched legs. Thought came in between his brows.

"I'm not sure." He shook his head, eyes closing. When they opened and that bright stare looked to me again, his eyes actually curved into a smile, a grin hooking one side of his mouth. "I guess that's something I really can't answer!"

I just shook my head, my mind still running in circles. Thinking about how his sight was restored without even taking anything; how the spikes he had driven into Greed a week ago _adapted_ to pierce through that strange armor.

There were so many questions, and I hadn't even formed a hypothesis for one of them.

Before my chest could sink any lower, before my heart could drag back down and crash through the walls I was slowly rebuilding, Ed was scooting towards me—actually _scooting_ up to me with quick little drags of his heels against the ground. The quiet smile on his face was enough to make me laugh a little, barely concealed by my hand.

He closed the distance between us relatively fast, and I don't know why I expected him to reach out to me again. Twice was probably enough.

We stayed like that for a few moments, sitting close enough for our knees to touch. And when he did nothing but stare and give that small smile, my posture straightened, not quiet becoming eye level with him. Once again, I mentally shook my head at the strange change in height. Another hypothesis I hadn't formed.

My stare shifted, flicking to his eyes and then the lips that were still curved in a small, kid-like smile. I briefly realized the curled side of my hand was still against my own lips, and I lowered my arm back down, resolving that he must have just gotten annoyed with my horrible habits. But he still didn't move, and I felt a smile creep onto my face because HE just kept smiling. What was he _doing?_

Suddenly, Ed pushed himself away. "Good; you're smiling again."

Al laughed; a quiet but full giggle that echoed out from his suit more than usual. A tension breaker for all of us, I suppose. I grinned a little more, happy that they were happy.

"So, yeah," Ed grinned wide, leaning back on his forearms now, "I wound up in the hospital"—One finger rose, pointed somewhere between Al and the sky above—" _Which_ was the first time we got suspicious of Bradley."

"The..." I wanted to call him what he _was_ , but I couldn't even get the _word_ out. It was just too creepy‼

Ed nodded, understanding what I didn't say. Al continued on, recalling the memory in a thoughtful voice.

"He basically told us to stay out of the way, that we 'should be careful which paths we tread'." The helmet creaked as he quickly shook his head, eyes closing. "I don't even have a spine and I feel like I have shivers running down it just saying that again!"

"Why did he want you guys to stay away," I asked, shifting my gaze between them, "And from what?"

"At the time, we didn't really know," Ed replied, rolling himself up to sit normally again. "But eventually we figured out he was trying to f"—His wide eyed stare swept to Al, syllable stretching out before he nodded—"F _razzle_. Frazzle our psyche."

Another joke. I laughed behind my hand, trying to ignore the tension in my gut. If Ed was doing this much to keep us smiling, whatever was coming up must be pretty bad...

He was still trying to defend himself, hands up and directed at Al's playfully astonished expression.

"What? I said _frazzle!_ Get your mind out of the gutter, Al, geez!"

He huffed a sigh, pretending to ignore how much Al and I were laughing.

" _Anyway_ ," he began, and then waited for us to calm down with a crooked grin. When we finally did, he continued on.

"He was trying to get us distracted. Question why he would barge in and say something like that; why he would tell us that just after we had found out Homunculi were real." Ed shook his head, giving a sigh. "And really, it kind of worked. We were really tripped up for a while, but there's wasn't a whole lot we could do about it." Ed paused, studying the ground between us again.

"This whole thing gets pretty messy from here on out," he said, "But the basics of it is this: Bradley was one of seven Homunculi, each one created by a... Wanna-be entity called Father."

I mouthed the phrase; wanna-be entity. I stored it away in the back of my mind, continuing to listen.

"Father was a... An experiment. The product of someone getting into something they shouldn't have, I guess. I never found out the whole story on that, but one thing led to another and a _lot_ of people got taken away."

My brows jumped; I hadn't expected that last part.

"Taken away?" I repeated.

Ed nodded, seeming to be thinking hard with one eye closed. "Easiest way to explain it, but even then it probably doesn't make much sense, huh?"

I shook my head. He exchanged a look with Al, and there was something in the air. Some _feeling_ or _thought_ I couldn't figure out.

"He basically created a Philosopher's Stone," Ed told me. "Using... Our..." His face drew into a horrible expression; one that looked like he had just ate something awful. " _Eck!_ I can't even say it!"

Al sighed. "Dad. Using our Dad."

"Not Father," I said.

"No," Ed replied, seeming almost peeved from the mention of whoever this was. "Not Father."

I was still trying to figure it out. "But it's your Dad," I said with a slight question in my voice.

"Yes." One corner of Ed's mouth drew upwards in a small smile, and I couldn't help but copy him. "Father created a Stone using our Dad."

Two different people. I nodded a little to myself, and then the engine of my mind suddenly stuttered to a halt. "Wait, WHAT?!"

Al smiled. "This might take some explaining."

Ed bowed his head forward in defeat. "You know the whole story, Al, but does it _really_ matter?" I'd never heard him whine like this.

"You just don't want to talk about him!" Al protest, arms waving in the air. "When's the last time you two even spoke?"

Ed made a sound with his teeth, rolling his eyes. "I'll send him a postcard next time I think about it"—His hands rose to his face, mock surprise written all over his features—"Oh wait, that's right; _we don't know where he is!_ "

"We know he's somewhere in Creta!"

"Ch'yeah. So he _says,_ " Ed scoffed, turning away. "He could be in _space_ for all we know‼"

"He'll come back for us," Al said, looking in the opposite direction. "He always does."

Ed raised one eyebrow, continuing to look away. "You wanna rephrase that, Al?"

Al's eyes shrunk, a little nervous. "O-okay. _Almost_ always." He turned back to Ed, who looked over just enough to meet his stare with squinted eyes and a frown. "For what it's worth, he came back to help when we needed it later on."

The legs Ed had bent dropped to the side, elbows coming to rest on knees and hands folding at his mouth. He smiled at me, but the expression was incredibly _painfully_ polite. They were trying hard not to fight in front of me, and right now he was trying to apologize for both of them. I just felt like I should be the one saying sorry; making them re-live everything like this...

"Wait," Ed suddenly straightened, looking back to Al. "I lost my train of thought; how'd we get to talking about that bastard again?"

Al sighed, but the sound quickly became a groan. "Homunculi..."

"Oh," Ed's eyes went wide, remembering. "Right. Homunculi." He grinned at me, holding his ankles and rocking a little in place. "Eight in total—seven Sins and one Father, who was their creator, not Hohenheim."

"Our Dad," Al clarified in a sigh.

Ed waited for my confirming nod, and I gave it. It was simple enough. Kind of. He continued on.

"Father's entire goal was to become God. And to do that he needed five sacrifices. Al and I were two of them."

"The same sacrifices the other Homunculi were talking about," Once again, there was a small question in my voice.

Ed nodded. "Yeah, back at the fifth lab; same thing." He avoided my gaze suddenly, hand coming to his hair, one finger scratching the back absentmindedly. "The project they were talking about; that was basically world domination."

I almost wanted to let out a small moan from the back of my throat; not only was this so confusing, it was really starting to warp my view of the government. I guess this was what Ed must have been talking about when he said he didn't want to really screw up my view of the world...

Ed noticed my expression; how my mouth was in a slight frown, open enough to expose clenched teeth. He grinned, laughing enough to throw his head back.

"Yeah, that's what I was trying to warn Al about," he said. His stare dropped to the ground again, and he focused on the space right in front of his folded legs. His finger began tapping different spots as he spoke, like they were points on a timeline. "Where were we? Dublith, Bradley, hospital... Oh yeah!" His head rose, the hook of his hair bouncing for a moment. "After I got released, Al and I kept searching for another way to restore our bodies. We followed a few dud leads, things that were really just whispered rumors."

"One of them brought us over to Meox, where we met Ling!" Al added happily.

"Ah, _Ling_ ," Ed added with a huge grin, "That crazy bastard!" The smile suddenly broke, and I imagined the sound of glass cracking. "He's never paid me back for a single meal..."

Al's eyes curved, a quiet laugh coming to him. "He did help us out a lot, Brother," he said.

Ed scratched the back of his hair. "Ah, yeah. Guess you're right. So many room service bills, though." He sighed. Finally, his focus turned back to me, and he began explaining. "Ling's a friend of ours. He came over here from Xing, wanting to research the Stone."

"The Philosopher's Stone?" I couldn't keep my mouth shut; it really wasn't a question that needed to be asked.

Ed was kind enough to nod anyway. "Yeah. I told him the truth about it, but he was still determined to find the secret of immortality. So he tagged along with us, bringing his ninja servants or whatever 'cause he was a Prince." His hand waved, dismissing the idea. "It was frankly pretty annoying, but the real trouble started when we came across Scar again."

"Scar?" I repeated.

Al nodded, and Ed filled me in. "Basically bad guy turned good."

"Basically?!" Al repeated, and I could tell by the way he had his hands up to his mouth he was playing around. "He tried to kill you, Brother—more than once!"

Ed paused, then looked away from his younger brother's wide eyes. He didn't really have time to reply before I was shouting again, completely worried.

"Why was he trying to KILL you?!"

"Would you STOP worrying about me?!" Ed returned, waving his arms with a scowl and a small blush.

I waited until he'd calmed down, realizing I had a small smile on my face. A grin hooked onto his lips and he turned away with a slight laugh, realizing my joke. But it still wasn't very funny.

"Why was he trying to kill you?" I asked, much softer this time.

"Um, well..." Ed gave me another grin; much more sheepish than before. "He was basically after all State Alchemists, given their role in the Ishvalen war and all. Nothing _totally_ personal against me, unless you count the whole 'atone for your Human Transmutation sins' thing. Then, yeah the guy had a pretty big grudge. Um"—he looked away again, and then after a moment, he sighed, expression falling—"We had ran into him before. Kind of literally, too. Thought it was best not to mention what happened..."

"What are you talking about?" I asked quietly, feeling a deep fear rise in my gut. "Mention what?"

Ed looked to Al again, a moment passing before their eye contact broke.

"It's really nothing you need to know," the elder Alchemist said quietly. Another long pause, and I could tell he was struggling. His eyes shut again. "I ..." He sighed, and just the sound sent a harsh weight into my stomach; the fear plummeting into sadness. Ed kept speaking, his voice soft. "Basically someone close to us died. Became an experiment because her father was an absolute psychopath. Scar killed them both."

Once again, words left me. Thoughts failed to form in my brain. I could only listen to Ed's voice, listen to him continue on.

"That happened a few years back, before we met Ling," he said. I could hear the regret in his voice; how he really didn't want to tell me anything about the girl. I understood why; I knew why he had held that detail back. My brain was still stuck a few moments in the past. Still trying to wrap my head around it all.

My self-hatred became a little deeper, cutting into me a little more. I was so _stupid_ ; why did I even press? Why couldn't I just keep my mouth shut?

I wanted to apologize, but my lips never parted to speak the words. I heard Al's helmet shift like he was looking towards me, and I felt my walls start building again. Becoming a little thicker. Calming myself down enough for the tears to disappear before they broke from my eyes.

I looked up, seeing Al's eyes on me and Ed's turned away. One arm propped against his leg, one fist covering his mouth.

"Sorry," I said to both of them. "You can keep going."

Ed looked to me, still keeping his hand by his face. He searched my expression, and I did my best to hold a small smile. See, Ed? Still smiling; nothing to worry about.

Finally, his stare dropped, and with a sigh he straightened his posture, arm falling back to his lap.

"So Scar came after me again," he began, "And Ling almost got hurt, trying to help. His bodyguard, Lan Fan, protected him, but she lost an arm in the fight." He bowed forward, sides of his fingers coming to run along closed eyelids. "We were in a pretty tight spot, and that's around the time Lust and Gluttony showed up."

Gluttony. That name _almost_ sounded familiar. I thought back to Dublith, back to that room Al was chained up in. There had been another Homunculus there, fat and round and drooling on himself. I thought forward, to what Edward had said about each one being a Sin.

My stare rose to the Alchemist in front of me. "Gluttony was..."

He nodded, smiling a little. Like a congratulations. "Yeah, that was the one we saw in Dublith."

I tried to ignore the use of the word "was". The chills shivered into my stomach anyway and I brought my stare down my lap, where my hands were resting near each other. Ed's coat was still wrapped around me, still seeming to be radiating the same amount of heat that it had been when he first placed it over my shoulders. The weather was warm, considering how it was in the middle of summer, but I wasn't about to take it off. It was a barrier, keeping me away from that edge again.

Just from remembering how they held both of my hands, how kindly they spoke to me, butterflies warmed my stomach. But I couldn't focus on myself, couldn't be this selfish when they were waiting for me to say something so they could get this over with and continue on. So I forced myself to keep thinking.

Lust was another one of Father's Homunculi, but what had happened to it? What had happened to Gluttony the first time?

"So what happened?" I asked, looking back to them both.

"They needed to keep Al and I alive for the sacrifices," Ed answered, "Even if that meant protecting us."

"We got away fairly quickly," Al continued on. "And Lan Fan got help from a doctor we knew. A friend of Winry's parents, actually."

I immediately felt guilt tie my stomach. I had completely forgotten to ask them how Winry's parents were doing. Before I could, Ed's voice caught my focus.

"Her parents passed away," he told me, my name sounding so delicate coming from him. "They were murdered in the war. By Scar, actually..." His eyes closed, a sigh drifting from him. "We found out a little while after we met Ling, when Scar showed up again. She was there, too..."

"Winry?" I asked.

He nodded, eyes opening to stare at the ground. I saw that tiredness again, the same fatigue I had noticed upon waking up in the hospital. Before I could even think about trying to give some weak attempt at comfort, Ed cleared his throat, straightening his posture a little.

"She left after Lan Fan got hurt," he said quietly, his voice a little distant. He blinked, continuing to avoid my gaze. "So while we were making sure she was alright, Scar showed up again"—He tried to give me a grin—"still hell-bent on his revenge."

"May was with him, too!" Al added.

I looked over to him, surprised at how happy he sounded. "Was she…?"

Al quickly shook his head. "No, May was just traveling with him. She's from Xing, and wanted a way to save her clan from extinction. She was tagging along with Scar because she wanted to find Brother, too." He smiled at me, giving a small laugh. "Completely opposite reasons! She had a crush on him—until she realized how short he was."

The frown on Ed's face was enough to almost make me fall over from laughing so hard. He tsked, looking away.

"She was a little brat, anyway," he said, only to get clocked in the head by Al's fist.

"May is a very intelligent person!" Al replied, ignoring the tears streaming down his brother's face.

Ed continued to hold the lump on his head with both hands, remaining hunched over. " _Was!_ " he repeated. "I said _was!_ "

With an amused smile still curving my lips, I watched Al's eyes silently narrow. He turned back to me, giving a smile and continuing on with the story.

"So, _anyway,_ " he said, "Gluttony became very crazy when he saw Scar, since he had killed Lust. Envy was there, too, the same Homunculus you saw in Dublith"—I gave my best nod, trying to keep the confusion away from my face—"And he tried to calm Gluttony down." Al gave a small laugh, trying to remain cheerful. "But it didn't really work, and he…" Al paused, then turned to Edward again. "How would you describe what happened?"

Ed pulled his cheek into his mouth, thinking hard. "It'd take some time to really explain it," he said, tilting his head to one side, "But the basics is… Gluttony was kind of a portal gone wrong."

As much as I wanted to ask what he meant by that, I waited, listening as he thought for a moment. His hands came to hold his ankles again and he rocked in place, small motions stopping when he looked up again.

"I really don't want to confuse you anymore than I have to," he said with a small grin, "But in the simplest of terms, Scar, Envy, and I were transported into Gluttony's stomach, and it was place we couldn't get out of at first." He paused, then nodded. "Yeah, that'd be the simplest way to say it."

"So you were stuck?" I said.

Ed nodded again, quicker this time. "Yeah, that's right!" He gave a small laugh, one hand bashfully raising to the back of his hair. "We had May's pet panda with us, too. And Al's arm, so we really had a party going on."

"How did you get out?" I asked, completely stunned.

Ed laughed again, still seeming nervous as he held up a hand. "Well, first off it took some time to get Scar to calm down. We agreed on a treaty; he could try to kill me after we were out of this mess." I didn't laugh at the joke, and he gently cleared his throat, smile dropping away. His hand fell also, a fist coming to prop up his jaw. "While we were in there, thinking we were about to die, Scar noticed some giant ruins floating around in Gluttony's stomach. Told me they were from Xerxes."

"Ancient Xerxes?" I returned.

He nodded. "That's when I really started thinking about who this 'Father' guy was. Wondering if he was the reason behind that entire civilization being wiped out."

I started to connect the pieces, slowly speaking the thoughts as they formed. "Because it takes lives to make a Stone..."

"Yeah," Ed replied. "So when I was studying these ruins, I got the idea to perform a reverse human transmutation. Transmuting living humans without changing anything." He sighed, and his voice became even softer. "We used one of Envy's stones as payment, trading out all those lives to save our own." He shook his head, like he didn't want to think about it anymore. "So we were able to go back, and when we came to, we saw Father."

"Gluttony was pretty upset about what he did," Al said, "So May and I followed him to where Father was."

Ed paused for a moment, seeming to be searching through his own thoughts, trying to pick out the most important bits.

"Ling wanted to become a Homunculus," he told me, and the chill that shot down my spine was enough to literally make the hair on my head stand straight up. Ed just nodded, understanding. "I tackled him and clocked his face pretty good." He glanced to my expression, still frozen in horror, and then shrugged. "So we got in a little scuffle"—he tried to grin—"Which in hindsight wasn't the best thing to do, given the circumstances."

"Ling was definitely a handful," Al agreed, "Even when we were all out of there. We talked to him for a long while because he still wanted to go back and become a Homunculus."

"Why would he want to do that?" I asked. Then the answer clicked; the conversation they'd had with Greed. He wanted to trade them the secret of immortality...

Ed nodded, seeing the expression on my face. "Yeah, Ling wanted the secret of immortality." He sighed, upper-body bowing forward and his hand coming to his face. "Even after Scar had backed down to heal the injuries he'd gotten from Father, and even when we getting May treated for _her_ injuries"—He glanced up, like he knew I was wearing a face of worry—"Nothing too serious. Everything healed fine." He sat up again, hand falling away. "Ling just wouldn't shut up. He tried to run back to where Father was and had his bodyguard, Fu, keep Al and I stalled."

"I created a distraction," Al smiled, "And Brother slipped passed him."

"Restrained Ling pretty good," Ed added, "And while he was tied up with the ground, he was shouting at me that I didn't know what the hell I was stopping him from doing." He brought his hands to his face, sides of his fingers coming to run along closed eyelids. When he spoke again, his voice was tired. And I felt guilt stir in my stomach; he was having to stay awake, trying to explain all this to me... "I told him that becoming one of them wouldn't do any good. It'd just throw his life away. Make him completely unstable and unfit to run a country. I promised him that there was another way."

"Was there?" I asked in a near whisper, eyes searching his face as he lowered his hands.

He looked up, holding my stare. A soft smile curving his lips.

"Always is," he said.

I found a similar smile making its way onto my face, a warmth blossoming in my heart, the space behind my chest. A dash of pink touched Ed's cheeks and he looked away, still keeping that smile before he turned to Al, grinning wide.

"And I'm really glad he took what I said to heart!" Ed exclaimed. "I mean, who knows what would've happened if he actually became one of those." This was followed by light laughter; mostly nervous, uncertain laughter.

"Y-yeah!" Al said, seeming to be equally unnerved by the idea. "That would've been pretty bad. I'm glad you were able to convince him otherwise, too."

Ed nodded, relaxing with a small breath out through his nose. He kept that same small smile on his face as his hand rose to his hair, eyes shutting as a silence came between the three of us.

"Let's see... What else is important..." he mulled aloud. His eyes opened and that gold stare dropped to the ground again, like he was looking at that invisible timeline. He pointed to a spot, near his right side. "Ended up in Briggs, where we tried to deal with Sloth..." His finger tapped the concrete a few times before sweeping over to one spot and hovering there. Quickly, he continued on, seeming to reach the end of the timeline. "Really, nothing absolutely major happened until the Promised Day."

I noticed Al keep his stare on Ed, hesitating for a split second before nodding once. He didn't say anything, and I felt a heaviness pool into my gut, wiping away whatever warmth that had been there before. I had no idea what had Ed just skipped over, and something inside me was scared to know.

I focused, seeing Ed nod to himself, looking over at the timeline again. Confirming it, I think. He looked to me again. "Yeah, the Promised Day is pretty much our last section."

I forced myself to not repeat him, looking over to Al as the younger Elric spoke. He tried to laugh a little bit, pointing a finger at me. "Okay," he said, trying to make light of everything, "If your brain's twisted now, just wait 'til you hear _this!_ "

I smiled at this, grinning and holding down a laugh. I saw Ed smile as well, and Al continued on. Telling me about a giant transmutation circle that had been set up around our nation, and how the Promised Day was basically Dooms Day - when everyone in Amestris was supposed to be used as Father's power source for him to achieve the status of "God".

"In order to get that circle activated," Ed continued on, his voice solemn and soft, "Father needed five sacrifices, one for each point in the transmutation's inner hexagon. Al and I were two—"

"—Teacher and Dad were another—" Al added.

"And one of Ling's servants was the fifth."

"And you become a sacrifice how?" I asked, trying to wrap my head around all of this.

Another look was exchanged between the two brothers. Al was the first to answer me.

"So," he stretched the word out, like he was trying to gather his thoughts, "The requirement for being a sacrifice is basically performing human transmutation."

I sat up a little more, shocked. "Your Dad... And your teacher...?"

"With Dad, it's a little more complicated," Al said, giving a small smile. "But with Teacher, yes. Unfortunately, she did." The smile dropped, those lights descending downwards. "With Ling and Fu..."

"We… didn't see it happen," Ed began softly. He was looking down at his feet, avoiding my stare. "We just heard Ling talk about it after the fact. How he begged through mouthfuls of his own blood"—His eyes shut tight, like he shouldn't have mentioned that detail—"For Fu not to sacrifice himself. It was falling into the enemies' hands, but..." He shrugged one shoulder; his metal one. "Fu couldn't do it. Ling was saved, and Fu lost both arms."

"Because of the transmutation?" My voice was distant, even to myself.

I had enough of my brain focused to see Ed nod silently. "So Fu became a sacrifice," he continued on, "And the transmutation circle Father had set up around Amestris was activated." He moved his head in Al's direction, eyes closing for a moment. "Before it was, though, May and Al had gone off in search of the closest circle. May could sense the presence of one; said something about it having bad energy."

Al spoke then, his voice almost like a relieved sigh. "May and I got there just in time, just as the nearest circle was lighting up. She drew a line through the mark"—He held the hilt of an invisible knife and dragged it backwards—"and it was just enough for the transmutation to result in a rebound."

Ed nodded a few times, and I think he was stressed just talking about this again. He swallowed before speaking, his voice shaking a little bit.

"Yeah," he said, "Definitely a close call."

"So what did the rebound do?" I asked, leaning over to rest my chin in my hand, my stare shifting between them. "It would've bounced to Father, right?"

Al nodded, and Ed replied to me.

"He just..." Ed raised his hand, fingers expanding as if making a small explosion. "Disappeared. Went away without a warning."

"He just went away?" I asked needlessly, completely stunned.

The Alchemist nodded. "The transmutation was screwed up enough for everything to result in a rebound, like you said. Whatever happened, I really hope he got his ass handed to him in the Gate."

I had no clue what he was talking about, but I guess being in that "gate" was bad enough punishment.

Ed moved a hand into his hair, eyes closing to rid the horrible scowl that had twisted onto his face.

"So after that, we dealt with the remaining Homunculi"—his head nodded to one side as he corrected himself—"Hohenheim did, actually. Made sure their stones were detached from their bodies. I did what I could to help keep Ling and Fu alive."

"There were a few more Homunculi that came after May and I," Al said. "And dealing with them was a little tricky, but eventually we got everything taken care of."

That phrase just made me think of what Ed had told me after I woke up; how he had "taken care" of Greed. Had Al...?

The younger Elric must have seen my expression because his eyes went wide and he quickly waved his hands. "N-n-no! I-I would never! Envy... Went out on his own..." Even then, there was a sadness in his voice...

"O-okay," I began. "What happened after?"

"I healed Fu and Ling," Edward said. He quickly shook his head. "Not in the way you're thinking of. Just sealed the wounds with Alchemy. After that..." He looked to Al again, who met his stare. Ed shrugged a little. "Things just kind of went back to normal, I guess. One of Bradley's fallen henchmen, Kimblee, had a Philosopher's Stone on him, so Ling took it and decided to go back to Xing; claim his place as Emperor. Took May with him"—I didn't miss how Al's eyes curved in a smile, just at the sound of her name—"And her clan was helped out."

He paused there, and that left one person on my mind. I searched Ed's face, my stare traveling to Al as well.

"And... And Scar?" I asked hesitantly.

Interested perked into Ed's expression, eyes meeting mine again. He answered quickly, leaning forward, gathering his legs with his arms.

"Yeah, he's alright," the Alchemist assured me. "Don't worry about it; actually became a monk again, after the whole thing with Father happened. He's traveling around the world with another Ishvalen. Rebuilding their religion and keeping the culture alive."

My mind left me. I tried to connect the pieces he just set out. "He... He was a monk?"

Ed grinned, like he was about to laugh at some joke I had just told. "Yeah," he said, the laughter riding underneath his words. "And he became one again. Full circle."

"Oh." I tried to shake my head, tried to get rid of the headache that was throbbing against my brain. "Okay." A few more words left me, an absentminded "Glad to hear it."

I thought back, rewinding and tracing through everything they had told me. But my mind quickly stopped about halfway through, and a heavy weight set into my throat.

"The fuhrer," I said, looking up to them again. "The new one... What about... Is he...?"

Both of them quickly shook their head. Ed was the first to say something.

"He's okay. We did"—Another grin stretched onto his face, a light concern in his eyes—"A lot of snooping, actually. More than I wanna elaborate on. Just trust me when I say he's not a Homunculus. He's just a normal guy, who's spent a lot of time trying to make peace with Drachma."

"But..." I tried to breathe, tried to get my brain working fast enough. I blinked at the ground before shaking my head. "What about everyone else? If... Bradley was..."

"As far as we know, Kimblee was the only one working with Bradley," Al said. "He's gone now, and we've done as much snooping as we can without arousing suspicion. We're pretty sure everyone's safe."

I tried to take his words to heart. I focused on calming myself down, looking over to Ed as he leaned back on his hands again. Listening to his words and focusing on his voice; the relaxed tone. Calm. Like how I needed to be right now.

"They've been promoting Mustang too, so I'm pretty sure that's a good sign. He's all buddy-buddy ass-kissing the Fuhrer now."

I almost felt a smile twitch onto my face, but another thought caught my focus.

"He doesn't know anything about this?" I asked quietly. My mind was beginning to pull me back, bring up a memory of the last time I'd seen Mustang.

Ed shook his head. "No. We've never told him anything about it."

The Brigadier General's words rang out in my mind: _"There's rumors of a Philosopher's Stone in Dublith. Figure you two would be interested."  
_  
He... didn't even know about the Stone...

"Why?" I asked, looking up to them both. "Why keep it from everyone?"

Ed didn't answer right away. Al remained quiet as well, looking down at his lap. The stillness stretched on, and my gut just got even smaller.

"There's... This feeling I get," Ed said quietly, and a breeze blew through us. Sweeping my hair in front of my eyes, tendrils moving across the image of him, momentarily hiding Ed away. When the wind died down, I saw him finish shaking his head, continuing to look down. Speak quietly.

"It's not fear," he continued. "It's..." His eyes searched the concrete, sweeping along that timeline, nearing the beginning of it all before looking up to meet my stare.

"Protection." The word fell from him, spoken softly but with an incredible amount of confidence. "I... I can feel that there's people I need to protect. And in order to do that, we have to keep everything a secret." He looked away, swallowing visibly. "I know, I get it; I understand how risky that is. But... I can't make it any clearer than that. It's like there's been something forcing us back from telling everyone."

He sighed, and I saw Al's eyes finally shift away from his lap, watching Ed move again. Automail hand rising to his hair, fingers sweeping into his bangs as his palm ran along the corner of his eye. Trying to wipe the fatigue away...

"And now..." he said, and a quiet smile curved onto his face. "With someone trying to _recreate_ all the Sins... That feeling is back, stronger than ever."

I tried to search the ground beneath us. Tried to find some kind of response or reply. But I felt myself grow so incredibly weak again. I couldn't help. I shouldn't even try.

I pulled myself into my own thoughts, trying to go back and make sure I understood everything they had told me. I skipped over the part about Hohenheim, knowing Ed's reaction to him and resolving that the topic probably wasn't worth bringing up. When my memory caught up with the present moment, I spoke.

"So what do you think is happening now?" I asked, looking between them both. "With the Homunculi and that bounty?"

Ed shrugged. "I dunno," he replied. "Maybe someone's just after my head."

I ignored the horrible twist that statement gave my gut, trying to block out the image of Edward literally having his head cut off from his body. Held out by the hair, like Greed had been holding me...

Ed sighed quietly, bringing my focus back to him again; seeing how he supported himself with his hands laid flat against the ground behind him. He was staring out into the city lights, a soft breeze blowing his hair as he spoke.

"My guess is that someone, somewhere wasn't too happy about us taking out Father. And now they're trying to recreate his plan to be God. The bounty just might make getting me a little bit easier." His automail hand came to his face, roughly trailing down his cheek and gently pulling on the lower lid of his eye. Trying to keep himself awake again. "Which means there's a hell of a lot more of them now..."

"There's..." I tried to breathe right. "There's more people making them?" I asked, trying to search his face for an answer. "More than one person?"

Ed avoided my stare, shrugging lightly. "Maybe..." he said.

"And… They're after you because you were a sacrifice…"

He nodded, the action just as quiet as my voice was. I looked to Al, my brain working again.

"But what about you?" I asked. "You were one, too... And they had you right there!"

Al looked down, thinking about what I said.

"I'm not sure," he replied simply. "I only regained my knowledge of The Truth when I blacked out because my body was trying to pull me back..." One of the hands holding his legs close to him clenched, turning into a fist. "And now I'm not even sure it's alive anymore!"

"Hey," Ed looked to his brother, Al's head rising to meet his stare, "Don't worry about it. You're still here, so your body's still back there."

"But you're getting taller, Brother!" Al responded. So he had noticed it, too… "What about that theory you had, with supplying nutrients and sleep to keep MY body alive in the Gate?!"

Ed looked away, thinking. His focus shifted to his metal arm, curling upwards as his hand drew into a fist. "Well, this automail I got when we were in Briggs _is_ lighter; that's probably a good explanation." He looked back to Al. "And I'm still getting just as much sleep as I usually do. In fact, after that whole thing with Father happened, I slept for a solid three days, remember? I wouldn't have been that tired if I _wasn't_ helping your body."

"But why hasn't it been pulling me to the Gate?" Al asked.

Ed was quiet for a moment, looking down at his outstretched legs. "Maybe it's getting enough human experiences so it's able to hold out longer."

Al looked to him, and Ed just offered a shrug. The younger Elric turned back, folding into himself a bit more and tightening the hold his arms had against his knees. I heard Ed give a sigh.

"So this bounty probably means there's gonna be even more of those freaks coming after me..."

The present situation came back and I shook my head, speaking without thinking first. "What would Homunculi want with money?"

"Dunno." His metal finger scratched against the ground, adding a rough pattern of noise beneath his voice. "Maybe it's not even the money; maybe it's just to see if they can do it..."

He shook his head, dismissing the idea. "Either way, we gotta be on our guard." His eyes looked into mine, that golden stare holding an emotion I couldn't read. "All of us."

I nodded, looking away as I thought back again. My mind went to the sight of Ed's muscles being torn from him, the pain of my own being ripped away. Did I REALLY want to get involved in something like this?

Ed must have been thinking the same thing.

"You sure you wanna come?" he asked me softly, and the sound of my name _—_ the sound of it spoken like that _—_ almost made the tension fall away. It was a strange feeling; a mixture of absolute pain and... Something else. Something much warmer.

I smiled, seeing his eyebrows raise in the subtlest of surprises.

"I'm sure," I answered. Tears suddenly invaded from behind my eyes. I brought my hand up to them, trying to force the emotion away. I couldn't even pin-point what it WAS. Just... This heaviness…

"I mean," A small, sarcastic smile shot into my lips, "I really don't have anywhere else to go..."

They remained quiet. Patiently waiting as I pulled myself back together again. When my eyes opened, I saw Ed's metal hand had clenched itself into a fist against the concrete; Al's head lowered a bit more.

I swallowed, focusing myself back. Trying to distract myself again.

"So what do we do now?" I asked.

"Well," Ed began, "Before that whole thing in Dublith happened, and before we bumped into you in Lauxotan"—he grinned, and I gave a small smile in return, enough to curve my eyes. But it hurt, just hearing the name of that town again… Ed continued on, growing a bit more solemn. "Al and I were chasin' after rumors of this amulet. Something that's said to be even more powerful than the Stone." He shook his head, growing even more solemn. "We haven't found anything yet, though, but I'm sure it's out there, somewhere..."

I knew what he wasn't saying. I could finally grab a thought that was hovering in the air.

 _"We're back to where we were six years ago."_

I looked away, searching for some words I could comfort them with. But I found nothing. What could I say? What could I possibly have to give...?

"I'm sorry." My hand clenched into a fist, and I felt even more weak saying the apology. If anything, they didn't need the pity. They'd gotten enough of it over the years, I was sure.

"Ah, don't worry about it." He stood up, getting to his feet a bit slower than I expected. Maybe his joints were still hurting from when he was holding me earlier. Guilt flashed into my gut, and I watched Ed give me a huge grin as he stood upright. "Nothin' we can't handle!"

A memory came back; when he was blind, and trying to reassure Al.

 _"Nothing I can't handle! I'll be back in no time, Al, just you wait!"_

He was using that same line with me, too?

I looked up, seeing his stare turned away from me, sight on the stars visible in the sky beside us.

I wanted to stand up with him, but I stayed put. Unable to really gather much of the strength.

"So what happens now?" I asked, almost feeling like I was a broken record. Half of that description was accurate, I suppose.

He looked to me, giving a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. His hand extended, and I took it, feeling the years worth of work beneath the warmth of his skin.

"We keep on searching," he replied as I got to my feet. "And we deal with whatever else comes out way." He grinned a little more, adding, "Fully human or not!"

I nodded, and after a moment realized his hand was still holding mine. I let go with an apology, only seeing Ed blush in response, hand rising to the back of his hair as he looked down and away.

Al couldn't hold back the slight giggle he made, and this just rushed more heat to my face. I closed my eyes to the chilling breeze of the wind, finding it had no effect on the butterflies in my gut.

* * *

 **A/N:** So there you go; some canon-diverging backstory! This chapter was an _absolute beast _to write, if the word count isn't enough indication (over 12k+ words, which is by far the longest chapter I've ever written, but that's probably a good thing lol). I feel like I just finished running a marathon, finally getting to post this. Back when I wrote the second chapter and kept Hughes alive, I was like 'LOL WHY NOT LET'S DO IT'

I had no idea just _how_ pivotal his death was and _how_ much the military was involved in the plot (both 2003 anime and Brotherhood, but especially Brotherhood/manga). Ugh. Did not stop to realize any of that, haha. So this chapter was definitely headache-inducing at times for sure, but also pretty fun to write!

Also, I _just_ realized how the title of this story can be playfully misinterpreted! _Plot twist!_ They're going to find Scar and leave him somewhere‼ Nah, I assure you it goes much much deeper than that ;) (for my early readers who saw the original summary, you know a little bit of what I'm talking about ;D so good on you, early readers! Good on you!)


	14. Playing Speculation

"STOP! THIEF!"

I looked up, seeing someone finish jumping onto the rooftop above us. Ed was already following him, spouting something off about how he wasn't getting away!

But when his platform deconstructed, there were a few sparks of red light instead of blue. I watched them fade, the pieces of sidewalk crumbling into a small pile in front of me.

His transmutation light had been red, when we were in Dublith.

"Al..." I began, still staring up at the roof like that would somehow help. "Did you...?"

"Yeah..." the younger Elric responded. "His light was a little red again."

Al raised us both up to the rooftop, where we stepped off his platform and onto the flat surface. Only to have the center of rooftop rise into a massive hand, red and blue light sparking around it. The thief turned around, giving a shriek through his ski mask before he was grabbed. The sack of money in his hand dropped, another smaller concrete palm catching it.

From his place beside me, Ed stood up, hands falling back down to his side. He smirked, kicking his weight over to his right leg, arm coming to rest on my shoulder.

He grinned at me. "What'dya think?" he asked, and a thin line of pain pierced the center of my heart when he said my name. "Pretty awesome, right?"

I looked over to what he was referring to; the pair of hands. He had added little details; tattoo-like designs running along the wrist, swirling along each finger. I bowed my head, turning away and failing to hide a smile.

"Yeah, Ed," I told him. "I like your hands."

I heard him laugh a little through his grin, and was surprised to feel a small squeeze against my shoulder before his arm slipped away completely. I blinked, wondering if I had imagined that or not. I looked down as his hands disappeared into coat pockets, like that would somehow rewind time. Or maybe I just felt like there would be some physical indication of him touching me. Some manifestation of the horribleness I felt on the inside.

I forced myself to focus, knowing I couldn't slip. Not now; not in broad daylight, with them here. I focused harder, immediately berating myself for missing the question Al had asked. I glanced over at Ed again, thankful he wasn't staring at me, thankful I didn't miss a question that was directed at me.

"I'm not sure why it's red, Al," Edward began, his head tilting a little as he looked at the thief struggling to get away. Al must have asked about the change in Ed's light. Good.

The elder Alchemist relaxed, sighing a little. "I don't think it's worth worrying about, though; it's really just making everything easier..."

"What do you mean?" Al asked.

Ed shrugged. "It... Feels like transmutations are a little easier now." He looked down, the space between his brows creasing a little more in thought. "Not that they were hard to do before. But... It just feels—smoother. Like taking a breath full of clean air after you've been somewhere totally polluted."

Al and I waited, stayed silent as he paused, shaking his head again. "It only gets to that level when it's completely red, though."

"But why would it change in the first place, though?" Al wondered aloud.

I had no idea. This was absolutely, completely out of my range of Alchemic knowledge. And even then... I wasn't even considered an expert. Before all of this, I had only heard of two different lights before…

I shook my head, trying to offer something. "It wouldn't have anything to do with what you're transmuting." I looked to Ed, softly raising a brow. "Right?"

I think he understood where my idea was going; a light amount of surprise came to his face. He blinked, then shook his head as he replied.

"No; it wouldn't be anything in the ground. I've transmuted other materials before." His arm clicked as he raised it, focusing on his gloved hand, stretching out his fingers. "My wrist, my _eyesight_..." His quiet voice grew a little strange at the end; a mix of confusion and repulsion. I didn't blame him.

I sighed a little, and then another voice caught my focus. The thief still being held by Ed's massive, stylized hand, desperately trying to wiggle out.

"Um, hell- _lo_?" he asked us, making me realize he had been blabbing during our entire conversation. I was just too far inside my own head to realize any of it. When we looked to him, he relaxed, huffing out a sigh.

"Gawd, finally!" He jutted his chin over at me, whispering in a loud voice. "Hey! Girlie!" he said. "I'll buy you some chocolates or somethin' if you gimme out of here. What'dya say?"

"WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU GONNA USE?" Ed yelled. "THE MONEY YOU TRIED TO STEAL?!"

The thief grinned through his ski-mask, and I think he tried to shrug because his shoulders twitched a little. "Hey, if she gets me out of here, I'll marry the foxy little lady." He turned his grin over to me, and I jumped a little, feeling chills crawl down my back like hundreds of little spiders. "What kinda rings do you like, darlin'? I'll get you a nice diamond one."

"P-please stop..." My voice was a wince, my eye twitching a little because this guy was incredibly creepy.

Ed tsked, dramatically rolling his eyes as he shifted his foot back. Turning his body enough to look over the roof's edge, search for the officers that hadn't shown up yet. They really couldn't get here any faster?!

"We really don't have to leave this creep-o here," Ed began, turning back with a bored stare.

"Y-yes!" The thief wiggled around frantically. "Lemme go! I knew you'd change your mind, a tough guy like you! Just do that weird clap and gimme out of here!"

Ed smirked, clapping his hands together. "Pretty sure you missed my point." He bent down again, hands meeting the rooftop's flat surface. With a flash of blue, the larger hand, the one that held the thief, began moving. The criminal's head darted from side to side, trying to see exactly what was happening.

"W-what?!" he said, beginning to wiggle so fast I thought he might hurt himself. "What're you doing? Where are you moving me to?!"

Ed laughed a little through his wide grin, the sound a bit menacing. The transmutation lights caught my focus again, as the hand stretched out above us, arm casting a shadow as it grew. I caught sight of pure blue sparks dancing along the limb, and suppressed another sigh.

I craned my neck, seeing the arch stop growing. I spun around, _almost_ laughing as the thief shrieked at being suspended over the sidewalk.

"H-hey!" he clamored. "N-not funny, man! Not funny! I swear, just lemme down, and I won't hit on your girl! I swear on it!"

"My..." Ed tried to repeat what he had heard, and I was too busy feeling my face almost melt off to see his expression. One hand had come to my eye, covering it, and after a moment, I parted my fingers, sneaking a peek at the thief again.

He was looking down, still seeming totally scared. But maybe that was because of the police officers waiting below.

"You still want me to let you go?" Ed called to him, perking the thief's focus.

"N-n-n-no!" The criminal shook his head. "Please!"

"Well." Ed shifted, grinning to his younger brother. "He did ask nicely."

Al smiled, bending down to clap his hands. With perfectly normal light shining through the shifting cracks, the massive hand uncurled, dropping the thief into the waiting arms of law enforcement. The other, smaller hand behind us launched like a catapult, flinging the stolen money into the crowd as well. This like, the thief, was caught.

"Thanks!" one of the officers called with a wave.

"Sure!" Ed replied with a wave of his own. "Don't mention it!"

I just smiled, hearing Al's arm lower as Ed's folded behind his head.

"We've got a few minutes 'til the train to Ebolas leaves." he said. "It'd probably be good to check out the shop he broke into; see if anyone's hurt."

"Good thinking!" Al replied. "I'm sure they'd appreciate the help!"

He made a staircase for us as Ed smiled a little, the expression soft as he opened one eye, looking right to me.

"What's wrong?" he asked. "You're quieter than usual."

I tried to hide my shock, but failed for the most part. I immediately shook my head, continuing to hold my hands at the front of my skirt.

"I'm..." I realized there wasn't much of a point in lying to him. "A little worried."

Ed gave a light sigh, striding forward and taking the first steps down the staircase Al had made. His hands found his pockets again.

"Don't be," he said as I walked behind him. "There's nothing to worry about. It's not like this thing is hurting me in any way."

Yeah, but... I held the reply in, not sure what to say in return.

"What do you think it is, Al?" I looked behind my shoulder a little, like I could actually try to see the alchemist behind me.

"You mean why do I think it's red?" Al returned.

At my quiet, confirming hum, I heard Ed give a loud groan. He wasn't enjoying how this conversation kept continuing...

"I'm... Not really sure what to think of it," Al told me as we all stepped off the staircase and onto the sidewalk. Ed and I waited as Al bent down again, deconstructing his platform. "I've really only seen that light with Homunculi regeneration."

Ed scoffed. "Ah, _please_." His hands rose high above his head, body mimicking a wet spaghetti noodle as he spoke through pinched lips. "Do you think I've suddenly become a _Homunculus?"_

Al's eyes shrunk, body still crouched down and hands on the sidewalk. "Uh, no," he said. "I just think it's a little strange—"

"Yeah, yeah, it's been covered." Ed pivoted on his heel, starting off in the direction the thief came from. " _You guys_ can stay here and play speculation. I'm going to see if anyone needs help."

I looked over to Al, selfishly expecting some kind of answer, but he just closed his eyes and put his arms out in a shrug. A silent _who knows?_

That was my entire view on this whole thing. That, and a steadily growing headache.

I walked with Al, heading in the direction Ed went off in. We were quiet for the most part, each of us inside our own heads.

I ran the side of my hand along my brow, digging my knuckle against my forehead, trying to ease the headache that had set in. Ed had told me not to worry, and I didn't want to make him worry _more_ by worrying... But...

I held in another sigh, trying to think about something else. It had been almost a week since I was released from the hospital, and we immediately started traveling West. Trying to get some kind of a solid lead on this Amulet. We were on our way to catch the next train out of Pendleton when that whole thief fiasco happened.

My throat suddenly became a little tight, and I tried to swallow, make it a bit looser. I tried to change my thoughts, too, but I just kept thinking about the one thing that really made me nervous.

No Homunculi yet. We hadn't seen a single one since Dublith. So what did that mean? Were they planning something...?

"There he is!"

I perked up, looking across the street and stopping. Ed was still talking to everyone, probably making sure nobody got hurt. I watched him suddenly look behind his shoulder, mouth moving in a quiet apology as he stepped to the side, allowing workers to pass by with a new glass pane for the display window.

My mind went back to that strange change in his transmutation light. I stifled a sigh, my shoulders moving down with the muffled exhale. Maybe... If he tried one more time...

I cupped my hands around my mouth, raising onto my tip-toes as I shouted to him from across the street. He turned, looking at me and waiting for my next words.

"Transmute something else, please?"

His face fell into a deep frown, posture slumping. Deflating the mood he had been in before, I think. I felt a pang of guilt; enough to drop my hands a few inches away from my face, lower my feet flat against the ground again.

I tried again, picking myself back up.

"Please?"

He huffed out a sigh, upper body swaying as he crouched down, saying something to those around him. Nothing bad about me, I hope.

A thought tried to creep up, one wanting to say I was just slowing them both down. I tried to ignore it, tried to focus on the sound of Ed's clap ringing out.

His hands separated, reaching out to the sidewalk. But before his palms had even touched the concrete, red light cracked out beneath his gloves. My eyes widened along with Ed's as the ground began taking a different shape.

Then a STUPID semi-truck passed by and I couldn't see the rest of the transmutation. Whatever he made was big enough to clear the very top of the truck, allowing me to see the skitters of perfectly blue light.

When the car finally cleared, I was staring at a pretty big statue of Edward. Striking a heroic pose; one hand on his hip, the other arm bent in front of himself, fist clenching. The actual Ed stood next to it, striking the same post and sending me that same grin from across the street. The small crowd surrounding him clapped.

I tried to force down my own smile, thinking about the small amount of light that I did see.

"It was a mix again, wasn't it?" Al sighed from his place beside me.

I sighed as well, leaning forward a bit. "Yeah... Seems like it."

My head perked up, looking to Ed as he finished calling to us, hands cupped around his mouth.

He leaned back, one hand in his pocket as he looked up to the statue of himself. The joking side of him was gone, a scowl replacing that grin.

A few moments passed before his other arm rose out to us, hand beckoning in quick curls of the fingers. Al and I exchanged a look, both of us a little worried, and a few moments later we were standing next to Ed and his monument.

"Professional opinion," Ed told me, my heart skipping as he spoke my name with those words. "Wha'dyou think this is? Go."

"I—I don't know!" I began, absolutely flustered and waving my hands in front of myself. "You guys would know way more about this than I would! This is way out of my range of knowledge! I've only heard about blue, yellow, and purple light before!"

He started to nod, the action cut short as he turned to face me with a look of interest.

"Wait a minute, how'd you hear about purple?"

I stared back at him. "I read about it," I said, then recited the title of the book. Pulling it from some deep part of my past self. "'Curses and Other Cryptic Creations: A Collection of Alchemic Conjectures.'"

Ed blinked, shaking his head before turning back to the statue. "Ain't that a mouthful." He glanced to me from the corner of his eye, a soft grin hooking one side of his mouth. "Your tongue tied after saying that?"

I couldn't help but grin, looking away with my head down. "A little bit."

Remembering why he had asked, I looked to him again. "Do you know about purple light?"

Ed shifted one foot back, turning enough to glance at Al, who gave a nervous smile in return.

Ed focused back on the statue. "Happened during the transmutation," he said quietly. "The glow started out gold, then shifted to a deep purple."

I focused on the ground, really trying to piece everything together. I tried to gather something, looking to him again.

"Do you think..." I searched his face, his jacket. Noting the coloring of it, and trying to piece together the right words.

Ed tilted his head to one side, still looking at the statue. "Maybe some kind of break down, between blue and red?" His eyes closed again, body hunching a little as a sigh left his mouth. "I really got no idea," he told me, and my name just made me feel a familiar, hollow uselessness. A tight laugh came from him, and he looked up to the statue again. "Honestly, I'm still trying to figure out how my sight was transmuted back in the first place."

"Yeah..." Al sighed. "That's when it all started..."

It wouldn't have anything to do with the bomb... Right?

I voiced this thought, holding back the small question at the end.

They both paused, and then Ed looked away from me again, giving a shrug. "Maybe some kind of chemical imbalance? But that wouldn't really make much sense; not enough to randomly effect my transmutations."

"Are you sure it's random?" Al asked. "Are there any differences between the times it's red, and the times it's normal?"

Edward shook his head. "Nothin' I can think of."

He looked up to the statue again, mouth twisting into a strange, tight frown as he shifted his weight to one leg. His metal one. The click hung in the silence between us, and finally Ed gave another small sigh.

"I'm sure it's nothing to worry about," he said quietly. He flipped open his pocket watch, the ticking growing a little louder as the face was exposed. "12:50. We should probably get going."

I caught sight of something on the other side of the watch; something deeply scratched inside the lid. I immediately looked away, hearing the watch snap shut again, chain jingling as it was pocketed.

Another thing I didn't need to shove my nose into.

As Ed pivoted around, Al looked up at his brother's monument. "We should probably take the statue down before we leave..."

"Really?" Ed turned back again, regarding himself as well. "I was thinking I'd leave it up. Thought it'd make a good centerpiece for the store."

Al and I both watched, in some mixture of amusement and embarrassment, as Ed put a hand to the statue's base and covered his mouth with the other one, failing to suppress a small little choked sob. Fake tears rained down his face.

"I can't take it down, Al," he said. "It's just so beautiful."

My amusement was concealed by my hand, like always, and Al's rang clear from his suit. Ed grinned, breaking away from the joking persona long enough to clap and deconstruct the statue.

I was glad his mood was back to normal. I found myself smiling a little as we started in the direction of the train station again, walking in between both of them as light conversation floated around me. Talk of where we would go next and plans for the next few days.

Edward motioned with his head, lightly regarding the shop we had just left. "I was talking with someone over there who said something about Lacco, and then his friend joined in and said his cousin heard a rumor about a 'magic' Amulet in Neug. So I guess we can hit those after Ebolas."

I nodded, taking in what I had just heard. "Nothing about what it actually does, though?"

He shook his head. "We've heard a lot of different things. It's 'magic', it's a way to raise the dead, it'll make your car sparkly clean." He rolled his eyes at the last one, and I laughed. "I'm pretty sure someone was confusing that one for an advertisement they heard, but so far, all we know for sure is that it's supposed to be incredibly powerful and it's really hard to find." A quiet, defeated grin came to him as he relaxed, and for some reason I almost imagined him to have pointed teeth. "Just like the Stone was..."

"But we found that to be real, too!" Al pointed out happily.

"Yeah, for better or worse, I guess."

We kept walking, and I was lost in my own thoughts again. Wondering how I could help them at all. Wondering if I should even try to.

 _There's nothing else for me to do..._

"So." Ed's feet stopped, and I halted with him to see we were at the station. The track in front of us empty, waiting to be covered by the train. "This is it. Ebolas, here we come."

He was trying to keep himself happy, and I had to smile a little at the effort. I looked over at him, wanting to say something, when suddenly Al stretched his hand out, hovering it a little above Ed's bangs.

Ed looked to his hand, blinking once. "What're you up to, Al?"

"Brother... You've grown taller!"

Ed hesitated for a moment. His eyes flicked to me, to the top of my head, and he realized Al was right. A giant, beaming grin came to his face.

"I have, haven't I?" he bragged, chest puffing out a little more. His hands came back to his pockets, eyes closing as his head turned down and away. "It's about time things start changin' around here!"

He looked to me again, still incredibly happy. "How's the view from down there? Lemme know if you need help reaching any high shelves or anything, alright?"

He kept rambling on, and I laughed a little, wanting to tell him he had _only_ grown a few inches at the most. But he was happy, and that was enough to keep me quiet.

The train rolled up a little while later, and I stepped on board feeling a little lighter than usual. Maybe Ed's mood was just contagious.

A few minutes after the train began moving again, however, I noticed that wide grin of his had faded.

I glanced over at him again, shifting my stare to Al and silently excusing myself from the conversation we were just having. I leaned forward, wanting to reach across the booth diagonally and catch Edward's focus that way, but I stopped. Thinking better of it.

Before I could say anything, Ed moved his stare away from the floor. He looked right to me, and I saw the fear in his eyes. Making them look a little hollow. Making them feel a little too familiar.

"That Homunculus," he began, his voice quiet. "The one back in Dublith. The one who could rip muscles." He paused, stare flicking to my lips so fast I wasn't sure I had seen his eyes move. "How could she do that? They..." He looked away again, avoiding my stare. "Homunculi _can't perform alchemy..._ "

I leaned back into my chair, realizing what he was saying. A little bit.

"So she couldn't have been transmuting..." I repeated in a mumble. I looked up, looking to both of them as I grew confused. "How is a Homunculus made?" I asked, trying not to let my embarrassment for my lack of knowledge and guilt show. "I know the speculations, but..."

Ed seemed to get out of that strange state of fear he was in before; he and Al shared a glance, and then Ed grinned at me sheepishly.

"We're... Actually not a-hundred-percent sure," he said.

The shock was enough to make my head hang in defeat. I was expecting an _actual_ answer...

"But," Al interjected with a raised finger, "we _do_ know that the seven Sins came from Father!"

"Wait." I sat up again, looking to Ed even more confused than ever. "I thought Father was a Homunculus, too..."

This time, realization knocked into Edward's face, hanging his head to the side. "Guess I did say that, huh? 'Eight Homunculi, seven Sins and one Father.' Sorry." He grinned, relaxing again. "I was using the term pretty loosely, just going with the definition of 'artificial human'."

"Oh." I felt heat rise to my cheeks, embarrassed again for looking so foolish. I looked back to Al. "But you don't know where Father came from," I put a slight question in my voice.

Al shook his head. "We know he had been around for a long time, and he had the ability to try and make a Gate."

Okay, now I was definitely completely confused.

"A Gate?"

Ed had seen this question coming; he shifted, legs crossing as he rested his elbows on the top knee, hands coming to support his chin.

"Yeah," he replied. "Goes back to human transmutation." He grinned, a little nervous. "Which... Is definitely something that takes a while to explain."

Before I could back out, lean into my seat and tell them they didn't have to, Ed waved a hand at me. "Don't worry; we'll make it quick."

"There's... A _place_ we went to, when we tried to bring Mom back," Al said. "It was white, and there was..." He looked to Ed, who met his stare. "Some _one_? Some _thing_ there?"

"A bit of both, I think." Ed nodded. He shifted in his seat again, hands relaxing to curl in front of himself; like he was trying to hold the idea he had in place. "So, when we tried... To do what we did, we were transported somewhere, like Al said."

That cleared things up, a little bit, but also brought more questions.

"You were taken somewhere," I began, "because you tried to do human transmutation?"

Ed nodded, hands coming to his lap again. "Yeah, basically. It's part of the trade..." His stare dropped away from me, voice growing solemn as he added, "The rebound, actually." His head shook, wiping the thought away. "But, anyway, this place is white, and it... Feels like you're in-between."

In-between _what?_ I tilted my head, wanting to ask him to continue on. But then I realized what he was saying.

"Like you're in limbo?" I asked.

Ed nodded. His stare fell back to the floor again, focusing a bit more. "It's strange, to say the least. Like you're weightless, but there's something grounding you at the same time. There's still something connecting you to everything else."

Al stayed quiet, seeming like he was listening to his brother just as much as I was. I swept my gaze back to Ed, watching the Alchemist lean back, head towards the ceiling as he sighed.

"And... There's a gate there, when you show up. It's pretty big, and it's the reason we can do Alchemy."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I repeating the phrase back to him, blinking. "B-because of a Gate...?"

He nodded, and then the solemn demeanor broke with a grin. "Yeah, sounds pretty darn crazy, doesn't it?" He laughed, and Al nervously gave a lighter giggle. I smiled a little, ready for them to tell me it was all a joke.

But they didn't.

"You're..." I felt the blood drain from my head. "You're being serious."

Al hummed as he nodded. "That's right!"

I tried to smile, picking myself up from my seat for a brief moment; shifting a little. Trying for a distraction, I guess. "T-there's... No way..." I swallowed, trying to gather the right words. I dropped my stare to the floor beneath us, like that would somehow help. "How…" I focused a bit more, trying to think right. One side of my lip twitched in a shaky smile. "Would you even know…?"

When no response came, I forced myself to look up, seeing Ed share a glance with Al. The elder Alchemist looked to me again, giving a brief shrug.

"Intuition, I guess. Or..." He looked away, staring off to the side as a slight blush tinted his cheeks. "I guess it's like recognizing an old friend. You just know."

I felt a tiny bit of heat come to my own face as well. Ed softly shook his head, throat clearing before he grinned his blush away.

"Anyway! There was something else there, too!"

I looked over to Al again. "That's what you were talking about, right?"

Al nodded. He turned to Edward again. "You'd know more about it than I would. You spoke with them longer."

"Ah, yeah," Ed replied. "Guess I did, didn't I?"

It— _they_ —could talk?

"You talked?" I asked, then realized I should probably try to add more. "With...?"

"It wasn't for very long," Edward said, "just enough to get an idea of... _What_ I was talking to. And even then, at the time, it was pretty confusing." He shook his head, eyes shutting and remaining closed as he continued on, the space between his brows pinched. "Started their introduction saying, 'I... am _you_.' Told me it was _Truth_ ; that it was every _one_ and every _thing_."

"I..." Al looked down, seeming to be studying his lap. "Think I remember something like that." He tried to laugh a little, shoulders twitching in a brief shrug. "Everything happened so fast! It was hard to tell exactly what was going on."

"Do you remember what it said?" I asked him.

He paused again, shaking his head. "Not really. Like Brother said, they told me _they_ were me. And then... They told me to remember what I was going to feel."

"What... You were going to feel?" I asked.

Al nodded, and a part of me still couldn't believe this. Some thought must have escaped from my brain; moving my lips in a barely audible, "This is absolutely insane..."

I caught sight of Ed shrugging, still lounging in his own seat. "Hopefully you never have to find out for yourself," he told me. And the sound of my name brought me back to reality again; the present moment, why we were talking about this in the first place.

"Okay," I began, "so what happened after? With the Gate and Truth?"

Ed looked to his younger brother again, and briefly uncurled and curled his fingers in a wave. "Truth waved," he said, looking back to me. He tried to grin. "And that's when everything just got really painful."

My hair almost stood up in complete shock, I was so surprised. I kept my hands covering my mouth, eyes wide. "What happened?!"

"Well..." He raised a hand to the back of his hair, scratching a little in thought as he looked away. "I saw The Truth"—He glanced at me, pausing before grinning sheepishly—"Different type of Truth. It's confusing, I know."

I smiled a little bit, trying to return his expression. Ed lowered his hand back down to the armrest, looking down and shrugging.

"Guess if I had to explain it simply, it'd be just that; the truth. Everything anyone could know about Alchemy." He shook his head, eyes closing again. "It _poured_ into me. I thought my head was going to explode, trying to keep in all that knowledge." His hand ran along one closed eye, like his head was hurting right now. I hoped that it wasn't; that my question wasn't the cause of the pain...

"Right when I thought I had it," he said with a tight, almost inaudible laugh, "The _one_ thing we were missing..." His hand came to support the side of his head again, his other one reaching out, fingertips straining towards the empty seat beside me. Reaching for something I couldn't see.

"I was kicked out." The hand dropped back down to his lap. "Never saw what was in there. Waiting."

I didn't know what to say. I watched his stare remain on the floor between us, expression concentrated in thought. "Paid my leg to see everything, too." His head shook, eyes rising to smile at me. With a grin, he continued, "Gave my arm to get Al into that suit, and well, you already know the rest!"

I nodded, offering another small smile. It was the best I could do, given the topic.

"So," Al began lightly, "to loop back to the original conversation, Homunculi are missing a Gate, and that's why they're incapable of performing alchemy."

"Okay," I said quietly, still feeling my head hurt a little.

Looking away, I thought back to what we had just spoke about a few minutes ago; how that... Blonde Homunculus could do what she did. An idea popped into my head, and hesitantly I looked to them both.

"So... Homunculi can't reproduce?"

Ed raised one eyebrow, confused. A small blush crept onto his face. "Where's your train of thought headed?" he asked me.

I couldn't help but smile at him, holding down a laugh because we actually _were_ on a train. I saw the realization dawn on him as well, earning me a smile back. I relaxed, the situation a little less tense as I answered him.

"Well, I was thinking something along the lines of evolution," I said. "But I guess that's a little silly, isn't it?"

Ed scratched the back of his hair, stare on the floor beneath us. "I dunno," he began slowly. "Maybe not, but it'd still take a long time for a Gate to form through natural selection"—His face twisted in a look of disgust—"even if they _were_ to breed with full-on Alchemists. Eck." His head shook, blurring his face for a moment and wiping the thought away. I grinned a little, raising the side of a curled hand to my lips.

"It _would_ take a long time," Al agreed, tapping his chin in thought, "but that reminds me of some speculations I read about Homunculi creation."

"What are they?" I asked.

Al pretended to scratch the side of his face, eyes avoiding mine. "Well, they're actually off of a few books I read on The Truth."

"Not..." The space between my brows clenched a little in confusion. "That... Thing you spoke with, right?"

Al quickly shook his head. "No, what Brother was talking about."

I glanced to Edward, watching his eyes sweep over to meet mine as I added, "The 'knowing everything about Alchemy' truth?"

Ed nodded silently, and Al brought my attention back to him. He was tapping his chin with his finger again, voice soft with thought.

"My suggestion is basically off of a folklore that's been around for the past hundred years or so," he began. "It states that Homunculi are simply people from different dimensions. They're teleported here from somewhere else through the Gate, and they use something that's not alchemy in order to manipulate their bodies. So, in other words, they use their universe's version of alchemy—or their own version of The Truth."

Ed snorted as he laughed, trying to cover his mouth up with one hand. He opened one eye, smiling a little more when he noticed me staring.

He shook his head. "I'm sorry; I just can't keep a straight face whenever I hear that one." His fingers curled into a fist as his eyes clenched shut, a slight giggle escaping him. "I mean"—He bowed his head a little more, and I wouldn't be surprised to see tears brimming his eyes if he opened them—"teleported through the _Gate_? What do you have to be smoking to think that up?"

I grinned, just because he was laughing so much. "That... Is a little far-fetched."

Ed shook his head again, trying to keep himself under control. "Keep goin', Al. Let's veto that one for now."

Interest perked my mind into working a little harder, and I turned back to Al again, watching him nod in return.

"Yeah, okay," Al replied. He smiled at me. "That one is a little bit crazy, but I have another one that might make a bit more sense."

"What is it?" I asked.

"It's only another hypothesis," he began, "but it does deal with an altered form of human transmutation and Homunculi generation. It states that the power a Homunculus gets is related to their cause of death. So, for example, the Homunculus in Dublith may have died by some form of torture before someone tried to bring her back to life."

I looked over to Edward. "Human transmutation...?"

He shook his head silently, and Al replied to me.

"No, it's not actually a way to create Homunculi. It's just something I read about; I was hoping it might spark some ideas!"

But Ed was considering it, hand resting against his forehead, elbow propped on the armrest. Complete concentration written all over his features.

"It..." His eyes shifted around, studying the floor near my feet. "It might lead to something, Al. I wouldn't rule it out... There had to be some kind of base for Father's Homunculi, right? Some kind of template, maybe?" His head bowed, both hands coming to the space between his brows, separating away from each other like another headache was coming on. "But maybe not, given the power he had…" He shook his head, slowly. "You got any more of those speculations, Al?"

"Uh, no," Al replied, his eyes shrinking for a moment before he looked down to his lap. His hand curled into a fist, bunching up his loincloth. "Sorry. Those are all the ones I read..."

"You found these in a book?" I asked, raising a brow. "How...? Even writing about human transmutation is completely illegal..."

That seemed to pick Ed's mood back up again; he laughed quietly—snickered, really—and left Al to fend for an answer.

"Um, well, May gave them to me! The friend from Xing we told you about. I think she picked them up from Drachma, or Creta—I can't remember which one!"

A suggestive grin came to Ed as he elbowed his brother. "Just a friend, huh?"

Al became flustered, frantically putting his hands in his lap. "I-I don't know what you're talking about!"

"Yeah. I'm sure all those letters you write to each other say differently."

Al just gave a tiny, mortified moan as he looked further away. I met Ed's wide grin with a smile of my own.

"That's so cute, Al!" I said. I grinned a little more, watching as Al became even more panicked.

"Uh, um, so _ANYWAY._ " Those eyes made of light curved, a small laugh escaping him. "Back to the topic at hand. Homunculi."

Ed sighed, and just the sound of his breath deflating like that brought the mood down again. I looked over to him, watching his hand come back to support the side of his head. Knuckles propped against his temple, the side of his cheekbone.

"So I know we only got one relatively solid lead," he began softly, "but at this point, I'm willing to consider every possibility we can think of." He uncurled the fingers resting against his face, knuckles slowly rolling against his cheekbone until two fingertips pressed against his temple. His eyes closed, brows scowling a little. "Even that ludicrous Gate teleportation idea..."

I searched his expression, trying to find an answer for the question I wanted to ask. There was none, forcing me to speak.

"What do you mean?" I asked him finally, quietly. Those golden eyes slowly opened, and after a moment or two, the tiredness inside them fled. He picked himself up, hand falling to curl against the end of the armrest.

"That muscle Homunculus," Edward said. "Every other Homunculus I've seen had black hair; hers was blonde. So either she got some pretty nice hair dye just for the hell of it, or something about the process of Homunculi creation changed."

I understood what he was saying, and turned to Al. "Through human transmutation...?"

Al nodded. "Possibly." He looked to Ed. "But you... Dug up the grave of what we transmuted."

"I know," Ed replied, "and..." His voice suddenly trailed off, whatever thought he was following before leaving him. His eyes went wide. "What if they're mixing methods?" he asked quietly, seeming to be speaking to no one in particular.

Chills descended down my spine, just hearing that. I watched, half of my brain focused, as Ed lowered his gaze from the opposite side of the booth. Focus came in between his brows, and he searched some place near his feet in silence.

"It's kind of a long shot," he began, "but what if they're mixing energy from the gate with human corpses? What if..." He swallowed, and his next words were shaky. Uncertain. Nearly spoken like he was going to be sick. "What if that's the thing we were missing, Al?"

I stared at Ed, feeling a horrible, sour nausea creep up my throat, flanking the back of my mouth. My sight turned to Al as the younger brother spoke, voice shaking slightly.

"What're you saying, Brother?"

"What if..." Ed swallowed, pulling in a deep breath through his nose. His hand curled into a fist, bunching up the denim of his pants. I still saw the brief shakes his fist made; the quivers that stabilized a moment before he continued on. "What if we just needed some of that energy?"

A grin shook onto his face, and his hand rose to his hair, gripping the front of it and causing tendrils to poke out between his gloved fingers. "What if we just needed... Hohenheim there"—I saw his eyes squint a little, a glossiness reflecting off the gold—"Or we just needed Father, somehow..." Those eyes shut, head turning away slightly, hand holding his hair a little firmer. His shoulders bounced with silent laughs. "What if that's all we needed...?"

"You..." I searched for the right words, trying to throw my line of focus out enough and reel in the right memory. I retrieved it, gaze shooting back up and my upper body leaning a bit more towards him. "You told me they weren't human, right?"

"They're not..." Ed responded, voice barely a murmur. Words barely moving his lips.

I nodded, trying to give a good enough smile. "That's right! They're not. They're missing something, right? Something that makes them human."

Ed took in a deep breath, looking away from me. Blinking a few times, searching the floor and the empty seat beside me.

"Ethics, morals, abstract thought, generative computation, emotions, linguistics..." The list rattled on, barely above a whisper. I eventually understood what he was categorizing. Everything that makes us human.

I felt frozen, for a moment or two. I felt like I was against a wall, backed into a corner. Because I agreed with him; if Homunculi did have those abilities... And he had taken their lives...

I found myself reaching out, taking his hand in mine. Snatching it, really; holding his fingers like he had done for me on the rooftop. His voice stopped, one word cut in half as he looked down at our hands.

I felt completely out of my own body. I didn't recognize the voice that came through my lips; I didn't feel the vibrations that were made as the right sounds hummed from my throat; I heard what was said, though. And I'm glad some small part of my brain was actually working for once.

"Just because there's similarities doesn't mean we're the same as they are," I said. "You said it yourself; there's something different. There's something else missing."

I briefly felt the texture of his glove, the warmth of his skin underneath as my thumb ran across the backs of his fingers. My mind came back to me, slowly crawling into focus, as Ed nodded briefly. He blinked, and slowly began settling back into his seat. His hand slipping away from mine.

"We have to," he said quietly. "We have to..."

I knew what he was talking about. I swallowed down the lump in my throat, looking down at my crossed legs, the gentle folds my skirt made over them. I just... I just wasn't sure. Wasn't sure if being here, being with them, was the right thing. I would need to fight back, eventually. But could I take a life—human or not? Could I even consider it a life?

I had already attempted to kill; I drove a concrete-spike into that female Homunculus' eye. I did it without hesitating, holding down screams of agony as I tried to get enough weight onto my wretchedly disabled leg. I tried to kill her without a second thought, because Ed had been in trouble.

Was I any better than those... Soul-less monsters?

There was a disgusting thought rising up, creeping into my consciousness. Something that wondered what that made Ed, since he had killed so many now. I shoved the thought away with as much viciousness as I had, refusing to consider any part of it. I looked up, the sounds of the train coming back to me. The buzz of passengers chatting, and the quiet rhythm of Ed's voice. I focused completely, seeing his elbow on the armrest, open hand supporting his jaw as he kept speaking. I followed his stare to the aisle, surprised to see a food cart there. The employee listened intently, and I watched her nod a few times as he kept ordering.

"...And some Oolong tea, if it's not too much trouble."

He... He was ordering my favorite type of tea. This is what made my brain fully snap back, and I turned to my bag, sitting on the seat beside me.

"I can cover it," I said, opening my bag to retrieve my wide wallet.

I didn't even have it halfway out before Ed's hand came to my wrist. Gently stopping my movements. I looked up, seeing him leaning forward and grinning wide. His other hand extended out to the employee, wrist flicking and fanning out more than enough money.

I pretended to make a sour face, stuffing down the disappointment and reminding myself he was glad to pay for the things we ate, places we stayed. I wanted to keep that smile on his face. Whatever the cost.

Ed drew back, relaxing into his own seat with that beaming grin still there. I smiled back at him, and when I noticed the employee finish pouring my tea, I instantly brought my focus to the left armrest of my seat; a small table that flipped up and folded out. I quickly shifted the table until it was above my lap, something that was almost second-nature by now, and tried to take the tea the hostess was offering.

She just shook her head, placing on the table for me. "Wouldn't want you to burn yourself."

I tried to smile back, falsely curving my eyes as well.

She reached back into the cart, returning to us with both hands holding containers of food. "Two lunch specials?"

"Yeah, that's for me." Ed reached across his brother, taking one container while briefly hooking a thumb in my direction. "The other's for her."

The circular container was placed on my table, right next to the tea. Another one of my favorites. I stared down at it, trying to relax my stomach, trying to untangle it because I _knew_ I had to eat this for him. He couldn't worry like this...

I looked up, hearing the employee announce everything Ed had ordered as she handed it to him.

"One chicken club."

"Yep! Thanks!"

"And two sundaes."

"Here you go!" She tried to hand it to me, and I instantly raised a hand, falsely grinning her way.

"That's for me again," Ed grinned at me. "Unless you're interested."

My hand waved on its own, and soon enough the topic was dismissed. Ed nodded, completely accepting the happiness I gave him, and the employee dug back in her cart, withdrawing a carton.

"Oh! And another lunch special!" Her hand came to her mouth, a blush on her face. "I'm so sorry I didn't give this to you before!"

Ed grinned, reaching across from Al and taking the container of food. The younger Elric looked to me, smiling quietly. An expression I couldn't return.

"Don't worry about it!" the elder Alchemist laughed. "Thanks again!"

Just hearing his voice, I couldn't help but smile; it was a small one, but I instantly saw Al return it. Ed drew back into his seat, immediately popping open the lid of the meal he was holding and breaking apart the chopsticks with his other hand. He glanced to me, noodles positioned a few inches away from his open mouth. The smallest of scowls came to his face.

"Eat your food," he told me.

I noticed the steam rising from the bite he hadn't taken yet, and tried to grin, seeing my way out. "It's still a little hot, isn't it?"

He scowled just a bit, never breaking eye contact as he took the first bite. And his stare popped wide, watering a little. A fist came to his mouth, chopsticks poking out between two clenched fingers.

"No..." he whined softly. "It's a perfectly normal temperature..."

I couldn't laugh like he wanted me to; I couldn't even give that great of a grin. I was happy Al filled the silence for me, placing a smile back on both of their faces.

I got to thinking, while waiting for my tea to cool. Maybe it was the heat curling around my face, or the fact I was holding the mug with one hand and hovering my other around the cup's curve; maybe it was the warmth I was experiencing that made me think of the cold, empty suit sitting across from me.

My thoughts went to Al, how guilty I felt whenever I ate something in front of him. I wished I could somehow change that; make it so he could experience food again. I couldn't imagine not being able to eat for as long as he has...

I thought back, my mind shooting to memories. The pain of forcing myself to eat, that sick weight in my stomach trying to reject food I didn't deserve to have. But I'd always stayed nourished enough, for better or worse.

I felt my lips shake, trying to fight back a wave of tears. I leaned into my tea a little more, eyes shutting. Trying to make it so the steam caught my focus enough to stop me from looking like more of an idiot than usual. About to cry with a mug of _tea_ in my hands. I had nothing to cry about; nothing that deserved any real pain. I shouldn't even be getting _this_ close to tears.

Memories tried to drag me back, this time to somewhere a little closer than before. On a rooftop, on my knees and completely broken against Ed's embrace.

I didn't realize my hands were shaking until Al called my name. I stabilized them as best I could, stare quickly shooting up to meet his. Those lights glanced to my tea, and then he said the question I was dreading.

"Are you okay?"

I nodded as fast as possible, raising the cup to my lips and taking a sip. Instantly feeling my tongue want to shrivel up from the sheer amount of heat. I swallowed it down, feeling the path down my throat instantly become a little raw, a little scalded.

More memories.

"I'm fine, Al," I said, some part of my brain still in the present moment. But the words were flat; not very convincing at all.

Al didn't say anything; he probably didn't know what to do. How to deal with me. My eyes went to Ed, seeing his stare near the floor again. Brows furrowed a little, some mix between thoughtfulness and concern. Both something I didn't deserve.

"I'm fine," I repeated a little louder, focusing back on my tea. Noticing his stare relax a little as he focused back on me. I raised the cup to my lips again, barely moving my mug anywhere before Ed placed two chopsticks in his mouth and quickly clapped.

A light burst of wind blew, a small breeze that instantly squinted my eyes and cooled the tea in my hands. Made the temperature perfect, actually.

"That tea's too hot," Edward said quietly, removing the sticks from between his teeth and picking up a few noodles. "You'll burn yourself if you drink it."

That's the point. But I didn't dare voice this thought. I just nodded, giving a weak word of thanks that he didn't reply to. I peeked over at him from the rim of the cup, taking a sip that was pleasantly warm. The slight heat ran over the raw skin of my tongue, but only part of my brain was focused on the ache.

Ed was still focused on his food, seeming to not be paying any more attention to me. Good. Hands busy with pulling noodles into his mouth, his stare going out the window this time. A little further away from me.

I had to keep it that way...

* * *

 **A/N:** I know I have an Author's Note like every chapter—I hope you guys don't mind! There's just so many details that I should probably clear up; things that change from the canon divergence.

In the last chapter, when Al comments on Ed's height ("But you've been getting taller, Brother!") he's really just commenting on how after the defeat of Father, Ed grew a little bit, from 4'11 to 5'3"-5'4" in the space of almost a year. He only notices the most recent height increase in this chapter :) Our MC's around 5'5", so Ed's about 5'6.5"-5'7". And yes, he's very happy about that!

Also, because Ed and Al never tell the military about the Stone, Amestrian economy booms. Currency is "upgraded" (from cen coins to bills and coins), train services get massively revamped (faster and more frequent rides, comfy seats, armrests with flipout tables between them, overhead conductor speakers, and of course, food carts :) ). My reasoning for this is because those in the military never have to worry about the stone (and because everything seems to be safe with the new furher) they can focus on other things, like train services and general economy. _Also_ , given Ling's position as emperor, Amestris and Xing are on good terms, resulting in more of the Xingese (or "Chinese") culture bleeding into Amestris' (to note an example, in chapter five our MC goes through a beaded entrance way).

Writing this fic is just too fun sometimes!

Anywho, thanks for reading! Super psyched to hear your thoughts on the chapter c:

Fanpage here: facebook speakwhenitrains. Like the story? Like the page for updates on chapters and other projects!


	15. Shadows Against Moonlight

Those first few nights were the hardest. I spent them alone, confined to a room by myself for the first time since I had left... I couldn't even refer to that place as a home.

Ed had been hesitant to let me sleep by myself, without him or Al there. Worried I might break like I did on the rooftop, probably. I smiled at his question from across the hotel hallway, seeing how his worried stare searched my face from where he stood at his doorway. I couldn't help but notice how one gloved hand remained by the door's frame. Almost like he was ready to push off and stride into my room if need be. I tried to ignore the feeling this gave my stomach.

"I'll be okay," I said. "You don't have to worry about me all the time."

Ed became a little surprised at this statement, and then he looked away, a small blush coming to him. One hand rose behind his hair.

"I'm not... Worried _all_ the time..."

I forced myself to make a joke. I couldn't leave us both feeling so... Concerned for me.

"There's a few minutes each day where you're not worried?" I asked, leaning against the door to my room.

He looked to me again, and a small grin hooked his mouth. He copied my action, one hand finding the pocket of his coat.

"Yeah," he replied. "I take a few minutes each day right after lunch to _not_ be worried about you."

I giggled behind my hand, hearing him laugh lightly as well in that strong way of his. I wished I could laugh like that, too. Completely free.

"One of these days I'm going to get you to _actually_ laugh..."

I opened my eyes, seeing his back against the doorframe, head tilted up and eyes staring at the ceiling above us absently. His words repeated in my head, and a deep blush rose to my cheeks. I almost wanted to challenge him on that, but I couldn't just _bet_ on my own walls. I couldn't let any of them break again, especially not that one.

I searched the floor for a reply, and soon I found one. I forced myself to ask a question; the first one I thought of.

"You don't like the way I laugh?"

Interest and shock perked into Ed's face. He quickly raised a hand, trying to dismiss his comment. "Er, n-no!" Realization dawned on him, and quickly he tried to laugh it off, putting one hand to his forehead, the other still held out to me in protest. "Wait, that's not what I meant. Um, I do! I like your laugh, I mean. It's just..." His eyes avoided mine, slight blush still on his face.

"It's just what?" I asked, leaning forward a bit.

"It's just, y'know"—he gave me a sheepish grin—"It's just not a real one."

I frowned and shot him a look of fake irritation. He just grinned, relaxing back against the wall.

"Remember what I said," he told me.

I pretended to roll my eyes. I guess my current wall was sarcasm. "Yeah," I sighed, opening and closing my hand in a talking motion. "You're going to make me laugh _normally_. Big words, Fullmetal."

Ed grinned, pushing himself off the doorframe as his hands found the pockets of his coat. "Don't start acting like Mustang on me. One of him is annoying enough."

I grinned, curled hand rising just quick enough to completely stifle a laugh. Ed tried to hold down a grin of his own, grounding his heel against the carpet.

"Ah, so close!" he exclaimed.

"Let's keep count," I said; another thing to distract myself with. "So far it's two to zero."

"Starting with the odds against me," Ed looked down, hand on his chin and finger tapping along the side of his face. His hand suddenly stopped moving, those eyes becoming just as mischievous as the grin he wore. "I like it!"

I smiled, trying to hold down the feeling I got when my stomach flipped at the look in his eyes. He didn't seem to notice the heat brightening my face, either; his solemn stare was on the plaque near my head. One that told him which room I was staying in.

When the silence kept going, my throat began closing, an anxiety tightening my airways. I guess yet another wall was building... One that kept me from speaking during awkward moments. How many was I at now?

"You sure you'll be okay?" Ed asked. He didn't say my name, and I was relieved enough to smile. I looked to him again, nodding.

"Yeah, I'll be okay."

"Alright," He held my stare for another moment, giving me that soft smile, and stretched out the space between his shoulder blades; raising onto his toes as he drew his shoulders back. "Get some sleep, then."

He spoke the words so kindly; like he truly cared whether or not I slept well. I held down another blush, hardening my emotions until they were like concrete in my chest.

"Of course," I replied, giving the best smile possible. "You too. Tell Al I said goodnight."

Ed nodded. A moment later, I saw Al's hand waving, peeking out from the space between the open door and the frame. Stretching from his place on the couch.

"I wasn't listening in," he said quickly, "I just heard my name!" He called out a goodnight to me, and I stuffed down a laugh, my grin widening.

"Good night, Al," I nearly sang it, taken by how much of a kid he still was. My hand scrunched in and out; a wave he couldn't see.

Ed turned back to me. He smiled again, saying one last goodnight and how we'd see each other in the morning. I could only bring myself to nod at this, watching as he stepped back and closed the door behind him. Those eyes curving in yet another smile, another display of friendship I didn't deserve.

This was the thought that led me to experiment with my own crippling weaknesses. Like a river crashing against a dam; see how much pressure those walls could take, and then rebuild accordingly.

During these nights alone, I tried to face myself. I tried to get enough courage to do the things I hadn't been able to do for years. Like look into the mirror or try and say the sound of my own name. It never worked, though. My legs would always give out halfway to the bathroom; my tongue would always shut down before I could even speak the first syllable. More than anything, I spent most of those nights sobbing into my sheets, face against the mattress. Torturing myself with the memory of being in Ed's embrace, feeling that warmth and the loyalty I didn't deserve.

When I found that my eyes could give no more tears, when I found my chest was empty and shaking, in those moments is where sleep found me. Dreamless periods where I didn't have to think. Didn't have to distract myself from anything. Then morning would come, and my eyes would open as slowly as they had closed. I'd pick myself up off the mattress, feeling parts of it crinkle from how my waves of tears had dried. I'd lift myself back up, and I'd lift the walls up again as well.

This cycle continued for about three days, until one night there was only one room available.

Ed had hesitated when the innkeeper told him this. I listened to how he replied, how quiet his voice was. A concern, I think.

"Could you check again?"

I knew why he was asking. He didn't want to be in the same room as me. I felt myself nearly break, but I quickly forced the wall from cracking. Putting a bandage over the fractures. They could break another time. Just not tonight. Not in front of them again.

The innkeeper finished looking over the list, the small stack of paper falling back against the clipboard.

"No," she replied, slowly shaking her head, "I'm sorry, sir. There's only one room available tonight. We're full to the brim, I'm afraid."

"And all the other hotels in this town are, too..." Ed finished, looking down to the floor.

He turned, meeting my eyes from over his shoulder. There was a quiet question in that gaze, and I nodded.

"It's okay." I tried to smile, and forced myself to make the expression as bright as I could.

"You sure?" he asked, and the only thing I _wasn't_ sure about was why he was acting like this.

I nodded. "It's fine! Why wouldn't it be?"

He frowned a little at this, still trying to figure me out, I suppose. But then he gave a one-shouldered shrug, turning back to the receptionist.

The trek to our room was the last adventure of the day. I smiled a little, confined to the silence around us instead of the empty space between my ears. Emptiness. It was something quickly becoming a home.

Ed's murmured voice reached my ears, but the words slipped away from me. The stairs ended, and he yawned wide, head tilting back, arms stretching wide. I pressed against my knee, hiking up the last stair, and waited for something. Some turn of the head, some quiet, silent indication that he had been speaking to me, before.

Nothing came, and I could breathe until we got into the room.

The air between my lungs and throat caught. Kitchen, couch, one room.

Would I be stuck in a living area with Alphonse? Silently forced to break down on the tiniest, miniscule ways? Silent clips of sobs and microscopic fractures against imaginary walls?

I didn't know, but my mind came back to me as Ed flopped onto the couch face-first.

"Take the room," he said. His voice was muffled, and if I were in any other state, I would have laughed.

I feigned innocence, stepping a little to the side, keeping my hands behind my back.

"Are you sure?" I asked

He nodded a few times, squeaking the leather and sending smiles to Al's and my faces. "Sure, sure," the elder Eric continued. "Couches and walls are a luxury."

 _Trust me_. The extra words he wasn't saying rang out in my head, sending a brighter smile to my face. I could keep this up, for a few more minutes.

My posture dipped down, and the next words to exit my head were ones I chirped out.

"Well, have a good rest then. Read well, Al!"

Alphonse, already settled against the wall with a book in one hand and the suitcase closed beside him, nodded, sending a smile my way. I returned it, keeping my eyes curved so I wouldn't have to see how those lights reverted back to circles, how they dipped low to read a book too small for such big hands. Words that probably wouldn't lead us— _them_ anywhere when it came to restoring their bodies.

Good. I was correcting myself. I was slowly breaking pieces down, with them here.

Ed was already snoring lightly when my feet pattered across the living area. Softly, quietly; I didn't want to wake him, even if he was a heavy sleeper...

As I poured hot tea into a mug, I started thinking. Wondering how I would survive the night, with them here. With a room to my own, I could be louder than usual, but in such a confined space... I couldn't make a peep, without Alphonse hearing.

After a quick bow to the younger Elric and another bid goodnight, I ducked inside my room and shut the door. I stared down at where I figured my tea was, unable to see very much in the darkness. I felt it creep out to me, those shadows. I let them envelop me, curl around my shoulders, my waist. Caressing, embracing. Building up those walls, letting the heaviness sag until it reattached to my lungs each more. Weighing down each breath, each pull of oxygen that still kept me alive. Kept a wicked heart beating.

No... Not wicked. Not yet, anyway.

Time stretched on, and eventually the steam from my mug faded, the liquid between my palms cooling. I stood in the darkness for another minute or two, not doing much in particular except thinking.

I... I felt so conflicted that I found myself pacing in the darkness of the sole bedroom. I tried to think, torn between sobbing myself to sleep and trying to be as quiet as possible as I did so, or to go out and spend the night completely awake. But I knew I couldn't do that. I had to get some sleep; I couldn't go on empty tomorrow, not knowing what kind of gruesome human-like creature was waiting for us.

I stopped walking when I heard the sound of running water. The light that had been on and shining through the bottom of my door was off; it had been for a few hours now...

The tap quietly shut off, and I found myself thinking again. Al didn't need to use water in the slightest, so that only meant Ed was still awake...

I turned, looking to my left and making out the hands of the clock with the small amount of light given. I squinted a little more, not believing where the hands were pointing. Two-thirty in the morning? What was Ed still doing up at this hour?

 _Getting some water, obviously._ I snapped at myself, feeling the familiar darkness hang onto my soul. Dragging my heart back down.

I looked to the door again, as if I could see underneath the wood and through the darkness. I hadn't heard any footsteps, nothing to indicate Ed had retreated back to the couch. A worry settled into me, reaching from somewhere deep down, and this was what made me step forward, hand finding the doorknob.

I opened the door as quietly as I could, spotting Ed's silhouette across the room. Leaning against the kitchen sink, the moonlight from the window nearby reflecting off the metal of his shoulder. I stared for a moment, once again transfixed by the prosthetic, before I noticed how low his head was bowed. How hard one hand, his human one, was gripping the edge of the sink.

I looked around, expecting to see Alphonse sitting somewhere. But the soft soul in the armored suit was nowhere to be seen. I stepped out of my room, the door creaking a little more, the floorboard sounding at the pressure of my light steps.

Ed looked up, and I couldn't see his stare given how the shadows fell across his eyes. I ignored the feeling this gave my gut.

"Where's Al?" I asked.

"Off saving a cat or two," Ed replied, head shifting enough for me to know he had broken his stare. I couldn't tell if he was joking or not. When I didn't say anything back, his head perked up again, the strand of hair he had hooked out raising a little in a soft interest. I heard the grin on his voice, saw the way his mouth pushed up a little bit as he continued.

"I'm just kidding," he told me. "He's in the lobby, reading. Didn't want to bug me with the light." One shoulder shrugged. "Told him I was fine with it, but y'know..."

I nodded, understanding. I noticed his shirt, then, when his shoulder shrugged. Usually, it was thick enough to hide the start of his automail but reveal a small amount of the scar on his shoulder and chest. Right now, the strap had slid a bit more out, resting a little on his shoulder's edge and revealing the scar—along with his automail—more so than usual. I had never seen either exposed like this.

He caught me staring, quickly following my gaze. Surprise perked into his expression, and he grinned before quickly fixing the shirt. Covering the scar again.

"Sorry," he laughed. "It's probably pretty weird to look at, huh?"

I shook my head, and I was speaking the truth when I replied.

"I don't mind," I told him. "I think..." A smile came to me, and I couldn't remember the last time I had given one this free and genuine. "I think it's fascinating."

I didn't hear a response, and immediately my smile fell. I looked to Edward, seeing his eyes wide and glass half-positioned to take another sip.

"Y-you do?"

I nodded. "Yeah," I said, giving him a look of confusion. "Why wouldn't it be...?"

Ed became a bit more interested in his water, downing about half of it as I realized I had completely messed up again. He was drinking fast to get _away_ from me...

He drew back from his cup, giving a laugh I could only hear as nervous.

"N-nothing!" he replied. "There's nothing wrong with it!" He cleared his throat, one hand rising to the back of his neck. "I... Not many people view it that way, I don't think... At least, not the scar..."

There was a distance to those last words, like his mind was going into some memory. Some place I couldn't follow. I knew automail was popular, of course, and I couldn't really imagine someone discriminating him for something like that. Just the thought made my stomach twist.

I watched as he swirled his glass, looking down at the water as it spun. He held the cup with his metal hand, and the small movements he put into his arm just made the moonlight catch onto the metal. Sending small strips of light across it, flickers that danced my way.

"Does it ever hurt?" I asked him, trying to imitate that softness he had always given me.

Ed looked down at his arm, still holding onto the glass with his metal hand.

"Sometimes," he replied softly. He turned back to his water, taking another sip. "There's times when my scars act up, but usually it's only when the nerves get connected to the automail."

"That sounds painful..."

He looked at the expression on my face, something I hoped showed how concerned I was for him. Heat tinged his cheeks before he looked down to his glass.

"Doesn't hurt too much," he said. "Nothing to really get worried about." He included my name, and I swallowed down my reply. I looked away, not wanting to intrude anymore.

Before I could do more than think of moving back into my bedroom, Ed spoke again, quickly looking up to meet my eyes.

"I didn't wake you up, did I?" he asked, and the concern that rode along his words nearly made the space behind my chest shake.

I quickly shook my head, responding in the same hushed tone. Even if we were the only two here. "No! I... I was already awake. You didn't bother me at all."

"Oh." He looked back to his water, swirling the small amount left. His golden eyes flicked up, the softness holding my attention. "You having trouble sleeping? Anything I could help with?"

I felt my foot move on its own, sliding back as if wanting to take a step. Ed noticed this, his stare dropping down, watching me get ready to move. I tried to recover, stepping back as quickly as I could. Trying to act normal. But it was a little hard, considering the pattern I had set myself into. I would've been breaking myself to pieces right about now, if I had a room to myself.

"No," I replied, responding to his question. I busied myself with fixing my clothes, trying to smooth them out. "I'm alright. Just stay up late thinking sometimes."

Ed nodded, seeming to accept the answer.

"Yeah," he said in small laugh. His eyes dropped back down to his water again. "Sometimes your brain just won't shut up about the stupidest of things."

I fought back the thought that was telling me he was actually talking about _my_ brain. I mentally shook off the idea, and I searched him for a moment. That ache was back; a small, dull pain in my chest that I felt whenever he or Al said something that worried me...

"Anything I can help with?" I asked softly.

He raised the glass to his lips, meeting my eyes from above the rim of the cup. He smiled a little in that stare, enough to curve the bottom of his eyes.

He took a sip and lowered the glass back down, and even with the soft amount of moonlight, I caught the small blush running across his cheeks.

"No," he replied, and for some reason my name wasn't so painful when he said it. "It's okay."

I waited. I was hoping he would say more; give me something I could do to help. But when he said nothing, I realized I had overstayed the welcome I had created for myself. My foot slid back, pivoting enough to turn me halfway around.

"Well..." I began, "Sleep tight, Ed, if you can."

I forced myself to move, padding away on quiet feet and hearing Ed's voice follow me. He said one word, and it was enough to crack some part of an outer wall.

"Yeah..."

There was something in the way he spoke it that was all too familiar. A heaviness, an absolute sorrow that forced me to stop walking away. I turned, looking over my shoulder.

I didn't know why I stayed. I knew I couldn't help him. But I said one word back to him, voice just as quiet.

"Promise?"

He looked back to me, and even with the dim light I could see the light blush running along his face. I could see the soft smile as well."Yeah," he said, that smile only growing. "I'll promise to try and get some sleep if you do."

Try. Try to get some sleep. I could do that. I guess I technically was—or at least I had been during the past few nights.

I tried to fight back the heat rising to my face, noticing he was still smiling as I nodded and promised him that I would. I made my way towards the bedroom again.

"Good night..." he called after me, soft words comforting.

I looked a bit over my shoulder, seeing his golden stare rise from the cup and smile lightly at me again. I fought down the blush as much as I could.

"Good night," I returned.

 _Good morning, technically._ I thought, but I immediately shut the thought away, guilt flashing into me. The sun was still down; it was night time. And to think I wanted to make a joke... I wasn't smart enough to.

As the door shut behind me, I nearly felt myself break again. I pulled air into my lungs, steadying myself.

I was at a two way street right now.

Continue the cycle, or actually try to get some sleep like a _normal_ person.

I looked over at my bed, covers still untouched. I didn't want to cheat Ed out of that agreement. But it wouldn't be the first time I had done something... So horrible. Maybe that would drive him away. I suppose that outcome was inevitable. It would happen eventually.

I was sure of it. But I didn't let myself think on it anymore.

The covers were cold, chilling my skin a little. Goosebumps rose to meet the sheets, and I turned onto my side, bunching the edge of the sheets into a fist and pulling them up to my chin. Part of me wondered where that red blanket was. The one Ed had put on me the night I rejected his offer for ice cream.

Just as that thought came to me... A soft knock came to the door.

Ed's voice, stuttering for a moment before saying my name.

"Y-yeah?" I asked, confused and shocked.

"Uh, sorry," I could hear the light smile in his voice. "Can I come in for a sec'?"

"Yeah, sure..."

"Thanks..." The door opened, and I saw something big draped over his arm. He... He couldn't have...

He lifted the blanket a little bit, gesturing to it as his other hand rose, automail fist clearing his throat.

"Just... Just, uh, thought you might be cold," he said. "The heater's busted, so..."

I sat up, watching him walk towards me with quiet footsteps. "Ed..." I noticed his wide grin as he neared my bed, how that smile only increased as he held out the folded blanket for me. Like a little kid. I glanced to it, then met his smiling eyes again before shaking my head. "You don't have to. Wasn't this the blanket you were using to sleep?"

Ed's expression fell. He glanced to the blanket as well, a little flustered as he shook his head. "N-no. I made another one. Got a ton of them, trust me!"

He held the blanket out a little more, another offer to take it.

"Oh, wait," The gift was pulled just out of my reach before I could grab it. "What am I doing?"

I watched as he flicked the blanket downwards, unfolding it and expanding it wide. Showing me that Flamel insignia decorated in the red faux fur, the symbol rotated on its side given the edges he was holding.

He also seemed to like showing me that design, because I saw that wide grin again. Somewhere in my mind, the sound of small little trumpets played.

I grinned, tilting my head to one side. "You like that symbol, don't you?"

His expression grew a bit softer as he nodded. He swept the opposite end of the blanket away from him, and I watched it fan out above me.

"I do," he replied, the blanket settling on me perfectly. "It's tied to our Teacher, actually."

I looked back to him, incredibly interested now. "How so?"

Ed grinned, a little bashful as he put his hands in his pockets. "There's a few different meanings for it. Her interpretation relates to alchemy: the snake twisting its way around the concept of God, foiling it in a way. How even if we try, alchemists still can't obtain the wings heaven can grant, if it exists." He shrugged, head turning down and eyes closing. "But between you and me, there's another reason I wear it."

"Another meaning?" I asked.

He nodded, a soft smile curving his lips. "This symbol was actually created by the first Philosopher Stone's theorist."

I looked away from the blanket, away from the symbol he had placed upright for me to see.

"Really?"

He nodded, leaning his weight to one side and removing a hand from his pocket. "Yeah," He looked down to the blanket, and I followed his stare again.

He leaned over, metal hand lightly tracing the symbol's lines as he spoke about them.

"This entire staff"—His finger made a huge circle, all around the symbol, but I knew he was talking about the large cross—"This is the path it takes. Starts out straight"—His finger traced upwards, lightly running along my side and sending chills that nearly felt foreign—"And then the snake starts to wind up the cross, distorting the path, the goal being the philosopher's stone."

I remained silent, watching his hand move, gently tapping the crown beneath the center of my chest. "Right here, the goal of so many alchemists. A stone of infinite possibility."

I blushed slightly, given his proximity, and listened to him continue on. Finger tracing the wings, curving along the small little hill-like lines.

"Wings are an allusion to God and represent the quest for the impossible; they make it seem like there's hope because of the idea behind angels, but really they're just lifting that crown, that goal further away."

He straightened, hand drawing away from me as he continued.

"Nicolas Flamel was his name, the first theorist. I guess you can say he's the guy who set Al and I on this road." He grinned at me, and I felt that pain rise in my chest again. "I remember one of the books I had read had this symbol." He reached over again, tapping the center of it, and I fought back the feeling of butterflies in my stomach. "Always thought it looked pretty cool. But I guess I never realized how deep the meaning could be, with us..."

I looked back down to the symbol, realizing he was right. But there was also something else on my mind.

He was missing one explanation; the only one I truly knew for certain. I didn't open my mouth to say anything, didn't give him any indication I knew anything. I just dropped my stare back to the blanket, staring at the point closest to me. The middle spike of the crown.

"You're thinking of the third meaning, aren't you?"

I looked up, seeing him give me that same smile again. He kicked his weight to one side, hands still in his pockets as his eyes slowly closed. Smile still remaining as I stayed silent, listening to him continue on.

"Medicine and enlightenment are king," he stated, and I knew the words. I knew the citation even before he said it. "Alchemic Symbols by Marcus Drif, page 87, paragraph three." He grinned a little more, and for a moment, I almost imagined his teeth to be a bit sharper. "Line 27." One eye opened, smiling at me, even if the bottom wasn't curving. I could feel the warmth in that color, even if I didn't give myself that incredible gift for long. I forced myself not to look away, building that wall again. I had to work on repairing, re-establishing at night still. I could multi-task. I had just enough brain power to two things at once. Break a little, build more. 20-80 exchange. These thoughts all came to me with such speed I nearly felt sick. I looked up as Ed continued on.

"You knew that reference, didn't you?" he asked, and the softness of his voice hit somewhere deep inside me; inside those walls I kept building. Almost bringing me back to that rooftop, feeling his thumb run across my hand. Seeing that smile on his face, giving energy towards something he shouldn't have been focused on.

He continued on, without pause. Never missing a beat, still staring at me with one eye open, still giving that same warmth. "You wanna tell me the publishing date?"

I couldn't help but smile, taking the opportunity to look away, back down to my lap as my lips curved into a good enough arch. Minimal. I could do minimal.

"1898. Atomic Publishing, if you want that, too."

I looked up, peeking just enough for his grin to fall in my line of vision. He laughed just a little, the sound quiet, even if we were the only two people here.  
Maybe he realized this, maybe he realized the time, realized it was night and not morning. Maybe he just wanted to get away from me, realized he had done the chore he needed to do. But whatever the reason torturing him, he slid a foot back, upper-body bowing a bit forward, eyes staring straight at mine before sweeping down to the blanket. He spoke as he did this, words still quiet. I tried to focus on what he said, not how he said it. I didn't want to break; I felt like I would; I was cracking in the smallest of ways. Small microfractures against the newest walls.

Any response I could have said was suddenly forgotten as he slid one foot back, hand rising to the back of his hair.

"So, um, anyway just wanted to give that to you!" He grinned, blushing again.

I avoided his stare, trying to avoid the heat rising as well. I thanked him again, and he just nodded.

"Yeah," he said. "No problem."

I watched him pad out of the room, stopping to close the door behind himself and send me another quiet goodnight. Another light smile. A soft one.

"Good night," I returned, and motioned to him with the blanket. "And thank you, again."

Ed just glanced to the thick covet, heat tinging his cheeks before he nodded once. That smile just increased a little more before he ducked his head, hand coming to his hair again. Momentarily hiding part of his face from me.

"Y-yeah. Like I said, no problem."

He laughed, nervous again. "It's really just a blanket; I make 'em all the time!"

My smile fell, one curve dropping and then the other joining it in a straight line. He was right; it was just a simple blanket. I shouldn't have been so... Annoying with him doing something so simple. It's not like I really deserved to have that kindness anyway.

A familiar weight settled into my chest, and for a moment I had forgotten that it was even there. It had never left; only increased a little more, making me realize its presence. Like another limb in my body; another lung in between and above the first two. Always there. Always reminding me who and what I was.  
I looked up as Ed began closing my bedroom door, the action creaking the door slightly. He looked up from the knob he held, meeting my gaze and shooting me a bright grin. One that really only made me feel even worse.

"I'll see you in the morning then, okay?" he said. "Get some sleep."

"Okay," I smiled, some distant, unknown part of me picking my lips up and curving them to the right places. A normal smile. "You too."

He nodded, and I knew from the small change in his gaze that he remembered our promise. His expression shifted in the smallest of ways, becoming just a bit more focused, a bit more determined.

"Yeah," he replied quietly as the door was almost shut. "Night."

I just grinned, knowing if I said anything back, we would be going in an endless cycle of "good night"s and "get some sleep"s. I let the door close, and when I heard his steps pad away from me, I allowed myself to breathe again. Closing my eyes, settling back against the mattress and feeling on that weight sink against the space behind my chest, the darkness spreading into my lungs. An old friend; a melancholy lullaby.

I shifted, rolling onto one side. I moved my hand, curling the edge of the blanket around my fist and holding it near my mouth. Focusing completely on the warmth and the loyalty I just didn't deserve.

* * *

 _ **A/N: After about a year-and-a-half of sporadic writing, this chapter is FINALLY done. I hope you guys enjoyed!**_

 _My original Author's Note:_ Ah, this chapter was so fun to write! Just for reference's sake, Ed's analysis of his insignia is something I made up. The name "Nicolas Flamel", however, is not mine. That man is actually believed to have discovered the philosopher's stone in real life, so I attached that meaning to the world of FMA. But you can thank the INCREDIBLE movie "As Above, So Below" for introducing/inspiring me with that. Really cool horror movie centered around alchemy haha.

Music is a huge inspiration for me–I have a main playlist of over 300 songs dedicated to this fic. I'll be recommending songs as we go, but for now I'll give warm shout out to "Skeletons" by Heartist. Check it out on YouTube!


	16. The Games We Play

I walked out of the bedroom dressed and with the large blanket bundled in my arms. Ed was on the couch, and sneakily I peered over the back, seeing him continue to breathe, continue to sleep. But there wasn't a blanket on him. He was sleeping, completely exposed to the cold air.

Shock came to me, and I quickly fanned the blanket out above him, making sure it was covering him completely. The tips of his feet stuck out a little bit, and I struggled with the decision of pulling the blanket down and covering his socked toes or leaving as is and allowing his shoulders a bit more warmth. Ed shifted in his sleep, a tiny groan coming from him as his hand picked up the blanket's nearest end and pulled it closer to his face. Revealing a bit more of his socks and deciding for me. He sniffed, and I wondered if he had a cold coming on.

Guilt bloomed in my stomach as I padded over to the small kitchen, searching for some kind of tea I could make him.  
The door to my left opened, and with a tea bag in between two fingers, I looked over to see Al walk in. He stopped in the doorway, staring at Ed like he was surprised to see him on the couch.  
"We're not behind schedule are we?" I asked in a whisper.

Al noticed me, and quickly shook his head. "N-no! I was just wondering why that blanket was on him!"

I paused, wondering why Al would be wondering such a thing. I turned back to the stove, putting the tea bag in the kettle and flipping the lid closed.

"He has others, doesn't he?" I asked.  
Al smiled. "Is that what he told you?" He laughed a little, shaking his head. "He's never made a blanket in his life except for that one. He made it for you!"

My stare went to Ed again, still perfectly asleep with that giant blanket almost covering him completely. I felt a warmth in my stomach, one that felt like I actually had that blanket on me now...

Ed stirred, a groan floating from his furrowed lips. He sat up, blanket hanging off of one shoulder, and turned to us. Staring with one half-open eye. I guess it must have looked a little strange; Al and I standing by a tea pot, staring at him while his brother smiled and I blushed.

Ed tried to open both eyes, looking down at the blanket covering one side of his body.  
"Wh'dj 'ou put this on me for?" he asked, and I did everything in my power not to grin.  
I failed, trying to hide my smile behind my hand as I leaned over towards Al.  
"Does he always talk like that after waking up?" I whispered.  
Al giggled, obviously just as amused as I was. "Sometimes. Only after a really deep sleep."  
With the blanket held over his shoulder by one hand, Ed stood up, stretching his eyes wide. He shuffled towards us, trying to wipe the sleep from his eyes.  
"I gave this to you," he told me, voice a little less groggy. When he was close enough, the blanket was suddenly thrown at me. Landing directly on my head and over my face.  
Ed continued on, feet padding past Al and I. "So keep it," he yawned.  
I raised a hand, moving the edge of the blanket that was draped over one eye, glaring at him in half-play and half-actual irritation.  
Ed grinned, hands in his pockets as he leaned against the counter opposite of me.

"That's a good look on you," he said. "If we ever need to go undercover, we'll just throw that over your head and you'll be good to go!"

I _almost_ laughed at that, but luckily the tea kettle sounded and interrupted my focus. I grabbed the blanket, sliding it forward and draping it over my arm again.

Ed stepped forward before I could do anything, two cups being held by one finger.

"Here," he took the kettle away from me, ignoring the look of irritation I shot him. "I'll do this while you put _your_ blanket away. How do you like your tea?"

I grinned, padding over to the living room and realizing I kind of had the upper hand. "Make it how you want," I said, turning around to meet his lightly surprised gaze. I gestured to the blanket in my arms, lightly raising it. "I made it for you."

I caught a glimpse of pink in his face before he turned back to the kettle, setting down the two cups on the counter side-by-side.  
"Thanks," he replied quietly.  
I just nodded, feeling a soft blush of my own come to my face.  
He sniffed again, the sound incredibly quiet but enough to make me turn back around.  
"You're not coming down with a cold, are you?" I asked.  
Ed quickly shook his head. "No. I don't really get sick."

I found that a little hard to believe. I glanced down to the tea he was pouring into the mugs, and even though he wasn't looking at me I gestured to the cups with a nod.

"Well, I made that for you"-I couldn't help the small smile on my face-"In case you _were_ getting sick."

I saw that blush come back, deepening in color. With a mug in his hands, he spun around to lean against the counter, raising the steaming cup to his lips. Trying to hide the color of his face, I think.

He took a sip, face clenching at the heat and warping the sound of his reply. " _Thanks_." He paused long enough to swallow and then continued on with a grin. "But I'm practically invincible, remember?"

Oh, I remembered all right. I shifted my weight to one foot, holding the blanket closer to myself.  
"Said the blind guy who transmuted his own sight back."  
Ed pointed a finger at me. "That's right! And don't you forget it!"  
I couldn't fight down the smile as I rolled my eyes, turning around to find some place to put this giant blanket. Al was standing in front of Ed's suitcase, packing up the books he had been reading and organizing a little. I didn't look to see what he had laid out, instead watching as Al held a hand out to me.  
"I can put that in there," he said.  
"Thanks!" I replied cheerily, handing over the folded blanket.  
Al just nodded, helmet clicking at the motion, and set the blanket inside.

"Thank you!" I handed him the blanket, suddenly a bit worried. "But... Will it fit?"  
Al just smiled at me, pushing the lid down with both hands and clicking a lock with one. "Don't worry about it," he said with a laugh. "We've worked miracles with getting things in here. Blankets are the least troublesome."  
Ed scoffed lightly, and suddenly he was close behind, holding out my mug of tea. I reached out, taking the cup with both hands and watching his fingers unwrap from the handle, becoming inches away from mine. I mimicked the/his hold on the mug, listening to his reply—words spoken after light laughter.  
"Yeah, like that time we tried to fit two days' worth of food? Didn't work out so well."  
"When was that?" I asked, turning around as Al took the suitcase and stood upright.  
Continuing to walk away from me, Ed glanced back, meeting my eyes for a moment before shrugging.  
"After the whole thing with Father. Little less than eight months ago, actually. We were up in Briggs again, searching for this Amulet."  
And they didn't find anything. I felt my heart sink into my stomach, the larger organ rejecting the tea in my hands. I forced myself to take a sip.  
The herb-flavored water pooled in my tongue, allowing flavors to gently bloom and surround my tastebuds. I smiled, enough to genuine curve my eyes. He had added a little sugar to it. The perfect amount...

Hearing Ed's voice again, I turned around. With the tea still in one hand, he stepped into his boots, gently twisting each foot until it slipped inside.

"Start thinking about what you want for breakfast," he told me. "I'm paying."

As long as it wasn't champagne, I'd be fine. But I also wasn't about to let him pay.

"Mm." I raised the cup to my lips, feeling the steam curl against my face as I replied. "Think I'll sit extra close to the aisle this time. Make sure I get my money there first."

He grinned, and I grinned right back at him. He thought I was joking, too.  
"Yeah," Ed scoffed, his grin still there as he shrugged his coat onto one shoulder. The cup was transferred to his other hand, allowing the other arm to slip through and the coat's front to be adjusted. "Just make sure you don't get distracted when the cart rolls up."  
I wasn't sure if that was a threat or not, but I gave him my slyest look anyway, staring over the rim of the mug.  
"Make sure you don't get distracted either."  
He just grinned a little more, and I caught sight of his cheeks tinting pink before I looked away. Heat rose to my face as well, and it wasn't from how close my tea was.

* * *

Traveling with them soon became comfortable, almost. Everything seemed to set into a rhythm; a type of lull that was nearly like spiritual lullaby.

I gently shook my head, not wanting to be dragged into a past life. I turned away from the window, looking up at Alphonse, who held the package of cards in hands that seems too big for someone so caring.

"You really don't know how to play?" he asked, continuing our conversation.

I tried to grin, feeling the smile almost twist downwards into a frown. "It's... Been a long time..."  
Suddenly, Alphonse was waving a hand; the one that wasn't holding the card deck. "N-n-n-n-no! I didn't mean for that to come off as rude! I'm just surprised, that's all! You seem like the type of person who knows a lot about card games."  
My interested perked a little. What did he mean by that?  
But he was busy slipping the cards out of the holder and into his waiting palm, voice echoing out to me.  
"Gin's one of my favorites. I think you'll like it a lot!"

I did my best to smile in return, and then I noticed one of Ed's eyes had cracked open. The gold steadily watching me through slitted vision. I looked over at him, and instantly his eye closed again. Shutting that gold away.

I turned back to Al, picking my lips up into a good enough smile as he shuffled the cards again, explaining the rules as he did so. Words that vaguely sparked memories into my mind. I blocked them out, pretending like I didn't have a clue what he was saying as I nodded along to his instructions.  
I noticed another smile hook onto Edward's face. I glanced at Al. It seemed like there was something going on between them.  
"Is it... Is it a hard game?" I asked.  
Al's eyes shrunk, hands raising in defense despite how they were each holding something. "No-no-no! It's not hard at all! You'll get it really quick, I promise!"

"Okay." I nodded, the relief in my voice.

Al started a game on the tables we had pulled out, dealing us each a row and beginning our first round of Gin. The game wasn't hard, just like Al promised. Soon, I was easily winning.

"Gin!" I exclaimed, putting down my hand.  
Alphonse paused, looking down at my cards. "Again?!"  
At my large grin, a gleam came to his eyes. "Alright! I'm not going easy on you this time!"  
My smile dropped, and I felt something of guilt at the fact that he had to go easy. But after registering what he just declared, a competitive flame sparked inside me, something I hadn't felt since I was little.  
"Let's go!" I swiped up the cards. "New game, I'll deal."  
I noticed a small smile on Edward's face and gently knocked his boot with the back of my hand.  
"You're supposed to be sleeping." I told him.  
He just let out a tiny groan, smile dropping into a frown as he turned towards the window more. I wondered if maybe Al and I were being too loud, but figured he probably wouldn't be smiling like that if we were bugging him.  
I focused on shuffling, looking down at the cards as they shifted around parts of the deck in thin sections. Memories came back to me, the voice of my grandmother's instruction guiding my hands.  
 _"Make sure you keep all cards with you, dear. Yes, just like that. Oh, so good, my fair one!"_  
My hands suddenly slipped from turning the cards around. Half of the deck spilled onto the table, turning an Ace of Spades and a Queen of Hearts over. I stared at the space between them, covered by the backs of one of the cards. I had forgotten about that nickname... She used to call me that because of the Snow White story.  
 _"Mirror mirror on the wall..."_  
My name sounded a bit like...  
Alphonse called to me. I looked up, hearing his voice echo as he continued.  
"Are you okay?"  
I saw Ed's eyes open again and I felt awful for interrupting his sleep. I nodded, regaining my composure.  
"Of course!" I said, sweeping up the cards I had spilled. I resumed shuffling and started passing the right amount of cards between us. "Just getting too into this game, that's all! I'm definitely going to beat you again!"  
Al giggled a little, happiness curving the lights of his eyes.  
More than a few card games later, and even after Al teaching me another game, the food cart began to roll by.  
Ed rose from his slumped position, arms stretching out as he yawned with a grin.  
"Ahh, what a convenient time for me to wake up!"  
"You probably weren't even asleep!" I retorted. He only sent me a slyer grin in reply before drawing his feet off of the seat next to me and onto the floor. The employee waiting for us didn't comment, seemingly not wanting to cause a fuss.  
Ed leaned over, and I saw him squint at what was displayed. His narrowed eyes swept up to the employee.  
"You got any alcohol?"  
"Edward," I glared. "It's barely two in the afternoon."  
Ed just grinned at me again, seeming to be more than happy with prodding me like this. He leaned back, crossing his legs and waving a gloved hand.  
"Just give us two lunch specials, please."  
The employee nodded, beginning to pull out sandwiches and drinks. I almost asked Al if he wanted anything before I remembered. The question died in my throat, a heavy depression sinking into my heart. How could he do this, keep smiling when he can't even do something as basic as eat? Where did that happiness come from?  
My mind came back to me as Al suddenly held up a hand, dismissing the food being offered to him.  
"Oh, none for me, thanks." he said.  
The waitress moved her arm, sweeping the plate to me. I took it with both hands and a quiet thank you, staring down at the sandwich. A toothpick was inside it, a green olive staring back at me with its red eye.

"Thanks." Ed was leaning over, handing an excessive amount of money to Al, who handed it to the employee.

"Oh, thank _you!_ " The woman gushed. "Let me know if you'd like _anything_ else!"

"Yeah."  
Ed started wolfing down his sandwich, eating like he always did whenever food was around. I stared at mine still, raising it to my mouth and taking small bites. Al smiled happily, and I could only meet his eyes with my own hollowing ones.

It was a constant process, that hollowing. Constantly digging beneath the surface of myself, constantly making something rotten and whole into a shell.  
But I digress.  
We continued searching, town stops filled with train rides filled with games and light conversation. After hearing a rumor of a new type of stone, we traveled to Youswell, meeting a boy named Kyle and his father. Kyle showed us the stone, but to our disappointment, it was something he had named "emerald" and possessed no power outside of a life-baring green color.  
It reminded me of their eyes. People I no longer spoke to. People that's fists knocked at my door, murmured voices speaking to one another before footsteps lead them away from my hunched posture. Like Ms. Silva had speculated when she noticed me, it was postulated that I had moved away. With him.  
I felt tears breach my eyes, and I focused on the sting. It was dangerous, letting so much of the pain out. Letting it dangle over the edge of my eyelids like this. But it was nighttime, and I could use the pain to my advantage.  
All I had to do was break in order to rebuild.

* * *

 _A/N:_ Shorter chapter than usual, but I hope you enjoyed learning a little bit more about our MC!

 ** _Also,_** I should probably let you guys know I'm now a **published author!** My novel, _Grazing the Sky_ , is available on Amazon (it's the reason I haven't updated LAS in so long lol).


	17. Warmth of the Sun

We landed in Kuijec after a few hours of traveling. I stretched out my legs, walking on my tip-toes to extend the muscles a bit more. Ed noticed, sending a small smile my way. I looked down, blushing at being caught doing something so foolish.

Light chatter floated between us, that is, until we walked past a pet shop.

Al immediately stopped, a distant whine overtaking his suit.

Ed sighed, half-lidded eyes glaring off to the side. "I'm _not_ going in there."

Al whined, hands in front of his mouth. "But Brother..."

"No." Ed walked off, swinging the case. I almost trotted after, but my stare went to Al as he turned to me.

"You can talk some sense into him, can't you?" the hollowed voice asked. "He'll listen to you."

Ed turned, stopping in his tracks and frowning, a huge blush on his face. His eyebrow twitched.

"I... I _would_ not."

I looked back to Al as he replied, fists on his hips.

"You _so_ would." And then he continued on, asking me to ask Ed.

 _I'd rather stay out of it._ I replied silently, taking a small step back.

Ed gave a dramatic sigh, head hanging. "Not that I'm giving in or anything, but I guess we could stay for a _few_ minutes..."

"Yay!" I could almost see the confetti pop out from behind Al, and tried to hold down a laugh. "This'll be great! I can't remember the last time I was in a pet shop!"

"Mm." Ed trudged on back to us, dragging his feet as his hand remained in his coat pocket, the other holding his suitcase at his shoulder. "Let's just get―"

"Excuse me. Are you the Fullmetal Alchemist?"

We all looked up, and I turned around to see a dark-haired man a bit older than myself. His stare was on Alphonse, waiting patiently.

Al quickly held up a hand, and I could almost see the blush on his face as his eyes curved. "Oh, no, that's not me. You're talking about my brother, Edward Elric."

"Oh," he looked down, brows furrowing in thought as his hand came to his chin. "'Cause I was supposed to retrieved Alphonse Elric from downtown Kuijec for a State Alchemist license renewal."

Ed and Al held one another's stare. Slowly, Ed dragged his sight to the official. And he grinned, quickly closing the distance and shaking the official's hand.

"Edward Elric, famous Fullmetal Alchemist, at your service!"

"E-edward?" the man replied, then shook his head. "Well, actually, the fuhrer requested _Alphonse_ Elric to be given the examination."

We all stared, confused. Even I understood how strange that was, to an extent.

"Why would Al have to give the report?" Ed asked. " _I'm_ the one that's a State Alchemist, not him."

The official pulled out a small notebook, licking his thumb before thumbing through the pages. "Well..." he drawled, before stopping on one of the last pages. Realization dawned on his face; an expression of surprise, too. "Oh. It says here that 'Alphonse needs to be interviewed for fact-checking and info-retrieval?"

Once again, Ed and Al exchanged glances before Ed shrugged, both eyes closed. "Well, go do what you gotta do, Al," Edward said. "We'll be at the hotel when you're done."

Al nodded, giving a smile. "Sure. I'll see you guys there. Room 403, right?"

"Room 403!" Ed waved as we walked away, stretching his arm out while I gave Al a smile. He smiled back, and soon Ed and I were alone.

" _Interviewed."_ The word was spat from between Ed's teeth. "They're probably integrating the poor guy!"

"Why would they need to ask him anything?" I asked, pondering aloud.

I stopped tapping my chin and looked to Ed as he sighed.

"It's been almost six years since we started the search for the stone underneath the miltary's supervision," Ed replied. "We haven't gotten very far, at least to them. Every year, I gotta write up some report that says why I should keep my license. How we're _so close_ to cracking _something,_ and it'll just take a little more time."

I understood. At least a little.

"And they think you're running out of options," I said, the statement slipping from me. Ed nodded, anyway, and I felt some part of me glow. It cracked in half, darkness swallowing it and overtaking my heart in stone.

"Yeah." he said. "All they know is that we snuck into the Fifth Lab and we were involved in the deaths of Father's Homunculi."

"So they know about Father?"

Ed shrugged one shoulder. "Some of them do, some of them don't. I figure that those in Briggs that helped deal with Sloth are trained not to ask too many questions. But this thing with Al is worrying me more than what anyone else thinks about artificial humans."

He gave a slight motion with his head, towards the direction we parted ways with Al in. "The fact that they're asking Al first instead of me means they're trusting me less... In other words, they're getting suspicious of why we're here."

He sighed, head hanging. "Mustang usually has to sign off on the report's release, but maybe they're not bothering him with it anymore."

I was lost in a cloud of questions I wasn't sure I wanted answers to. I asked one of them.

"Is Mustang the only one in the military that knows about you and Al?"

He nodded. "Him, Riza, and Hughes. Hughes just thinks I lost my limbs in the war"—grinning wide, he turned to smile at me—"he actually doesn't know about Al, after all this time! Pretty good secret keeping, huh?"

I nodded, smiling just as brightly. I envied their ability to hide.

Ed dropped his head back, and seeing his back so slumped... I wanted to reach out, put my hand on his shoulder. Some silent gesture that let him know it would be alright.

Edward spoke again, speaking words that sounded just as dead as I felt.

"I just hope we find something soon..."

We walked in silence, after that.

* * *

Room 403 was nice. I'm sure it was just like all the others, but it was a nice replica of every other room. A nice place; one with a lot of light.

I took a few more steps inside, hearing Ed walk past me, setting his suitcase down and straightening. A smile came to his face, both hands on his hips as he surveyed the room and nodded in approval.

"Yeah," he said. "This is a nice place."

We stayed in silence, before Ed suddenly raised one hand behind his hair, eyes cast away from me. Near the floor.

"I... Was just wondering if I could draw you again."

Shock bellowed into me; enough to frown my mouth and raise my hair.

"W-Why?!" How stupid could I be? How uselessly _obvious_ could I make it?

Ed turned, failing to hide a blush. He shrugged one shoulder, putting the same hand in his pocket.

"Why not?" he returned, cocking his head to one side. "I mean, we _got_ time to kill, before Al gets back, and Mustang gave me the journal-"

 _Sketch book._ I wanted to correct, but my mind bit the thought in half. I couldn't... I didn't even dare...

I lowered my hands away from my mouth, uncurling my fingers and bringing them to my sides, behind me. Wrapping one hand around the other, squeezing tight. Like that would bring the blood into my head. Make me think a little better, a little clearer, a little more.

"Well..."

"C'mon." He gave me a smile. A soft one. "I'm sure you'll look great."

Hearing my name with those words. It nearly shattered a wall. Hanging onto pieces of a building, I swallowed. Failing to conceal a blush, failing to do anything but stand there as Edward walked on, further into the room. One arm shrugging out of his coat, the other arm tucking the sketchbook against forearm and bicep. The red fabric practically peeled off, revealing muscles I hadn't paid attention to before. But here, in the sunlight...

I looked away, feeling my face burn even more. Ed turned around, and I could hear the pleasant grin in his voice.

"There's nothin' to hide!" he told me. With a laugh, he clicked his automail arm. "I should know, yeah?"

 _Mmhm._ I wanted to say, but I just twitched a nod instead.

We sat in the living quarters, him at one end of the couch and me at the loveseat. Drawing utensil in between two flesh fingers. I noticed he had gotten a new one; I guess my current pen wasn't good enough for the Fullmetal Alchemist.

His expression turned focused, and his head tilted to the side.

I tried to ignore the scrutiny, silently watching the wall behind him, off to the left. Eyes drifting to the space where the wall turned into a corner. I wanted to reach out, mold the plaster until it was a part of me. Add another layer to a soon-to-be labyrinth.

I could make it huge, in time.

Ed's voice rang in my ears. I turned, watching him watch me. Some question he'd spoken hanging between us. A pitch I didn't catch.

I'd never been very athletic.

I forced away a smile, eyes closing for a moment. Hiding him away, hiding that expression of concern.

"We don't _have to_ ," he said. "We—"

I quickly shook my head. Anything to make myself uncomfortable. Test my own weak limits. A stick attempting to hold up a stone.

"Let's continue on," I said, eyes curving in a smile. "You still have to capture that thing, don't you?"

Ed smiled, and then he straightened, that smile becoming a full-on grin. He clicked the pen open. "You bet I do! You're not moving an inch until I'm finished." His expression suddenly fell, face growing pale. "Except... This isn't really the right setting."

A smile came to my face as my head bowed, a little defeated. "Of course not..."

Ed remained silent, keeping the pen by his face. He was staring at me still, and I knew I couldn't deny someone the chance to work like this. Especially not when it obviously meant so much to him.

I straightened, looking around the room. "Alright, where do you want me?"

Ed followed the motion, glancing around before pointing with his pen. The window seat, displaying a brilliant amount of light. One that would shine more than enough sun onto me. I couldn't hide away in darkness even if I wanted to.

I instantly hated it.

"There's enough lighting over there." he was saying. "Not a bad place."

"Okay," I suppressed most of a grin at how into this he was getting. Who knew the famous Fullmetal Alchemist could be such an artist?

I stood up, taking a moment to stall. Brush my skirt off, but eventually I had to move.

Birds chirped, greeting me as I walked towards the window. I didn't feel Ed's eyes on me, and that was a good thing. I only had a matter of moments, before every inch of me would be studied.

My lips twisted in a smile. If only he could see how many scars were inside. How would he react? What would he try to draw?

The chirping got louder, the closer I got to the window. There must have been a nest in the tree nearby. I didn't have much of a chance to turn and look as I sat down, my focus taken by Edward as he pulled up a chair about five feet in front of me. He looked up, frowning a bit as he moved the chair closer, then a tiny bit further away.

Seeming pleased with the accomplishment of this important first step, he smiled a bit, the emotion seeming like it was more of a small welcome door to a private personal celebration. I let my smile reach my eyes, seeing him look to me and give the smallest of blushes.  
"Look up." The words were spoken kindly; polite, as always.  
I did as I was told, turning my head and glancing from the side of my vision. "Same position as before?"  
He was holding the pen near his face again, that studying look coming to him. I smiled a bit more, my lips curving just slightly in a light amusement. Then he gave a light shake of his head.  
"No," he replied finally. "Turn a little towards me."  
I did as I was told, meeting his eyes a little more head on than before. His expression just grew a bit more focused. He stifled a sigh; the breath lightly pushing out of his nose. His head shook, telling me to move a little more to the left.  
I did, and a few seconds later moved my head back to the same position with a wider grin.  
He smiled and I recognized that softness again. It made me a bit warmer; a heat I didn't believe to be from the sun shining behind me.  
"Try going back to the left again."  
I obeyed without protest, moving it a bit more than I did before. He nodded a little to himself, finally pleased. From the side of my sight, I watched his eyes sweep over me, trying to make sure the details were right.

He positioned himself to stand up, one hand on the arm of the chair while the arm of the hand holding my sketchbook and pen rested on the opposite arm of the chair. He was turned to the side, staring at the door Al had left through.

"I need my assistant here," he said, but I knew it was more of a light, observational kid than an actual complaint. I smiled a bit more with my eyes, watching him stride over to me.

He leaned down a little, and I couldn't help but notice the tinge of pink in his face as he reached out, gently pulling a section of hair over to the front of my shoulder. I felt the smooth strands brush against my shoulder as they moved, sweeping over my chest and resting on the very end of my stomach.  
"Sorry..." Edward said as he did this, stare avoiding mine.  
I let a grin come to me, like that could do very much for the heat touching my face. "You are the artist, after all. Make me how you want to."  
My comment seemed to make his face a bit redder. I smiled softly, eyes gently following his hand as he reached out, unhooking the hair I had tucked behind one ear. I gently swallowed, a bit out of focus as the back of his fingers brushed against my temple and into my hairline. It was his automail hand, but there was still something about this...  
His fingers trailed down the strand he had guided, seeming like he was measuring the length. I glanced to his eyes; they were focused on my hair still, that blush mostly gone. Back to business...  
His pointer finger shifted, bringing itself to the front of the section instead of the back. He trailed down for a few more inches, still keeping my hair towards him at a slight angle. Then the strand was released, the section tucked back behind my ear once more.  
I held down my laugh with a small grin. At this rate, we would both be nearly dead from old age by the time he was finished with this drawing.  
My thoughts left me as he leaned forward again, his head moving over mine and hiding his face from my limited view. I suppressed a few shivers as his hands came to the back of my neck, sweeping my hair around to one side with a delicacy I'd never felt before.  
He gathered all my hair except the strand he had tucked behind my ear until it rested on one side, falling across the upper part of my body in gentle layers of those crescent waves. Ed moved that same strand again, bringing it over my ear once more before pushing it back.  
I grinned. "That strand's tricky, isn't it?"  
"Yeah." he said quietly, leaning back again. He walked backwards, sitting in the chair with his legs loosely crossed. Regarding me with a critical eye I usually saw in serious artists.  
I grinned, and it didn't take him too long to notice there was something behind my smile.  
"What?" he asked, interested.

I gave a small shrug, eyes closing since I couldn't exactly turn my head away. "I just think it's a bit funny how serious you are about this..."

He flipped open my sketchbook, and for a moment I imagined there was a cloud of dust puffing out of the open pages. He was quickly skipping to the end, seeming like he was trying to find his last drawing as he murmured a reply.

"It _is_ serious..."

That made my heart beat quicker; my smile becoming a softer one. I watched him, my attention fluttering between his turning pages and that expression on his face. I wasn't sure why exactly he was getting so serious about this; that challenge he had accepted about being able to draw was well over and done with. I guess some people were just stuck on their work; I'd been one of them.  
Memories crashed against the heavy door I'd locked them into. I focused, bringing my attention to Ed as he unclicked his pen, other hand smoothing over an already smooth blank page.  
His golden eyes rose, light sweeping over them as he studied me again.  
I held my focus away from the nervous, excited tension in my gut. His eyes kept moving over me, gradually moving along every detail of my hands, my arms and shoulders, my hair. He skipped over my face, opting to trail the outline of my hair before his stare eventually swept down to the opposite side of me. His observation of my chest and stomach was much quicker; definitely more of a scanning once-over than anything else.  
His pen clicked shut. I held down an exasperated groan, disappointed. The emotion reached the space in between my eyebrows, though; my mouth turning down into the smallest of frowns.  
"Let's take a break." he said.  
I was happy to oblige.

We spent a short break talking over the tea provided on the coffee table. Ed iced his, pouring the mug's contents into a tall glass and flicking ice cubes in with thumb and forefinger. I kept mine warm, the temperature matching the slight heat lingering against my back, my shoulders.

We talked of the weather, a nice topic. A safe one. And then it was time to draw again.

My stomach sank, ears hearing a small flock of birds flutter by the window. Two, by the sound of their wings and brief squawking. The nest close by the window remained calm and diligently active.  
I smiled a little, keeping the rest of me pencil-straight. "Will you draw the birds?" I asked.  
"Maybe..." he replied, pen continuing to sketch. The motion stopped; enough for him to quickly glance up, catching the right side of my hair as it began to swoop down beside my face. "Might be a little distracting, though."  
"Yeah," I agreed, pretending to make it seem like I wasn't confused, "You wouldn't want to make the background too busy..."  
He just gave a brief sound of acknowledgment. He stopped drawing, and I looked to see his other hand, the one he wasn't drawing with, had come up to his mouth, the side of his forefinger lightly resting against his lips. I almost laughed; he was picking up my traits... Almost exactly my quirks, anyway.  
He was too deep in focus to notice my silent amusement, glancing up a moment after my inner laughter had fallen back and away. He began sketching again, falling into the same calm but focused pace.  
I liked the silences that came with him drawing. I honestly did.

* * *

It felt like nearly an hour had passed, before anything changed. Me continuing to sit, the sound of him continuing to sketch against the page, filling the silence between us.  
I snuck a peek, looking over just enough to see his head tilted to the side. Focusing a little, staring down at the page. I twitched a larger smile, and instantly his stare snapped to me. I looked back, blaming the sunlight on my back for the heat rising to my face.  
"Somethin' funny?" he asked, a smile in his voice.  
I tried to keep mine to a minimal, forcing myself not to shake my head.  
"No," I said. "Everything's fine."  
He didn't say anything, but I could still feel his stare on me. Waiting for something, but I wasn't about to do anything.  
I resisted peeking another stare, waiting for my face to cool off before I glanced to him again. His eyes were just on their way back down to the page, instantly snapping back up upon seeing mine, I guess. And that small smile on his face grew a little more.  
I looked back, telling him he should keep drawing.  
To my total discomfort, he clicked the pen closed. Fists coming to his jaw, leaning over a little as he rested his elbows against his knee.  
"Nah," he said. "Think I'll just stay like this for a moment. How're you doing posing?"  
I growled a little in my head, scowling just enough for him to see. And laugh, the sound almost enough to warm a wall.  
He finished straightening, slumping back against the chair. Grinning wide at me, and I forced myself to turn and look this time. I had to act like a normal person.  
He laughed again, like seeing my face was enough to skitter sounds of amusement out of him. I suppose it probably did look hilarious...  
I noticed his hand came to his mouth, when he did this, wrist a little limp. Copying me, still. Why?  
"Ah," He stood up, one hand coming to his pocket and tucking the pen inside with it. "You're pretty funny sometimes," he told me, and I only frowned a little more, scowling a bit harder. He just grinned, shifting his weight to one leg. "You wanna order some lunch?"  
I relaxed, wondering about Alphonse. Maybe my thoughts were just obvious; maybe I was losing touch with masking my face, but Ed waved a hand; the one holding the pen between two fingers and over another one.  
"Ah, don't worry about Al," he said. "I bet you anything he's holding himself emotionally hostage at a pet store somewhere."  
I stayed quiet, realizing he probably had a point.  
I watched Ed move towards the coffee table, stooping down to pick up the room service menu. I still didn't understand his change in height, but no one had brought it up since that day at the station in Pendleton.  
I stood, feeling my legs creak as I set weight into them again. And my stare never left Ed, who never stopped looking at the menu.  
He turned the paper over, blinking at it.  
"You feel like having anything on this?" he asked. "I'm not really seeing anything-"  
I stopped close by him, staring at the top of his head. My presence must have been what spooked him a bit, enough to drop his face into a dumbstruck expression of confusion.

"What're you doin'?" he asked me.

I just stared at his head, how the top of it was so much higher than it had been before... Only a few weeks ago, he didn't even come up to the top of _my_ head and here he was surpassing me...

What was it?

I just felt that sense of loss; a lack of stability, I guess.

"Uh," Ed was still trying to get my attention. I flinched, not enough to move my head as his fingertip tapped against my forehead. "This thing on? Anything going on upstairs?"

I instantly stepped away from his touch, violently shaking my head and shutting my eyes. Trying to regain myself, repair a wall that had just cracked.  
"N-no," I told him, but realized I had just answered his question. I forced myself to focus everything on the current moment, leaving the wall to bleed out concrete.  
"I-I was just wondering," I told him, relaxing into a standing position again. Hands still held at the front of my skirt. I drifted my eyes up to the top of his head, the hook of his hair that bowed towards me.  
I was thankful, a little, when he bowed to one side, groaning out a sigh as he slouched over.  
"Don't tell me you're―"

"I am!" I replied, feeling another wall break a few more inches in, interrupting him like that. "It's not normal to grow like that, Ed!"

I didn't add how I _didn't_ think it was normal. I didn't know anything about the average rate of height increase, but then again I barely knew anything at all.

Another crack.  
I had to make this quick, escape to a bathroom or somewhere private to repair.

He didn't deny the abnormality of it all. Instead pushing a hand against his hair, straightening and sliding one foot back.

"Look," Ed told me, "the last thing I want you to do is worry about something as insignificant as a _height_ increase," he looked over to me, hand dropping to dive into his pocket again. "It's absolutely fine; trust me. There's no point in getting flustered like that about nothing."

I... I guess he had a point. I was just wasting time; his time, things he could've been doing instead of telling me things I should've already known.

I apologized quietly, looking away. Shifting a little on my feet, leaning my weight over to the coffee table.

"N-no," he replied, and I looked over at him, surprised to see his face a little pink. Hands waving at me. "It's nothing to be ashamed for," he told me, and some part of my brain broke, hearing that lie. "I-it's great you're worried and everything."  
His face just plummeted into a shade of red, and his hands stopped fanning from side to side. Fingers clenching inwards a bit.  
"Uh."  
I wasn't sure what to do; it wasn't something I knew about, helping someone recover from a hole they'd just dug.

I looked at him, watching his hands as they moved away from me. Cautiously retracting, his stare still a little wide. And then he grinned, completely playful.

"I-I mean," His hand scratched at the side of his face a little bit, suddenly nervous again. His hand suddenly came to my head, a little rough as he ruffled the top of my hair. "If I wasn't tall, I couldn't do _this!_ /"His hand plopped onto my head, ruffling my hair. Still so gentle, and I couldn't help but smile through my confusion. He was such a doofus sometimes...

I smiled anyway, resolving I had done enough talking.

I excuse myself to the bathroom soon after.  
I shut the door behind me, leaning against it and breathing out a sigh. Deflating the pressure from my body, my chest, and feeling it all sink back in when I breathed in. Growing again, and beginning to adapt the walls I was surrounded by. The painted wood and tile decorations lining the center. I focused on the mirror, especially, wanting to really take in the fact that my reflection was over an armslength from myself. That if I just looked over, I'd see the face I hated most. I'd see the person I had turned into, the one I was left to destroy without hesitation.  
I molded those walls, turning them into concrete. Adding half a layer, wrapping it around, the mirror and my disgusting reflection acting as the second half.  
I waited until I could breathe right. Until I could feel that weight constantly sinking my lungs back down and stay heavy even when I breathed. I waited until I understood the balance of it all again, and then I stepped outside.

He had the coffee table decorated in food. Plates, bowls, a bottle of wine in the center with two cups turned upside-down.

His way of telling me not to worry, I guess.

I stood, one hand still on the doorknob of the bathroom. I was at a loss for words, remembering he'd said he didn't see anything appetizing on the menu... And here was all this food...  
He kept grinning at me, hands in his pockets as his weight kicked to one side.  
"Pretty awesome, right?" he asked. "I had them do an express delivery; the service in this place is great!"  
I twitched out a smile, staring at him again. Thankful his eyes were curved enough to close.  
"I... Didn't think you wanted to eat―"

He held up a finger, shushing me with skitters of sound. One eye opened.

"Didn't say anything of the sort," he replied, tilting his head to the side. "What in the heck are you talking about?"

I didn't know. I just looked back down, staring at all the food. Wanting to tell him he'd be the one eating most of it...  
When I opened my mouth again, he silenced me once more.  
"Ah."  
I tried again, once again blocked by that word.  
"Ah."  
I soured, eyes bulging as he stepped up to me, holding a plate of desserts out with both hands.  
"Have something sweet," he said.  
When I just looked back down, he nudged the plate a little, enough to gently jostle the cookies an inch or so into the air.  
I glanced up, seeing he was still smiling softly. Like a little kid.  
I tried to reach for one, but that plate moved again. Sending the cookies just out of my reach.  
He grinned wide, and I almost yelled at him.  
"Here," he said, jostling the plate again. "Just take one."  
I tried to, seeing the plate move backwards, just out of my reach again.  
"Ed..."  
"What?" he said, teasing with his head tilted to one side. "Just take a cookie."

 _I can't_ , I thought. _you keep moving the plate._

He said my name through light laughter. "Just take a cookie," he told me.

My frown increased, and part of me tapped into a place I hadn't been in a long, long time. My hand snapped out, and snatched a cookie before Ed could pull the plate back in time.

I grinned, triumphant, and tried to fight back to feeling of my chest collapsing. Ed laughed enough for his shoulders to bounce.

"Guess I underestimated your speed," he said.

He placed the cookies on the coffee table as I looked around again, gently moving away from the bathroom, or the only sanctuary I had in this place.

"Are you sure this isn't too much?" I asked, regarding the food again.

"It'll be fine," Ed replied, flopping on the couch and fanning out his arms. "I mean, do you see how much I eat? I'd be _rolling_ from place-to-place if I wasn't helping out Al's body."

I smiled, laughing a little behind my hand, taking it away only when I had to speak. "Yeah, I guess you're right! You _do_ eat a lot..."

He grinned right back at me, tilting his head a little. "What's that supposed to mean?"

I straightened, shock perking into my face. "N-nothing!" I told him. "Nothing-I was just-"

His laughter cut me off, his posture doubled-over and hiding his face from me. But when his head rose again, I saw a brilliant grin on his reddening face. "It's almost too easy to get you flustered!" he told me. And I blushed, probably matching his shade but for a different reason.

I looked away, only partially feigning irritation.  
"Are we going to finish this sketch or what?" I asked.

He stood up, striding over to me with his hands in his pockets. "Yeah, yeah. Hold your horses."

He walked on by, placing a biscuit in my mouth. "Here. Have a crumpet while you wait."

I glared at the back of his head, seeing his hand half-curl in playful defense and seeing that grin on his face again. I took the food out of my mouth.

"This is a biscuit." I told him.

He shrugged, pouring another cup of tea. "Same thing."

I sighed, wanting to tell him that they kind of _weren't_ , when my own thoughts stopped me again. Dragging me back down. What was I doing? Thinking I could have fun like this? That I was actually smart enough to correct him on _anything?_

What was I even thinking, acting like I could correct him on anything? Acting like I was smart enough to do anything of the sort?  
"Hey."  
I looked up, back to Ed. Trying to conceal myself again. He only grew more worried, tea positioned by his mouth. Lips that moved behind the steam to ask another question.  
"You okay?"

I nodded, hands behind my back. "Yeah! Perfectly fine!"

He moved a little closer to his tea, bowing slightly. Eyes never leaving mine. "Okay..." he said quietly, before those eyes of his searched my face. "Smile more," he said, bringing the mug up to his mouth. "I think it'll help with the drawing."

I noticed his face tinge with red before he instantly sipped his tea, taking a gulp that was much too hot. I raised a hand to my own burning face, wanting to ask if he was okay.

He answered the question I never spoke aloud, bent over with one hand on his knee, the other toasting with his mug. "I'm okay! Fine! Just warming up my mouth! Gotta keep the tastebuds sharp and all!"

I had no idea what to say to that, so I just kept smiling.

He smiled back.

We talked over tea, wine, and fine cheese, during that first break. It was... Something I just might be able to get used to.

"Is your mouth okay?" I asked him, taking my place at the windowsill again, stomach pleasantly filled.

I briefly caught a glimpse of him blushing again, his head bowing a bit more towards the paper.  
"Yeah," he replied in a murmur, "It'sokay."

I quirked my lips in a bigger smile, realizing Ed was so weird sometimes. I can't be sure, but I thought maybe he smiled a little too, before looking back down again. But as soon as his eyes glancing up, I returned to my normal position. Crossing my legs, placing one hand on my knee and the other hand right on top of it. My smile, however, was something I changed. I placed my lips in mostly a dipped curve, small but hardly the width of a c. It was enough to make him laugh, and from the very corner of my vision, I saw him double over, one hand pushing back the side of his bangs.

"What is that smile?!" he asked, laughing through his words. I had to fight back the amusement wanting to go past my throat, keep the smile on my face without twitching it upwards. "What-"  
His words ended there, taken over by a deep breath that released more laughter. More sounds I had to fight to keep myself from releasing as well.  
I spoke through the very corner of my lips, voice pinched.

"What?" I said. "This is how I normally smile, Ed."

He laughed again, the sound reduced to a low giggle against closed, smiling lips. His hand raised near his mouth, too, and it took me more than a moment to register he was picking up my traits. Why? Why would he do that to himself?

His throat cleared, posture straightening and his smile never faltering as he shifting how he sat with one hand on the seat below. His eyes rose to me as he did this, and softly he shook his head, eyes closing again.

"Keep the smile," he said, and a tinge of pink touched his face. "I like it."

I tried to hold down my grin. I really did.

Ed bowed a little, laughs belting against his smile again, and I nearly broke my position, settling instead to just close my eyes in playful defeat.

"We're never going to get this done..."

But eventually, we did.

Alphonse came in, while Ed and I were finishing up the last quarter of the wine, the sketch book lingering at the table's edge. When the door opened, and Alphonse smiled, Edward's head bowed, casting shadows over his eyes. When he spoke, Ed's voice was suddenly lower, quieter. A roughness to it. "That bet." he began. "The one we made when we were kids. What was it about?"

Al seemed surprised for a moment, but quickly his demeanor matched his brother's. He too grew solemn. Mourning, almost.  
Ed didn't wait for him to respond. He got up from the couch, speaking to himself this time.  
"Yeah, it's him."  
I looked up, wanting to ask how he knew. My attention was captured by Alphonse, however, when the younger Elric grinned with his eyes.  
"I see you have the sketchbook out!" he said. "Have you been drawing again, brother?"  
Ed paused, the steps that were carrying him to the kitchen stopping. He looked back, allowing me to see the blush on his face as Al picked up the sketchbook.  
"Uh..." Ed tried to smile. "Y-yeah, I mean, just a little bit."  
Al must have gotten to the right page because his eyes went wide. "Wow! This is even better than the last one!"  
Ed straightened, blinking. "You think so?"  
Al nodded. "Yeah. I like your use of shading. You got that smile on her face, too."  
Ed gave me a small grin. "Yeah, well, she's a good model. Didn't even move an inch when I was trying to draw her!"  
I blushed, searching for some comment to deflect the attention and put it back onto Ed. I found one, and with a sly look to the State Alchemist, I sauntered up to stand besides Alphonse.  
"I'm not sure how good it really is," I said, keeping my voice low, "He wouldn't let me see it."  
Ed's pupils slowly expanded, and I didn't miss the way his mouth opened just slightly, partially blocked by the water glass he held. His stare never left me as I looked down to the drawing. My focus flicked back up, barely even seeing the drawing as I met Ed's stare from beneath my eyelashes. I let a sly smirk cross onto my lips, and once again his pupils responded by growing just a little bit.  
I locked away that part of me, innocently looking down to the drawing.

I could do this.

I could scan the page, skim over the drawing and get the general idea of it all. I could do that. I noted his proportions were right; no grotesque lumps on my face. Small smile. He didn't add the birds in, only drawing the cluster of leaves poking out from one side of the window behind me. His lines were better, too; not as sketchy and jagged as they were before. More confident.  
I felt my stomach turn, becoming a little lighter and a bit more nervous. I backed away from the sensation, blinking at the drawing. Telling him aloud that it _was_ much better than before.  
He was staring at me, when I looked to him. Blinking a few times, the rim of the glass perched at his lips.  
"Y-you think so?"  
I grinned, giving one that almost felt genuine. I saw a corner of his mouth curve up before my eyes closed, feigning happiness once again.  
"Of course!" I replied. I forced down a laugh but I couldn't really hold down my smile as I nodded a few times. "It's really great, Ed! You're getting even better at realism."  
He cleared his throat, one hand raising to the back of his head as he looked off to one side of the floor. "Okay. Um, I mean, thanks." He tried to grin, but the expression was horribly forced. Nervous, too. Who knew a few looks and some words would do so much to him?

Al and I smiled to each other, our stares moving back to Edward as the State Alchemist finished taking a sip.

"What did the military want with you?"

"Well, they actually wanted to talk to me about the stone." Al said, and his voice seemed a bit sad.  
Ed was nervous. "N-Not like a 'hey there, Sacrifice' type of talk about the stone, right?"  
Al quickly shook his head. "No! He just wanted to know more about it. What we've found out."  
Ed nodded, taking a seat at the kitchen's bar stool.  
"What'd you tell him?" he asked after a silence.  
"I said a lot about how it's been really hard to find," Al smiled a bit with his eyes, finger still on his chin, "And he replied with 'Well, yeah, of course, it's just taken you guys over six years!' I tried to laugh at that, but it was a bit hard..."

Ed nodded along, using the silence that came between us to take a sip of water.

"So," Al continued, "I mentioned this amulet, and they seemed really interested in that. I mean, it's something that's rumored to be even more powerful than the stone, so of course there's gonna be interest!"

He laughed a little, the sound bubbling from his suit. And Ed smiled just a little.

"Anything else happen?" he asked.

Al shook his head. "Just that your paper is due next week."

Defeat slammed against Ed.

"Dammit..."

He sighed, taking another sip. "Well, guess if they're so interested in this amulet, I could write about that. Use up a few pages on everything we've heard."

Nodding, Al looked back down to the sketch book. He flipped to the previous page, turning back and forth. Comparing the two, I suppose.

"General Mustang is right," Al commented, those eyes made of light disappearing and reappearing as he blinked. "You could definitely sell these drawings..."

"Didn't say that in the damn note he gave me," Ed murmured, glaring off to the side.

"Huh?"

Ed shook his head, dismissing Al's question as he stood. "Nothing. I'm gonna go get some sleep. Trying to achieve perfection takes a lot out of you, y'know?"

I twitched a smile as he grinned, stretching his arms behind his head. With a goodbye, he headed off to one of the two bedrooms, leaving Al and I to quietly talk until the sun's light faded.

* * *

We were on our way out of Kuijec when it happened.  
We were all walking together, headed past buildings and shops and stores, in the direction of the station.  
I didn't spot it. Not at first, anyway.  
Ed was the first to notice something. He stopped, one foot still positioned to take a step. And his eyes were wide.  
"That's..."  
I tried to follow his gaze, not seeing anything in particular.  
"That's...‼!"

"What is it—?" Alphonse's words suddenly cut off as Ed clapped his hands.  
The ground above him rose, catapulting him into the air. Red lightning cracking around it. More platforms came, and I saw where he was headed.  
A flash of light; a shimmer of something grand.  
High above, standing on the tallest building in Kuijec, was someone holding a green Amulet.


	18. Here We Go

My platform deconstructed, gingerly placing me upon the flat rooftop. Memories came back, as I surveyed the landscape stretched out in front of me. Being in Dublith, seeing all those Homunculi for the first time. These didn't look much different, aside from the darker hair color.  
 _"Either she got some nice hair dye just for the hell of it, or something about the process of homunculi creation changed."_  
I shook away Ed's words, watching as the Alchemist on my mind finished walking forward, hands in his pockets. A burst of wind blew, whipping his coat to the side and blowing my hair as well. I lifted a hand, wishing I had something of a hairtie, and tucked it behind my ears, listening as Ed spoke.  
"So tell me," he began, "what're ugly guys like you doing all the way up here, with something as valuable as that?"  
I looked over, seeing the amulet again. Green, beautiful, everything I imagined it to be, if I ever imagined it at all.  
The Homunculus holding it smiled, revealing the teeth of a shark.  
"Wouldn't you like to know, little Alchemist?"  
"You're him, right?" Another one taunted, leaning forward and exposing sharp vertebrae, his black suit stretching with them. "You're the Fullmetal pipsqueak!"  
Ed tsked, and when his head turned, I saw the light glare on his face. "So you been talkin' to Envy."  
They just smiled.  
"Well"—The stone was tossed in the air and caught again. It hopped up, dropping down before being hiccuped again—"You gonna try and get this, or what?"  
Hands clapped, a blade was created.  
"Bring it!"  
It all happened at once  
An alarm went off in the back of my head. I ducked instantly, pivoting around as my attack landed, catching him on the side of his ribcage. Except the blow was only met with a sharp grin, a sharp laugh as well.

My heart and my confidence in everything dropped as if it fell off the edge of this building.

His punch came with a step to the side and memory-instinct-kicked in. I moved, folding the arm and snapping the bone.  
He screamed, I released and backed away.  
It'd been a really long time, since I had activated on someone.  
Memories from another life tried to come forth, but I pushed them away, side-stepping a punch and shooting two fingers into two eyes. My nails were short, but my fingers did the job.  
Word of my instructor screaming in my conscious.  
 _Hands up! I said, HANDS UP!_  
A side kick; a fake that tried to lead into a sweeping hook. I blocked the arcing motion with a slapping hit of the hand, side-stepping in to sweep the leg that held the Homunculus balance.  
So they _could_ fight...  
As he fell, he bent backwards, hands picking him up and flipping him upright and away from me. Acrobatic, too.  
I raised my hands, keeping them loose as I slid my left foot back. Deepening my stance, narrowing my eyes.  
Even still, my heart hammered.  
He tried another kick; a spinning hook that aimed for my head. I ducked it, wind gusting above me, and rose again.

A side kick greeted me, and for a moment, time slowed down. My left foot kicked back against the ground, opening the compartment there. One that was created during a time when I was very paranoid. Ridiculously so. I had a hard time making the circles, but after seeing the bomber, I did a few alterations, and well...  
The Homunculus screamed, body arching forwards as he fell to the ground. "MY LEGS!" Another scream. "What the FUCK did you do to my legs, you BITCH?!"  
Edward flew by, propelled by some ground transmutation. He shot me a grin, hands clapping once and using the floor he landed on to pierce into the female homunculus. The transmutation was some mixture of blue and red.  
"Nice work!" he told me, paying no mind to the blood shooting out of the creature's mouth. "Guess those transmutations came in handy!"  
The disabled Homunculus suddenly grabbed my legs, and I tripped backwards, landing on my hands. I kicked and tried to fight him away, but his hand morphed into a blade. I tried to scream, sensing my voice was the only available weapon before a block of concrete slammed into the Homunculus like a freight train.  
I looked back, seeing Al smile at me.  
"You okay?" he asked.  
I nodded, quickly picking myself up again, trying to ignore the heavy scrapes against my knees. The bleeding wounds along my arms. "Y-yeah. I'm fine."  
Al flashed me a smile, and then his arms were up, blocking a heavy jumping kick-a reverse crescent.

What kind of training did these Homunculi have?

Another attack came, one I ducked again. Moving enough to pivot and strike my other leg out, heel slamming into the Homunculi's face. I pressed a little more weight onto my standing foot, activating the second circle there. A backup; a close-ranged cement transmutation.  
The ground rose up into a sharp spike, nailing through the Homunculi's body. All the way from the groin to the forehead. I slowly retracted my kick, eyes wide and mind trying not to see all the blood that had landed on my legs. Trying not to feel the bits and pieces on my arm or the sick splatters of warmth on my face. I staggered back, trying to keep my hands up.

A scream, one in Ed's direction. I hurridely looked over, eyes wide as something small attached to many tendrils of muscle was in Ed's hand. With another pull, the Philosopher's Stone was disconnected.

Sensing movement, I looked in front of myself again. Even through the spike-a bloodied narrow triangle slammed up through the back of his throat-he grinned.

"Even if I 'die',"-his head turned, moving and craning to the side, red lightning scattering at the motion-"more will come. You can't stop something already happening!"

"Pull out the stone!" Ed yelled, speaking to Al and I. "It's in their chests," he added, speaking to me. And hearing my name set off an alarm inside my head.

Okay.

I ripped into the center of the chest with both hands, short nails combing through muscle. Blood covering my hands, blending into what I was digging into. And then I saw it, in all its hellish glory. The Philosopher's Stone!

I yanked it out, blood spraying up and towards me as the muscles gave way. Pulling apart like a rope fraying. I squinted passed what landed on my face, watching the Homunculus turn to ash in front of me.

"There's so many more coming for you, Fullmetal!" It-they-yelled, screaming at the sky.

Another laugh, this one from the Homunculus disintegrating by Al's hand.

"Oh, how little you know, _Fullmetal Alchemist!_ " It was a scream, a screech that made my hair stand up. Made my blood cells turn to icicles.

What.

What were they planning? What was _happening?_

A glimmer of green caught my eye.

It fell, right from sharp hands.

* * *

The Amulet dropped, its surface snapping in thirds. But the material... I couldn't deny what it was.

Plastic.  
What we were after... Searched for... It was just cracked plastic.  
It was a stillness that even our breath couldn't fill. Ed tried to speak. Or maybe my mind just wanted to hear his voice. Just wanted that distraction. But even then... Even then I was being so selfish.  
His words came so quietly, a broken, shell of a whisper.  
"No."  
No, this couldn't be happening. I knew he wanted to say that, I could feel the words overtaking my own mind as well. Possessing me. Just those thoughts, and the sight of cracked plastic surrounded by smaller fragments.  
"No."  
A bit louder this time. And another sound, one that broke that stillness as his foot dragged against the concrete. Shifting, stepping as his body swayed into a standing position.  
I wanted to crumble right there, just collapse with the emptiness inside me. Bleeding out with invisible "agony" that would pool over my chest.  
I wanted to do something, but the idea was shut inside a room of darkness, overhead light clicked off.  
I didn't deserve to help them.  
I didn't have a single thing I could offer, especially not at a time like this.  
Ed called my name, bringing my stare over to him. In surprise, in shock that he spoke it so calmly. Softly demanding my attention. He was still hunched over, hands deep in his pockets, bangs covering his eyes from me. But I saw his lips move, speaking to Al as well.  
The helmet creaked, bright eyes made of light looking to him. The soul inside saying nothing, and we both waited. Watched as Ed straightened his posture, head tipping back. Bangs sweeping against his cheekbone but not drifting far enough to reveal his eyes.

"Stop looking like somebody just died," he told us.  
I felt words choke against my throat. How else was I supposed to react? What else could I possibly offer in return, if not mourning for something I never completely had?  
But I stayed silent, quiet as always. Listening, watching, his feet shift and boot slide as he turned around. But his steps didn't drag; his movements calm, collected. One after the other, completely sure of himself.  
He stepped onto the ledge of the building, a click sounding as his left leg moved up, metal foot joining his right. Balancing himself completely. He spoke as he did this, a soft wind hollowing us out more so than we already were.  
"So they're comin', just for me, huh?" His weight shifted, balancing on his left leg. He began healing, currents of lightning sweeping around his human leg.  
He inhaled; a powerful, controlled breath in. His wounds began healing, red lightning skittering and closing up the cuts and injuries that were hidden from me with his clothes. Internal ones, probably. I saw the lightning go near his face as well, but he didn't seem to notice, and he spoke as this all happened.  
"And they act like they have a shot." Another wound healed, at his leg. His shoe pivoted, digging the ball of his foot into the ground like he was twisting out a cigarette. "Heh."  
He was suddenly pointing out into the city, voice rising to a shout. "Well see if you can try! We'll take all of you on, just wait and see!"  
I felt like my soul just died, hearing that. We had _barely_ survived this fight, and they'd be sending more? How could we... Possibly go on?  
"Hey," He raised a hand, pointing one blood splattered gloved finger at me. One eye closed in a wink, mouth hooked in a grin. "Get that look off your face! We've done this before and we'll do it again!"  
 _Are you sure?_

I couldn't say anything in return. A cut on my cheek spilled more blood―the aftereffect of the Homunculus' lightning as their stone was pulled away―and roughly I dragged the side of my hand across the wound. It stung even more, reminding me of my own immortality.

I couldn't do this. I couldn't even offer him a response. Someone so _strong_ ; so much stronger than me.

Al moved. One foot closer to his brother, and Ed grinned with a snickering laugh. A sleek, hook-like motion of his arm with a thumbs up sign before that hand disappeared into a complete intact red coat. He didn't even rip anything this time, aside from a glove. Was he getting better, or our enemies getting weaker?

My head shook, memories of the bomber cascading down into my consciousness. These Homunculi didn't have explosives, but maybe in time... Maybe in time they would.

Another voice sounded, speaking my name. I looked up, seeing Ed give me that soft smile. Wind blew again, momentarily hiding us from one another. Ed's bangs died down first, and I tucked mine behind my ears after.

What now? What left is there to do?

Some part of me wanted to look at the broken plastic. The remains of our search. I just remembered Edward on that hospital rooftop, a flat surface that supported all three of us. The surface I wanted to throw myself off of, after revealing part of the monster that made up myself.

I wanted to die right then, too, on another rooftop. Wind carrying nothing as I plummeted face-first into darkness.

Ed shrugged one shoulder, the action so nonchalant it nearly sparked anger within me. His eyes closed, head tilting to one side as he said, "So it's one tiny piece of plastic." His hand removed something from his pants pocket, dangling something round and silver. For a moment, I was back on a train, handing a false State Alchemist watch to a childhood friend.

The Alchemist pocket-watch continued to swing, and I just stared.

"It's nothing that's too different than this," he continued on, and spun the chain around his pointer finger, feigning a yawn.

"Brother..." Al looked up, eyes nearly as empty as I felt. "What about you? What about your protection?"

Another sharp grin. The watch was pocketed, and Ed looked behind his shoulder, out into the city's skyline.

"Nothin' I can't handle," he said, voice faint.


	19. Days Like These

Ed was quiet.  
Quieter than usual, that is. Sometimes, I think he would get deep in thought, lost in that brain of his. His eyes would drift to the window, and with gloved palm supporting his jaw, I think he would think. Enough to sort through those thoughts (he was having).  
I wondered what was going through his mind now, but I didn't have to wonder very long.  
"We'll head to Yectora next," he said, speaking to both Al and I. "Ask anyone if they've heard of anything."  
Al was silent, and I forced myself not to nod in the absence of his words. Forced myself not to fill in that blank.  
"And..." I looked over, wanting to ask what was next, if we couldn't find anything.  
Ed just returned his gaze to the window, jaw still in his palm.  
"And then we keep searching," he said. "For everything that happens, there's an equal or opposite reaction. Our bodies got lost in the Gate, so that means there's a way to recover them either here or there."  
 _How do you know?_ I wanted to ask.  
Ed looked down, at the floor beneath us. He stayed quiet, and with his eyes gently searching the decorated carpet, he spoke, voice thoughtful. Like he was postulating the world into a few sentences.  
"When I was stuck in Gluttony's body, I performed a reverse-human transmutation with Envy's stone as the catalyst. I couldn't have gone through my gate without that kind of payment."  
"So..." I blinked, totally at a lost for words.  
Ed let out the smallest/quietest of sighs, but I knew it wasn't directed at me. His head bowed, his hand went limp, and he spoke, words quiet.  
"So what I'm thinking is our solution might be lay somewhere inside ourselves. Maybe, with a tangible enough payment, we can perform a—"  
"Reverse human-transmutation!" Al exclaimed. "Brother, that's genius!"  
Ed grinned up at him, sheepishly. "Well, what can I say? Guess we've come a long way, from building stone horses to hypothesizing reverse-human transmutation."  
Al laughed, while I just smiled.  
My eyes suddenly opened, and I asked a question. Stepped out of the line I had put myself in.  
"But what could act as the stone?" I asked.  
Ed thought, fingertips falling one by one against his cheekbone, heel of his hand holding his chin again.  
"Not sure." Al and I were practically knocked out due to disappointment.  
"Well," Al began as we all picked our heads up, "like Brother said, it has to be tangible. So things like emotions or mental strength are out of the picture, right?"  
"Maybe," Ed replied, thinking hard again. "We sacrificed some blood when we tried to transmute Mom back, but maybe our emotions played a role in the payment, too."  
I thought for a moment, mind receding back to the red light Edward had. The one that took apart the basis of Alchemy altogether.  
"Do you think, with that power you have, you could bypass the law of equivalent exchange when performing a reverse transmutation?"  
Ed placed the nail of his ring finger in between his teeth again, thinking hard.  
"Maybe," he said. "This really should be our last option, though. If it's this powerful with the law, I wouldn't want to find out what happens when it _bounces_ back."  
"That's true," Al nodded.  
"So..." _Until we're on our last leg..._  
They both looked to me, waiting for me to continue speaking. But I looked away, and eventually Ed sighed, relaxing back.  
"Let's just see what else comes up," he said, and we left it at that.

* * *

It was a few hours later that I found myself alone in a bedroom, sitting at the foot.

Even with gentle dabs, the ointment still stung. I focused on the pain, trying to mold it over walls and create higher infrastructures. Better, stronger, less breakable fortresses.  
Al and Ed were in the main room, quietly talking about something I didn't listen closely enough to hear. I heard their voices float to the bedroom, though, a quiet area with two beds. This would be the first time I would share a room with Edward, then.  
I tapped my finger against a wound, gritting my teeth a little to fight back the wince wanting to come out. I had to be stronger than this...  
"Do you want cheese on your sandwich?" Ed walked in suddenly, and I froze, hands positioned to apply the tiny strip to my face.  
He frowned. I tried to grin.  
"Cheese is fine," I answered.  
He sighed, coming over to sit beside me. "What're you doing trying to apply this stuff without even looking?" With gentle hands, he took the strip from me, and I turned my head enough for him to raise it to my cheek.  
I couldn't answer that question. It was buried deep within those walls, near the center they all surrounded.  
So I said the next thing to come to mind, half-wrapping my skirt around my finger. I said the next worse, next stupidest thing.  
"Sorry."  
He just shook his head, and this time when the bandage was laid across my wound, it didn't hurt. His finger traced along one side, ensuring it was completely on, and I swallowed down my gratitude, resolving that I was just better off not speaking right now. His touch left.  
"Hey."  
Ed's voice made me turn and look at him. Meet those eyes set into almost something of a glare. He was angry at me, annoyed, probably. But almost as soon as I turned to face him, the expression fled. Eyebrows raising in surprise as his stare dropped to a spot on my chin.  
"What?" I asked, and raised my hand upwards.  
"Don't touch it," he said quickly, ripping open a new bandage and holding it between two fingers. With his other hand, he swirled a generous amount of clear antiseptic onto the pad of one finger.  
I stared straight ahead, blinking a little as he focused on dabbing a cut that ran across my jaw and chin. Why was he so interested in this one? I had others on my face...  
He softly used a dry side of his thumb to wipe away any excess medicine. And then, when the bandage was applied even more carefully than the one before, he pulled away from me, grinning wide.  
"There! That was almost too close!"  
"Too close to what?" I asked, hovering a hand over the protected wound.  
Nervousness shot into his expression, and I saw a light amount of sweat break into his face. "N-nothing! Forget I said anything!" He was quickly standing up, walking backwards to the door with his hands in his pockets and a nervous grin on his face. "You said cheese on your sandwich, right? Any type in particular? Al got two."  
I just shook my head, still a little bewildered. "It doesn't matter," I murmured, lightly touching the edge of the bandage. Why was he acting so _weird?_  
Ed didn't seem to notice I had my fingers on the wound because he was too busy waving to me while leaning halfway out the doorway. "Okay! I'll let you know when it's done!" His nervous laughter disappeared  
I blinked, lightly prodding the bandage and making sure it was on right. Or at least that's the excuse I told myself.  
Suddenly, his voice came from the other side of the wall, low and smooth like usual.  
"Stop touching your face."  
I froze in alarm, fingers curling in a half-formed fist. WHAT THE HECK?!  
He leaned to the side, grinning at me from over his shoulder as Al appeared, carrying a tray over to the room I was in. He was wearing that getup again, and the thought that maybe it was to cheer all of us up brought a smile to my face. I stood up, catching the bandage wrappers and crinkling them into a fist.  
"You don't have to bring it over here, Al," I said, knowing we (Ed) would have to pay a fine if I stained the bed I was sitting on. "I can eat over there!"  
"Oh," Al stopped and smiled at me. "Okay! I'll put it on the table then!"  
I passed through the doorway, looking to the side and seeing Ed leaning against the wall again. Hands in his coat pockets, eyes bright and smiling.  
I couldn't help but give a smile in return, and heard his foot gently push off the wall as he followed me to the table where both our food was waiting.  
The atmosphere was light, but I figured a comet would come crashing down soon. We couldn't keep up the small talk forever.

But it came without going. Those smiles, that laughter at Al somehow getting a slice of cheese on his helmet. I almost gave a real laugh, which caused Ed's fist to bang the table and his face to meet an empty plate. He slid the plate off, handing it to Al.

"Put that in the sink, would you?"

Al nodded, peeling the cheese off and draping it on the plate. "Sure."

The evening was quiet, after that. Ed stood up from the couch, stretching out his lower back and giving the smallest of groans in his mouth, book discarded on the cushion beside him.

"Think I'm gonna go for a walk. The weather's nice enough, anyway."

He turned around, one brow lightly raised. Saying the question he hadn't spoken aloud yet. "Anyone wanna come with?"

My legs hurt, being tucked underneath myself for so long. I set the book on the arm of the couch, hearing Ed grin my name.

"I'll stay here," Alphonse said, and I heard pages slip as he motioned with the book. He stayed where he was, behind the couch and against the wall, as Edward nodded.

The elder Alchemist was right; for an evening in Eyfuzuk, the sky was brilliantly colored and amazingly warm.

Ed gently kicked as he walked, a slow pace with dragged heels. I looked at him for a moment, seeing the furrow in between his brows.

"Is... Something wrong?"

Some part of me reached out, trying to comfort in a blind room. Reaching for the bed and finding it empty of a sleeper.

Ed finally responded, eyes closing away from me.

"There was a sunset like this the last time I went out to visit Mom's grave," he said, voice quiet.

I didn't know what to say. I had never dealt with real death. Real loss.

 _Do you miss her?_ I wanted to know, wanted to ask... Was it any different?

"She's been gone for over ten years," His head rose, eyes cornered with tears and mouth giving a small smile. "And here I am, talking about her like I really knew who she was."

 _You were young,_ I wanted to say. _It wasn't..._

What? His fault? He was just a child... Just a kid... Someone with a sick, helpless mother. A person who couldn't get the right treatment.

My mouth opened, wind pulling in and nearly spilling out into words. I needed to know...

"How often," I asked, "do you miss her?"

A _ridiculous_ question, an immediately retarded skepticism.

But Ed's answer stunned me.

"When my nerves get connected to the automail," he began, eyes opening to sun visors and red skies. "And when my scars act up. It reminds me what I did. What I keep doing."

I was quiet for a beat, and then the part of me that was crying out for some release, some type of healing spoke again.

"Which is what?"

Ed smirked, head lowering and eyes closed to the sidewalk again.

"Searching. Looking for a way to reverse what's gone wrong."

I swallowed, moving away my voice. This was something I couldn't handle.

A permanency I couldn't sympathize with.

"My..." His head shook, wiping away whatever he was about to say. "Hohenheim. He left when Al and I were young. A few months before her death."

"Was he..." the rest died instantly, roadkill on the street. And the nod Ed gave, gaze gently turned away from me, just reinforced the dead animal with another set of wheels speeding by.  
"My mom... She never gave up, waiting for him to come back. Waiting on his return like that, it tore me to pieces." He swallowed, cleared his throat.

I looked down at my feet, unable to offer anything.

Ed continued to turn away from me. Towards the street and the gutters that flanked it.

Why couldn't I offer anything?

"Do..."

 _You_

 _Miss_

 _Him?_

I remembered being on that rooftop again, the hospital where Ed had turned away, spouting bad about his father. I suppose not, I suppose that was enough to answer my question.

 _I'm sorry._ I suppose a new wall was building. One that only offered sympathy to the internal listener.

"There was some money left," he began, "after her death. But Al and I just used any book we could find, researching artificial life and human transmutation."

 _I know what became of that._

He gave a sigh, a narrow tunnel of air through rounded lips.

"I deposited it, when I got my own bank account as a State Alchemist." There was a smile to his face, a nostalgia to his words. "Teacher would have my throat, if she knew."

I couldn't respond. Couldn't answer him.  
The sunset stretched on. It kept spanning outward, a display of beauty I couldn't come close to matching. I thought about Winry, thought about the times she was mentioned and the times Ed became deflated at those words.

I could only think, ponder and wonder to myself. Why people hurt the way they do.

Look at me, trying to be a scholar. Trying to fit into a mold, pretend to wear a hat that wasn't directed at a room's corner, stool under bottom.

I just wanted to help, and knew I couldn't. I couldn't come close to doing so.


	20. Here We Are

I thought about Ed a lot, the next morning. We shared a room, but when I rose from my sleep, his bed was messy and unoccupied. I checked the time, squinting at the numbers.

9:42am. So we'd missed the 9am and 9:30am trains. Were we staying here for another day?

I slipped out of the sheets, padding to the suitcase open to the both of us. Changing into my regular clothes, I thought about sunsets and unspoken words. Syllabus I kept inside, kept hidden. A chamber full of monsters.

They both greeted me warmly, when I stepped out into the living area.

"Are we staying here for another day?" I asked. My head tilted to one side, my eyes awake and mind exhausted. Luckily supported by hundreds of walls.

Ed nodded, eyes curved in a smile just as big as his lips. "Yep! We'll do another day of research with the books we have and then get on our way!"

"What..." I was looking for something other than the two books between them, when Al reached down to the space beside and below.

A huge stack slammed onto the table, knocking me out for a moment. Waahh...?

Ed snickered, Al laughed in that way of his. I muffled sounds against my lips, and after a sip of the tea waiting for me thanks to Edward, I sat down and opened my first book.

Immediately, small and closely spaced text greeted me. A picture of an hourglass came as well. I stared, having to pull my head back and squint a little. Why do they made the writing on this so tiny?  
"Here." Ed took the text, offering me his. "This one is just explaining the salamander's fire." His forefinger rested against the middle margin of the left page. "It picks up there."

My eyes focused, noticing the text was much bigger. I sighed a little. "Thanks."

He nodded, seeming happy to do it, and I felt my insides die a little. A burden. That's all I was.

The morning passed by in pages and unrelenting researching. Nothing about anything more powerful or parallel to the Stone...  
Fantastic.

The stacks we had borrowed were finished, by the time the sun disappeared.

"I think I'll go watch the sunset!" Al chirped, one finger up.

Ed and I both nodded, eyes and lips in a smile. When the door clicked shut, it was quiet.

The clock ticked on, and I thought about seconds. Each one passing by like grains of sand inside an hourglass. Just continuing on, leaving us both to wear away.

I thought about the wounds that were healing, on me. The ones inside stayed damaged, scabs that never closed and scars that never healed over.

Ed closed his book, looking up to give a loud yawn. I blinked, eyes heavy, and looked over to the clock. So it was dinner time already.

"I'll grab a menu," Ed stood, two fingers pressing against the text for momentum, and a moment later he was holding a list of food we could order.

I scratched at a band-aid on my face, the one near my lip.

"Stop that." He spoke quietly, gently, as if he really did care.  
And I knew the thing he wasn't saying. How he didn't want me to get hurt. And that was a given, every time we went outside and saw one of those things.  
My thoughts drifted to him, how he must be feeling with having those creatures after him. He didn't need to be worrying about me, too...  
I stopped scratching, trapping my hand in between my crossed thighs, the digit hiding away in an expanse of black created by my skirt.

It was strange, that darkness. I molded it, beginning to create another wall as Ed strolled up to me, still looking at the menu.

He shrugged his arm, hand motioning to what it held. "There's pasta," he remembered, noting my last choice. It had been rich, rich enough to fill me within a few bites. He remembered such a small detail, and it was enough to fill my cheeks with the red of a tomato.

"Y-yeah," I stammered, and I noticed he did nothing but flip over the menu.

"And then there's meat..." For him, I supposed. I softly shook my head, wanting to erase the thought. What else did he eat, if not that?

 _Everything,_ I answered, placing my elbow on the table, hand finding the start of my hair.

When digits had escaped into dark locks, he placed the menu on my book, twisting it so I could see the choices.

"Not sure what you want..."

I blinked, staring down and not seeing much. My stomach whined in protest, but my brain couldn't synchronize. I blinked once more, and my other hand flipped the menu.

Lobster. I remembered Dublith, dining for the first time with Edward. How he'd caught me staring and his sense of detail filled in the rest.

I smiled a little bit, and nostalgia did the rest.

I tapped the base of the menu, right where the "L" began.

"Lobster?" Ed repeated. And then he grinned, eyes curving alongside his smile. "Lobster it is then!"

I leaned back a little bit, stretching sore muscles between my shoulder blades as Ed dialed in our order. The phone returned to its holder, and Ed's hand remained gripping. He seemed like he was thinking about something, faint color tinting his face.  
I didn't ask like I should have. I didn't ask if he was okay.  
I cleared my throat, putting a hand up to my mouth. I wanted to know...

Ed suddenly pulled away, head shaking a little bit. And then he noticed me staring, that hook of his hair standing as he blinked once, more color streaking across his face.

"W-what?" he asked.

I waved both hands until they blurred. A physical wall, I suppose. "N-nothing! I... I was just wondering who's paying, that's all!"

At my reference to the bill that came just before the meal, Ed's eyes curved. Just at the bottoms, just enough to let me know he was okay.

He grinned. "Think I'll beat you to it this time."

My mouth hooked in a smile, seeing the challenge.

"Not if I beat you to it first."

"More like 'not if you beat me first'." Ed murmured, flopping onto the couch with his legs loosely crossed. "You definitely know your stuff when it comes to fighting, that's for sure."

I felt the tears well in my eyes before I could force them down. Fight them away. No, Ed, the only thing I was good at was lying and running.

Maybe my eyes had gotten red; maybe there was a shimmer that wasn't caused by the sunset's light. Either way, something caught Ed's attention. But the ring of a doorbell interrupted us.

We both stood at the same time, and then Ed suddenly widened his eyes, staring off at some space behind me.

I turned, seeing nothing but hearing footsteps run. _DAMMIT!_

"And there you go!" He was already at the door, handing more than enough money to the bellboy.

I was burning with rage, starting my own fires, I was sure.

* * *

I survived dinner with small bites and smaller words. Focusing on my food, focusing on eating just enough for them not to notice anything was wrong. I was getting good at it, hiding—so much better than I was before. Smiles were easier to fake, laughs were easier to do. Hiding whatever "pain" I felt behind some wall I had created days if not weeks ago.

The evening passed by in a blur of fruitless research. I wondered how they had survived, what fuse they had to light in order to keep their passages bright. Keep their lines readable and their hearts light.

Look at me, trying to be a poet.

When night swept over the town, I was sitting on my bed, looking at my leg's scar. The only one physically visible to anyone. I traced the side of my calf, feeling the raised skin that was tightly stitched together.  
They had done a nice job, fixing it up. But I wanted it to be worse.  
I wanted my skin to reflect what I felt inside.  
I wanted those scars to be in places people could see, even if they weren't intimate with me.  
I nearly laughed at such a hilarious thought.  
Ed strolled in, golden eyes glancing my way. And with a small smile, he picked up a book from his suitcase.  
"We'll go shopping tomorrow," he promised me. "Get some new clothes."  
My eyes went a little wide, hearing that. I wanted to quickly shoot down the idea, say it was a useless thing to do and we _certainly_ didn't need to spend the money, especially not on someone like me!  
But my mouth remained silent and my eyes remained down. Only peeking back up when my peripheral vision noticed Ed stop in the doorway. I looked to him, failing to hide a smile as he remained standing, book open between two fingers and a smile on his face. Smiling at me.  
I couldn't help but smile back, a blush coming to my face.

* * *

I picked the first and closest shop, when Ed asked where I wanted to go. Somewhere local, some place where we could get in and out fast.  
He didn't object, just smiled and strolled alongside Al and I.  
"How did your military call go?" Al asked.  
Ed peeked up at him, and with his hands still in his pockets, he shrugged. "Ah, wasn't too bad. Just checkin' in with the folks. You know how it is."  
"Oh, look at that." I tried to remain cheerful, sure I was miserably failing at it. I stopped in front of the door, watching Ed hold it open and present the inside with the widest of grins. "We're already here."  
Ed let me go first, and it felt weird walking in, with them behind me. Usually I was either in the middle or the _back._ So we strolled in, comfortable music greeting us overhead. A shopkeep rose from picking something up off the floor and smiled at me. His stare darted to Edward, and he beamed a grin.  
I tried not to be too suspicious of it, resulting it was my own paranoia instead.

I found the pants section fairly quickly, and browsed for a pair of black shorts. It wasn't long before I found one.  
I'm pretty sure they were my size. I quickly checked the inner tag, confirming they were the right number. But just seeing the size shot memories into me; a deep pain that broke some part of myself. Some part that was actually foolish enough to try and make "progress".  
"You find something?" Ed's grinning voice caught my focus, stealing my attention and moving air back into my lungs.  
I slid a foot back, one hand moving to my hair, trying to distract myself with the feeling of something in between the spaces of my fingers as I replied. "Yeah. I think I'll just get these."  
I heard him step forward a bit, trying to see what I had picked out. I turned to face him, grinning as I held the shorts out in between my fingers.  
"They're great, right?" I said, stretching out the fabric just a little bit in playful bounces. "Cheap and completely practical! Don't need a single thing more!"  
Ed stayed quiet, staring at the shorts with his head cocked to one side. Then his eyes grew a bit wider, a blush instantly coming to him along with a small sound of realization.  
He looked away, curled hand coming to his mouth. "Uh, yeah, sure," he replied. "If that's what you want..."  
His stare turned back to the shorts, brows furrowing in concern. Those eyes looked to mine.  
"You sure?"

I nodded, lowering the pants as if they gave me the barrier I hoped they would. "Y-yeah," I replied. "This is all I need."  
His stare swept away from me, trailing along higher racks. The more expensive items, probably. Things I didn't think to really take in.  
"Yeah, I know," he said, and the space between his brows wrinkled a little more in a concern, "But is there anything you _want?_ "  
I almost opened my mouth to tell him that really didn't matter, but Al's voice suddenly cut through our conversation. Bellowing my name and shattering an outer wall.  
I whipped around, brushing my hair back and revealing a sight I never wanted to see. A shirt-a frilly, pink shirt with a orange cat on it.

He fluffed it out with two bounces, two tugs on the sides. I cracked a grin, looking the shirt over again. Something I would be incredibly embarrassed to be seen wearing in public. But he seemed so happy with it; I couldn't say no.  
"That's adorable, Alphonse!" I said. "I can wear it as a night shirt!"  
Al nodded, smiling right back at me. "Okay! I'll pick you out a bigger size then."  
As he dug through the rack, Ed shifted his weight to one leg, glancing between the shorts I still held out between my fingers and my face.  
"You're positive you don't want anything else? I'm sure there's more than a pair of undershorts and a cat shirt here..."  
"Like more cat shirts!" Al called out, and I saw a few shirts fly our way.  
Ed caught them with one hand, frowning a little more as he held one out in front of him.  
"Al!" he yelled. "This is a _poodle!_ "  
He briefly turned his hand around, letting me laugh at the adorably poofy white dog with its pink tongue poking out of the corner of its smiling mouth. His expression stayed mostly in a frown, but I thought I saw his eye twitch upwards in a smile as I laughed.  
"So what?" Al replied, searching for more clothes in a different part of the store now. "Poodles are cute!"  
Ed sighed, looking back to the shirt. He gestured to it, jerking the fabric to me briefly. "You want this one?"  
I grinned a little more, about to say "sure why not" when my smile fell.  
"How much is it?" I asked, glancing to the other shirts in his arm. Searching for the tags myself.  
Edward shook his head, briefly tossing the shirt up before allowing it to land on his arm, draping it over like a butler. "Don't worry about the cost," he told me, and my stomach fluttered at the sound of my name.  
I forced the feeling back, trying to smile as Al's voice filled the store. Filling it enough to rattle the walls with sound.  
"AH THIS ONE HAS A _DINOSAUR_ ON IT!"  
"Al!" Ed yelled, throwing his head up to the ceiling. By now, I knew he was just kidding around.  
"What?" Al returned, tone playfully agitated. Part of the act. He held up a large shirt with a ferret and a rabbit on it, gently waving it. "Do you _know_ how rare it is for us to do anything like this? This is great!"  
When Ed turned back around, there was a soft smile on his face. Similar to the one he kept giving me. The Alchemist met my stare again, and I averted my eyes, feeling a slight amount of heat rise to my face. I distracted myself again, stepping to the side a bit and calling to Alphonse with a nervous smile.  
"H-how many shirts are you getting again, Al?"  
Al stood up, a few shirts on his helmet and shoulders; one of them hanging from the point of the horn on his head. He gently picked this one off, adding it to the large pile in his arms.  
"Not too many..." he said quietly.  
I laughed behind my hand, catching the sight of Ed grinning before my eyes closed. When I focused back and returned my stare to Al, I held my hands together in front of myself, trying to not be so nervous. I didn't want this to be obvious.  
"Just... Maybe pick out a few, okay?"  
Al looked down at the heap in his arms. He looked back to me, and then nodded with determination.  
"I'll narrow it down!" he smiled. "It'll be hard, but I'm sure I'll be able to pick out the perfect shirts!"  
I did my best to smile back.  
Ed started passed me, hands in his pockets and head held high. "Let's go find you something else. We're not leaving this place with shorts and a bunch of animal shirts."  
His hand left his pocket as he said this, fingers tugging on the shoulder of my sweater. Briefly, gently. I turned just in time to see that smile on his face, golden eyes meeting mine. And then he had walked passed me completely, his hand back in his pocket, and I was turned around completely. I sighed, not loud enough for him to hear. With a glance to Al, who was busying pondering over a brown shirt with a yellow lion on it (its nose and mane shaped in a heart), I had no choice but to follow Ed.

* * *

I kept behind, staring mostly at the back of Edward's head. The part where his hair gathered together and began the first braid, the first out of six. We stopped at the adolescent section, Ed's quiet but hopeful words fueling another search.  
He looked at a white shirt, and a tiny smile curved onto his lips suddenly. I wondered what thought just flitted through his mind.  
I focused back on the shirt he held out, the last one. A fox lying down, bushy tail covering one back leg, one yellow eye open and a sly smile curving its mouth. I looked back to Ed, and gave a nod.  
"I like that one," I said quietly.  
He flipped the shirt around, smile vanishing as he looked at the design. "I didn't even see what this one was."  
And then some grin flashed onto his face as he tossed the shirt up, catching it with his arm again. I smiled a little, feeling a laugh try to bubble behind my lips.  
"What're you thinking about?" I asked, only feeling a flash of pain at the intrusion.  
Ed met my stare again, slight red tinting his cheeks before he shook his head. "Nothing," he said. "Let's keep searching."  
We didn't get much, leading us to pass by a section filled with undergarments. Things that sent me to another part of myself.

Ed blushed furiously, seeing the mannequins and lace designs.  
"Y-you don't..." he tried to ask, and I quickly shook my head.  
"N-no. I don't need any..." I finished, feeling my face grow even hotter. I already had enough as it was.  
"Cause, y'know"-he grinned, but the expression was perfectly innocent-"If you wanted, we could get it."  
We. I eyed him suspiciously, raising an eyebrow.  
"You're not paying for this, Ed," I told him.  
He just grinned a little more.  
"Let's just see who gets the bill first."  
I sighed, head bowing low. Sure...

I looked up, noticing he had stopped and that we were in a different section. I looked at what he held out. A thin tank top. But I couldn't expose my arms.  
I couldn't let him know that, either.  
I stared at the garment, asking one of the few questions that came to mind. My brow twitched in time with my heartbeat, as I spoke the words.  
"D-do you really think pink would look good on me?"  
He nodded, looking around to the upper racks again.  
"I think any color would look good on you," he replied quietly, a deeper shade of crimson flushing his face.

W-what?

"Y-you..." the words died at my throat.

* * *

but when it came time to pay, the numbers I was dreading were recited and handled before I could get my wallet.

The employee only focused on Edward, mustache bouncing with every word.

"You want your change back?"

I looked over to Ed, who glanced at me before grinning at the employee.

"Don't worry about it," he said nervously.

"What's he talking about?" I asked, although it didn't really belong to me, the answer...

Ed grinned even wider, and I swear I caught a drop of sweat near his temple. "N-nothing! Just palin' around, you know how guys are!"

The shopkeep blinked once, then with a rather dead face, turned to me.

"He's lucky he's got a lady like you at his side."

I blinked, trying to ignore how my stomach grew a little heavy at those words. "What do you mean?"

The merchant glanced up, my clothes stopping halfway into the bag. His stare shifted in between Ed and I. "You two 're a couple, aren't you?"

My face grew so hot I thought it would melt off, and I instantly heard Ed yell something about how we weren't. I looked over to see his head shaking so fast the redness of his face was blurred.

"N-No, we're just friends! I wouldn't-" he stopped, wide eyes on me. "N-not that you're not _really_ beautiful or anything" His eyes went even wider, and he pushed a hand into his hair as his stare dropped to the floor. He forced a breath through his mouth, trying to continue on, "I-I mean-"

He kept rambling on, constantly tripping and trying to correct himself. My mind was stuck a few seconds in the past. Did he really just say what I think he did? He... Even included my name with that word...

He even included my name right after. But they didn't sound right; it didn't make sense. I kept trying to connect them together but they were puzzle pieces that didn't work. They were pieces that belonged to _completely_ different pictures.

With his hands on the counter, the employee leaned back a little, expression twisted. "Who goes to all this trouble for a friend?! You curved or somethin', kid?"

Ed relaxed, raising a brow. "'Curved?'" he repeated. Realization knocked into his face. "Oh, I get it; not straight." Then he was FUMING, hand raised in a fist and steam blowing from his nose. "WHAT THE HELL GAVE YOU THAT IDEA?!"

"Oh, I don't know," the employee shouted, their faces close to one another, "Maybe just the braid! I thought you were a girl when you first walked in here!"

I resisted the urge to cough behind my hand, remembering how I had made the same mistake when I saw them back at the station all those weeks ago.

The comment just made Ed even angrier. "Y-You thought I was a GIRL?!" he yelled at the employee. "I THINK THE BRAID LOOKS AWESOME! IT'S NOT GIRLY AT ALL!"

The employee leaned away. "Pfffth. _Yeah_ , okay, Rupunzel."

Ed nearly collapsed onto the counter, held up by his forearm. His voice was muffled, defeat in every word he spoke.

"Let's just go..."

He held out a hand, and the employee slapped a small stack of cash into his palm. The remaining money...

"Thank you." Ed slumped away from the counter, swaying a little as he picked himself back up. His state dropped to the bag I held in my hands, and a small smile came to him.

He swayed a little, a small smile coming to him as he looked down at the bag I held in front of myself, holding with both hands. He grinned a little. "So we left with a pair of shorts and a bunch of animal shirts." His head hung, pure defeat radiating off him. "Just as planned..."

I _really_ didn't want him to spend any more money on me. But I hated seeing him like this even more. So I stepped forward, my voice perking his attention.

"What would you like to buy me?"

He paused before a small blush came to him.

"Anything you want," he replied in a murmur.

I smiled. "Ice cream it is, then!"

He blinked, and then the most brilliant of grins came to him. Almost washing away all the pain I felt, uttering such words. Syllabuses that roped me back so far into the past, with me standing in a living room and Ed half-yelling at me from a couch.

A date. I could do a date.


	21. Fragments

We stopped for ice cream, on the way out of town. And I did my best to smile, as a treat-filled cone and spoon were handed to me. Practical, sweet. I could do this.

I tried to breathe right, when we sat down. Ed with his triple scoop and me with my single. Raspberry, one for both of us.

Ed grinned at me, pink tinting his cheeks. I smiled enough for my eyes to curve, enough to hide away in that darkness for a moment or two. Stabilize a wall, keep it from fracturing.

Just breathe. Just keep breathing. Talk about something worthwhile.

"So..." my fingertips drummed one-by-one against table. "Nice weather, right?"

Ed nearly choked, a muffled sneeze-like sound coming to him. He smiled, muting his laughter as he looked to me. "You okay," he asked, and once again my name shot pain into my heart.

"Y-yeah," I waved a hand ferociously, fast enough to blur. "I'm fine! Don't worry about it."

My voice went up a few octaves, fingers pulling back and protruding my palm as if I wanted to strike him with it.

Ed just nodded, tongue lapping up a side of his cone, where ice cream had drooled. I swallowed my own spit, carefully digging into my dessert, twisting and pushing in the same motion. It was an intricate process, one that took me into an almost meditative state. Just act normal. Act like you're not breaking down.

But it was hard. Harder than I expected, to push myself without anyone noticing. Al was reading at a table close by, and I tried to focus on him. Tried to eat what he couldn't.

I tried, and like every time before, eventually I succeeded.

* * *

Days came and went, time passed in between hands of cards and naps until the sun set and we settled down for the night in an inn. When two rooms were forced to one, Ed would always offer the bed to me, resorting to sleep on the couch. Al would usually stay up, pouring over Alchemy and theory books just as much as the lamplight poured onto him.  
It was a cycle I got used to. I found myself laughing more, able to fake higher pitches and bigger smiles. Able to stretch the silences on for another moment or two.  
Ed never noticed these pauses.  
He stayed laughing or staring, a kind gaze that usually drifted down, that soft smile placed upon his face.  
I tried not to notice how a blush usually touched his face as well.  
Sometimes a wall would break; a slight crack snapping into the structure. My own thoughts or Ed pulling up a childhood memory between the three of us the source of the fractures. The memories, thankfully, were rare, and I was able to hide away in smiles and nods whenever they were mentioned.  
Fragments of an old life.  
There was a part of me that couldn't help but wonder... If he saw me in such kindness, such careful nostalgia, what did he think of me now? What did he consider me to be?  
It was an answer I knew all too well.  
Nothing... that's all I was. Just an empty shell of a person. A fragment of who I used to be.  
No; not even a fragment. An inverted, microscopic cell of who I once was. A twisted smile of an avoided reflection.  
I was the best liar I knew.


	22. Happy Birthday, Ed

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BROTHER!"  
Streamers and confetti popped out, and like Al had told me to do, I blew on the small rolled up noise maker. The plastic tube unraveled, releasing a loud whine. I took it out of my mouth, holding it a few inches away and failing to suppress a grin from the sound it just made. It tickled a little, too.  
I caught sight of Ed grinning at me as well, a stream of confetti finishing its glide over to his hair. He didn't bother to pick it off, letting it hang and swing as his head turned over to Al. But he couldn't avoid the bone-crushing hug his brother was wrapping him in.  
"I can't _buh_ -lieve it's been eighteen long years since you came out of Mom!" Al cried out, swinging Ed around a little.  
Ed rested his forehead against Al's shoulder, and if he was trying to hide another grin or a blush, then he wasn't doing a very good job of it.  
"Thanks, Al," he said, light laughter at the beginning of his words.  
Al swung his body, practically throwing him off and putting him right in front of me. Edward's head dipped, noses nearly touching and both of us giving a small sound of surprise. He leaned back, straightening again and his eyes staying wide. His face growing even redder.  
At a loss for what to do, I quickly put the device back in my mouth and blew again, enough for the plastic to roll out but not sound. The tip hit his nose, earning me a small smile.  
"Happy birthday," I said out of the corner of my mouth.  
"Thanks," he told me, and I tried to ignore how my heart reacted, hearing that.

"What should we do for your special day?" Al asked, bright lights of his eyes blinking.

Ed shook his head, straightening his posture. "Nothin' special, that's for sure, Al. We'll just continue like always. It's nothing to get all fussy about-"

"But Brother!" Al was skittering from side to side, and I imagined tears jetting from his eyes. "It's not a birthday unless you celebrate it!"

Ed adjusted his coat, thumbs lingering for a moment as he popped it out. "That's exactly what I'm sayin'."

I looked between them as they bickered, hands near my mouth. I didn't... If it were me...

"I think..." I swallowed, my throat dry as concrete. "We should do something."

They both looked to me, imaginary question marks on their heads.

Finally, Ed sighed, body bowing, eyes closing, and expression in purely playful defeat. "Yeah... Let's do something."

"YAY!" Confetti popped out behind Al. How did he plan for that?!

* * *

"So what should we do?" I asked, hands behind my skirt, both of them carrying Ed's suitcase. The luggage bumped against the back of my knees as I looked to them, walking backwards as they came forwards.

Ed sighed lightly, looking off to the side. "Whatever doesn't eat up our time," he said. "Train leaves at 10am for Yectora."

Al and I nodded, completely understanding. It was an important ride, one that might lead us to some answers. But that was for another time, another stroke of the pen.

Anyway, at that moment, I felt myself grow lighter. A little happier, knowing Ed had survived for this long. Long enough to officially become legal.

He must have noticed the smile on my face, the blush that graced my cheeks because he spoke my name in playful question.

"What're you up to, in that head of yours?"

I looked up, hand still lightly curved by my mouth. Head shaking and tendrils slipping from behind my ears, I replied.

"N-nothing, Edward," I said, and the name I usually called him in my mind slipped out, deepening my blush. I stopped walking, causing them to stop as well, and waved my hand in dismissal. "I-I'm just thinking of how nice the weather is."

Ed nodded, a small hum coming from him. He glanced up, squinting a little at the blue partially covered with white. "Yeah, it is nice out. Clouds would make for a good scenic backdrop."

My hand lowered completely, and clutched Ed's suitcase. Holding it in front of me.

"Y-you're thinking..." _Of drawing me?_

With the widest grin, he nodded once. "You got that right! I'll pick the perfect background this time, one that's not in a hotel room!"

The grin on my face was full of defeat. "Of course..."

The Elric brothers just laughed.

* * *

The train car bumped along, grooves slipping the wheels into small caverns.

I turned away from the window, looking to Edward.

"Are you sure you want to spend your birthday on a train?" The question slipped out, a sentence that never needed to be said.

Ed gave a firm nod, glove hand positioned at his face, thumb resting his jaw. "What we're after is more important than ambling around town."

 _Are you sure?_ I wanted to say more, but Al asked before I could speak. Like an owner speaking for its dog.

"Are you sure, Brother? This day only comes once a year."

Something of a scowl came between Ed's brows, a slight frown pulling at his lips.

"You two worry too much," he gruffed, turning towards the aisle.

An idea dawned on me. I quickly stood, slowing halfway through while brushing off my skirt. I had to act like I wasn't racing...

"I need to go to the lavatory," I quietly announced, watching Ed nod and Al smile.

I passed by the bathrooms, headed into the car in front of us.

The employee turned, facing towards me as I approached. Light blonde hair streaked with grey was tied into a bun, and her eyes crinkled as she smiled at me.

"Is there something I could help you with, dear?"

"Y-yes," I said, and dug into my purse.

As I did this, I spoke, voice quiet. "I'm hoping to buy a bottle of chardonnay. How much would that cost?"

She nodded, and with another smile, she glanced to the person sitting before her. Someone ordering a sandwich.

"You must like him a lot to get something like this," she told me, rummaging through the cart.

"I do," I replied, the smile coming to me so easily. "He's a very good friend of mine."

Something about that did damage to the fluttering in my gut, a few butterflies dying and dropping away. My smile didn't falter as I mentioned the occasion, and I watched her nod before bending down to open the cooler at the base of the cart.

When she stood, she turned the bottle enough for me to see the label. An ace of spades. I recognized the brand instantly; it was the same type Ed bought for me during our first train ride together, the one to Central.

The butterflies in my stomach grew in number, rising up a little higher.

"That's perfect," I told the employee.

She smiled, and the Ace of Spades logo on the bottle turned away from me again as she directed her focus to some small chart on the cart. And then she recited the price.

My hair stood up, and I swore I saw stars for a moment.

"D-do you take checks?"

I half-prayed that I had enough in my bank account, as she nodded. Part of me wondered if there was even any money at all in there, after what had happened...

She nodded, writing something out on a piece of paper. "You said it's his birthday? Maybe we should sing to him."

I forced out a polite smile, just imagining his hand against his face, head bowed low. "I... Don't think he would like that," I said. "I'm sorry."

She seemed surprised. "Ah, good! We don't like it, either!"

I laughed at this, and after a signature above hers, I quickly wrote out a check.

"He must be pretty special to get something like this," she said, and once again I felt heat rise to my cheeks. "Tell him we don't normally take checks, but for you, I'll make a special exception."

I nodded, bowing my head in respect as she reached out, taking the slip of paper from between my fingers. I blushed a little bit, smiling as well. "Thank you. I appreciate it."

The employee just smiled, nodding a little as she flipped over the piece of paper and endorsed the check. "It's a good thing I'm ahead of all this food service! I'll split the cost with everyone else." A quirky grin came to her as she threaded the pen in between her ring and middle finger, securing it in place and giving her room to hand me the bottle. "No promises they'll get a fair share, though."

"Thank you." I smiled, and put a hand up at her offer of the bottle. "If you could hold onto that, until the cart rolls around. We're a car behind, you see..."

"I'll keep it safe then," she said, one finger to her lips, and her wink sent another flutter of butterflies to my stomach.

* * *

I tried to act natural, as I slipped back into our booth and smiled at the Elrics. And then I noticed the notebook in Ed's hands.

Or the sketchbook, to be more precise.

"You're... You're going to draw me now?" I asked, dumbstruck. Enough for a sweatdrop to come to me.

Ed nodded, grinning at my disappointment. "You're perfectly set by the window, there's enough light, and it'll be a challenge to get the passing scenery outside from the window."

I nodded, straightening and crossing my legs. Looking up at the corner of wall and ceiling, curving my lips into the width and curl of a c.

"Perfect! Stay right there!"

So I was getting better at my tricks, following his subconscious command. I could perform, act as I needed to.

After a few moments of silence that only the train car filled, I saw Ed get up, tucking the sketchbook between his arm and his side. He reached out, taking that strand behind my ear and bringing it to the front, bringing it to fall over my chest.

"This strand's tricky," he said, voice hushed. Laced with something slightly heavy. Something I couldn't decipher, couldn't put my mind to.

He left it alone, after that. Tending to other parts of my hair. Moments that raked tension into my guts, clawed and ripping open a whirlwind of pain.

I kept smiling.

His eyes moved over my face, staring at my lips a moment or two more than they should have. By the time he had leaned back into his chair, my face was flushed red.

"You think you can keep that blush?" Ed asked me, and it just made me blush a little more that he had noticed.

"You wouldn't be able to capture it," I said, and I realized how insulting that probably was. I glanced over to him without breaking my position, seeing his head propped to one side by a loose fist, his lips curved in a soft smile. "You don't have the right color, I mean."

I noticed Ed just shrug, not really caring. "I don't have the right color for the rest of you, either," he replied.

"I think that shade of black fits," I said.

He just shook his head, unclicking the pen and positioning it at the page. He looked up, that expression of pure focus giving way when he saw me again. I hadn't moved from where he put me, but I watched that soft smile come back to his face. I blushed a little more.

"Good," he said, and began to draw. "We need to keep it that shade."

I couldn't believe he was doing this! Does he want my face to melt off?!

Ed grinned wide just as I thought that, like he was reading my mind. I stifled a sigh, hoping the food cart would roll around soon so I could give him his first gift...

The cart came by, after about a half-hour. Ed didn't even notice it, still so focused on the drawing.

"Excuse me." The bottle was presented with both hands, chilled from the bottom of the cart. I felt a flash of panicked embarrassment, and almost broke my position. My eyes went wide, staring at Edward, and when he looked up, he flinched with shock.

I glanced towards the cart, flicking my eyes and hoping he'd notice.

He did, and I finally said the words I had been rehearsing since the day began.

"Happy birthday, Edward."

There was so much sincerity and gratitude in the way I spoke those words. I really didn't mean for them to slip out like that, but the way they rolled from my tongue just made my stomach warm. Ed seemed a little bit surprised, and then before I could see the final shade of his blush, he looked down, hair swinging and hiding part of his face from me. One finger absentmindedly scratched at his leg.

"Thank you," he told me, his voice soft enough to match mine. Especially when he spoke my name. For some reason, the warmth in my stomach got a little bit warmer. With a smile still on his face, he looked up, meeting my eyes with his blush mostly gone, and then looked over to Al as well.

"I'm really glad I could spend this day with you guys," he said.

Before I could do or say anything else, he grinned wide and straightened his posture enough to put his arm on his brother's shoulder. "Maybe we'll have some cake, Al! I'll let you know if it's worthy of your list!"

I tucked away the idea of buying him a cake when we got to Yectora. I'm sure there had to be a bakery nearby somewhere.

The sound of my name broke me from my thoughts.

"Yeah?" I asked, repeating such a useless word at the sight of Ed's grin.

"I just asked if you'd like some of this," Edward said, swishing his wine towards me. The light olive-gold spoke to me, beginning to be sipped.

I smiled at the employee, who waited with a glass.

"I'd love some."

* * *

When the sky had faded to black and the train slowed to stop at Yectora, we stretched our legs as we dismounted the train, feet a little unsettled from two bottles of wine. One paid by each of us.

Ed hopped down, arm briefly on top of his brother's. "Let's see if there's bakery," he said, remembering our promise to get a cake.

Al and I agreed with quiet nods, and with the citylight guiding our path, we casually searched for an open sweetery.

"Who would be open at this hour?" Ed wiped a wrist underneath his eye, yawning loudly. "City's pretty much dead, but if we catch them at the right moment..."

I remembered the night his sight was transmuted, a blackness bolted with red. I remembered how the restaurant we came across accepted our need to celebrate, after seeing the contents Ed's wallet. Their doors had opened, so maybe this bakery's would as well.

I smiled to myself, something I had been doing a lot lately.

I didn't catch when it had happened, but when my eyes opened next, Ed was walking with me, golden eyes curved at the bottom. As if he were happy to see me happy.

To our luck, there was a bakery that was just closing down when we came around. Ed ran forward, cash waving in hand. "Hey! Hey there!"

With key turning lock, a mustached man looked to us. Blinking, then looking up at the cash in hand. A memory flashed; a shorter Edward opening his wallet with a devilish grin.

The height increase got to me again, as he ran forward, staggering as he stopped. "We were wondering if you had any cakes available."

The owner looked at Ed, eyes glancing over him as a whole before looking to the cash in hand. He nodded, and twisted the lock again. Brightening the store as he stepped in, welcoming us with bright lights and a brighter smile.

* * *

The cake was good, more filling than I could handle with just one slice. The fork slipped from my lips again as my foot curved around the coffee table. Alcohol-induced laughter bubbling from my lips.

Ed laughed, too, cheering with the bottle in hand. And then he stood, stumbling and tripping over the corner of the table.

His face came close, nose tapping against mine once. Both our faces flushed with red.

Al giggled, from his place on the armchair.

Ed slithered a little as he pulled back, bare hand brushing over his lips. "S-Sorry," he slurred, and I just grinned wide. Trying to fight back my blush.

Ed side-stepped through the space between me and the coffee table, flopping down beside my frame and giving a light exhale.

"I'll take the couch," he said.

Even through my drunken stupor, I laughed behind my lips. Leaning closer to him, arms wrapping halfway around his masculine frame. "There's two beds," I replied, my own words slurred from a hazy mind. "We can share."

Ed shook his head, fast enough for his face to blur. "It'sokay." His lips sealed shut, trapping in a hiccup, and I gave a single muted laugh, nuzzling my face into his shoulder.

I didn't fail to notice how the muscles beneath my skin flexed in show.

After a few more minutes of soft chatter and blurred thoughts, I nodded off, still wrapped around Ed. I woke up with the lights still on and Al looking up. Or at least the familiar click of his helmet told me so.

I squinted at him, some part of me noticing Ed leaned back, Adam's apple protruding out as he remained sleeping up at the ceiling. I blinked again, and unwrapped my arms from Ed.

"What time is it?"

Al looked over at the clock, something my headache-induced mind couldn't be bothered with. "It's a little after one," he said.

I nodded, wiping my eye with the back of my wrist. Bleary eyes stared at my skirt, fabric wrinkled in half and reminding me of the onyx night sky or Ed's pen. Even if the ink was a little bit gray.

I smiled a little bit to myself, not currently caring about much of anything. With water on my mind, I stood, leaning and bending over in a stumble, muttering about my new found quest to Al.

Every footstep I made just reinforced the headache. Like a chemical equation, I should've known to balance it all with water... Another error, I suppose. Just one more to add to the list.

That familiar weight began to settle in, first cascading down the top of my head before swinging in my chest like a weighted hammock. Like an old friend.

Memories broke against the wall of my consciousness. A hospital rooftop, a broken-down body completely surrendered to Ed's embrace. I couldn't shake these memories away; they seized me, froze me in place, and the water glass slipped from my widening grip.

It shattered against tile flooring, and Ed snorted awake.

"What happened?!"

I stepped over, hand to my mouth and eyes to the watered floor. "I―I..."

"Her water glass shattered," Al responded, speaking the words I couldn't.

"Oh." The word deflated from Ed, lowering his back a little. He blinked, one eye after the other, before sitting up and stretching out his arms. Flexing that muscle again.

I blushed deeply, and stepped around the shattered glass. Muttering something of an apology.

"Don't worry about it," Edward replied, shaking his head. He already had the broom, sweeping up the mess I had made. Restoring the broken down parts again, like he had before.

Like he always would, as long as I was around them.

I couldn't let it get this way.

"Here." My hand wrapped around the tip of the broom's handle, stopping its movement.

Ed straightened, drawing back the broom and positioning it to his side like a bo staff. He shook his head, refusing me yet again. "Don't worry about it. It's just a little bit of glass."

 _That I caused._ Tears threatened the surface of my eyes, creating a rim of red I hope didn't seem noticeable. But knowing his attention to detail...

He resumed sweeping, after my hand delicately slipped away. Hanging by my side again, weak and unrelentingly apologetic. I'd always be like this. Causing messes that he would clean up.

It was our cycle, and I needed to end it.


End file.
